Illusory Self

@Aaron p Do you know best alternative for IOS?

25/06/2022 - Friday Total Approaches: 62 Approaches: 10 What went well? Made a lot of girls laugh Approached quite a bit to begin with Girls were attracted to me Making a lot of statements What went bad? Could not lead (afraid of leading) Mind went blank a lot - did not know what to say Left club early and was not doing any approaches at the end of the night (was tired) Approaches were not that direct and strong (mediocre) Cringed one girl out who was into my by saying something cringy What will I do better next time? Approach immediatly, even when I leave the house to get into state Incorporate the 3s rule Lead the interaction/conversation Be more physical (man:woman frame) Summary of the night Happy with the night as I definitely feel like I have somewhat improved on my socialisation skills. I spoke to some guys/girls and I know what went wrong. I should of approached more consistently however as a lot of the time I was not in the right mindstate or headspace to. Approaches are not very strong at all, very mediocre because I feel a sense of shame/anxiety by stating my true intentions to a woman. Honestly like 90% of the women I spoke to seemed to be attracted to me/hooked and I felt like I good of fucked them if my game was better. My social skills and fear of leading the sets is what is holding me back. Going to go out tonight and try to have a freedome from outcome/detatchment mindset. Learning to enjoy the art of the conversation process. I will just get in there even if they don't like me. Assume that they do. Also I heavily need to work on dance floor game as most of the time was spent in the smoking area.

I find myself attempting to get better, develop myself in different areas of my life but that is what mostly my life feels like it is about. I want to do things that I genuinely enjoy doing outside of constantly trying to improve myself because I know I will eventually burn out but I don't seem to enjoy anything. How much time should I spend on recreational activities because in the past when I burn out I typically resort to mind numbing T.V and social media to distract myself but I don't enjoy that, I just do that as a distraction because I feel exhausted. How do I go about finding things that I enjoy & how much time should I allocate to it. I find a lot of the time that I am thinking about the next thing to accomplish when I am going for a walk or with my family. I want to ideally set a period of time for myself just doing what I enjoy without the pressure of feeling like I need to try to achieve something. I tend to put a lot of mental pressure on myself when I am doing activities that feel like I am wasting my time. I almost feel like I cannot even find enjoyment in anything because my mind will be like 'I should be working on my business' or 'I'm wasting my time'. My schedule currently feels so hectic with trying to improve my dating/education/bodybuilding/finances/spiritual life that it all seems like I am trying to just self improve constantly but from past experience that tends to lead to burn out & I end up self indulging in hedonistic pleasures, laying in bed & not doing anything. I need a healthy strategy to cope with this because otherwise I always seem to fall back to square one. I am just trying to think how on much 'me' time I need to allocate outside of constant self improvement & what to do as most things just tend to feel like one huge grind for me. I am also scared that my mind will want to self improve, even if I do allocate time for myself outside of personal development which will make the experience unenjoyable

@Leo Gura @universe @Raze Thanks for all the help. Hugely appreciated. Just went on another date, although didn't close, I felt so free because it seemed so enjoyable to me. Obviously there are things I did wrong which need to be analyzed. I got into a flow state of talking about anything.

