Jannes

Oh yeah, I always found the force strong in homeless bottle collectors.

Never watched it with the translation. 4:57

When I think about why I want to do acting, its because of THAT. I would have loved to play her exploding from anger. Expressing such intensity. Great voice lines, I think there is some potential to express her anger in that moment more creatively. But really I am just building on top of the foundation that this show has created, they did a good job.

A lot of unproductive thoughts come up as soon as I dont take my adhd medication.

Also I partially dont have a Plan B. I am too old to get accepted to an acting school.

I checked out the WhatsApp Group of my old theatre club yesterday, in particular the pictures of the members. I am finally taken out. The old theatre club still has such a massive grip on me emotionally though. I have so much anger. I knew I couldnt look at the emotional pain of the loss of the old theatre club straight because I needed to protect myself emotionally. I had so much love for this place, looking at the reality that all my dreams crashed and that I will never have it is just too much to accept. Maybe thats why I cant let go off my anger.

Its raining. Maybe a blessing in disguise .. LESS PEOPLE

classic

RV feels pretty hard, maybe because of that. Whenever I have something on my mind it makes spiritual practice very hard to impossible.

Going to the social spot will be though today. Chances arent low someone will confront me. But I need to fight for my spot there.