Leeo_SA

@Leo Gura I think it is time to delete Elon Musk from Stage Yellow 😅

Date: 18-21.1.25 Relevant incidents today: The urge came up and noticed some changes in my behaviour with Social Media and pictures of woman. On 21. I relapsed in bed (power nap on noon) and in the evening. But I dont know why. I feel strange, I got a job today. Was not really excited about that bc I want to continue my self employment but I need the money. I wasnt stressed, I wasnt in a bad mood. I was anxious of getting back to porn and so it was. Why can I see some picture and I dont bother and then if I am sensitive (however that happens) I am anxious that I fall in this trap? It is like I see those pictures with two different personalities. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 9/10 Supplements: Tyrosin, Omega 3, Ginko Bilboa What I am proud of: Got the job!! I can finally stop doing applications.

@James123 Here is a german group:

@Candle nice to hear that you completed your challenge! You didnt do it for me, but for You 😉

Date: 16.1.25 Relevant incidents today: Noting Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 1/10 Supplements: Tyrosin, Omega 3, Ginko Bilboa, Magnesium What I am proud of: Worked through some limiting beliefs. Date: 17.1.25 Relevant incidents today: Nothing Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 1/10 Supplements: Tyrosin, Omega 3, Ginko Bilboa What I am proud of: Worked through some limiting beliefs. Was happy today, had some rest time in between my clients.

Date: 15.1.25 Relevant incidents today: M in bed after a 1min struggle if I should or shouldnt. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 7/10 Supplements: Tyrosin, Omega 3, Ginko Bilboa, Magnesium What I am proud of: I worked through 3-4 limiting beliefes today. Worked for about 90min and started after that my day with my clients. Further I applied for around 8 jobs and had a great time with one of my clients.

Date: 14.1.25 Relevant incidents today: M in shower, was nice. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 3/10 Supplements: Tyrosin, Omega 3, Ginko Bilboa, Magnesium What I am proud of: Worked for about 90min and started after that my day with my clients. Had not so much motivation for work so I did a break in the afternoon.

Date: 11.1.25 Relevant incidents today: No self-sabotage, nothing special. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 1/10 Supplements: Tyrosin, Omega 3, Ginko Bilboa, Magnesium What I am proud of: Worked for about 90min and started after that my day with my clients. Had a conversation with a guy who probably is going to be a client and had an interview for a part time job, which went pretty well.

Date: 11.1.25 Relevant incidents today: There were some ads of nude woman when I watched a TV show on a streaming platform. It didnt botter me at all. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 1/10 Supplements: Tyrosin, Omega 3, Ginko Bilboa, Magnesium What I am proud of: Worked for about 90min, did alot of personal work and had a nice day!

Date: 10.1.25 Relevant incidents today: Had back pain again. Went to medical center. Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 0/10 Supplements: Tyrosin What I am proud of: Was happy altought I had pain. In the evening, before I went to the doctor, I had a nice conversation with a new Client from HI. Date: 11.1.25 Relevant incidents today: M in bed today, without yes / no, Yes / no thoughts. was nice! I have the controll, not my automatic behaviour! Sleep: good sleep Difficulty: 3/10 Supplements: Tyrosin What I am proud of: Worked for about 2h, organized my dashboard in notion aso. Was a nice day!

Good Idea! Thank you for that Input! That makes Sense! date: 9.1.25 Relevant incidents: nothing Sleep: very good Difficulty PM: 2/10 Supplements: nothing What I am proud of: I got invited for an Interview. I Spoke the truth about myself that I want to be Self employed in the Long run. I am Proud about that and that I dont let my anxiety take over. further I had a hard but nice day. I got another offer for an interview as well as a Coaching request 🤗

@mmKay Thank you for your reply. I understand know, why I am more tempted after a phase of abstinence. I read the book several years back. But since then I forgot a bit, will do some research.

@mmKay Yes I tried. But I am afraid a bit that I overdue fapping as well. My biggest struggle is that I see myself, that I have periods of 3-4 months were I fap to porn regularly followed by 3-4 Month where I dont even think on porn. I tried several methods for recognizing the thought which triggers the behaviour for looking at porn at the end. And that works at the moment well. But when I have the urge again in a few weeks or months, than I don't remember, that I need to look at my thoughts and bring distance in between. But that is also just a believe I think ... Date: 6.1.25 - 8.1.25 Relevant incidents: Just today: i fapped in the shower, felt good! Sleep: very good Difficulty P: 2/10, M: 8/10 Supplements: nothing What I am proud of: I meditated again but stopped today in the second meditation. I asked myself, why I am overdoing it. Further I had again a really nice conversation with a friend. I feel like I am in a transition. Topics Enlightenment is very present at the moment and also letting it go.

Date: 5.1.25 Relevant incidents today: Was really horny the whole day. In the evening I had an orgasm with my GF. After that, my mood got uplifted like a withstand went away which was very surprising bc I didnt want to have an orgasm. In the afternoon I felt a big resistance to work and to do anything. Sleep: very good Difficulty PM (mastrubation & porn): 9/10 Supplements: 0.12g Iboga and 1 capsule of Tyrosin. I stop now with Iboga. Maybe I do it again in one year in winter. The experiment with Iboga and Tyrosin was superb! I experimented a lot with different substances in previous years but this combination had the biggest impact on my mood and handling with anxiety. Every winter I am another man, have more interest in meditation and spiritual pratice but have also winter depression. With this combination (or also without Iboga) I am in another mood. What I am proud of: I meditated today 3 times, 1x 30min, 1x 25min, 1x 20min. Tomorrow I start with walking meditation. Further I had a new client in my part time job: an 101 year old man, he runs like he is 40tish, he eats fruits (in comparassion to other elderly people who are eating just garbage), he is pretty optimistic and has a really good brain (no alzheimer or so). Was nice to be with him! In the evening I made an exercise for introspection due to my resistance to work. Was also a great excersise! Further I applied to 5ish jobs.

@Princess Arabia Thank you for your reflection. Perhaps the ego feels more threatened when it knows that it is real. @The Crocodile Crazy!! As long as we know it is fake, it is funny. It's like comedy and satire. That is social accepted even if the comedian does some racist, female, or minority jokes (ok not by everyone). But when it is not in a context of comedy, it is a problem.