Leeo_SA

Date: 2.1.25 Relevant incidents today: Nothing. Sleep: Good Difficulty PM (mastrubation & porn): 0/10 Supplements: 1 capsule Tyrosine, didnt want to take Iboga bc afraid that it could have some effects one day after mushroom trip. What I am proud of: Had a really nice chat with @Exystem. Was great to talk with somebody, which is on the same intellectual and spiritual level. Further I was proud of myself that I respected my mood and body and didnt pressure myself in working. I was tired today and respected that.

Date: 31.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Nothing special. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 1/10 Supplements: What I am proud of: Date: 1.1.25 Relevant incidents today: Had a really nice 3.4g mushroom trip today. Discovered reality and myself. I took videos of myself speaking to me for insights in my life aso. It did go well but 3-4h longer than usual (I think due to iboga micrososing). Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 1/10 Supplements: 0.14g Iboga and 1 capulse Tyrosine What I am proud of: I was amazed by the intelligence of our existence. I really want to share my deepest greatfullness of my life. For that, I am doing my meditation praxis and sometimes mushrooms.

since those Substances Are illegal, I cannot think of another way which isnt sketchy...Even if you have a dealer, you never know for sure what you are consuming. For this case I Like switzerland. There is public authority avaiable, where you can test your substances for exact ingredience.

I See your Point. Never Seen it that way but you are Right! Thank you for your Reflection 😊🙏

Hi guys, I started watching Leos Videos 4 years back and want to get serious with spiritual work. I am searching now a meditation habit and came across Culadasa "the mind illuminated". I like it because it seems there is a map how you know when you need to progress to the next step. It sounds plausible, and would prefer to have some feedback: Is it good? Or are you guys recommending something else with similar approach? I am not religious, don't want to follow a Guru (didn't work for me in the past). What are your spiritual practice / habits? I really prefer something with step by step instructions and I´ve done Kriya Yoga, Kundalini Yoga, Qi Gong, different kinds of meditation practices, breathing excercises aso. My mind searched all the time for a better practice, so I switched from one to another. Now I want finally to stick to one practice.

@Something Funny i got it from my father. He tried it but didnt have Any effects. He got it online Form germany because it is legal over there. maybe you get it from darknet?

@Buck Edwards I would add "observe the Part in you who judges"

@Breakingthewall I See it similar. Getting rid of everything, which I am Not.

@Soulbass I've Never done it but read a Book about it. I have a Problem to wake up in the Night, stay awaken for 15-30min and go back to sleep bc I sleep with my GF together and dont want to wake her up. (Books recomendation). are there other ways to train LD? How Long did it take in your case?

I had some Deep talks to another human being which is awaken. My "goal" is to See currently myself as that which I am really and demonstrier Reality. problem with a teacher outside of me: I Feel it is a trap. They Are just here to pinpoint but I have to do the work. I had Deep awakening experiences with psychedelics, I know that I am god, and other stuff but I want to manifest it in life.

Date: 30.12.24 Relevant incidents today: We drove back to our home today. I was not in a good mood in the car, didnt know why. was tired, exhausted. At home I was somehow filled with pressure and was angry. After meditation I felt a bit better. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 1/10 Supplements: 0.13g iboga and 1 capusle Tyrosine What I am proud of: Sexually active with GF, tieded up my stuff, ended drawing flags, done 2x meditation.

Date: 29.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Was a really good day. Yesterday evening I had cravings and started to see the thought in my head as a thought I didn't see it as a command to follow. Helped!! Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 0/10 Supplements: 0.13g iboga What I am proud of: Very productive morning Tieded up Notion Cleaned shoes Done Introspection Went out for a walk Saw some friends in the evening Saw some videos about addiction

@Something Funny What is your goal with it? Did you do it? What are your experience? Preferences on supplements are highly subjective. I tried a few of yours like ashwagandha and lions mane. First one didnt affect me at all and with lions mane I had a bit more awareness. Didnt do micrososing of psilocybin - how much do you take? I am doing L-Tyrosin and Microdosing Iboga for 30 days for balancing my mood and dopamine system and it works extremely well.

