Flint

Would you actually have any tips for guys who struggle to detach their self-worth from how attractive/desirable they feel to women ? I imagine to some extent it's normal to feel good whenever you're liked and you're desired, but then ideally none of your self-worth as a man would be linked to how well you perform with women. Basing your entire self-worth on it is another thing entirely of course, but regardless society always telling you that you're worth is how much you earn and how hot of a girl you can get doesn't really help in that regard. Would love to hear your thoughts on this.

Around 1:30:00 in the video you mention the dichotomies and distinctions that are made by language e.g. men vs woman and the fact that postmodernim would consider one social construct dominating the other and that those dichotomies should be undone. But isn't that essentially a value judgement of one social construct/idea/concept being better than the other ? The fact that one part of a dichotomy is dominant or superior over another is relative to a certain society or a certain point of view. So aren't Post modernists being biaised in saying that the dichotomy should be undone because they either say it relative to the idea of every perspective being equal in the abstract or in practice deconstructing a certain power structure those duality enforce in a specific society ? Even the statement that one part of the duality is dominant compared to the other is very relative.

@Leo Gura Are you using DALLE-2 or Mindjourney or ?

I'm calling it now, it's going to be a job in the future. Basically you could design a anime or manga based on AI simply with prompts with each pannel after giving the AI some more or less complete visual information on your characters. You could afterwards correct panels manually and use them as reference for training as well. So the AI prompt generation will be way faster as well. It would just become a writing job instead of a drawing one. This will save an enormous amount of time for any entretainement such as anime, manga and video games. It's just crazy. Of course every anime studio will have their own writers and Ai engineers for that purpose. Anyone doing a AI with animation capabilities as a SAAS will get billions richs. It will be the future SAP of the entretainment industry.

@Razard86 Just make a shroom tea. Grind the mushrooms into a fine powder and add into hot but not boiling water and let it steep while stirring occasionally. Some people prefer to make it into a pot but don't heat them for too long. Afterwards, filter and discard the flesh itself and keep only the infused water, like you would do with tea. I also add ginger and mint, infuse that ritualistic mixture for a while and then filter and drink it.

Credits of this image please ? It's stunning

I would keep both things separate. Tell your therapist why you think you need psychedelics when visiting her and discuss that and other things related to why you thing therapy is not doing it for you. Then, on the side, as a separate practice, take psychedelics and talk about it in therapy if needed, but don't do both at the same time.

@Loba Thanks for your very mature response. You shouldn't expect men to overcome their lust in the same way that you should not expect people to be able to deny or overcome their desires somehow. I hope you find a way to heal your insecurities and that you find a great man you're compatible with. You always could date someone very christian who thinks that porn and masturbation are evil which of course has other disadvantages. Someone into Nofap and semen retention perhaps ?

There is a big difference between being uncomfortable and trying to prevent someone from doing something and threatening to leave over it. What needs to be understood is that porn is imaginary and the man or the woman is having imaginary pleasure, vs the real pleasure that is had with a real partner. In porn, there is no true reality of another human being, all of those actors in porn movies are of course people and exist but it's not human to human interaction. One could stimulate him/herself only with the mind by imagining certain scenarios or reading erotica. So the having a lot of male friends is not a valid comparison as those are real people. As a guy would you forbid your girlfriend to read erotica or romance novels for instance ? I wouldn't because it sounds absurd. You can't really extrapolate that it means he desires to have sex with other women but you kinda can so I understand the point. And of course, he will always have desire for sexual intercourse with other women who are not you. It's just something you need to accept. It's very naive to believe you would be able to pleasure and satisfy a man to such a perfect extent that he would cease any sexual desire towards any other woman. It's simply not realistic. In the same way, how would you feel if your man forbid you from reading romance novels or any sort of erotica fiction ? What if he told you you were a traiterous monster for watching Bridgerton because you should be perfectly satisfied with the love he's giving you and you should not be imagining falling in love with someone else ? Would you not run away immediately ?