Thought I would share my date experience because right now it seems to of shifted my mind into a lot of negative thought spirals. I concluded the best thing to do would to share exactly how the date went, how I felt during the date etc... First of all I want to say I have been making a conscious effort to really try and improve my personality lately/work on my game. I have no problems in the looks department but my personality is incredibly lackluster. I have been getting a lot of leads from online game for dates - being doing social anxiety challenges during the day & going out 2 nights a week to socialise with girls. I even got a lay the other week. I have been trying to be more funny and socialise by doing at home exercises. Anyway on to the date... at the bar we both got drinks, I don't drink alcohol but decided to get an alcoholic drink so I do not come across as strange since she is really into drinking and going to clubs. I know that is the first mistake, I learned from it and am never going to give up my values like that again. It was only 1 bottle of lager. We sat outside with the drinks on some stalls, fairly close to each other. My first impressions of the girl was that she seemed incredibly dull without much of a personality. I found it incredibly hard to talk to her. It is like I would ask her a question & she would respond and then ughhhh what to talk about next... The theme of the interaction was in my own mind I was very much micromanaging every single thought of my own to not come accross as weird/creepy. It left me blank minded most of the time of not knowing what to say. I was rather quite, whenever she was talking, I was thinking what should I say next. Where do I steer the conversation. I did make her laugh a few times... but the conversation was incredibly aimless, like there was no strategic plan & it was mainly question asking with a few statements here and there. I did not do any pshycality because my fear was way to bad, it seemed even worse because of my intense micromanaging of thoughts. I asked her to come back to mine to watch some movies but she declined because she said to meet her friends (expected as much) since the vibe was horrific but at least that was somewhat stepping outside my fear zone. That was basically the conversation process. Is it my responsibility as a man to make a shy timid girl come out of her shell or do some people just not vibe well? Like if I had good game and the girl was just looking for sex which she said over message, is it up to me to bring her back to mine to close even though it felt so damn hard to talk to her? Typical thoughts that go in my mind: 1. What do I talk about? 2. How do I move things forward in a smooth way? 3. What if I say the wrong thing? 4. Talking is so draining/exhausting 5 . I don't enjoy being here Oh another thing.. I find sometimes I really want to socialize and talk to people and othertimes It is so damn draining and I want to get the hell out of any chit chat because it means I have to open my mouth... Decades of playing runescape and being a hermit in my mums basement has kind of fucked me up I think when it comes to my socialization and being around others... Like I know I can socialize and make people laugh, I am a completely different person lately when I am around my family practice humour exercise. It is because I feel more relaxed. When I go on dates I get so damn stifled internally. It is such an inner game problem. Now onto my mindset during the interaction, this gets really deep and it feels very much ingrained in my psyche but I would often get thoughts of her not wanting to being around me, saying I have to go or something. I felt incredibly tense. I felt like I did not want to be there. It felt like such a chore, I just wanted to go. At parts I was thinking, I just want to get the hell out of there with no sex. Like I didn't even want to try. Almost like internal torture. I deemed myself unworthy of attracting her. So these thoughts would kind of pop up here and there during the whole interaction. I was constantly scared of saying the wrong thing or being judged. I eventually said lets go when I finished my drunk, we both hugged and parted our ways. This is probably around my 15-16th failed date now, it seems to be getting emotionally challenging for my because there is this thing in my psyche that is constantly wanting to chase girls because I was never good with them to the expense of my own business work and stuff. Like I just want to bang the hottest girls to get it out of my system, then another part of me is like will I ever even change... Do I just need to do inner work before trying to date? Every date I go on seems to spiral my mind into negative thinking, anyway I thought I would share this on here to let out my frustrations on not being able to connect with women even though I know what attracts them, I still fail to do any of that. Maybe it is just bad social anxiety. I even get afraid that I might text the wrong thing. How do I reframe this and stop this negative thinking when it comes to dating... dating has put me in very bad places in the past and this is a huge obstacle I must overcome. These dates seriously can affect my self esteem and mind states after it, they typically fail. How do I get into a good/happy state before the date?

Day 13 (repeat) Approached 16 girls & asked for time, nearest place they sell wine, got a promotion at work, what wine do they recommend Repeated that 4x Repeating a few of the days to ingrain it more thoroughly into my nervous system. Today felt pretty easy, I notice myself being more comfortable around others. Been nervous to do day 14 which is the high five challenge. Also I may be doing this semi-inconsistently as I find it quite hard to find time out of the day to dedicate hitting on girls in the day time. Quite a few girls seem to show some kind of interest. Slowly ramping shit up..

I am undertaking the Goodlookingloser AA challenge. It involves progressive desensitization every single day when talking to girls & will take 7 weeks in total. I currently am on day 5. I need to get better with women so I feel like journaling it on here will be a good idea. I was originally going to journal on onenote but maybe this will inspire some of you & is a sense of some accountability. First three days was mainly just setting up a journal, signing up to online dating ect..

Yeah, my main sticking point is honestly rapport/connection building. Thanks for the advice.

