From where can I take your desire? I feel so unmotivated these days, however, back to the topic, as it was mentioned you need to focus more on yourself and read a lot, every millionaire recommends reading especially self-development books. I made reading a habit in high school, and that changed my life radically. I became more self-disciplined, started to look after myself, and find the things I like to do. And I got to the point when I was writing my computer science personal statement, of course, helped by an editing service, as I always have been bad at writing, but this never stopped me to do what I like.