Sugarcoat

Or just be introvert ? ??

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That was sweet of you thanks. It’s up to the moderators at this point I don’t care personally?

No problem ?

Interesting tnx

@NoSelfSelf thanks that was nice summary ? so yea @Ajax basically what he said ? but I’ll add some things here. I’ll try to keep it short. Or not. “how suffering is independent of outside “ “of what “ “by focusing on yourself you are dealing with it directly” Yes so one aspect of self awareness/focusing on yourself, which is the more “spiritual” one which is one of the things I mentioned in the post: becoming directly aware of how your suffering: thoughts , mental projections, feelings, stress in the body, resentment etc (aspects of you) exist on their own, independently from anything outside of you. Yes they could be triggered by outside, and they can be about the outside, but ultimately they are not bound to outside circumstances. So by becoming directly aware of this allows for detachment from them, so this suffering can naturally dissolve by not being “fed” which is what I mean by dealing with it directly. Instead of experiencing/believing , aka “feeding the story”, that something outside yourself needs to change for this suffering to be resolved. So could be anything here, in this post I’m talking mostly about this men/women dynamic so men complaining about women or vice versa. And regarding tension, I basically mean suffering, even if it’s very subtle. So this is more the spiritual aspect as I said but this self focus can permeate all your life just like he said above. also another point about male female dynamic so one thing that decides who you end up with , which I guess is more applicable to women, is not only who you ~attract~ but also who you are ~attracted to~ . So ones taste evolves naturally as one develops , heal and go deeper into oneself. This “sensing” ability grows, so you are sensitive to yourself you become sensitive to others. So instead of worrying about why are men trash ? no problem because you won’t even be attracted to such!! “Focusing on yourself means prioritizing your own needs and desires above that of other people” Yes one aspect. You view people the same as yourself tho. So I’m taking responsibility for myself, others have responsibility for themselves too. I’m dealing w my own shit others deal with their own. You mentioned relationships. Well.. you’re focusing on yourself because you just naturally down to genetical level function that way, and want to, its the only thing that makes sense to you. It works for you. It’s a way of operating, naturally your attention goes to yourself and all that you are. It’s not about being compatible with someone. Someone will be drawn to you because you are as you are, and you will be drawn to them so they become a part of the fulfillment of your desires so become your priority one could say. “Leads to selfishness” well one could say everyone is selfish even those who don’t seem The sexual frustration well focusing on yourself doesn’t mean automatically you do whatever your mind comes up with. It’s more a general way, of you being foundation of your life , optimizing yourself first and foremost ok I’ll end it here ?? this clears something up phew ??✏️✏️✏️✏️ And thanks for your kind words

So I’m guessing the tension part is what sounds ambiguous. Im kinda just shining light on how your suffering is independent of outside so by focusing on yourself you’re dealing with it directly instead of looking for outside solutions . I think you agree with me on some level, but I tend to write drawing from my direct experience, which is a wacky one to say the least so understandable it might not hit home

no problem !

Ok fair enough but is there a difference between enlightenment and awakening so awakening I’m guessing is about true self as consciousness which I’m guessing happened to me because I had this permanent shift …and enlightenment perhaps even that distinction collapses so no consciousness even …….because that is still some form of knowing …. Or ……………

I have like 100 different replies playing out as potential in my mind to your response now do you understand what kind of brain I have? Can’t say what it’s trying to do. But if you don’t understand my post hmmmm I mean what is the confusion …but it’s funny nevertheless I’m having a little fun here you know.. just letting the words flow. The post makes perfect sense to me at least … but the purpose of it is the question mark. Perhaps cleansing perhaps something else… I can elaborate if you have question i believe

Now why didn’t you start?

Mind elaborating a little? I’ve been curious about this as I’ve directly sensed things myself since my shift and thus thought a lot about neurology .

It’s not easy to not check in here constantly ? u too

trust me it’s not for me either?almost like we synchronized or something… now I’m too busy checking myself so better ask someone else ?

Funny because this post I wrote yesterday it was waiting on my phone but these things going on for longer in my mind so relate? This is me cleansing myself of this thing so maybe try it yourself ?

Great post?? the only thing I’d say is isn’t the reason you want to get to know her is that you think she’s cute so potential partner so it’s the exact same thing as the one who goes up to get a date aka to get to know her because she was cute and thus potential partner. Nothing wrong with either just that it’s the same thing.

Self awareness can help with answering such questions ??

you obviously misinterpreted her she was just charming and friendly and you thought she was into you then she rejects you and you feel bad . For what? You didn’t lose anything real, only a false impression you got of her interest which maybe gave you some confidence boost, so basically you basing your confidence on how you believe she perceives you, then when she rejects, this confidence goes away because it was dependent on her . distinguish very clearly between what you feel, your thoughts and reactions, from what happens on the outside. Those internal things are 100% on you to deal w. In my experience bringing your attention fully, directly onto the pain you feeling like a laser is crucial. For that nothing outside you is needed only you can do that.

I was aware of this forum for several years before even daring to take part in it , so relatable. In my experience, when you go deeper into yourself, you develop this sensitivity to and within yourself which makes you simultaneously more sensitive to others. So all these people writing about god and awakening this and that… Can’t say with absolute certainty but with this sensitivity you can sort of sense when it’s the “real deal” vs not. And the real deal is rare.. and funny enough it wouldn’t judge you. A lot of the time the impression I get is that a lot of the talk is somewhat on an intellectual and ego level EVEN if they have had peak experiences. That’s why the word god doesn’t really sit right with me sometimes as my experience of it has been colored by reading here and just smelling the grandiosity at times. So those people slowly ascend down from the pedestal you put them on when you see the games they’re playing.. as you become more sensitive and know yourself deeper. So the posts are not solely the words, there’s a kind of energy to it, and other subtleties. And btw ego isn’t necessarily a problem there is a lot of nuance to it and I would say it’s more about how you relate to it and how it takes form which can be many different ways with various density so forth Also from a place of knowing yourself deeper what you want to write will reflect that and then the replies don’t really matter as it’s coming from this authentic place. “ I ask these questions because I get the rising feeling that awakening would be described as a something that *didn't* encourage me to generate a new internet post--probing for innocuous information out of loneliness or sorrow” I depends on “where you’re coming from” I would say. If you’re a person who tends to engage a lot in a way where you’re agitated for answers and to prove others right by debating etc then I believe awakening would tone down that need. But if you’re the opposite a person who doesn’t engage and has a bit of a barrier that holds them back as you said in the self preservative way then I guess awakening would have the opposite effect of breaking down that barrier so you might engage and express yourself more. It’s quite a narrow view imo to only consider the former. To know which one it is for you or what happens to you when you engage is connected to this sensitivity to yourself by going deeper into yourself I would say. So if it feels expansive or not for example. So even if someone points out your ego to you, that doesn’t have to be an accurate it could just be their impression .

And wise people in themselves ?

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I love this so legendary ??

If you want something bad enough everything about you will be striving for it. So it won’t even feel like a want anymore because you are always moving closer to it. It’s not just in your mind or actions, all that you are down to your genes and energy will be attracted to it. So you working for it yet at the same time it’s being worked for you . So no need for such questions wondering about a method outside of yourself when all that you are has it’s own method continuously working with no breaks to it for even the breaks are a part of its method

I admire your openness? I am the opposite I am too quiet at times so expressing myself more verbally feels expansive for me.

You’re consistent in your confusion ? it’s a certain way of being