I went out today for a few hours to practice some day game infield & here is a summary of how my day went. Previously I did a post of me saying hi to 100 different strangers which caused some minor anxiety in me. Today I told myself I am going to approach girls & simply say to them "hey hows it going". Surprisingly the first girl I said that to was immediatly receptive to me & started asking questions about how my day was ect.. We were talking for a few minutes, there was a lot of anxiety in me at the time so it did not really feel that much of a fluent conversation but at the end I just decided to say "we should go get drinks sometime" & she just gave me her number so I will text her later. Here is what what went well: I had a fluent 40 minute conversation with my hairdresser today, approached 2 random guys sitting on a bench at the beach and had around a 30 minute conversation with them, they were around my age. Approached 11 women. I said hi to 36 strangers, but saying hi does not really seem to provoke any anxiety in me anymore so I felt like it was a waste of my time to do that. Another great thing I have been practicing, is whenever I am out in public I maintain eye contact with everyone, forcing them to break it off with me. It seems to be improvining my confidence, instead of just looking at the ground, at my feet the whole time. Here is what did not go so well: I found a majority of the women I approached just blanked me, they were just plugged in with their earphones & would walk past me. some of them did not even have earphones in but I would say hey hows it going & they would just walk past me looking disinterested, I did not know if I was trying hard enough. Maybe I should walk alongside them in the future. One crucial thing I learnt today though that I would bring up in the conversation is that I could tell the girls were so happy that I gave them a compliment of calling them cute, even if they rejected you by having a boyfriend ect... I would just say "I thought you looked really cute so I had to approach you" after they said they had a boyfriend & they seemed really happy by that. Probably the worst thing that happened I think is the 3 or 4 girls who seemed initially interested in me, I would blow it because after the hows it going, I could not think of anything to sau so I would resort to just saying what have you been up to ect.. You know when your mind gets totally blanked out.. I think my main hurdle will be knowing how to keep the convo going initially untill I reach hook point. I could tell some of the girls were attracted to me but my poor verbals just ruined it. I know they could sense the awkwardness & that is why they just said have a nice day and left. Other than that I am happy with how my day went because I grew in some way, the girls negative reactions I found did not really affect my self worth as a man which I am happy about. I just wanted to know what should I do to try & overcome of saying the same things after the approach, almost like my mind has a robotic script in it. I can't seem to enjoy the interaction. I'm like wtf do I talk about to a complete stranger who is an attractive women?! Maintaining the convo is defo going to be the hardest for me I think since most girls expect you to lead the convo. Going to attempt to go out Fri & Sat night this week, hopefully it will go well

Day 12 (repeat) Approached 16 girls & asked for time, nearest candle shop, said I am planning a candlelit dinner for my girlfriend, I am the sweetest guy ever Repeated that 4x Decided to repeat day 12 to get used to it since I had a few days off and to really become comfortable with approaching. I also did day 13 which I journaled on my onenote but going to be repeating that also before the high fives on day 14.. scared of doing that.. Today was easy going up to approach.. Most girls are incredibly receptive to my approaches.. Just went in, did the drill and got out of there... Day 13 again tomorrow

Day 12 Approached 16 girls & asked for time, nearest candle shop, said I am planning a candlelit dinner for my girlfriend, I am the sweetest guy ever Repeated that 4x Felt really easy today, although the lines do seem somewhat scripted. I was to lazy to write the journal entry yesterday which is why I am writing it today. I was not focused on what the other person said, more focused on doing the drills and getting out..... Few girls seemed attracted to me... and a few just ignored me... not everyone is guna like you. Feelings of sadness have been increasing but going to try and do the drill later on today for day 13..

15/06/2022 - Tuesday Total approaches: 52 Approaches: 5 What went well? third girl i approached was attracted to me instantly Did some approaches Was being physical Getting better at jumping different conversational threads What went bad? Very logical Mind went blank a lot Did not know how to phsycially escalate and move things forward with girl who was attracted to me Could of done more approaches to build state Did not know how to sexualize What will I do better next time? Approach immediatly and hit on loads of girls to build state Approach more Focus on being in my body relaxed and not trying to manipulate the environment Try to have mindset of assuming attraction before approach Get less out of my logical mind Summary of the night I did have some learning experiences tonight but I did leave the place early and did not do many approaches. I find the longer I leave it, the worse I feel inside of my own mind about approaching a woman. I got instant attraction from this 1 cute girl from switzerland but it was hard to talk to her and I had no idea how to escalate. The conversation was very boring I felt and was putting a lot of internal pressure on what to do next. I could of fucked her if I had better game. Kept on getting a lot of voices inside my mind of unworthiness ect when I was speaking to her. One of my wings told me to reopen her again but I probs DLVED myself because there was a lot of silence in the interaction. She said she wil text me but I highly doubt it.

