CoolDreamThanks

Another thing to know is I’ve been to Jan’s in person retreat and neither I nor did anyone else feel a single thing from his “Shaktipat” which supposedly is an extremely strong energy transmission. I also did sessions with Gareth from truespiritualawakening, student of Jan, and felt nothing. I know people who went to 20 sessions with Gareth and felt something in one or two, but just meditating for that long explains that experience. Oh, bdw, a funny thing is that Gareth uses levels of consciousness by David Hawkins to check your level of awakening and in each session he says you leveled up. I told him I dont feel anything and he said yeh sometimes it’s difficult to notice and he trusts his body. Lol. Anyone who is epistemologically rigurous knows that Hawkins technique is bullshit. When Gareth doesnt like the result he got from his test he does it again until he gets what he likes. Haha.

Not sure, but being one of the most enlightened beings, according to him, and being in constant pain is… interesting to say the least.

Not sure if they are the same. Afaik, Jan mainly did Kundalini spine breathing. He focused on raising kundalini up the spine to the top of his head on the inhale and then dispersed that energy throughout his brain on the exhale. It's difficult to pin point a place in your energetic system where kundalini is exactly - it's somewhere around the perineum, but I was never able to connect to it and direct it into exactly the necessary channel in the spine. There are various channels in the spine through which the kundalini can rise, and if you fuck up and raise it through the wrong channel then you will mess up your energetic system and then you will really need a teacher to fix you, if that will even be possible at that point and if you will be able to find a good teacher, which I know none of. The whole kundalini path is like learning surgery through reading a few books written by people experimenting in their basements (Jan) without understanding the extremely complex biological mechanism. The energetic system is complex and easy to mess up. Did you know that Jan is pretty much always in pain nowadays? He has a pain in his lower back and he can barely walk more than 100 meters without extreme pain. He fucked something up. Kundalini yoga isn't something to mess around with, unless you do the nonsense they teach on youtube which does nothing besides wasting your time.

@Salvijus your mind has an uncanny ability to be wrong and believe it is right. It’s spectacular to see. You deserve some sort of a medal.

Andrew Tate says all problems would be solved if women had their body count on their forehead. I’d much rather see the level of consciousness on peoples foreheads, that would solve all of the problems on this forum and globally. Although the higher you are the easier it is to see who is at which level.

Been practicing this as well and feels amazing. Efortlesness. Let life come to you.

true true..

Yes, I'm being very careful not to build some sort of a theory based on assumptions and extrapolations. I will experiment and see if this understanding brings fruits or if I am mistaken once again. Haha. Indeed very much so!

hm, I think my human life is a choice I make because there are still things I value in the dream and want to experience, but wisdom is showing me that it’s time to make a higher choice for true Love. It was an interesting experience to play around in a dream of my creation without being in a relationship with Her, but now I see what I lose when She is not with me and I want Her back. Enlightenment is total commitment, exactly like commiting to a partner in a relationship, but this relationship with Love is actually more real than any relationships in the dream. The thing that stands is that a perfect partner - the Goddess of Love - requires you to be perfect as well - to be pure Shiva - empty, silent, pure and peaceful. Then she can enter you and become One with you, which brings infinite love and beauty. It’s exactly how it was for me in my first human relationship - she was perfect, loving, kind, gentle and extremely beautiful, but I cheated on her because I wanted to experience something else. I did not value her, did not yet see her perfection, so I left her. That’s just a symbolic expression in the dream to show what happened in my mind when I left Heaven wanting to experience something else. What a beautiful symbolic story and how profound — such a huge lesson to learn. So thats why, I believe, Shakti leaves you — not because she does not Love you, but because you yourself are not pure enough and have not yet totally commited to be with Her. You can no longer value and play with things of this dream, you must become commited only to Her. You can use the body to talk about Her and eat if there’s still a need for it, among some other basic things, but that’s pretty much it. Your life has to be Her’s. Basically, your life has to be this:

