Falken

I can relate to you in many many ways @Huz88, especially about the alienation regarding parents and friends. This has lead me to many depressive episodes as well but something inside me always tells me that this is what I really want to pursue to the extent that i would probably never give up the search because that would be boring and depressing in itself. When I'm talking about the search I don't just mean enlightenment but the spiritual path as a whole, finding my inner child, etc.

This is interesting. I get this too sometimes, especially when i tried strong determination sits I sometimes have to stop because I have a feeling of being stuck into my body that somehow weighs hard on to my mind as well. This used to happen while regularly meditating too but it got much better over time, maybe it's just something you have to get used to and let go over time.

Just watched Leo's video about it again. You can do it both sitting in a chair or in lotus position, just as long as you sit completely still. When you are used to lotus or half-lotus u could do it that way but otherwise a chair is fine.