Day 11 Approached 20 girls & asked for time, nearest cellphone shop, what phone do they have, do they like it (probably approached 25 girls or so) For example: Girl 1: Asked for time. Girl 2: Asked for time & where is the nearest phone shop. Girl 3: Asked for time, nearest phone shop, what phone do you have. Girl 4: Asked for time, nearest phone shop, what phone do you have & do you like it Repeated that 4x I definitely noticing myself just finding it a lot easier to talk to strangers, I seem to feel more comfortable in the outside world. Slowly improving my self image of myself with this + daily visualisations. I seem to be getting better at differentiating between the girls that are attracted to me vs the girls that are not. If they are busy with there day, I move onto the next & find one who is into me. Today went suprisingly easy, I do still need to practice approaching as soon as a girl I would bang walks past. I did let a few slip by but I am working on it.

Day 10 Approached 15 girls & asked for time, directions to nearby movie theatre, have they seen any movies recently they liked. For example: Girl 1: Asked for time. Girl 2: Asked for time & where is the nearest cinema. Girl 3: Asked for time, nearest cinema & have you seen any movies recently Repeated that 5x Today I basically had barely any AA, of course I let a few girls slip by but managed to get this challenge over pretty quickly. I was not fazed whatsoever by any kind of rejection. Infact a lot of girls gave me positive signals like they wanted to bang me. They even got there phone out to google maps to show me where there cinema is, wanting the conversation keep on going. I was like no, I am going to do the drill & get out ASAP. Got overwhelming amount of positive responses however. Seemed so effortless. It can be a nice boost your confidence knowing that there are a lot of girls out there who want to bang you. It is just a matter of putting yourself out there. Giving online dating a try also, getting loads of girls on there. It is honestly just a matter of mass approaching/mass aquiring new leads into the funnel. I learnt that for attraction to happen you must approach because girls are so lost in there own world & it almost feels like after you approach they are hyponitized into your reality.

Ive done probably around 40 - 50 approaches this week & found that I have learned quite a bit. I notice when I go in for the approach it is more smooth but my verbals seems to be incredibly bad a majority of the time, it is like my unconsciousness will resort to asking 'boring questions' when in fact I can talk about anything. I left the club early tonight because my throat was sore from speaking so much, is that normal? I got into some very nice flow states some of the time when I would speak with no kind of filter & make women laugh but other times my mind will cloud everything with a million different filters. I found it so mentalling draining tonight, especially towards the end. The process of talking to a girl did not even appeal to me after 20 approaches. But small wins, I know I must focus on the process + changing your ego structure is no easy task, especially when being a reclause for most of my life. I guess my main question is do I just trust the process of experience for mistakes to correct themselves? I suffer with social anxiety & neediness + introversion I guess my mind at the end of the night was going down some negative thought patterns even though girls give me there numbers & I get attraction a lot, is there a good way to reframe it

Day 9 Approached 15 girls & asked for time, directions, have they been to a nearby restaurant & do they like it. I said do they like it even if they said no. For example: Girl 1: Asked for time. Girl 2: Asked for time & have you been there?. Girl 3: Asked for time, Restaurant & do you like it Repeated that 5x Honestly, today I had barely any AA anxiety at all. I more or less viewed everyone as if they are my friend. I seem to be picking up the subtle attraction signs that girls give me. Girls that are attracted vs not attracted. Today went really quick an easy, I even made a girl laugh. I feel like I am slowly understanding the psychology behind how girls act. Very non logical.

My problems come in after the approach tbh, I can approach but then I get so stifled. I know it is just lack of experience though & putting expectations on having an end result

11/06/2022 - Saturday Total approaches: 47 Approaches: 20 ( estimate, was not counting that much) spoke to a lot of guys also but I was just talking to anyone I see for the experience What went well? Made out with first girl I approached (fit dutch girl) I did manage to do some leading, moving around venue Approached a lot of girls very quickly Some of the night I got into flow state Got better at dance game (dancing with girl in club) Spoke to basically everyone Better body language Got 2-3 phone numbers What went bad? Need more sleep from night before (very tired) To much interview style questions Did not ask for the first girls number earlier enough A lot of neediness/blank mind Left club early Could of approached more Could of been more phsyical To much time talking to guys Approaches were not as strong as I would like Did not know what to do after she hooked (felt confused) Was just aimlessly dancing with the girl after I hooked her (should of tried to build rapport) What will I do better next time? Have more of a game plan Stronger approaches Audit my thoughts & be less in my head Sleep better Try to come up with better conversational topics Summary of the night I am happy that I went out to do 20 approaches tonight, I must repeat this whole process again next week (yawn). Some of the social interactions were fun and some were a bloody chore. I think I am slowly getting more of a confidence boost, like a lot of the girls I was speaking to seemed really into but were not exactly my type (maybe I need to lower my standards). I guess all of this is just reference experience. I did leave early as my throat was bloody sore, probably need to recover for a while now. I am happy I got with the first girl I approached even though she left me later on because I was an aimless AFC..... I did make some girls laugh but to my own expense.. One day I will enjoy socialising, I am sure...... just a lot of the childhood trauma to deal with so gota love myself because none of it is my fault. All of this was done sober

