Ayham

This is me.

@Aiwass thats insightful. Damn!! dmt and shrooms at 15! That's amazing, I would like to know how it has effected you or changed you? I see, the biggest thing limiting me is my country, Iraq.

Leo takes a tough love approach, which is important for any type of mentor or teacher, since it toughens the person instead of inflating ego. It is his personality and not everyone can take that. I do believe that there needs to be a balance, more love and compassion (as "new agey" as that may sound lol), which Leo is lacking especially on the forum.

@Aiwass you mean the embodiment of insights is harder than getting it? well, my top value is wisdom, and for me wisdom also includes embodiment and taking action. and yeah, I certainly have a tendency to make rules and stick to them, or make rigid schedules, or follow recipes to the letter, I am not naturally spontaneous but I do know that spontaneity is a quality of a self actualized person. So you mean following rules will make me not dissolve any boundaries and stick to my comfort zone?

@Yimpawill contemplate this question, thank you kind stranger.

@Thought Art good question to contemplate, added to the list. in fact it seems to me that it might be the most important.

@Leo Gura very motivating, will do. @Yimpa you mean in the "everything is god", "i am god" and "everything is one" sense? like non duality? I still haven't reached any type of awakening, but I am very much looking forward to.

@Leo Gura Oh yes, I know this feeling man, it is what pushes me to try to develop myself more. Aha, so a mix of theory plus contemplation plus understanding one's own ego and self deception, great! also, I found meditation, even after a year of daily commitment is not matching my expectations, am I doing something wrong or is progress in something like meditation painfully slow? I start with concentration practice for 5 minutes, then 20 minutes "see, hear, feel", and sometimes "do nothing" instead. I definetly have a very deep passion for understnading reality, but not settling for the words of humans is very challenging, I can see how important this is, will give it my full attention Leo. This also means I won't settle for what you are saying. I very much appreaciate your answer, I was in a state of overwhelmingness with all the practices I could be doing and all the knowledge out there. I will focus on the essentials all the way until I finish college, which are those, plus meditation, health (exercise and healthy diet), and finding my life purpose. And as much as I dislike being this emotional, but you changed my life Leo, I won't go in the details, but it is not in a small way, and I would even go to say that I started seeing you as a father figure since I didn't have a father figure growing up, I always hear your voice in my head lol, I found you when I was 15 last year, and I watched all the videos in the start here section and started implementing the stuff in "advice for highschool and college students". I won't forget you man.

@Mu_ Yeah i kinda lost connection with friends and people in the last 1.5 years, but since I am introverted, it hasn't effected me much, I also have an idea about my life purpose, but it's not solid. and yeah, it's been impossible to find people with similar interests locally, especially here in Iraq. @Eternal Unity I have done that before, he ignored me lol .

@Mu_ I have been doing all of that and more for more than a year now on a daily basis (except psychedelics because it's illegal here and I am too young for it). Yes there is growth I would say, but it's nowhere as much as I want. I have vowed to continue this lifestyle up until I die, and I won't stop, but I want to know if this is enough to bring me to where I want. I appreciate your answer, mu.

Thinking i am not doing enough and lacking self esteem.

Share how you meditate!

Read the book "how to read a book" by Mortimer J. Adler.

@Bob Seekerwill do

This is just a vent post, nothing useful here, it's more like a cringey journal entry. Today I met someone at school who makes me feel like a useless loser, I feel like I haven't done anything worthwhile. He is very smart, ranked the first in an IQ test we took. His hobby is studying college physics for fun (since he was 11). He plays the violin. Knows 2 programming languages. Speaks English fluently. He is an extremely charismatic introvert, who's very calm and mature, and has high levels of self esteem and he's a leader when he wants to be. and that's only the stuff I asked him about, he probably has other stuff. While I, have nothing to show for myself, yes I read books, I meditate, I eat healthy and exercise, but all of these are soft skills, not helpful for the "real world", and my personality is just me being goofy 24/7, opposite of being mature. I have been struggling to even find my life purpose, I think it's about contributing wisdom to the world somehow, but I am not clear on the domain of mastery, but then again, I have been interested in self actualization topics since I was 12, so I don't know if this is a sign that it's true to me, or a sign that I haven't tried enough stuff to choose. Next year will be my senior year in high school, my goal currently is to learn web development so I can support myself to study abroad since I don't wanna remain in my country (Iraq), yet my parents are against this and want me to stay and support them since this is the norm here. I have had the illusion of doing good for a long time, I needed the awakening that I am not doing enough If I fail to learn web development, I am fucked, I will have to go the hard way to be able to get out of Iraq. Yet there is also school that's taking so much of my time. I think I just need to focus on knowing my life purpose and programming. My life purpose is similar to leo's (even before leo showed his in the course), so maybe I am influenced by him and its not my authentic thing, but maybe it is, I really haven't tried other fields than this, but I have been inclined towards it since I was 12, and I don't have to time to try other stuff right now. For fuck's sake why is this so hard. I am just scared I will fuck up in life and won't be able to live an actualized life, a passionate life and will instead become a wage slave, I want to develop myself to highest degrees possible and I don't want to miss out on that. I think I will have to go with this as my life purpose, and it might change over time, problem is I can't even choose a domain of mastery and its very counter productive to keep changing your domain of mastery. Well then, yes, I will put "seeking understanding to make people wise" as my life purpose, will put my ideal medium as writing (not sure again) and figure out a domain of mastery somehow. For now, I will put all my effort into learning programming, and if I do this successfully, it will make everything so much easier.