Ok, good for you. Nice Idea, maybe there Are others in this Forum who wants to join your challenge 😄

@Princess Arabia I relate to this in that sense, that the ego needs drama to survive. With the drama the ego has something to do and certain things to hold on so that you get relieve from pain or Self-Sabotage yourself Even more in that story of pain (drama). No pain = no drama = no ego Motivation works in 2 ways: - away from something (pain) - Or towards something (your Dream or so) Motivation from pain is much more Common (My subjective opinion)

@Something Funny I know it is a coping mechanism for boredom, feeling overwhelmed, not being in harmony with my needs, stress, bad mood.

Yes, that is my plan. Really or is it just your Egos excuse because you dont want to admit yourself that you are addicted? No offence, just asking. I had the same view and tried to stop watching porn for 1 month. I was not able to do that so I saw that I was addicted. ______ Date: 28.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Nothing worth mentioning. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 0/10 Supplements: 0.18g iboga What I am proud of: I walked for 90min while listening to podcasts and music, was very happy today, meditated, drew lots of flags in the evening

- always when my biggest fear came up, fear of existence, I looked it straight in the eyes. Now I dont fear that Fear anymore - Not knowing exactly where to go and experimenting with life is normal. Learning that something isnt for me is also really important. - money is Not important for me as I thought. More important is to find my niche and being content in the Now.

@Candle I see your point after you edited, you mean not quitting with masturbation / sex, there we are on the same page. But I want to quit to jerk off to porn bc then I have a non existing sex life with my GF and struggle to keep on motivation on my purpose. I quit smoking and alcohol due to respect to myself and seeing it as a social construction for dealing with emotions. I agree with you that good health and fitness are important. I add life purpose, healthy dealing with emotions, feeling your own needs and being aware of your different states during the day.

@Candle I don't See it that way. It is an Addiction, Are you telling the first point also to an Alcohol Addict? Consuming a bit is Not an option ... why do you think Like that?

@Candle Thank you for your resources, I am going to watch those playlists. Yes I want to decrease it to 0 bc it is destroing my motivation for my life purpose and my happiness. I know, bc of that I learned not to beat up myself if I relapse. Thank you for your input!

@Evergreen Hi, nice to have you here! Yes, but currently more into spirituality and psychedelics. what is your current Situation / Interest / struggle?

Everyone who understands German is welcome! Group about topics regarding Germany, Austria and Switzerland. Where are you from? I am from Basel, Switzerland

