Clabber Girl

This has trust issues written all over it...

The pay for accountants and financial managers is spot on.

I have thought about learning office politics as a sort of social lesson that gives me the opportunity to learn more about human psychology... really just a game. There are only a few men who treat me this way. I really like most women I work with. I am not confrontational or argumentative and I do socialize some but the time wasters or people who blatantly disrespect my time I am getting sick of.

I work in an office as an accountant for a small/midsize property management company. Being that most managers are men, I have gotten some push back in the office after exhibiting behavior that is non-people pleasing... For example: When a male or female co-worker starts talking while I am busy I will keep working and not make eye contact(unless he asks a question rather than demand my attention) When in a group conversation, if the talk is of something I am not interested in or dont value ... I walk away... This has upset some of the upper management and they seem to have a different attitude toward me. I dont eat pizza or order food with the other co-workers and I have been "jokingly" called out for it by my male manager saying "no one likes you here" and "I can see why you wouldn't ask me when ordering food"... Kinda fucked up comment seeing as how the only thing I did was saw no thank you to unhealthy foods I don't want to be rude or hurt other peoples feelings... But I also don't like socializing all the time, and I value a clear mind for my own thinking and processing. And I don't wanna eat shit everyday but its hard when you are in a small office. I like most of the women there but I get a lot of comments and glares from male managers... Is this something I just have to put up with if I decide not to conform with my co-workers?

I hate taking prescription strength ibuprofen... but I have debilitating menstrual cramps to the point I can barely walk when they are at their peak. Also - This is a reason that I dont take birth control for years on end. I dont think long term its best for your hormonal balance or body. A few years here and there ok, I dont know the science but I feel less "natural" on them, if that makes sense. LOL

Live in a different city for 5 years Do an Improv comedy show Cliff jumping into a lake

Don't be too nice too soon. Stand your ground as a man and treat her kindly but make your intentions with her known.

If you surround yourself with other people having fun without alcohol it makes it much more plausible.

All the shy people I know have harbored lots of shame since childhood. The shame may come from trauma or genetics I don't know but that seems to be an underlying theme.

I understand how Leo may not have trauma from his experience .... However the pedo guy could be still molesting other boys to this day and causing trauma for other people. I wonder how he feels about that?

I follow him - I think some of his videos are interesting. I am not into the Keto diet much though so some of his videos dont really appeal to me.

I have been vegetarian for about 7 years... the past 3 I have eaten fish and eggs also to add to my protein intake. I don't really care for nor do i think eating red meat, pork or chicken is really necessary in modern times. There are plenty of cheaper more efficient alternatives now that you can choose. Personally I never really enjoyed pork chops or milk, so vegetarianism or Pescetarianism really goes well with my tastes and lifestyle.

maybe not with the punches to the head for the long term mental health... but you can do a Brazilian jiu-jitsu practice maybe for confidence and a fitness boxing class for exercise.

sometimes sexual fantasies that may include BDSM components could be a part of a woman's innate desire to be dominated, it comes from more of a primal instinct part of the mind.

This is truth... Women know when a man doesn't really love himself.

Falling for the wrong man has its purpose - so that you can learn from your mistakes on that wrong guy and fall for the right man next time! Its perfect in the sense that it is the journey you need to go on before you can identify a great man.

Tim Dillon is a comedian and doesn't always mean what he says literally .. However he has mentioned on the other podcasts he has done that he is following his dreams and he knows that ultimately it will be unfulfilling for him. That following his dreams has been a hard road for him and that most people wouldn't be willing to take the path he did or couldn't survive if they attempted.

I am not a health or fitness guru but I can tell you as a woman I have had the same insecurities with my stomach... A lot of females do. But I think that it is possible to get a flat tummy with diet and exercise. Personally I am not a fan of anyone getting any kind of plastic surgery unless it is for corrective reasons (deviated septum/major trauma to the body due to an accident). If you cant love your body as it is, lipo isn't going to change the way you feel about it. I suspect after the lipo it will be something else you are not happy with. Also - something I have noticed is that all people tend to store fat in specific areas, not every one stores it in the tummy region. For some its the butt/thighs... For me I have seen most of my weight is in my upper body - boobs, belly, arms... Legs and butt are more lean( I have less cellulite too than others I have noticed). It has helped me to come to grips that this is the reality of life and you will have physical appearance strengths and weaknesses. PLAY THE CARDS YOU ARE DEALT, dont fight your body. If you have beautiful eyes, play to that with eye-shadows/liner that complements them. If you have amazing boobs then highlight them... If your legs are toned show those off... the quality of your body is NOT how perfect it is. It's how you are able to play those good aspects to the max. Hell, we are all going to be old and wrinkly one day... Will you then try to get rid of all the wrinkles?

I had two friends that were both assaulted by the same man while drunk a few years ago... They both attended his wedding and were friends with the bride. Never once did they tell her. He was very likable, charming and otherwise an nice, friendly, positive guy to be around. It freaks me out that I could in the past or future be with a man who has sexually assaulted someone before. How can I tell the signs of a man who could be a predator in the past? Also – how do I stop this fear?

Does anyone else have very violent dreams often and if so... Do you think there is a deeper meaning to them? I have had dreams of being exposed to radiation from nuclear bomb blast, being stabbed/murdered, being sexually assaulted, drowning, falling to my death from tall heights. I typically am not doing the crime, and I have not experienced any extreme violence like this in real life. I don't watch violent movies (recently, in the past I have) or play violent video games. This seems to be something deep in my mind playing out violence as symbolic but I am interested to see if anyone else has had this happen?

I would like to get to know a true gentleman but this isn't tinder

@RendHeaven Thanks for the response to my actual question! I appreciate it! I think you bring up a good point about men who show great pride in their past experiences sexually to other women. Makes a lot of sense. But the safety thing is a good thing to keep in mind, as I have dated a man who would comment really weird obscene things to me such as "your getting molested tonight..." WTF. Crossed the line there, and I have told him and he apologized and was never that creepy/weird ever again but needless to say that relationship didnt last. I will give him credit he backed off, apologized and there is something to be said for that type of "social calibration". I think a lot of guys dont have the sense of whats crossing the line and whats considered ok for the girl. Men forget theres a physical power disparity so you cant just do and say what ever you want and we will be ok with it. So for me, the safety boundary really matters.

Woman #1 - drunk, he took her into the bathroom away from people in the middle of the night and forced himself on her from behind behind... I knew something was wrong b/c we shared that bathroom and I heard a commotion but no sounds of sexual pleasure just things being knocked over on the bathroom counter. I asked her about it in the morning kinda annoyed with the loud sounds but she was vague and seemed disturbed... Usually shes is a very talkative woman that is an open book and shares everything. She said its something shes talked with her therapist about and described him as a predator. Woman #2 - sober, with a long term boyfriend he knew about, touched her sexually while asleep and she woke up to it. I have had a similar experience waking up to a guy friends hand up my shirt while on a camping trip. I was so freaked out this guy would be touching me in a dead sleep I froze in fear while he commented on how hot my body was. He then proceeded to put his hand down my jeans that's when I pushed him off and he got out of my tent. These things happen more than some people think so yeah I do consider it when getting out into the dating world again.

I think it's due to societal norms... When you tell a friend or family member how you really love / admire then it can get weird. Men in the states are not really allowed to express their admiration for each other in this way.