Sugarcoat

Why some say higher dose is better because there’s no ego left to resist. I trusted my gut and didn’t try the higher dose still

I wanna try different things This summer when I meet doctor I’ll tell them meds aren’t helping and might ask to stop taking them Cool if you try

I tried up the ass but it didn’t work🤣

I can imagine. That’s why I wanna try the other stuff too. 5 Meo directly attacks and dissolves the self border, that’s what I noticed. It’s crazy how it does that It’s weird because it was like when I did it, I wanted my self back. As if I prefer having a self hahahh

My first psychedelic was first dmt, then 5 Meo dmt, completely alone in my room lol I was too scared to try big doses, so I went very small. I did feel a profound erasing of the boundary between self and other on 5 Meo, it was like melting into the environment, not fully though, still a little ego left because the dose was small I guess. It was a tad bit uncomfortable imo. Some say on smaller doses there is ego left that can resist so it can be uncomfortable, but on larger doses ego is completely gone so no resistance so it actually feels better. But still I didn’t have the guts to try a large dose. People are bold lol. I realized taking psychedelics is pretty hardcore, you could risk a horrible trip. I don’t have much experience, I did it a couple of times and I failed a lot at the administration because my technique wasn’t the best. But it was a little start. My respond won’t probably help you. But I’d say if you’re gonna do it alone start small.

Understood

That’s a good mindset . I find it hard to accept suffering

In my case I kinda find that if a eat healthy and a variety of food, my body feels extra “strong” so it’s actually pretty good at handling the little junk I eat once in a while. So if I eat for example normal portion on McDonald’s I won’t feel negative effect. It’s when I overeat that I feel it

That’s good you eat clean! I aspire to eat even more clean than I do. Age probably plays a factor yes, can increase sensitivity.

I’m not saying it’s 100% true in all cases, but I still think there is some truth to what I said. As I said in another reply, it can be hard to tell wether someone noticing a negative effect from eating a little bit of junk is because they have extra high interoceptive awareness, or they are just more sensitive to junk.

I used to notice a kind of “high” if I ate A LOT of sugary stuff, but not a little bit.

Yea ofc some food are genuinely trash and can maybe have direct effects and are better to be avoided. But it’s still hard to tell if someone eating a little bit of trash and “feeling it” is them having extra interoceptive awareness (which means awareness of the internal) or if it’s a sensitivity/weakness of their system. I would probably feel something if I ate junk food as the dominant part of my diet, but if I eat one meal at mcdonalds , I don’t notice anything off (except if I OVEREAT, but here as I mentioned I said “a little bit” so I’m talking about when you eat normal portions)

If you don’t realize you’re suffering then it’s not really suffering. To me people around me seem kinda content, but maybe that’s just how it seems to me

Tension in face can be a result from tension in upper body. Which can be a result of bad posture, or something wrong in the curvature of the spine (like I have). Tension in jaw specifically can be due to stress and tensing the jaw, or clenching teeth. My best tips are to fix posture, and hang upside down. I promised you if you hang upside down you will feel a release like you’ve never felt before in your entire upper body. You could also strengthen muscles that are weaker, like upper back. Also doing cardio and getting warm and sweaty can help “soften” the muscles

Yea..

It seems to me that the self is this dense structure. It has depth and layers to it. It is made up of mind, it’s a mental self, a mental self image being a part of it. Seems like the brain is imagining it. I did an extreme amount of this kind of self inquiry, more specifically having my attention on myself, observing my self and my thoughts. And contemplating naturally about it as a result. My self started to dissolve. One layer at a time. The layers dissolving felt like a release of tension in my entire system, from top to bottom. Very expansive. My self kept dissolving. April 2023, it was like the ~last~ layer of my mental self dissolved. It was the most profound release of tension in my system. Fast forward, and my self kept dissolving. November 2023, only a tiny speck of ego was left, like a core self that the brain imagines. No more layers. It was like I was at the edge of reality. It was like I was 99% dissolved. I had almost no sense of time, continuity, space/distance, or other. Basically almost no sense of REALITY. Imagine walking around and it’s almost like there’s nothing existing. The little ego left thought to itself, “its almost like there’s no reality” “it’s almost like death”. It was like I was approaching a kind of nothingness. A void. Unconsciousness. Why can’t I dissolve the last speck of self? I realized it’s because I’m not the one maintaining it, my brain is, my brain is imagining a self. I’m not the creator of it. So here I am, in this middle ground, stuck in “semi headlessness”. It’s almost like I’m in a void, I’m familiar with it by now. It has never scared me.

How’s that method going for ya? Didn’t you say your life was hell, full of unbearable suffering ?

@Hojo If you’re scared of death it’s because your life isn’t bad enough for you to find death as a relief Just a thought. I know you could be scared of death and suicidal simultaneously tho

Yea but then the term becomes of no use.

@Jannes ok . Is an alternative to just mark and remove?

Id agree. I just thought if it was some mystical state you reached

What is paragraph key? I am on phone most of the time. I just quote the entire quote, then erase parts by marking it and removing

Yea sometimes it’s the oddest guys that can get girls I don’t know how much the average person suffers. But for me I think I have suffered to some degree every day Maybe.

I suffer too mentally (pretty much every day to some degree) and physically . It hasn’t gotten absolutely unbearable yet. I get suicidal thoughts sometimes. I wonder if I’ll take action on them if my suffering gets absolutely unbearable. Am I weak for that? I don’t know if “suffer all the time” applies to average person but for me I have suffered every day of my life to some degree so it applies to me. How was that state of not knowing?

@Someone here Who is twice his age?