CoolDreamThanks

Got an interesting meeting tomorrow, will see how it goes from this state of max efortlesness, path of least resistance. It feels so normal and natural. Might be attractive to others. No pretenciousness, no I am-ness even, no spiritual identity, just natural no effort flow.

I thought I still had to disolve density in the body, like it exists independently of the self. When I drop the self there is no contraction. The more I tried to disolve the contraction the more contraction there was. It was a closed loop. the nature of reality is nothing. this appearance, this happening doesnt arise from nothing, it just arises. It doesnt even arise, it's just a happening, a shifting and morfing infinity. Frank's map is perfect and he explained it so well. I think I'm almost done or done, I feel at the natural state now. No seperation, no self, no god-consciousness, no I-amness. It's so simple in the end wow. I thought it will be more glorious tbh. I will have a sesion with Frank to confirm if I'm done.

Frank said ego is like the commentator on the path, claiming attainments, rareifying experiences, etc. That's literally me. Ups. Ready to die. Anyway.. Had one of the best dreams and worst dreams ever tonight. I think that's a sign of meditation working. Best dream was so good since I met an amazing girl and we were having fuuun

Hm Keith said the main practice of ACIM is to shine the light of awareness on whatever arises to dissolve it. That's the same as vipassana or very close. Not sure if Keith knows that we need to dissolve not only thoughts and emotions that arise but also the body itself. But anyway, if he's right than the main practice is similar if not the same.

Now there's alot of not so sublte sensations and the body moves quite alot when I scan and put attention on the solidity, but that's just solidity dissolving biproduct. Mystical experiences can even occur from dissolution according to mr papa Yang Franky

"Just by putting your attention on sensation/solidity dissolves it in time" That's how Vipassana works from how I understand it now.

Practicing 3 techniques now: 1. Do-nothing - just no intention at all. When I notice an intention I drop that intention. 2. Mindfulness/Concentration - focusing on an object of meditation - either consciousness itself, or music, or the body or whatever. 3. Release/Let go - having the intention of releaaaaseee. Let goooo. When I fully relax I notice hooow fuuuucking rigit and dense and contracted I am. I think if I fuuully release this contrection that feels like ME then I will dissolve into non-duality and be happy. This contraction is kinda horrible to live with, it's usually in the background, but it's the core of the issue, so I feel like the do-nothing technique and the release-let go techniques dissolve the contraction. Maybe concentration is practice is helping this process as well. This is the core of my practice now. Not sure if I need more concepts, and if I do, I just need to perfect the technique of how to dissolve this contraction that is egoic self aka me aka contraction aka seperate self.

Dancing shows so much. When dancing there has to be no self awareness. There just has to be music and dance, no self in there to be aware, when there’s a self it’s like an inrerference pattern that ruins everythinggg

Iuuuuuu wow the best way to enjoy life is to get lost in the flow of it so deeply that you loose your sense of self and your are so one with it all that its just baaaaaaaaaaammmm!!!

need 2 make a habit of cold showers. sooo helpful for the body and the mind.

During my trips, I did realize that to really feel liberated, I will have to somehow dissolve the solidity in the body. It's the biggest block to feeling liberated. It feels like you're a contracted center in this boundless existence. So that's why I love Frank Yang's teaching. He's literally telling you how to dissolve this contraction. And it's the whole issue, this contraction.

Hm this journal is good as a therapy, self-reflective device to see my neurosis, etc.

Hm so Frank Yang calls Unity/Oneness/Non-duality as Love. When I heard Peter Ralston talk about Love he was implying the same thing I believe. In A Course in Miracles Jesus says that Heaven is the awareness of perfect Oneness. I guess that's true if Love is Unity/Oneness. Isn't love that fundamentally? When you hug or have sex what do you do? You unite into one. And the opposite of that is fighting someone, pushing them away - seperating from them, so the opposite of love. But these things are on the relative level and bodies can't really fully unite or seperate, but on the metaphysical level you can unite perfectly with Self, the issue is that you have to dissolve. And how? I think I'll try do nothing meditation now mainly. Concentration practice is helpful too I guess, but I do taht in the form of mindfulness. Pamparammm.

I heard Shinzen Young say that one of his teachers said, Today's enlightenment is tomorrow's mistake. Be careful. And that's so true. A few days ago I thought that everyone is wrong, like Lisa, I don't know, Peter, Shinzen, other non-duality teachers who say that there is no free will, and now I think all of them are right, and I was wrong. I do now think that you can come to the same non dual realization via different roads. ACIM is pointing there with poetic language, others vis meditation, others kundalini, etc.