Jannes

The Adhd self help group last time wasn’t that good. That’s the first time. Luckily I have it today again. I don’t think I spoke about anything even but other people seemed to spoke about important things on their heart. The girl in this group I had a certain connection with also didn’t come this time. It makes me think that adhd people can also don’t just understand themselves easily. I saw a study that showed that two adhd people are usually a worse couple then one adhd person and a neurotypical person. This hits me a bit. If two adhd people would understand each other perfectly then one could argue that adhd isn’t that much of a sickness because it wouldn’t create double standards, because if they need a person without adhd that seems like they need someone to balance them out. Two healthy people can get along, two toxic people dont. I am thinking about strategies on how to deal with my adhd currently. A big one seems to be that it’s hard to get out of the emotional state into the prefrontal cortex for doing tasks because the brain lacks dopamine. It suggests that whenever you get into the emotional soup, you should take ACTION to get out of there, dealing with your emotions by feeling through them doenst work because the brain never has the dopamine to win the fight and get out. But then on the other hand am I not surpressing emotions? It’s a difficult balance to strike. I feel like a combination of both worlds would be to talk to someone. Working on finding someone for that.. All of that taking action thing and other events in my life got me into socializing a lot again. Its often in patterns, I try to do it a lot, get exhausted and crawl back into my shelf until it too lonely. I see pros and cons to socializing, on the one hand I actually feel more emotionally in touch with myself especially in my belly area, on the other hand I could go insane from all the bullshit of other people. Today I thought about theraphy again like: "omg what am doing with my life. I am wasting years being unsucessful because I barely get by emotionally. Everything falls because I am not in my power. I need to stop everything I am doing and go to theraphy. Afterwards I can enjoy life again." I liked Leos analogy of trying to change a conservative like trying to change a biting dog who is so fucked up so that he instinctively becomes agressives when one tries to change/ come close to him. Thats me when I am emotionally ungrounded. Of course I dont actually become agressive but act out in ways that builts a distance.

I feel weird posting pictures of his profile, even if I make them anonymous so I rather describe them: 1) Normal selfie, 2) Another selfie, 3) picture of himself in underwear from a distance with his meat quite pronounced, 4) picture in a bathtub with naked upper body, 5) picture of him sitting with shorts and a shirt and visible (through the shorts) boner. So normally on tinder the top picks are exclusively girl. This guy was apparently liked so much that he managed to get a place at the top picks in my city. His face is handsome but not quite model material. I live in Germany btw. I saw this profile maybe a year ago and I still cant get over this. There are so many fantasies in my mind about what women want and which mind games have to be played and this fucking guy just shows off his dick and gets massive likes. The shock will never end.. But when I think about it does make sense. He is has the balls and strategy to pull off this straightforward presentation and (some who are up for casual sex) women want exactly that. And while he is very clear about what he wants (he also uses the 👻 emoji in his bio btw.) he isnt super pushy about it, like he doesnt do a sex pose or writes in his bio that he wants sex and his photos do look chill and somewhat classy. He is like the Mr.Beast of tinder - figured out how this works (for sex) perfectly.

What still counts as a child and what doesnt is a social construct. The decision to put it a few years past the biological milestone puberty is reasonable imo because girls that age just arent that mature yet and we have the luxury to affort it. Historicaly in many countries girls were allowed to marry as young as 12 years old though. I think biologically it makes sense to also be attracted to pubescent women below the age of 18 but there are good reasons (besides legal reasons) to not entertain that idea to deeply because women below 18 just arent very mature.

Thought about that as well at some point. Its a calculated decision. It depends on the type of war, how much value I would likely create for the world when I would flee, how fit and psychologically stable I am for war compared to others, my personality type and how much I could support my country without fighting. You gotta be realistic, going to war is like suicide. You either die or you get at least a shit ton of trauma that you take with you for the rest of your life.

I have noticed that girls who are sexually more open tend to be more interested in muscles but I have a relatively small sample size of where I noticed that. Its probably partly because they allow themselves to be more honest about it.

@Butters Funny but please no.

I bought the Klockern thing to experiment. These machines are a game changer in my thinking, I havent considered that there are other multi functional machines with built in steamer. They are pretty expensive though.