When I am horny, I do one of following things: Eat something with sugar Going outside Go to my GF and tell her Do something different My triggers: Boredom When I'm on Steam When I'm on social media When I have overworked myself When I don't know what to do When I don't feel like doing what I'm doing. When I have slept badly When I am inattentive When I have no motivation When I take on too little When I take on too much When I lie in bed and am on my cell phone. When there is a relapse, I do intense self-inquiery. Template: Date: Relevant incidents today: What I am proud of: Learning: Date: 18.12.24 Relevant incidents today: - Was horny for a bit around 10.30, then ate a piece of chocolate and was fine again. - Looked at the shelves again and again to find the anatomy book. - Drank non-alcoholic beer in the evening: had trouble concentrating afterwards, didn't feel like drawing flags or anything challenging. Sleep: Slept poorly, need for P was present in the morning. Evening: fell asleep quickly, didn't masturbate Difficulty: 4/10 in the morning, 0/10 in the afternoon Supplements: Day 4 of Iboga approx. 0.14 g, calm head, good basic mood What I am proud of: I wrote 5 applications ______________ Date: 19.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Felt horny several times in the afternoon between 12:30 and 13:30, no immediate plan what to do. Just observed it, nothing happened. Before dinner I was on YouTube and saw on the reels that there were revealing women. Ignored them, but felt a brief surprise. In the evening I typed in “keycaps” and saw that someone was offering hentai keycaps. I only noticed it, there was no reaction. Sleep: Awake in the morning, slept very well Difficulty: 1/10 Supplements: Day 5 of Iboga approx. 0.22g, very good mood while walking and day 1 of Tyrosine What I am proud of: Wrote 6 applications, went for a walk, had fun, peace and quiet inside me - enjoyed the day - Did back exercises - Reflected a little in the evening - Practiced flags of Africa - Reward in the evening: watching Youtube _______________ Date: 20.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Toilet: briefly startled / triggered by YouTube short overview, lewd picture. Nap: Horny, touching, then left it alone. After the walk I was in bed, was afraid I'd fall in, but no, then got up again. Watched documentaries about Africa in the evening. Then came across a page where tribes were shown. Then found myself in a tunnel for a short time to see breasts or more. Relapse. One thing led to another and then watched porn + orgasm. Thoughts: “I'm fine, it's not a relapse if I just Google Tribes and look at boobs. It's ok, I can stop at any time, I'm not as turned on as usual. I'm not even really horny ” before that, it announced itself when I thought about how I was behaving after reading with my girlfriend so that she wouldn't notice and wouldn't ask. Learning: No cell phone in bed, look at my inner thoughts with mindfulness. Sleep: Slept very well, very good mood in the morning, annoyed and angry around noon Difficulty: 0/10, 8/10, 8/10, 9/10 Supplements: 0.14g Iboga, very good mood, had a beer at lunchtime, which was not a good idea. possibly due to the fact that I had a headache after the walk. In the evening fondue and about 3 non-alcoholic beers. Felt the alcohol a little. What I am proud of: 15 today!!! Applications written! Went for a 1.5 hour walk Learned 50 Africa flags Didn´t beat myself up due to relapse. _________ Date: 21.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Nothing worth mentioning. In the evening on the suburban train I was briefly sick and my head was spinning as if I was going crazy (possibly due to solipsism, iboga or something else, sugar excluded as I had a licorice before) Sleep: Slept well, a bit annoyed around noon, neutral to very good in the afternoon and evening Difficulty: Whole day 2/10 Supplements: 0.14 Iboga What I am proud of: Read and finally meditated again for 10 minutes, concentrating on exhaling and thinking “think” when thoughts came and back to breathing Going for a walk, learning flags ___________ Date: 22.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Nothing worth mentioning. Out and about with Steffi and Patrick in the evening. Then did something with GF in the evening and then an orgasm with myself. Sleep: Slept well, good mood, Difficulty: 2/10 in the evening 8/10 Supplements: 0.11 Iboga What I am proud of: Walked and read __________ Date: 23.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Mobile phone in bed at midday, listened to yoga nidra and played around on my phone, then fell asleep. Nothing happened. In the evening: went to bed with my cell phone because I didn't have my watch on. Then the fear came up that I would now reach for it and watch porn. When I wrote these lines, the fear went away. The fear went away. thought like:” Now it's too late anyway, you should have just put the cell phone away. For the next time you know“ so perfidious, how this part wants to fuck with me!!! I realize I'm a little horny and my head is shaking/active at the top right. Fell asleep very late and slept badly. Changes: Put cell phone away right away in the evening, and no more sexual thoughts in the evening, don't challenge anything. Either sexual fantasy or sleep. As soon as the brain area is active, I can no longer sleep. Arm hurts too. Sleep: Difficulty: morning and afternoon 0/10, midday 9/10 Supplements: 0.13 Iboga What I am proud of: Walked and read, and read some interesting things on actualized forum __________ Date: 24.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Yoga Nidra at noon, everything ok. no need today. Sleep: Slept badly but was able to learn after a few coffees Difficulty: Supplements: 0.13 Iboga What I am proud of: I did some brainstorming in the cafe this morning, cleaned up Notion. In the afternoon I had good conversations with my girlfriend's cousins (Dieter & Christa side) ______ Date: 25.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Wanked off briefly with orgasm after getting up. Otherwise no need all day. In the evening at 8pm the need came up. Wanted to work on my next YT video. Also had 2 non-alcoholic beers today. Sleep: Slept well Difficulty: Evening 6/10 Supplements: 0.18 Iboga What I am proud of: Overcame triggers 2x in the evening today! Super Leo 😊😘 ______ Date: 26.12.24 Relevant incidents today: Nothing worth mentioning. I read with Nalie in the evening. Didn't feel like reading a psychology book so I downloaded a novel. super Leo! Meditation did me a lot of good. Concentration on breathing and then, when a thought comes, “thinking” thinking and back to the breath. 15min. Sleep: Difficulty: 2/10 Supplements: no iboga today, but 2 capsules of tyrosine instead What I am proud of: Meditated, drew lots of flags in the evening, potted with GF and her sister

@PurpleTree Name one country, which this isn´t the case. We are humans, everyone has another moral compass ... btw are you swiss?