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@Adam M Based on what do you think she's yellow or turquoise ? She's not acting like someone developped at all. Turquoise you can throw out of the window immediately and stop idealizing her. What is the actual reason of her not liking you watching porn ? Because I can't find a good conscious reason for that. It seems that it's somehow deeply tied to her survival agenda if she's so deeply hang up on it. Does she have some trauma and does not like you desiring other virtual girls ? Are you not having enough great sex ? The deal is you cannot really say it's her boundairy, because it's something she would have established right away, as in : Oh I will not date someone who watches porn, sorry, is this currently something you're doing ? Yes ? Okay this is not going to work bye. if she's violating her boundairies retroactively that's on her. At present, I cannot understate how manipulative her stance of "you have to stop watching porn or I will leave you" is. The problem is, is that if you comply with it and she ignores your interest in the matter she simply does not have your best interest at heart, and once she knows she can make you comply with that, she could make compliant with pretty much anything and will over time domesticate you. It's a very controlling stance and it's not as reasonable of an expectation for instance as "I expect you not to cheat on me and if you do I will leave you". Is she controlling in any other way ? Her behaviour indicates that she's absolutely not worthwhile as a girl.

Ah, certainly. Altough I can imagine someone making them out of fun for the pure irony of it.

I know it's meants with very hostile intent but the meme's are actually quite funny if you don't take them seriously.

It's pretty much always the same story, a guy wants to have better social social skills and to have a nice girlfriend and at the same time never does any actual work to change and allow it to happen. This should be a wake up call for you. That's why I think they invented "right action" - you do what is right relative to the result you need to get, regardless of your objections, arguments and how you feel. It doesn't feel natural ? Well though tities you're doing it anyway. It doesn't matter. You don't really have a choice, either you step up and take action or you simply stay miserable. So simply have a longer chat and ask her out. Then have a date and otherwise realize you need to take more action to tackle this situation and do so.

@StaffyDoggo Stop overthinking this or making a big deal out of it. Dating is very harsh and requires you to man up, including doing things you're not comfortable with. If you have not yet destroyed all of your chances by doing nothing while you had already 5 opportunities, you need wake up and lead, so just ask her out for a coffee next time you see her. It's incredible to me that you have not chatted about anything personal after meeting regularly like here she's from, what she does, those kind of things. Just do it and learn from the experience. You can't stay stuck on small things like that forever.

Did you setup an instagram for the social proof to make game easier ? I don't see any other reason, as most of your following is on youtube and you wouldn't engage in instagram for the "fun" of it

@Someone here Quite simple. Are you from the US ? If yes, move to an European country, like a massive city such as Lisbon/Madrid/Barcelona, perhaps Brussels for international english speaking jobs, but still I would recommend to choose based on : - Size : the bigger the better - job opportunities (especially homeworking) - the weather By itself, this will allow you to gain massive experience as you will need to : move, find a job in another country and learn a new language. Next, since you are now in a massive city, do massive amounts of pickup to get laid and find a girlfriend. Also, since you're in europe, enjoy at least 20 paid leave days (sometimes up to 30 and even more if you work 40hours per week) to travel the world. Now, after reading this you most likely already have 20 different objections, similar to how people introduced to pick up have 100's of them - they want that nice girlfriend, don't want to be single and miserable and at the same time don't want to do the work to make it happen. Execution is very hard work and realize that if you don't do something bold like that, you will be stuck with your usual results as 99% percent of people are. Understanding what you have to do is not difficult, the difficult part is actually doing it. Also new experiences don't happen at an abstract theoretical level, but at a real life concrete level : moving countries and having different physical experiences is way more valuable than for instance new ideas from a new book you will forget. You need more constrast. Forget about finding your passion or w/e other abstract thing you will mentally masturbate about for ages, just do more stuff so that you have more experience to understand yourself better.

I would perhaps be a bit more nuanced. It's not your friends so you don't neccessarily have to love all of them nor like all of them either. And if it's damaging influences your boyfriend should be able to descope them by himself, otherwise that's indeed a red flag. In general other parties should not be able to stir up drama in your relationships but that does not warrant that you have to get along/like all of those parties. As long as you don't have them

Do not date nor be exclusive with a girl before having sex with her. She can't be your girlfriend if you're not sleeping with her. Period. That's your first mistake. Then, don't date crazy girls. If she's traumatized so severly she cannot have sex you do not want to deal with that whether it's true or not. Given all of the crazy stuff she's doing for me she's just completely broken and acting out. Run. Erase her from your life and find someone normal.