I think psychedelics (psds from now on) are like giving a call to Shakti and saying; hey, let’s meet up. She comes and either you are pure and totally commited to be in an eternal relationship with her and no longer participate in most of the desires of the world, or she sees that you are not ready to totally commit, kisses you, and leaves. That’s how I will treat Her now. I will treat Her as Goddess with which I am in a commited sexual relationship with, and I am only no longer partaking in the desires in this dream. I eat only what is perfect for my body - mostly fruits and veggies, rice, etc. I go on walks, do yoga, but that’s pretty mych it. My attention is all on Her, so I live an outside life of utmost simplicity, but inside I am showered by infinite love. I basically live the same life Ananda Ma lived. No sex no other things just living in perfect bliss, being totally commited to that Bliss as though you are in a deep loving relationship with That. Isn’t that was she was teaching by demonstration? Look how blisfull I am and taken care of if I dedicate myself totally to God. I expect Her to take care of me financially in whatever way She sees fit. She might instruct me to do something and of course I will. Or she might just miraculously take care of me in Her way withoy any of my effort. I know that if I am with her all my worldly concerns are taken care of. That’s one of the benefits of being in a commited relationship with a Goddess. I won’t quit my job or anthing, but I expect something magical to happen without my effort. The hallmark of being ready to re-enter a relationship with Shakti is living from Peace. You can’t jump from ego, fear and resistence to Love. You go from the mind to Silence and then when you are identified with Shiva you can re-enter the relationship with Shakti. If you are not able to maintain a state of Peace throughout the day then you are not ready for Her. She will just drive you crazy. You have the potential to make bad decisions. You can also create a spiritual conceptual identity and get stuck in it. No, we use the mind only here and there and in between we surrender to her Love and live in Silent embrace. This might not work but I will try it. This is based on my experience and vision and it might transpire to be something magical. Total commitment to Peace and a life of utmost purity + low dosages of psds to call Her and hopefully to keep her. There might be a reintroduction period where we are closer and a bit futher apart, so the Love does not overwhelm me, but that is perfect. Still going to my job ofc, not going there high or anything, just trying this on the evening of Friday and seeing if it stays until Monday if I live as though I live only for Her. Perhaps I am all she wants and if she is all I want then our desires meet in beautiful unity and the state of Heaven is restored.

Here’s what I think: Psychedelics are merely agents in this dream we emplore to carry out our bidding in an indirect manner. Ultimately, there is nothing stopping us from choosing that state now, but since we believe that we are creatures of time and space we still have internal blocks that stop us from experiencing the full extent of the power of our mind because we are afraid of it. I don’t disagree that in the dream you could measure the dosages and see changes in brain chemicals and neurological activity, but those are merely effects. The cause of everything is our desire for it. And the only issue is that we must choose to emplore our desire consciously or unconsciously, masterfully or foolishly. What do you think? @Leo Gura throughout your hundreads of trips and reportedly omniscient levels of intelligence, have you not asked yourself why exactly can you not stay in that state permanently? Why does it leave you? If it’s all mind and you are the only mind there is — what must you be doing to leave that state? You know that those states are magnificient - all disease is healed there and all is perfect happiness. So why does it go away? What is the main blockage here? I loce that psychedelics show us that we can move about in a dream and barely be in it because if we fully surrender we would dissolve into mahasamadhi. But that is not the case now — why does that Infinite Love leave us? Why do we need to spend a lifetime of meditation to merely get glimpses of it? Don’t you think that the more advanced someone is the lower amounts of psychedelics they need and the longer they stay there? And ultimately, when you are clear and pure so as to for Heaven not to leave you, it does not. I’ve been able to maintain a state of unity and love for around 72 hours - 3 full days and nights. I did not sleep, only walked around in parks and enjoyed the beauty of God. I ate a few oranges and that was it. Every step I was showered with bliss and beauty. I was home, yet still walking within the dream. And I would have it none other way - I would love to spend a few years or decades in the borderlands between heaven and earth, with one foot in both, just to get used to that magnificient shift, as it can get uncomfortable to stay in that perfect love for long periods just because it’s so unfamiliar and everything is so new. Another thing about psychedelics is they show you if you are choosing Spirit or ego in an extreme way. If you enter the trip from a place of resistance - you will see that you are fucking up and it will be very difficult to stop doing it at that point. And it can be traumatic or at least very very uncomfortable and scary. But the lesson here is that you are doing this unto yourself. You have failed to properly control your internal state and are now seeing the effects. I wrote in another post that psychedelics can be violent — but actually, now I think that even that depends on you. I’ve had intense and uccomfortable trips where I got entangled in my mind and wasn’t able to escape the conceptual realm, which is horrible on psychedelics as they just show you how insane the conceptual mind is, but I’ve also had many more, like 50 of the 55 I’ve had which they were not only peaceful beyond understanding, but also where you dissilve into Love and you become formless infintie bliss itself. Hmm. It’s a shame there’s no one publicly available who has been able to lock in a psychedelic state. I see teachers who live from presence, but not a single one who is living from profound bliss and peace. And if he’s not careful and completly let’s go he would dissolve into mahasamadhi, so he still maintains a very basic desire or two, like food, which anchors you into the dream just a bit. But most of the days he spends in extreme bliss. Now is this a fantasy of what enlightenment truly is? How can it be a fantasy when I’ve lived that dozens of times, but only momentarily? I haven’t tripped properly for around a year now and I’ve advanced tremendously because of A Course in Miracles — obviously the wisest document/teaching/book/path in all of existence. I think I’ll try and see how long I can maintain it if I do not engage with the conceptual mind and live a very simple life where the human side is minimised and I mostly live in the embrace of God. What if that’s the secret to maintaining that state? I think at the end of the journey something magical like this can indeed happen. But you have to be ultra wise, like one in a billion wise. Yet when you remember that there’s literally only you, then is it really a stretch to think that this dream was built to be a perfect learning place only for you and you are now one of the wisest globally? I don’t think so. If you know that this is a dream which is symbolic of your state of mind and you also know that to escape the human domain, suffering and resistance, you must live from Silence, then psychedelics might just be a road to permanent enlightenment. Maybe. But this applies only to the most advanced few. To be honest - only to one human out of all the seeming billions. So, what are psychedelics in your opinion? How long have you been able to maintain a high state of consciousness and how was it? Do you have any theories as to why that state goes away? Do you think it’s possible for the most advanced ones to use this literally magical tool to awaken fully and stay awake? I was sceptical but I don’t know now - why not? Why couldn’t I extend those 72hours I’ve spent there to 100 and then 200 and then to forever? Very interesting.

