Flint

Well as incomplete it might seem it's the only working paradigm for a male to get a female partner of his choosing. There is the alternative of being alone or miserable but that's not great. I'm very sorry, but humanity in dating ? It's ruthless. Like, have you ever been outside ? I'm not sure it's a particularity of stage orange at this point but dating feels very much inhumane. The value proposition always takes precendence over any human consideration because in the early stages of dating all that matters is the value exchange. The human aspects come later. But early on ? You get ghosted, disrespected, ignored, abused and everything in between if your value proposition is not good enough. I very much so wished to be wrong and wished we could evolve towards more conscious dating but it's not how reality operates today. The "human beings" mostly operate as value exchange animals. Which is already good progress over the beige dating scene, which was "male hits female with club, drags her into cave and rapes her".

Would you actually have any tips for guys who struggle to detach their self-worth from how attractive/desirable they feel to women ? I imagine to some extent it's normal to feel good whenever you're liked and you're desired, but then ideally none of your self-worth as a man would be linked to how well you perform with women. Basing your entire self-worth on it is another thing entirely of course, but regardless society always telling you that you're worth is how much you earn and how hot of a girl you can get doesn't really help in that regard. Would love to hear your thoughts on this.

Around 1:30:00 in the video you mention the dichotomies and distinctions that are made by language e.g. men vs woman and the fact that postmodernim would consider one social construct dominating the other and that those dichotomies should be undone. But isn't that essentially a value judgement of one social construct/idea/concept being better than the other ? The fact that one part of a dichotomy is dominant or superior over another is relative to a certain society or a certain point of view. So aren't Post modernists being biaised in saying that the dichotomy should be undone because they either say it relative to the idea of every perspective being equal in the abstract or in practice deconstructing a certain power structure those duality enforce in a specific society ? Even the statement that one part of the duality is dominant compared to the other is very relative.

@Leo Gura Are you using DALLE-2 or Mindjourney or ?

I'm calling it now, it's going to be a job in the future. Basically you could design a anime or manga based on AI simply with prompts with each pannel after giving the AI some more or less complete visual information on your characters. You could afterwards correct panels manually and use them as reference for training as well. So the AI prompt generation will be way faster as well. It would just become a writing job instead of a drawing one. This will save an enormous amount of time for any entretainement such as anime, manga and video games. It's just crazy. Of course every anime studio will have their own writers and Ai engineers for that purpose. Anyone doing a AI with animation capabilities as a SAAS will get billions richs. It will be the future SAP of the entretainment industry.

@Razard86 Just make a shroom tea. Grind the mushrooms into a fine powder and add into hot but not boiling water and let it steep while stirring occasionally. Some people prefer to make it into a pot but don't heat them for too long. Afterwards, filter and discard the flesh itself and keep only the infused water, like you would do with tea. I also add ginger and mint, infuse that ritualistic mixture for a while and then filter and drink it.

Credits of this image please ? It's stunning

I would keep both things separate. Tell your therapist why you think you need psychedelics when visiting her and discuss that and other things related to why you thing therapy is not doing it for you. Then, on the side, as a separate practice, take psychedelics and talk about it in therapy if needed, but don't do both at the same time.

@Loba Thanks for your very mature response. You shouldn't expect men to overcome their lust in the same way that you should not expect people to be able to deny or overcome their desires somehow. I hope you find a way to heal your insecurities and that you find a great man you're compatible with. You always could date someone very christian who thinks that porn and masturbation are evil which of course has other disadvantages. Someone into Nofap and semen retention perhaps ?

There is a big difference between being uncomfortable and trying to prevent someone from doing something and threatening to leave over it. What needs to be understood is that porn is imaginary and the man or the woman is having imaginary pleasure, vs the real pleasure that is had with a real partner. In porn, there is no true reality of another human being, all of those actors in porn movies are of course people and exist but it's not human to human interaction. One could stimulate him/herself only with the mind by imagining certain scenarios or reading erotica. So the having a lot of male friends is not a valid comparison as those are real people. As a guy would you forbid your girlfriend to read erotica or romance novels for instance ? I wouldn't because it sounds absurd. You can't really extrapolate that it means he desires to have sex with other women but you kinda can so I understand the point. And of course, he will always have desire for sexual intercourse with other women who are not you. It's just something you need to accept. It's very naive to believe you would be able to pleasure and satisfy a man to such a perfect extent that he would cease any sexual desire towards any other woman. It's simply not realistic. In the same way, how would you feel if your man forbid you from reading romance novels or any sort of erotica fiction ? What if he told you you were a traiterous monster for watching Bridgerton because you should be perfectly satisfied with the love he's giving you and you should not be imagining falling in love with someone else ? Would you not run away immediately ?

??

@Adam M Based on what do you think she's yellow or turquoise ? She's not acting like someone developped at all. Turquoise you can throw out of the window immediately and stop idealizing her. What is the actual reason of her not liking you watching porn ? Because I can't find a good conscious reason for that. It seems that it's somehow deeply tied to her survival agenda if she's so deeply hang up on it. Does she have some trauma and does not like you desiring other virtual girls ? Are you not having enough great sex ? The deal is you cannot really say it's her boundairy, because it's something she would have established right away, as in : Oh I will not date someone who watches porn, sorry, is this currently something you're doing ? Yes ? Okay this is not going to work bye. if she's violating her boundairies retroactively that's on her. At present, I cannot understate how manipulative her stance of "you have to stop watching porn or I will leave you" is. The problem is, is that if you comply with it and she ignores your interest in the matter she simply does not have your best interest at heart, and once she knows she can make you comply with that, she could make compliant with pretty much anything and will over time domesticate you. It's a very controlling stance and it's not as reasonable of an expectation for instance as "I expect you not to cheat on me and if you do I will leave you". Is she controlling in any other way ? Her behaviour indicates that she's absolutely not worthwhile as a girl.

Ah, certainly. Altough I can imagine someone making them out of fun for the pure irony of it.

I know it's meants with very hostile intent but the meme's are actually quite funny if you don't take them seriously.

It's pretty much always the same story, a guy wants to have better social social skills and to have a nice girlfriend and at the same time never does any actual work to change and allow it to happen. This should be a wake up call for you. That's why I think they invented "right action" - you do what is right relative to the result you need to get, regardless of your objections, arguments and how you feel. It doesn't feel natural ? Well though tities you're doing it anyway. It doesn't matter. You don't really have a choice, either you step up and take action or you simply stay miserable. So simply have a longer chat and ask her out. Then have a date and otherwise realize you need to take more action to tackle this situation and do so.