Mixcoatl

Thanks for the response, bro. The truth is that all these things are hard for me to integrate. The little I’ve been able to integrate from my experience with Bufo has been so mind-blowing that I can’t even digest it — I can’t even believe it when I’m sober. It scares me a bit to reach higher levels of consciousness.

I’ve been working with 5-MeO-DMT (Bufo) for the past two years, slowly deepening my connection with it. But my last trip was on a whole different level. For the first time, I experienced what I can only describe as my own death. Not a symbolic one. I was gone. There was no body, no thought, no "me". Only eternity — endless presence. Stillness. Infinity. I had touched something similar before through meditation, or so I thought. But now I realize this was the real thing. And yet… even in the midst of that absolute dissolution, something strange happened. I remembered I was human. I had memories — vivid ones — of my family, my life, my name. But they didn’t feel real. They felt like images, floating within that eternal field. Like echoes inside a dream that I was finally waking up from. And that’s where my question begins: If I truly dissolved, If I truly died, If I truly became the Absolute... Why did memory remain? Why was there still a thread tying me to my human identity? Is there a level beyond — one where even memory disappears? Where there’s nothing left but pure Being, without a trace of narrative? And my second question: Why do I come back to this same story? Why this human narrative again? What is sustaining this return to the illusion of continuity? Is this identity just a habit of consciousness… or is there more to it? Is my body kept somewhere while I'm "tripping"? Much love.

@Max1993Makes even less sense. But I agree! Let me just integrate into my experience. thank you

I've been contemplating something that's been bugging me lately. If there's only now, if reality unfolds solely in this eternal present, then how the hell can we perceive pitch — which depends on frequency, and frequency is defined across time? I’m not questioning that pitch exists — we all experience it. I’m questioning how it arises if there's no true passage of time, just a single ongoing now. It seems paradoxical. Here are two possible directions I’ve been considering: Now isn’t a point in time — it's the entire axis. Maybe the “now” includes a span of events — not sequentially, but as a kind of timeless pattern or structure. In that case, pitch could be a perceptual property of this structure. Pitch is a qualia-like phenomenon. Just like we perceive redness or the scent of cinnamon without understanding their physical foundations in full, maybe pitch arises directly in consciousness, and its apparent dependency on time is just a correlation — not causation. I’d love to hear how others see this. Especially from those into phenomenology, neuroscience, or metaphysics. How do you reconcile the perception of temporal phenomena like frequency with the claim that only the present exists?

@Princess ArabiaConfirming what you've said before: This forum is for the weirdos

This explains a lot. It’s such a strange thing to grasp—if it can even be grasped at all. I’m starting to think it’s not really about understanding with the mind, but about experiencing it directly. There were moments where I felt like I had touched some kind of truth… like I had reached a glimpse of “enlightenment.” But now, I realize: that was just the beginning. The path ahead is still long—maybe infinite—and I’m just starting to walk it with open eyes. Thanks for the time and your explanations. I really appreciate them. On this matter—if I may—I’d say it doesn’t imply duality. Experience doesn’t need an “other” to be experienced. Experience experiences itself. That’s one small truth I can speak of, not from theory, but from direct knowing.

You didn't even read the topic.

Your comment made me LOL. Because certainly it's the same question.

Alright, let me rewrite the question — crystal clear: I get non-duality. I resonate with it. I’ve seen it, I’ve been it. I understand there’s no such thing as time. Everything arises in nowhere, in no-time. That’s clear to me. A picture can appear without time. A flavor, a color, an emotion — they don’t need a timeline. They just pop into awareness. But what about a vibration? What about a song? A vibration demands change. It is change. And change implies a before and an after — some sort of transition. And that, by definition, sounds like time. Now, I know what you’ll say: “The past isn’t happening. It’s just memory. Just imagination. Just illusion.” And I agree with that — 100%. But here’s the paradox that keeps punching me in the chest: If the past state of a vibration isn’t real, If only the present state of it exists, Then how can something like a vibration exist at all? Why do we hear movement — pitch, oscillation, fluctuation — when the very structure of vibration relies on something that supposedly doesn’t exist? You get it?