Thinking that concepts can connect you to the beauty of God is a deep trap of the egoic mind. God is beyond all concepts, and that is also where enlightenment is. It's a beauty to behold the lengths to which the ego goes to avoid being in Silence because it knows that if it truly understands its own inadequacy, it will soon disappear into the nothingness from which it came. And Leo does not want to disappear - he still gets a lot of juice from the concept of Leo, the wise one, the conceptual identity of the amazing intellectual teacher of metaphysics. Who is Leo without his pride in his metaphysics? Nothing. Back to God -- when you try to conceptualize God, you are trying to put something abstract, perfect, and infinite into symbols (words and thoughts) that are limited, specific, and just overall imperfect. As a result, you end up with a lot of inaccuracies, as most of Leo's content about God and the metaphysics of life is. But he will never admit that a lot of his teachings are inaccurate because his whole identity is built upon him being right in his metaphysical understanding. If he truly understood - if he clearly saw that he was wrong - that would be a huge hit to his ego, and he would do anything to protect himself against that. If you are truly enlightened and live from Silence, you don't become an anti-vax Trump voter -- you now operate from a place of intuitive knowing -- and from that place, you know that nothing here is real and nothing matters -- why worry who runs the world or what effect vaccines have --- it's all a meaningless dream of your own creation. In fact, being identified with a conceptual identity is what creates physical ailments -- that's why Leo is so ridden with diseases and finds no cure - because the disease is himself as Leo -- Leo has to disappear for the disease to go away. Silence is what heals. Medicine of the dream only provides temporary relief from symptoms, which eventually come back anyway. He is stuck in the dream trying to figure out why the dream characters act the way they do; he judges them and calls them stupid, thus cementing himself as a conceptual entity. Who is the stupid one - Donald Trump or a dreamer of the dream who judges the characters he himself is dreaming? Haha. Leo knows intellectually that this is a dream but makes it real to himself psychologically by judging it, going deep into politics, and so on, as though any of this actually matters. Imagine how foolish it is to be dreaming a dream at night and to be so engrossed in politics and other unreal things created by your dreaming mind that you have no actual connection to your divine nature, which is pure Silence. See how this type of thinking is a level higher than anything Leo ever writes? Not that it matters what a non-existant dream entity called Leo does and thinks, but it's helpful to see the traps the mind gets you into.

Nice! I plan to go to one in a month or so. How was the pain? Did you do antything to prepare your body? Were you able to get to that place where pain dissolves into pure vibrations?

Yes, it’s how Jan supossedly rose his kundalini and now is always extremelly blissed out. I’ve read all of Jan’s books and they are queit useful, he talks about bindus that block the flow, various channels for it to flow through, different levels of practice for rasing it, etc.

I did Kundalini spine breathing and also Kundalini Fire or whatever it's called, the most advanced one, based on the SantataGamana books; https://www.amazon.com/stores/author/B0765YXM96 Jan Esmann also teaches Kundalini Yoga. The issue with Kundalini Yoga is that it's very technical, and if you don't have a teacher who will solve Kundalini symptoms, you will probably have energetic issues. I did meet up with Jan Esmann and asked what to do with the intense heat in the back of my head and why I get dizzy. He gave me specific advice on how to solve that - to direct the overflow of energy into the heart center through the channel in front of the spine, instead of sending it back through the same channel that it arose, but then other issues appeared.. There are multiple different channels through which Kundalini energy can rise. It can get stuck. It can get overexcited and kriyas become so intense you can't even sit down and relax (happened to me as well). So yeah, I'd say you need a master to guide you on this path. It's very complicated, and you can f*up your energetic system to a point where you can't even meditate at all without your body twisting and turning frantically. I'm also not sure if it really gets you enlightened. In theory, it should, but in practice, I haven't seen anyone who made it. Jan Esmann and Gareth from True Spiritual Awakening were supposedly awakened through kundalini yoga - but I doubt they are enlightened. Jan said he can't wait to reincarnate. For me you are enlightened if you no longer reincarnate. I think he is just blissed out without truly being awake. Anyway.. Who knows.. Kundalini rises naturally if you practice mindfulness and dis-identify from your mind. It does so gently and without any issues, unlike when you try to force it up with kundalini yoga.