Okay but still I have a bad feeling about it. That method of cooking veggies in an oven with a steel oven tray with cover might be worth trying out. chatgpt says its also a very healthy option compared to normal baking which isnt that healthy but steaming is still king. The method just takes a bit longer

Does this actually work in your experience?

When it comes to spiritual entertainment there is of course Alan Watts.

Good looking guys can be worse at game because they get away with bad behaviour. I am pretty good looking but I was wearing an unimaginable bad haircut a few years ago (I am not joking I disfigured myself) and so I got a lot less attention. That made me more hungry and bold. When I got a decent haircut back everyone was way nicer to me and I got some smiles here and there and couldnt help but soften up. That was all my biological brain rewiring. I was more comfortable in that fight mode though. Not sure when I was better at game though, I never gamed much in either state. I think it might be more easy to be yourself when you are good looking but I am not sure, thats a complex and counterintuitive topic perhaps - you definitely learn better with what you get away with and not when you are less good looking.

Hell no the tinfoil (aluminium) can get into the food. Yes baking with small temperature works but it takes at least 5 times longer then steaming.

Thats not comparable. With hot air circulation you get basically rosted veggies, with steaming veggies maintain most of their moisture and more vitamins. A microwave with real steam mode can do most other things as well.

Baking is neither very efficient as it takes more time and energy then other cooking options nor super healthy as the veggies are exposed to lots of heat for a relatively long time which reduces some vitamins. It can be tasty though.

@Nilsi I prefer my IKEA-BAG, but I guess everyone has his own style...

I sold most of my fonds. Dont know if its the smartest choice but emotionally its so much better even though I invested just a few pennies. I was looking at my shares multiple times a days being aware that I had no way of knowing whats gonna happen next. I didnt expect to feel such emotional relief from selling them.

A guy in my theatre group just got accepted to an acting school. I always thought that he was incredibly bad at acting. But he just put everything in it and did it. I cant decode my feelings right now but I am guessing there will be some jealousy the future to the degree that I would want to do acting myself which I dont know if I want so that will be interesting.

Reality is a constant war of states of consciousness. States of consciousness wanting to et up other states of consciousness.

A big pill box. I dont take pills but I supplement omega3 a lot and multivitamin and always forgot to take it. In a big box you can super fast just pour all the pills for the week in like dog food and never forget to take it.

@Michael569 Microwaves can do so much. Appearently you can even do scrambled eggs in the microwave very easily even. What couldnt you cook with two microwaves? I will do some digging comparing actual steamer with combi microwave steamer. Having a way to cook veggies fast, comfortable, tasty and healthy is such an worthwhile long term investment. I am not lazy when it comes to eating veg but I am lazy when it comes to cooking them.

I already have an instapot and I rarely use it because its relatively inconveneint for me and the steaming option which is the most important feature for me makes veggies mushy. The minimalist argument is that I dont see a way around a microwave. The ability to heat things up quickly is irreplaceable so I have to built around the microwave. And of course besides steaming the overpriced microwave can also bake, grill, defrost and cook. It only cant airfry. The 200 dollar microwave could do that though.

A have a huge fetish for minimalism and a huge aversion for extra devices that clutter my kitchen. If I get one device that does it all that would be perfect. If I dont buy a steaming microwave I would buy a decently expensive microwave for 200 dollars anyway so its the question if the 300 dollar jump is worthed. Insta pot steaming doesnt work for me because veggies get slushy and its not as convenient because it takes more time and you have to clean the whole pot for a few veggies all the time. Steaming with strainer over pot is unconvenient because it takes time to get the water boiling and you have to set a timer and all of that. But super inexpensive so I could try it to see if I would actually steam often. So long term it would likely either be a 200 dollar microwave and a steamer or a 500 dollar microwave with steamer. How is steaming with a steamer like compared to steaming with a microwave (actual steaming microwave though) ? Where is more cleaning required ?

A strainer over pot is way less convenient though compared to a steaming microwave where you just put it in and it will finish on time. I will probably steam veggies my whole life. Instapot steaming doesnt work well for me, the veggies end up slushy.

👆 This is exactly what I had in mind. It comines ingenuity with spiritually lovey dovey. But I dont even feel that much of a drive to do this. WHY!?