1. learn web development (HTML, CSS, and Javascript) 2. learn to drive 3. read 12 books 4. get an average above 90 in school 5. be able to do 100 push ups, pull ups, and squats. i wanted to put meditation too, but i cant really measure meditation and i already meditate so i ignored it.

@Bob Seeker yo wtf that this thing seems like hacking lol. i like the idea, its very new, now i just have to go through the cringe of having a board that i put my dreams on infront of everyone, then it should be easy. and yes, it has been difficult trying to figure it out, even though i am sure of my zone of genius and my impact statement, but i am stuck on the domain of mastery and the ideal mediun. i will need to experiment with more stuff. thank you sir for the dreamboard thing

@Gesundheit2alrighty, now i am excited, thank you so much.

@Gesundheit2 well i can understand this intellectually and see the wisdom in it, but how can i actually embody this and stop comparing? and thanks for your godly motivation, will definitely update you my friend!

@CameronsExploring nice video! motivating. @Gesundheit2@Gesundheit2 i like this photo, nice symbolism. how are you doing btw, i remember you a lot, you were the only person who read my journal here on the forum when i had one, can't help but feel a connection with you lol.

@Michael569 https://fortelabs.com/blog/para/ this has the general idea and its basically a system you can implement in any software, you can use onenote, obsidian (my personal choice) , evernote, notion, etc.

The big picture I am presenting a way to read books that will increase your understanding and comprehension of books to the maximum you can go while not spending too much time, there are 6 steps in this process. internalize the structure of the book and the table of contents First, get an idea of the book, read the back of the book, introduction, etc. then internalize the table of contents, you need to almost have it memorized. Skim the chapter Once you start a chapter you want to go through it quickly by reading the headings, bolded text, and whatever catches your attention, shouldnt take long. Identify main points After skimming, identify the main points in the chapter, these will be propostions of the author, not the arguments, not the examples, not the elaborations. underline these main points and give them a special symbol (a star, a number, etc.) Read the chapter Now, you have the big picture of the chapter, you have the ideas, now you will read for details, read and capture your thoughts on the margins of the book, and also underline other stuff (why you needed the symbol earlier) that give you insights or make you go "aha" Summarize After completing the chapter, summarize it in your own words, use the blank pages after the chapter or at the end of the book if available, before you summarize it, go through the big picture again by rereading the main points underlined. Capture (optional) Make a digital summary in your commonplace book, whether its obsidian, evernote, onenote, notion, etc. "But that takes a lot of time!" Yes i hear your concern. To make up for that, use a speed reading techinque when reading, i am against speed reading since it makes you focus on completion rather than understanding, but if you are doing all this, you need to balance it, and I will give you a good and simple speed reading technique: dont read word to word, group words (3-5 words), and use a pencil while you read (dont move it linearly, move it under each group of words), it might be hard at first, but if you master it you can go through pages extremely fast. But still, dont focus on speed, reading a book a week is a bad idea since you will rememeber nothing and it will not transform you. I personally read a book a month, but i go through it with this process so it is worth it.

@RobertZ yes i get what you are saying, that summarizing might make it hard to start reading since you feel friction. the benefit of summarizing and doing all of this is that once you finish a book this way, you have digested it. the negative can be time spent and maybe it can suck the joy (for me though, i have more fun this way) maybe try to do this only for the best of books?

@Adam M what function might have wisdom and personal growth as their top values in your opinion? @Leo Gura also can you elaborate on taking tests properly? I think your personality can change as in the way you behave, but the cognitive functions as in how your mind approaches things cant be changed. which is why everyone's personality is a unique example of their type, since it determines how your mind works rather than how you behave. and of course, how your mind works also determines how you behave to a high degree.

lol this is so unexpected, everything this world cup is unexpected. who expected Brazil out? Portugal? i think its either France, Argentina, or Morocco who's going to win