Applegarden8

No, you are bliss itself. The moment you tap into it your delusions that suffocate you relaxes.

I feel the best when I am by myself.

I just realized something while watching Latvian prime minister speech for new year. She was talking about Ukrainian war and military service in our country. And that "our men has Latvian identity in their heart" and I realized something Identifying with nationality has been the most efficient tool for governance and also greatest vehicle for ignorance. Every identity like that, your family, nationality, workplace, animals and other labels you identify with you tend to care about and you usually only care for these groups of these people/things. But what if you started to think about identifying with all people or everything in the universe and hold this tought current/constantly remind in your day to day life, you will become in such a way that you can not not care about all people and everything. You are bound to become all inclusive, but we are conditioned so that if "meh, it's not my nationality that has this problem, it's not my company that has this problem, it's not my family that has this problem, it's not me who has this problem", but if you identify with everything, you are bound to be willing to have that emotional backlash and willingness to do something. This is why people become activists. Of course this is just not one component required to have that, but this is a technique how to become that. Nobody wants to do that though usually. Therefore, a lot of the times it's just "it's none of my business or I don't care" and "I don't care" literally means this event is out of scope of things and people I identify as myself. But if you did you are bound to care and bound to do something about it.

Sadhguru also reveals what happens when you live for 4 years, 7 years, 14 years, 21, years, 28 years, 33 years, various karmic cycles and any other number of years he has talked about.

I was waiting for somebody to post about Nithyananda. I will describe my experience with him in few words. No guru to this day has so many techniques and sutras available on the net (Sadhguru maybe being far second), his akashik readings are out of this world (in a good way). He is probably the best guru to turn to today. Why I do not talk about him? I don't want be labeled as weird, cult like etc. and don't want to be involved in the battles he is fighting by association but Nithyananda is one of the most valuable people in my life. Same as some other mystics, but for different reasons. If I will recommend his teachings to someone people will think I am stupid and it will not solve their problems, but things like unclutching, nirbhaya dhyana, samsara daghana kriya, iccha shakti, third eye meditation just works. I tried it. There you have it. Not that I would join him or whatever, but he is very good at what he does.

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Check this out if you have nothing to do this evening. EDIT: I did not realize that it's over...

One thing that can reduce is buy honey and mix it with cocoa powder and some seeds or nuts. This much healthier if you are not diabetic.

Whatever works for you. I find no problem composing completely sober. My problem with people who do drugs is that they endlessly try to convince to use it too. And then they get into problems with police and drag you too. But about what I said that people who smoke weed are lazy and slow, that may not be the case, but I have seen many people who have been like what I am describing, mostly in my childhood. Their words simply do not match their actions.

It is a spectrum where some "events" happen without the other end. In this phenomenon I have noticed that different levels of development for taste of purification happens which correlates with waves of desire and desirelesness, fear and fearlessness and lack of any other feelings other than bliss and Sielence. Some small events come and go spontaneously mostly during meditation like some quantum leap or change of the seat of the soul where your vision becomes infinite and your sense of self expands temporarily, it's like you can't tell where your experience of life is located. Lack of dreams is a good sign. Bliss in the vishuddi, anja, sahasrara is a good sign, that a positive change towards that is gradually happening. Sometimes lack of neuroticism will also tell you you are getting closer or that neuroticism is sometimes a vehicle for a big experience (but don't push it if you can't sit trougn it). I have learned to reduce pain in the body and sit for longer periods of time, which kinda correlates with feeling of a less of a boundary between the whole and that which is the delusion. However, it is very gradual for most people. Just fighting with the same patterns of fears and greeds and over decades of practice some of them finally subside, and you can build momentum for sense of freedom and acceptance of life as an entire phenomenon which is 99.9% unknown to us opposed to the dream we call life. I want to make this clear, I have not had any extraordinary experience than anyone here and I am not claiming I am enlightened. But I have to know something that is working for me with it's benefits. There are some things indeed that a materially oriented person has not experienced or noticed while being completely sober. Something regarding life and death has been solved. Just a matter of deepening that. I always feel energetically bad for sharing this stuff for some reason. So don't take my word for it. Look for authentic scriptures and words from enlightened masters. If I will tell you something false and you will waste your life by doing what I said, it will be very unfortunate for you.