I would say being stuck in a certain stage of development (looking at you stage orange) and not seeing beyond it and interpreting all of existence according to your current level of development without leaving any alternatives. Interpreting a certain teaching not for itself but trough a biaised certain lens, such as learning buddhism trough a scientific paradigm instead of learning buddhism or any other teaching trough, or the opposite, learning a practical stage orange teaching trough a green spiral dynamic lens. I see this most often with people stuck in stage orange not able to see trough the limitations and the opportunities of the higher stages.

@Vrubel If you meet a girl during the night the best way is to try to pull her the same evening. One night stand style. Don't theorize about numbers from x/y being flakey, it depends. Simply take action, get feedback and fix what you're doing to take even more action. Don't fantasize about girls you've just met, even been on dates with, etc, until you have sex with them. And by that I mean litteraly you are inside them. They can throw random shit tests when you're the most relaxed and unguarded and that will play tricks on you. You need to invest the bare minimum in a girl (including thoughts and fantasies !) and as Leo said get more girls. More more more ! If you're building an actual real connection in real life and you have some chemistry girls will be more than happy to see you again. I think you misunderstand the complete lack of good options that women have in general. Yeah, it might seem that they have a lot of options, but are people that you are not attracted to really options ? Imagine you have a master degree and expect to earn a six figure salary, and all of those shitty jobs with 15k per year salaries are harassing you daily ? Why you considers hundreds of those jobs even a real option ? Of course not. Of course. And of course if girls flake you there are not interested. You should never invest so much upfront. Just go out more if you can't stop thinking about a particular girl. And to re-iterate the point: go out more !

I've done quite some research on coockware and I must say at this stage the healthiest version might be cooking your meat on a wooden stick over a campfire. More seriously though, the following options seems to be healthiest: Stainless steel Iron cast Ceramic Now, the problem is: For stainless steel, it could leech nickel and/or chromium into your food. How big of a risk is that ? How would I select a stainless steel which doesn't do that ? For iron cast there are two points. Pure iron cast does leech a little bit of iron, which you want to avoid the surplus of. Enameled, is it even safe in your experience ? I've read that it can leech lead into your food, so I'm very scared about that one, altough for certains brands it's mentionned that it's only in the exterior because of the paint (e.g. Le creuset) For Ceramic and porcelain it depends because some of their paint seems not to be okay as well. Hence, how did you, ladies and gentlemen, find cookware that was completely free of undesirable side effects ? Any tips ?

I would go for a stainless steel wok. I'll still need to investigate about detoxing chromium and nickel though.

It looks to me like you're just looking for a justification not to do it - trying to dismiss it since it would yield no results. If you're actually working on your game it's basically impossible not to make progress : even on a baby step level, talking to girls vs not talking to girls is a huge step forward. Imagine you've gone from sitting at home to having a 10 minute conversation with a girl at a party ? Good, something to learn here. This is like in the worst absolute case, like if you were a completely unsocialized hard case who has never seen the light of day, if you were able to go through a schooling process you ARE able to learn enough skills, social skills, how to dress, etc. to approach at a party and have a ten minute conversation. Even if it's very awkward at first you have gotten new feedback and experience and you can retrospect on it. Then, once you get other types of feedback, e.g. a kiss, you have managed to create attraction from scratch with a complete stranger. This proves to you directly it can be done. If you put in the work, step by step, it can only be a upwards spiral. Forget about your number of approaches, focus on taking consistent action and introspecting. The rest is noise. Consistent action is the actual difficult part. If you can go out and follow trough the steps you will improve. What should worry you is NOT TAKING ACTION.

But what about Nickel and Chromium ? It's not lead of course, but should we still detox and/or be careful about those ? Carbon steel is annoying because you need to season it so stainless steel is usually more convenient.