Jannes

Researching more on remote viewing. Oh man this brings me back so much. You know I had a phase where I believed a lot of nonsense and couldnt make a difference at all between bullshit and truthful things and recognizing this in this wave I threw away remote viewing with it. The person I would book the course from has a youtube channel. This is a real example of how they do remote viewing: This might be important as well: On the channel are some very long sessions and a few tutorials. I will definitely watch all the smaller videos and some of the longer. I am a bit tired from research and need to get some air. Read to "Entscheidungsfindung & Optimum" on the website and will continue when I took a break or maybe tommorrow. I also want to research other people offering this. Reminder: I am doing researching to find out the validity, how useful and how much money you can make with it and to get the most out of the first session. I dont have a plan yet on which course I actually want to take.

When I am in touch with myself these two strenghts seem to stick out: I am incredibly calm, its insane. I am very interested in intuitively figuring out where inauthenticity lies, so where inner conflict is and trying to understand people in that. I am made to be some kind of psychologist with these traits basically. Also in the self help group yesterday something interested happened. I suddenly had a shift in my awareness and found two 29 year old women there pretty attractive. I suffered quite a lot the last weeks because I realized how much opportunities I lost. I am in my mid twenties, so all in all still young and attractive but I still wasted years and opportunities with other people in their early twenties. So I knew that I needed to find older people attractive at some point and somehow that just clicked and the two girls became much more attractive to me then before. Not sure what happened there but its pretty cool.

Even though I cant flirt and built vibe, I dont know how to turn things into sex. I am not whole because of that weakness and my confidence will be diminished because of it in some way.

I felt a lot more relaxed and emotionally well rounded from archieving something today. I also noticed that I lack confidence because I dont get much done which I want to compensate for with a particularly attractive gf for example.

So on the remote viewing website there is lot to read. I really want to book the first session to get the foot in, I think it makes a lot of sense to read through all the other stuff, to make more detailed questions which bring me forward.

The body doubling thing really works wonders. Two and a half hour of work and I feel exhausted. Not used to working.

No guarantees When you realize nothing in life is a guarantee, so you spread your chances and maximize each one, you come as close to a guarantee as possible. So basically the more you think that nothing is guarenteed the more likely you are to find a guarentee, thats the balance. And there is something interesting to add. The thought of getting a guarentee stems from you recognizing your own potential and thinking, "will all of these grounds, something has to grow out of that it is guarenteed." But when you remaind there and slack off nothing will happen. But when you do the process of trading the potential into the manifestation of that potential that potential will bite just as much as you thought about your potential in theory. But it's interesting, the person that thinks that there are no guarentees and therefore is close to a guarentee doesn't recognize that they are having a guarentee. You can only have it when you don't have or don't have it when you have it. This touches on an observation I made before which is about 'the more you give it away the more it comes back'. No kewl person ever thinks of themselves as kewl, no good person ever thinks of themselves as good, ...

So there is the option for a short talk session for remote viewing where you learn about the field and so on. This is my chance to ask questions and put on the bullshit detector, I need to get a good check before I buy any courses. The great thing about remote viewing would be that it implies that the old physical paradigm is outdated and it would open the door for integrating more spirituality. So that would be quite something, being a Yedi-trainer lol. IF it works (AAAAh). Questions I want to ask: Can you earn money with remote viewing? How many clients do you have? Can I work as a remote viewing teacher and earn money doing that? How can I test if remote viewing works before I buy any courses? -> can you locate x-thing for me? (to check wether or not it works) hmm what would I want to hide, thats the golden question.

My mind isnt quite sorted, which eats away from my productivity. I am researching ergotheraphy but when remote viewing, how unlikely it may be, could be an option to earn money with, there is no way I am going for ergotheraphy. Same with acting. Although I dont know if acting is good for me, in a sense I am healing quite now being away from acting. As long as you do acting there is always a part of you ready to bullshit. When you are out of that zone and people relate to you in a certain way, you know they are more authentic. But quite honestly acting produced some of my happiest times. But when you act you always act in the human domain, even when acting as an alien, as the alien is not really an alien but humans imagination of an alien. But I know that for sure, remote viewing is high on the mood list. So I make it a high priority: Researching remote viewing > researching acting? > researching ergotheraphy > researching what can be done with my study progress so far

I am in an online body doubling group again which seems to help. I think I need like at least a week to tell if it works or doesnt work.

I do feel emotionally more grounded and healthy and I actually find more motivation for the things I previously could tell intellectually would connect to my values but somehow I didnt feel motivated towards them. Now I feel a bit more motivated towards them. Like working at Rick&Morty studio. Maybe I could create a portfolio with a shitton of ideas and they hire me.