Sometimes you gotta figure how to wipe it, you know? Or why to wipe it for so long or to shit consciously or whatever. 😀

This happens only to people who are top 1 % of gamers and make money with it and how they play something is acctually very entertaining to watch because they are so good at it. Weed... well, I never trust and plan things with people that smoke weed, they will just find a reason not to do something and will lack focus.

Start singing. People who sing have very interesting and expressive quirks in their speech and intonation. I find it really attractive and I will instantly know if I hear it.

There are two things in life I have to avoid. One is female jazz vocalists and this demon.

I am not into chess. I rather play heroes of might and magic 5.5, pick necropolis, win everyone on impossible difficulty and the last opponent is a demon lord who gates his army and kills all my units with few losses.

I have heard multiple sources people like sadhguru and other kriya/hatga yogis and tantrics that it is not nonsense.

I like being submissive, because I am naturally very introverted and passive and I had a very authoritative figure in my childhood which resolved in a lot of trauma. But then I don't talk to women that much.

There was one metal concert I went to. I saw some guys in headphones trying to protect their hearing. These guys also told that one of the performers is a very good audio engineer. But acctually the sound of the performance objectively sucked because the speakers were fucked by the venue already. Meanwhile some of the most experienced musicians I saw (that i recognized locally that attended the event) they had no hearing protection. Strange, isn't it.

I will live for three things. Meditation, health and music.

I did not get what you meant, however I can expand a little bit further. About relationship, although I haven't had one, I tend to think this way. You will live with another human being for a long period of time. Neither of you are perfect. I feel that it has to be somewhat informed decision based on some things and of course you may not find the perfect one and have to choose from whatever options you have if any (for some men). You will be able to see what people value not from what they say but from subtle hints when they are interacting with different people and from watching their consistency of character in some moderate period of time. Since any relationship is transactional, you would have to think, well is it worth it for you? How it will affect your life? Based on their character, how would you estimate that, in what ways? If she is drinking for example, there are following consequences for that. She will endlessly try to convince you to drink and get mad/have arguments because of that. This habit will spiral some other issues from lack of awareness such as neglecting their finances, health, probably lying some more (because she has a destructive coping strategy and can't think in a bit bigger picture), drinking creates inferiority complex and she will always project that guilt on you with her other trauma which she is probably not going to resolve, because of her habit. She will think that she cannot change and cannot grow and ask you to change and make you feel guilty about being you instead of her. Also shaming you for not drinking means that she genuinely does not care about you. You are a vehicle in her life to feel secure about something I would assume, because that is the ancient story "I want to have everything other people seem to have which is the status of being with the other half". Also how do you feel yourself about her? Do you really like her or you are just being needy or she only triggers sexual desire? I once had a classmate that had a very big and fit round ass. She was genuinely a good candidate for relationship because she did not have a lot of bad habits and she was into sports, but I only had a sexual desire for her. Later on she hit on me even when she had a boyfriend. But instantly my logic turned on and I understood, even if I try to become her boyfriend, there would be so much drama and she left him after all, she can leave me too like that. And if I did date her, I would not become as of a musician I am l today and that is what I am most passionate about right now. Is living alone better or do you really need that companionship? I am not saying you don't, although I am biased towards being single, but it's up to you. Are there any different quality women in your circles? Are they better candidates for a sustainable relationship, raising children or living together with your ambitions, goals and desires?

I only really care about creating beautiful music, staying healthy and meditating. Maybe I will find such a crazy woman to be with, but from what I see around me it's a big investment of time, effort, arguments, sacrifices etc.

Bad quality person to hang around with. Leave her. She will not have enough awareness to be a decent person, to care about herself and to care about you and she has to resolve her trauma for which she has an alcohol problem and is arrogant about it "how can you not drink, how it is possible?" 1000x better to live alone or find someone else.

Heroes of might and magic 5.5. I think I am good enough to play for money, but it will be very long game, like a week.

I am starting to dislike tech death...