Mistico

Hello Tom, first of all, congrats on making this powerful shift in your life. I'm not really so long grassping the nature of enlightment and yet I think I could share some insights with you. 1- Well, I'd say you'll know the answer on your own when the answer will become relevant for you. 2- Isn't a mental masturbation? You can't know because that's not your state now, ask yourself otherwise, might it be a mental flagelation your current state of mind? I'd rather ask myself. You can't understand enlightenment through ego but you do can understand ego through enlightenment. Ego is not the problem, in fact, the arising of the ego was the last evolution of the conciousness state, when an human being was first able to recongnize his face on the water. The problem is your identification with it, the problem is to mistake the map ( your ego ) for the territory ( your true self). 3- There's no contradiction in wanting something, the difference is that now you don't want a girlfriend, travel the world, etc you need it to be happy, that's why this kind of achivements won't make you fullfilled cause you won't solve the problem of neediness by feeding your neediness. Try to understand why you want these things maybe you don't want them or have to find a true egoless reason. 4- This state ends cause you fall asleep again. You leave the present moment, you can know when you are out because you start feeling pain inside and your thoughts take over your attention. Well, I write to you as though I was writing to myself, that was just how I see things now, thanks for sharing your thoughts and forgive me for my level of English.

Hi bro, I know what you feel, I'd like you to watch out for this possible causes. -Porn and masturbation. Don't understimate the importance of this man, it could be the only reason for sexual performance problems. -Being too much in your head, don't try to imagine how good or bad is going to be the intercourse, just be present and try to enjoy yourself at every step, don't focus too much on your couple, contraintuitively she's gonna feel more at ease. -Don't ever believe the past defines who you are. Good luck.

I used to find myself in this situation. Once I gave up dating sites I felt more at peace the same goes with facebook. I think it made me feel in constant look for attention from others and made me doubt myself when other people didn't match my expectations. You don't necessarily have to join me, but understand that you shouldn't be giving your time, attention, energy, etc.. to people that don't give it back to you. Good luck.

I think you are partially right, but women too face this issue. ¨We all need¨ somebody to give us love and in the end nobody gives anything cause we look for love in the outside. The easy thing here is to blame the opposite sex, here we have both feminism and mgtow.

I've recently been thinking of this issue, and man, I'm gone through the same problem myself. Nevertheless, I'm sure we both have stepped forward as If I'm not wrong, before overforcing things we didn't dear to do anything due to self-doubts or fear of rejections, taste that. As far as this ¨paradox¨ goes, maybe we are trying to close something that is not still open. We are rushing the steps, it's much better than doing nothing cause we're being honests, but maybe we are trying to seduce without smelling the roses along the way. To solve that let's try keeping our braveness up while enjoying the proccess. Our problem is no longer a lack of balls, but a lack of detachment of the outcome. Our next goal is to balance this two. What do you think guys?