Day 8 Approached 16 girls & asked for time, directions, have they been there before & do they like it. If they said they did not like it, I would have to approach another girl. Probably approached around 20-25. For example: Girl 1: Asked for time. Girl 2: Asked for time and directions. Girl 3: Asked for time, directions, have they been there before & do they like it Repeated that 3x I feel so much more socially liberated today than any other day in the program. My mind wanted to back out so much but I forced myself to do this challenge for this day. Honestly after I finished todays challenge, I felt the confidence to just go up to anyone and talk to them. If they reject me, move onto next one. I got so many blow outs today but a few girls did seem attracted to me & gave me good subtle signs that they wanted to bang. A lot of girls did not even have the time, but I am learning to just get rejected & move onto next one ASAP. Time is a valuable commodity. I did notice it felt somewhat awkward asking where the supermarket is just by how quick or slow I was saying it.. Hopefully these anxious traits will disapear overtime. It did seem to get a lot better the more interactions I had. I feel like it is getting easier as I am building up all of this social momentum.

11/06/2022 - Friday Total approaches: 27 Changing the approaches to 10 a night for probably the first 1-2 months as 20 is overwhelming when starting off. Approaches: 17 What went well? I approached more women than ever before I felt so relaxed in my body like no one was judging I almost felt in a drunk state sober Got into state super easily Managed to get 3 numbers Pulled one girl who was grinding on me for a lot of the night (seems down for date) Went straight in for the approach even though I did not know what to say Hooked at least 5-6 girls just based on my height Rejection did not bother me What went bad? Approaches seemed very forced on the open My mind went a lot of the time as I didn't know what to say Found it hard to hook the girls attention Left club early (2) Got very burnt out and tired from talking to all the girls (sore voice) Was afraid to physically escalate on a lot of sets I often resorted to boring questions because of blank mind Body language was tense & stiff on a lot of sets Took a while to do warm up sets for state building Gave across a nervous vibe/energy sometimes Did not lead the convos enough (afraid of leading) Girls could not here me in the club What will I do better next time? Try to do smoother approaches (less forced opens) Quickly do warm up sets to get into state Learn game on the dance floor without talking Spit out whatever thought comes into your head, with no filter Lead better Summary of the night Well, I really outdid myself on this night. I had an epiphiney moment to the realization on how much mental filters I put up in my mind. I was learning to let loose and spit out whatever thought came up in my head. I felt free for the first time in social situations, no fear of being judged. Just being myself. I am really happy that I went out tonight & forced myself to just go in and approach, no matter what. Every approach I grow somewhat, just learn from reference experiences. I used to say to myself in my own mind that the approach needs to be perfect but it does not. Just go in and say hi! it is better than not doing anything. Consciousness is so awesome when you reach a state of not caring what other people think and can dance freely. I have a long way to go still but tonight has really shown me glimpses into what is possible. Notes from when I was out (going to start journaling when I am out so see where I can improve) 10th approach I should of number closedand was hard to talk to her because of the music - maybe do more physical game on the dance floor It feels easier to approach in the dance floor without even talking, just physicality, 14th approach seemed into my but my mind went blank, unsure of what to say