Just took a look into this. Disorganized attatchment style kinda fits me. I actually remember one of the moments in my childhood when I was like "oh yeah the way I survive is to hold connections very loosely, I have to be able to go all in fast but be prepared to let it go in an instant when I get betrayed."

Beyond that you would be one of the few people who would try it out early on, so you would get an early sense and vision where society is headed and how that would feel like.

Talked to a girl yesterday at my social spot. It was werid, I already talked to her another time, this time I was so cold in terms of small talk and we had such an akward small talk but somehow it just kept going on and she didnt seem to mind that much, as if this akwardness was normal. She waved to me when leaving as well. But people at the social spot seem to look at me differently, at least a few individuals distance themselves from me. I dont know why, maybe because I express to much Fuckboy energy. Well I just talk to every attractive women there is. But its interesting flirting is easier for me then socializing at a normal paste because the latter isnt as stimulating for my mind so I suck at it. Which is why I cant really get love from friends because building friendships is so hard for me. But of course they think if I can go up and talk to attractive women then he could have easily been friends with me but chose to ignore me instead. But my mind is just wired differently. I still feel like an outcast while at the same time being able to flirt. I have to dig deeper into finding adhd people, the self help group brought me together with maybe one handfull of people my age over all this timeframe, I need to find more people with adhd.

These guys are heroes! I cant think of many things more impactful then making the future technology more accessible for everyone. But it would be interesting if they really manage to built robots that beat the big companies, other bots can do backflips and have strong sensitivity in their robot hands, that would be hard to replicate. But maybe they are just that talented and its like Linux beating Windows before Windows became the standard, I would hope so.

I guess there are many women who want to built a family, are more experienced and are skilled at picking out exactly the kind of guy they could do that with. So when you present yourself, that could be your chance. But its important to socialize, date, whatever you can to get more experience to have more self-efficacy. You need resources of course to built a family, so you would need to elaborate where you stand.

I have seen such depraved behaviour from girls in the last couple of years. Maybe I wrote about this already, not sure. There is nothing spiritual, holy and romantic about human connection, everybody is trying to maximize their value. At first when I saw a girl wanting to cheat or leave her bf for another guy I was like 'how dare you', but now that I have seen so much of it with basically no case of a holy bond, I feel like I am playing a different game entirely. I am considering lowering my moral standards. Like if I really want somebody and built a connection with this person and later find out that they are in a relationship but they are willing to take me instead then I am not sure if holding back is the right thing to do. Yeah this is trading sex, fame, power for truth.

I am writing with a girl atm and even though the conversation is pretty wholesome somehow I dont really get much out of it. Like even though I tell myself I am lonely this conversation just bores the shit out of me, or I cant take the feeling of connection or this is a new thought I try to make connection work but my mind doesnt create enough dopamine from simple talk so it takes me some time of collecting to respond to a message. It also got me thinking at the gym today, I try to be moral and all but I do have a primal part to myself, if I am not aligned to a significant degree with my devil/ primal side I just loose interest just like it just wasnt possible to logik myself into befriending the nice guy when I didnt really respect him. So when I have nice talk with this girl but know that I could be a Fuckboy if I really wanted to maybe this beta nice guy talk wont get support from my primal brain. If I had no other option then sure this is the best I got and I could settle peacefully but it doesnt seem so.

I kind of knew but somehow never looked at it, maybe because I was uncomfortable with it but there are many online body doubling websites especially for ADHD folks! This could be a great tool to make me more productive. Will check it out tomorrow, today I basically got nothing done.

In a sense all the insights I made during the Fusion are more valueable because it was out of my trance and from a higher state of consciousness because I needed to be conscious all the time without distraction.

I felt really good in the morning. One of the reasons is because I was forced to be conscious all the time at the event. Well of course I would distract myself with dancing and stuff but I was there and in my body. Peter Ralston talks about it that you become more conscious when you are physical because you at least experience actual reality. This is why studying feels so bad for me, or why doing something where I am involved directly would feel so much better. I did this mini job at the super market and while I did hate it I remember how much I processed shit because I always needed to be in the moment, undistracted by other things. I miss my shitty job, it actually gave me some emotional stability. So a qualification could be way better then studying for my mental health. Just bought myself a crochet set for beginners.

Oh I think he is super on point with most stuff, but he is no psychonaut.

Haha the dude with down syndrome was so oblivious that he broke your paradigm, I can really picture that. We give ourselves similiar affection with body contact, nice gestures, scratching our hair and heads even.. but the owner of the pet is usually on another league intelligence wise which explains why he has a pure owner to pet relationship to his pet while there is no good reason to treat most humans that way but of course there are power inbalances, simple minded people with simple jobs who are told what to do.. I think we also spare a lot of affection to each other because of lack of development.

No your anus.