SunAngel

This forum has been so cool to explore. People in this community is really so kind and loving. Having "digged" into stuff in here, as well as watching @Leo Gura videos, I am quite perplexed when it comes to not finding "depth", in anything, and I have this enormous feeling of inside sadness. Am I misunderstanding the deeper level of self-actualisation/awareness from Leo's perspective/techniques/teaching?

@Shin <3

@Nahm Thank you for you answers. After listening again about the model of spiral dynamics, I realize that all my life I have had multiple "experiences" that might be called "mystical/spiritual", e.g. sensing "energy" around others, seeing different colours around people, many many times "knowing" when things will be cancelled (like meetings), at least 4 times I have met persons in my dreams that I knew when I woke up that they had passed over or would do so in next few days, and I feel physically ill and/or contamined around some people. As this have been like this my whole life, so it was not anything "weird/special" for me going through life sensing different "energies" or what we should call it, and as I can't connect to any specific religion, just "knowing" there is something else after this Earth life, so I have never seeked or felt the need to "label" me Islam, Christian, Buddhist, Spiritual etc. - just haven't thought about this, just lived that my Journey here is just like this and nothing more to it (I mean, I haven't thought about any ideologies or something - just walked my path, enjoying it even if Life is sometimes real shit - in my mind, this is just how Life is). Maybe this is why my experience being in a tunnel with my son in my arms striked me as little "unusual" and trying to understand if I had actually possibly been "allowed" to hand him over to a Light-Being, follow my son all the way, was so filled with serenity and humbleness, that I became actually "shy" to only the thought - I mean, I am just a small human being - is it possible I was "allowed" to see/sense so close to the "passing over" without having my own near-death experience...?

Thank you all for these warm and compassionate words and variety of answers, I am processing all of them. After having been introduced to new perspectives, the concept of spiral dynamics really spoke to me, especially the highest turquoise stage where I connected to my experience. Does anyone know if it is even possible for an individual to have experiences on this turquoise level without having actively and systematically worked on personal development for a long time??

Hello! Finally I might have found the right place which could lead me towards possibly understanding an experience I have had. Three years ago my youngest child passed away after years of illness. On the day of passing I had this experience that changed something inside of me, and still to this day I have no explanation nor understanding what it really was. Lying beside my unconscious child in the hospital bed I suddenly went to some different state. For some time I sensed that I was inside a dark tunnel, carrying my child towards a Light. At the end of the tunnel there was a tall light being waiting, and I felt that I should hand my child into the arms of this being. Then I went back trough the tunnel and then suddenly I was back again in the hospital bed, realising that my child was no longer alive. After burying my child, I have many times thought about this experience and I have felt a deep need to try to understand it. I have searched for understanding in many places - professionally, unprofessionally - and have had some glimpses of explanation, but not fully, not concretely. Most people, even professionals, whom I shared this experience with, have showed me compassion, love, and understanding that I need to believe something like this for coping with the death of my child, but no-one, ever could take this talk deep enough. I started to see that this is a really hard topic and people would rather avoid to delve into it, so after few attempts I started to get embarrassed and at some point finally stopped searching. A few weeks ago I had a discussion with my friend, who introduced me to the concept of spiral dynamics explained by Leo. In the past I was practicing some meditation, self development, positive psychology, but I would never consider myself as a spiritual person. But watching trough this videos made me realize that there could be something higher than I ever consider, and my experience with my child could be explained as this turquoise prove of different reality. This is how I've seen the chance of new possible answers within this community. Community of people for whom seeking higher experiences is the true passion. I decided to try here. So I'd like to ask: Is my experience something that could be explained? Have anybody experienced something similar? Can it be I was experiencing something on a higher level? Where should I seek further answers? In which form should I deepen my knowledge? Sending Love and Light to all of you.