Day 7 Approached 15 girls & asked for time, directions & have they been there before. For example: Girl 1: Asked for time. Girl 2: Asked for time and directions. Girl 3: Asked for time, directions & have they been there before. Repeated that 3x Similiar to yesterday but the theme of today was if I see a hot girl, just go in & approach. No pussying out of it. Well today went fantastic, much better than I expected. 2 girls where even trying to basically continue the conversation but my mindset was just do the drills & get out of there. A few key insights I got was, social momentum is a thing... approaching almost became effortless after the first few. Girls were smiling at me, at least 2 of them wanted to fuck me i'm sure. The last girl I approached asking where the nearest supermarket was & if she has been there wanted me to follow her to it... she was really attractive also & was with 2 of her girlfriends. They went around the courner to the supermarket & I was thinking in my mind should I follow them out of obligation because I would look weird if I don't. I decided to just walk straight up the street while they went to the supermarket. My mindset is to just do the drills & get out of there, progressively amping up the interactions as time goes on. I feel good. Really happy with the progress today.... 1% better today I am sure! Going to go out to practice nightgame, managed to find some wings in my city.

For someone who has no sense of work ethic & has relied heavily on there parents for basically all of my life, I am terrified of burning out & collapsing. I am 26 & it has been a recurring theme of laziness within my life, I will tell myself I need to be this better version of myself & on some days I just lay in bed all day doing nothing. This has been happening for weeks, like a recurring theme in my life. After watching Leo's recent video, it has evoked a spark within me to stop wasting my life so I have been trying to meditate, work on my own business for an hour a day, journal, read for 1 hour a day, working on my social skills ect... I am on a high with the momentum currently because I have been consistent with it for around 4 days now. I guess a part of me is terrified that I am going to slip back into my old ways of doing which is laying in bed all day wasting life, watching yt vids & social media just to pass away the time so I can go back to sleep. I have a lot of time on my hands because I mainly work for my Dad's business & he does not really expect me to do much for him. Honestly though I find even 1 hour of focused work on my own business challenging, shall I start with that? I guess a part of me wants to put like 5 hours a day in on the business but I am scared that will lead to a burn out. I guess I am so intertwined with my family situation that it feels somewhat toxic towards my personal growth. There is this huge fear of doing things for myself. Am I doing to much at once ? Ideally I want to do loads to get out of my situation sooner rather than later but I know myself & have backslided so much in the past without any growth. I know what where I want to be say in 5-10 years - it took a lot of questioning throughout the day but I have a roadmap in my own mind. It is a matter of how much to do in the day to get from point A to point B. Every single week in my past I have layed in bed all day for 2-3 days feeling the worst form of depression after trying to grow for around a few days. I guess a part of me is terrified of that happening again. What is a healthy way of going about this for someone who basically has no work ethic but has a vision on what they want in life. Is it possible to do all of this at once to reap the most benefit? Or just start small & count the small wins? Shall I give myself a daily time out from working/personal development? Building a work ethic feels challenging but I know I must do it in order to grow. I feel like my family giving me everything in life has not helped. Imagine just being born but being 26, that is kind of what reality feels like to me. Plus some childhood trauma that I need to work through. Would appreciate what you would do if you were in my situation. I am trying to mix meditiation, socializing & business work in order to live a more balanced life and to grow in a balanced way

Day 6 Approached 15 girls & asked for time, directions & have they been there before. For example: Girl 1: Asked for time. Girl 2: Asked for time and directions. Girl 3: Asked for time, directions & have they been there before. Repeated that 3x I found today was quite easy, I think it is because the momentum is building up from previous days, small wins. I improved 1% today... I will have effortless social interactions before I know it!

I have been trying to get out of my tiny little bubble the last few days & actually talking to 'others' which I am finding challenging is when I seem to be explaining things my mind tends to drift of into thinking such things as 'I am boring them' 'it will be better if I stop talking' etc.. especially if the other person looks away or something. Almost like I am so unsure of myself... I tend to feel incredibly lost in social settings, overanalyzing everything, never knowing what to say, how to be, what my personality is.. should I do this or should I do that. Will this correct itself with more socializing? will I just naturally get better at explaining things in certain contexts the more I practice.. right now I feel like I suck at talking about things & very bad at leading a conversation. Also very bad at telling stories Just by practicing socialising the last few days, it has become apparently obvious to me how bad I am at talking to others or expressing myself - it feels like it has shined much more consciousness on my deficincies. This goes to even texting & journaling, writing on here. I find it so incredibly hard to just be. I overanalyze everything in my head 10x.

Day 5 Approached 10 girls & asked them for the time I found the approaches incredibly easy today as momentum was built up from doing 10 approaches last night. Got the time off of 10 girls in a short period of time. Going to celebrate the small wins.