Ross

What do you guys think in terms of going out alone to meet women (daygama and nightgame)?

@Shab-e Ma_araj I am only doing this for improving my self, not for the girls!

@zasa joey Dude have you ever watched the video from Leo 'How to deal with Difficult and Toxic People'? These people you are describing are TOXIC. You need to cut them out of your life, like cutting of a tumor.

Hey guys, I am really bothered by one or two humiliating things that happened to me in the past and I am just asking how you can let go from them? Thanks

Thanks @Kelley White

Guys, I think Leo should create a video based on the title. I think this is quite an overlooked life skill in Actualised.org which needs to be discussed. I believe it's important because this skill can help you a lot in life, in terms of getting more respect from peers and managing tough people and relationships.

Hey people, Just want to ask if it would be advisable to start the spiritual journey really young (college) or pursue it in mid to late ages in your life? I am asking because from what I have read enlightenment is a pretty big commitment and I quote from Leo, 'BRUTAL'. Cheers.

Plus it's a very desirable trait for men to have!

@Leo Gura You said in the thread that you don't want to change society, but why? Wasn't one of the goals that you mentioned in Actualised. org was that you can reach a stage of mastery where you can change peoples' lives?

I think when you are not already enlightened, it will initially help you out in achieving your goals when your ego is still prevalent. When you are enlightened it might be a different story...

The thing is that even though enlightenment is technically a one way ticket to happiness, there will be a lot of change happening to oneself. In what way has this journey changed your lifestyle in positive and negative terms, and will there be some parts of 'you' (personality, hobbies etc) that will go away or stay.

Alright guys, I just want to discuss a small problem. When I am out to meet women and get laid, I usually try to hit on girls in nightclubs. The problem is that if the interaction goes horribly or I get rejected, it's so awkward meeting them another night (if I bump into them) and they give me the 'looks'. Is there anyway to get over this? PS This case applies to hitting on girls at the gym as well. Thanks

Great responses people! I find pick up quite tough in nightclubs also because I think I'm giving my intentions away. What I mean is that I'm like the only one who is wandering around the club trying to find a girl and people notice that (I think). So I might get a rep as being slightly creepy, which I don't like.

@reez I see where you are coming from haha. I try to be outcome independent but I don't think just saying hello and asking a few questions will get them interested in me.

Hey people, Just a video suggestion where Leo should talk about the effects of meditation in every facet of our lives. Such as relationships, career, hobbies, career, sex life, life style, dating etc I think it's important that Leo should talk about these because I think he has only discussed briefly about the effects of meditation, and not in full detail. This is turn will help us to have a vision so we can keep on track with meditation. Cheers, Ross

Cheers for the responses, I am at University right now so that's why I'm worried about the city I live in for doing pick-up. Is it ok to cold approach people from the university?

Hey people, I just want to discuss something that's not so popular on this personal development page and they are affirmations and visualisations. Are affirmations and visualisations actually useful? I think most of us are practicing affirmations and visualisations and have watched Leo's videos about them. Leo claims that affirmations and visualisations, when done daily, will change your life and more specifically your positive thoughts. But recently I have watched a video from Noah Elkrief about how affirmations (maybe visualisations) do not actually work, which obviously contradicts Leo's points. Watching these videos has rang a bell in my mind. Noah says that these techniques don't work because the human sees evidence that they are not worthy etc, which contradicts the affirmation. I have to say I found it quite true and it can apply to any affirmation. For example Leo's video about not caring what people think, he mentions a technique (affirmation) which is "I am totally independent of the good or bad opinions from others". Even though Leo says this will work, I really struggle to see how this will work in a justified way. The problem which I see is that even though you can say this to yourself, at the same time you (your ego) will question this affirmation because you can not find a reason not to care about other opinions. It's like saying to yourself 'Im a loser', 'Im a loser' over and over again for no justifiable reason. See what I mean (hopefully). I myself am practicing some affirmations (particularly on humour and shyness), and I see some benefits. But I'm not sure changes are happening due to a REAL change in my positive thoughts or it's just Placebo effect. I would like to know about if anyone else has any positive experiences with affirmations/visualisations and what your thoughts are on them. Thanks.

Hey guys, A big problem is I am trying to get selected for a sports team at my university so I can properly play matches. The problem is that I did poorly in the trials and now it's become a culture when since then, I'm not getting selected to play matches. The question is how do I make into the team if I am not getting any match experience and other people are getting better. Is practice alone enough to get to the teams level of experience? Just need some thoughts, Thanks!

Hey people, Watching Leo's most recent video brought up a question in my mind. And that is "does real growth encompass fake growth?". I understand that external success in anything in life does jackshit towards contribution to enlightenment; but I was wondering, would working towards inner happiness and well-being automatically means that a person will get everything in his life (great relationship, great job etc) through enlightenment? Cheers.

Hey guys, I am just coming across a small problem with meditation and enlightenment. I have been doing meditation (do nothing and self inquiry simultaneously) for 1hr per day for a month. I am seeing some benefits but I just want to ask why I am getting more paranoid about people and my friendships!? Will this side effect of meditation go away?! Thanks