I get everything you’re saying about dreams — really, I do. It reminds me of that analogy Rupert Spira uses about Mary and Jane... Everything that appears is in nowhere and in no time, yes, so far we agree. I logically understand that time doesn’t exist. And it’s not just theory: I’ve experienced the eternal NOW firsthand — with LSD, with Bufo. Those moments are undeniable. And I appreciate the full explanation. Really. But here's the thing — here's the core of what won’t let me sleep: How the fuck do vibrations exist if there’s no time? when I hear a sound, it is always accompanied by a vibration, for any crazy reason. I can verify it in an oscilloscope. Any kind of vibration — not just sound, not just scientific definitions — any vibration implies change. And for change to happen, doesn’t there have to be time? But time doesn’t just not exist — it’s not even an illusion. It’s just... not there. That’s the wall I keep crashing into. You say, “things are just appearing and happening.” But then you also say, “how could that happen without there being time and space? It never really happened” Wait... what? So I never existed as a kid? But I’m here now? And when the experience of me as an old man appears... will this version of me never have existed from that perspective? Maybe I need to keep digging. Maybe I’m missing something. But from where I’m standing right now, vibrations feel undeniable. Change feels undeniable. You shake a table and you will feel the effect of that vibration in your hands. Even if time’s not real, something is shifting. And that something is messing with me. It's not as easy as saying: "nothing exists and that thing about frequencies and vibrations are just narratives appearing in imagination" Sorry if I’m being stubborn. But this goddamn question has been haunting my mind for way too long.

Then. the now is all the times joint together in the same thing called now, right? That's the core of my question. what the hell is NOW? is it more fundamental than the "screen"? NOW is the same thing as consciousness? how do you know all the frequencies exist at the same time? Sorry for asking this question but I can't grasp that idea.

This is absolutely mind-blowing. Yesterday in my bufo trip, I was totally convinced that space and time appear as the same thing. I was also convinced that I am every experience I was experiencing. however, I think I still can't grasp "THE THING". I need to smoke more Thanks for your words

I love your logic and it fits the experience of living the present moment: past is just a thought, not the actuality. However, your logic is circular: Time doesn't exist -> hence, nothing can exist -> hence, time and space cannot exist. The thing that blows my mind is when someone says "nothing happened". Yesterday I smoked 5-meo and sounds certainly happened!! The same today. Vibrations exist and by definition, they imply CHANGE of a state. I half agree with you.

Alright folks, I’m not denying that the qualia I’m experiencing is happening right now, raw and direct. That’s not in question. But let’s not dismiss the patterns and correlations we constantly perceive by waving them off as “just stories” — like some pseudo-science fairytale. The truth is, there are correlations. When you hear a sound, there's usually a vibration involved. And yes, that vibration is also a kind of qualia — another flavor of experience. But here's the kicker: vibration implies change. And change implies time. That’s where my question punches through: I’ve touched the eternal now — I’ve been there — but what the hell is that “now”? To me, the “Now” isn’t some razor-thin slice on a timeline. It’s not a damn point. I think the Now is the entire axis. The whole thing. Forget the sound for a second. Here’s the real question: How the hell does a phenomenon — a form of qualia like vibration — even appear, if it seemingly requires time to unfold? I mean, if everything is happening in the eternal now, how does something that needs change over time even show up in experience? That’s the paradox I’m stuck with.

This is absolutely amazing. I find beauty in such things as numbers. thanks

Been thinking about it What is a number? where are they? are they an illusion? is 1 apple 2 things when cut?

LOL

It’s not healthy at all. It’s actually very psycho-addictive—contrary to what a lot of hippies like to say. I quit weed for many reasons: it scatters your mind, turns you into a chronic procrastinator, and makes everything that should matter feel like it doesn’t. Your priorities just dissolve.

Science often invokes the concept of emergentism (don't know if this is the right word in english)—both strong and weak—to explain how the organization of parts gives rise to properties that the parts themselves don't possess. Take water, for example: liquidity doesn’t reside in individual hydrogen or oxygen atoms. It's only when they’re arranged in a particular way that this quality emerges. Or consider a clock: its ability to tell time is not found in any single gear, but in the systematic arrangement of all its components. I agree with the idea of emergence—but not in the way science typically frames it. Because liquidity, and even “telling time,” are mental constructs perceived by a conscious being. And if we truly follow the logic of emergentism, then we must also accept that matter itself is emergent—from subparticles. For centuries, the atom was considered the fundamental building block of reality. But if we’re consistent, the atom is just as much an emergent phenomenon as the "time" displayed on a clock. There’s no essential difference between an atom and the hour a clock tells. Both arise from structured interpretation.

This whole forum is for weirdos. hahaha

Yes, wtf!! I can't fully grasp it!

@Reciprocality The agency that holds the number is a mind, I understand. I'ts very abstract the idea! thanks

@Yimpa beautiful

Being isolated can be also harmful. I've been isolating myself for long and I think i'm starting to get crazy. Moderation is important.

Don't pay attention to them! There's people (not only skeptics) that just want to be right bc they only repeat without being sure of what they are saying. skepticism is ok but first you have to be skeptic on your beliefs.