MatteO22

@mivafofa no worries all good!

Aw thanks ! Can’t say I haven’t thought the same ?.

@ivankiss for real though this is about respecting your ‘no’ and your boundaries. And his unwanted advances should not be tolerated, so Id just say a hard No, and if that’s not respected I’d consider terminating that relationship in the name of self-respect. ps: unless there’s more to the story then he’s certainly, but certainly not sexually assaulting you. Asking for nudes isn’t a criminal behaviour as far as I’m aware, unless you’re a minor… which I think and hope you’re not ? Unless we’re all here being catfished and you’re actually 12.

@ivankiss I’m sorry boo… I’ll stop. I didn’t know it was such a big deal for you… apologies. Byeeee

@Harlen Kelly if you don’t wanna be tagged feel free to use the ‘block function’, if there’s a point in directly calling out destructive rhetoric, gaslighting and abuse I won’t refrain from quoting the things you post, just so that an atmosphere where it’s not okay to speak up isn’t cultivated. So block away, it’s your best option !

Bruh the only harem I need is your mom, your mom been hareming me since before you were born so hard, that I’m prolly your father. …. I hope i didn’t take the joke too far

@Nahm hey that was nice! Thanks!

@kai0 hey, I reported your comment. I just wanna express myself also in case a mod doesn’t do something. To associate women’s clothes with sexual assault is the age old victim blaming strategy. It is such an outdated, abusive patriarchal point of view that it should never be a relevant point in discussions like this.

Ikr, kinda awful to gang up on others… hate that shit. Its not like anyone did that to@Shin thankfully… wait what ? they did ? It was you who did that ? with that ego-maniac @Harlen Kelly? oh fuck ! Didn’t see that one coming. touché. You seem to be so quick to point out the faults you find in others, have you ever tried taking a good hard look at your own behaviour ? I heard it helps. 10/10 dentists would recommend- to watch what comes out of your mouth.

@Valach the distinction between needing someone from a perception of deficiency and simply being attracted to their presence for mutual benefit lies in how you perceive the relationship between the two of you in terms of what is the main focus. - is the main focus of what this person can give me, get me; make me feel more of, make me feel less off ? - or is the focus on desiring to create mutual benefit by interacting together - do you want the things that are good for you and simultaneously probably good for her and vice Versa? Are you excited about this persons little and big victories even if you didn’t play a role in their achievement ? Do you see the well-being of both you as the essence of what needs to happen, or is it more about the well-being of ‘just you’? Or even the well-being of ‘just her’ where you’d be abandoning yourself and leaving yourself out of the equation ? This is the essence of interdependency. The focus is on meeting the well-being of you with the well-being of her. That’s how your relationships stay clean of toxic cycles.

I just wanna say that I agree, the first comment I made regarding the guy ‘sleep humping’ wasn’t meant to somehow justify non-consensual sexual activity when someone is asleep. I was more or less making a joke because I was in a funny mood, but it wasn’t anything of substance. Sometimes I can forget how far people can go to justify abusive behaviour just so they can avoid evolving through their outdated paradigm and experiencing shame, guilt and other uncomfortable feelings. So even if by some you’re being told otherwise, you’re right in what you’re saying regarding sexual assault and consent. The arguments I’ve seen being thrown at you today are just excuses and avoidance of the reality that for many is too vulnerable and uncomfortable.

Journal, and I don’t mean rationally. Take a piece of paper, or a word document and write out your absolute uncensored and brutal preferably foul-mouthed anger. Let it pour through you like your life depended on it - only via keyboard/pen where no-one is being harmed in the process, and you’re being liberated. Rage via writing. It works extremely well when repressed anger comes up. Because via writing nothing needs to be held back. ps, I wouldn’t use the self actualisation journals here, it’s best to delete it usually.

For sure, I was sort of erratically sharing a story I had in my mind that was out of context. Regardless the comment I made was timed unfortunately, I haven’t been reading a lot of the discussion when I made it. I wasn’t even trying to make the point that women can rape too, which is true but maybe a topic for another time. When I made it I was a little all over the place oops! ?? but hey, I’m drowsy from my post covid vaccine symptoms so I get a pass haha

Only betas fuck 6 and bellow. Us big dicked chads will only go for 6.5s and up. The moment a girl is 6.49 (which can be a 6.6 that farts) - I’m outta here bruh. I’m jumping into the chopper and flying to the woods to hunt grizzly bears.

I think you’re dancing on the edge of being an apologist for rapists. Not to sound too dramatic but desire has nothing to do with anything. Were not entitled to have all our desires fulfilled all the time. It’s only when you live in a reality where you feel entitled to your urges being satisfied, what you say will actually have relevance. Even when you say ‘most men restrain themselves’ - as if they were some champions or something. To not have your desires fulfilled all the time is the most basic thing you learn early in life, where it’s much more important to make sure that your desires don’t violate the free will and freedoms of other people, and the moment they do you’re starting to enter the territory of abuse. The priority to respect the free will of another person comes before everything else, thus the fact that men have these urges is not relevant in the given context. That’s the one thing that distinguishes you from an abuser - do I prioritise respect for others over my fleeting desires.