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@Nilsi Problem with double standards is that either you lie about your values or you don't act according to them. The problem in both of the scenarios is that you are not developing as a person the pace you could. In the fish analogy if you think it's wrong decision to you stop eating fish then you shouldn't and vice versa. Eating fish doesn't still mean that you vote for overfishing and therefore anyone who argues against you on this tries argumenting tactics. I agree that big picture problems should always be solved in structure level though.

@KpGoing125 You should aim to be in the moment, yes, but what I meant was that if you want to redirect your life so you'll reach your dreams you should aim to have flow in tasks you do daily so the progress happens almost accidentally. The journey will be long and that's why it should be also extremely enjoyable, because the path is the goal. There's nothing more to life than the life you live right now so make most of what you're doing right now and you'll find love, the true love, which's waiting you in the present moment. I meet you there <3

Almost everyone has that deep loneliness inside them so see if you find it through the next song. That's the only way to escape the prison you're in. Strength and love to your process, you beautiful soul <3 -joNi-

@KpGoing125 I guess you're feeling better already, because you did the action that it took. Important thing when you start doing things is to do lot of easy enjoyable things to get yourself in flow state. You don't need necessarily need to do the hardest things always till you exhaust yourself. Don't take this still as an excuse to be lazy, because you need to find balance in my advice which works for you. Add some walking/running in nature/outside in general to get yourself to better mood. If you don't have anything to do when you read this message then commit to this action NOW. Remember that you can post here happily when you actually did what I said and I'll cheer you up <3 -joNi-

I got the mile in 6:28, but it's still miserable.

@Rainy Sparkle Boom, that's something! : )

@Rainy Sparkle Maybe that you can reach your previous limits is a thing which could motivate you, but that your actual limit is being pushed further is one signal of progress in my eyes. I think if you find new things what you are capable of doing, you should happy instead of thinking that you'll never reach them. What's the point of reaching highest potential anyways? ... ... ... to stop developing? ... ... ... that could be point to stop living as well, because to live is to change. I mean you should be happy of being the best version of yourself today that could be possible. Maybe the thing is that you have to give validation to yourself, but you don't know when to give it, because if you give it too early, you think you'll stop trying and if you don't give it then you'll lack self-love. Solution to this type of though process is allowing yourself to love yourself as you are. You are important, but that doesn't still mean that you couldn't play the game to up your champion's skill numbers. Self-love and actually all love should be unconditional which means that you shouldn't need to be certain way to receive love. That you work on yourself is one signal of self-love, because you're giving more beautiful things to yourself and you're opening new doors to new experiences. You're giving more power to choose for yourself and making yourself feel/be more capable. Also the fact that your limit of yourself in your imagination is reaching new realms could be seen as a possibility to give more self-love to yourself in the future and now. You're right that it's all about mindset and actually no one should be disagreeing with anything that you said here.

@Tyler Robinson wanted to make collaborate journal about inner child so here we go ?. I guess we are going to show people that it is completely okay just be yourself and express your inner desires. I think people are too serious nowadays about what others think and result from that behaviour is suppressed inner child which cries for your attention. Majority of people are so cruel that they ignore this child. How selfish you are, and towards who? Funniest thing is that it is you, yourself, which doesn't get enough attention and if you don't give it then who it'd be? So let's get the party going ?.

@Bobby_2021 Yeah I agree fully, because spiral dynamics isn't competition, but map to see where you have something to work on.

@Tyler Robinson You're mine encouragament so do something that could inspire me. I mean you already are working on one thing

@Tyler Robinson Basically you are asking how to make most of your time and answer for that is to have always couple things you want to do in your mind and choose new one when you don't have anything to do. There doesn't need to be specific techniques to intake information, but just will to do so at any cost. I mean you don't have to be that hardcore all the times, but by knowing this you know your max capability. There are so many things you could accomplish in your life if you'd just do them. You already know what you want to do so go and get it. I genuinely trust you and want you to succeed. So go girl!

@Emrie Everytime when I try to do something and my mind starts to be pussy I just say aloud "shut up!" and I continue happily knowing that I am the one in control. Happens in the cold showers or when I am just trying to make myself start something. I always end up doing what I told myself to do, because I don't allow myself to lie to myself. That is the biggest sin I guess human can make. Without being honest to yourself you'll always lack control to achieve your dreams.

@Cat_eyes Ta - da, you got it ?

@Ulax So instead of doing introspection you just ended 2 discussions where the type of communication wasn't what you wanted. Keep in mind that you were involved in both of those 2 discussions . But yeah I understand I shouldn't force people to see anything like the saying goes “you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink”. Maybe I tried push growth little too aggressively on you. Honest sorry for that. Anyways stay strong champ! -joNi-

@Tyler Robinson When we are talking about learning to fight we are not talking about learning to fight in real scenario , but instead in boxing gym. Much love <3

@Ulax Understand that your argument could be flipped around and phrased like that. No amount of stage green experiences/ integration will make up for lack of experiences in stage orange, red and blue for example. You are trying to make stage green look like the best stage of those, but all of them are equally important and actually you couldn't even reach stage green well without having lower stages in good shape. I mean you could, but skipping stages and rushing in process just makes more blind spots that you have to solve in the future anyways. I have made it very easy for you to admit that we actually agree on things, but it feels that you are trying to defend your stage green perspective for some reason that I don't even know why. Yeah maybe it was very precious, irreplaceable and useful for your situation and situations that you have heard. I say it one more time, I am not denying the power of using stage green perspectives to heal trauma, but I am trying to show that it is not superior and people need to find what works for them. You can't know that and I do neither. So I ask nicely if you could just relax a little and allow yourself to see other side of this discussion too. The point is because it seems that you actually have some shadow work to do in lower stages and you can't make yourself to work on those before you admit that they are equally important. How I see that is, because you have very negative approach to these masculine traits and lower stages in general. Contemplate a little towards my points and give it a change that what I try to show you is actually very important. Don't answer unconsciously, slow down and really think about your response. And try to be little more gentle like real man who has integrated stage green would be <3

@Ulax We don't disagree even on what will work on trauma. I acknowledge that your method works, but you have to also see that there are more than one way to do things. I'd even advice to combine deep introspection with an actual work on personal life to achieve best results possible. Point I am trying to make is that even if hammer is your favourite tool, you can't build whole house with it. Problem usually in debates and discussions is that people try to find which perspective is the best one while the answer is that the best one is that which includes all other perspectives.

@Nilsi Exactly! That's what I was trying to say. Much love to you <3

@Ulax As I said, use the method that is needed and for majority of people the problem is that they don't have enough self-esteem. It seems that you are talking from your own experience and it's great to see that you found what worked for you. All that I was trying to say was that for majority of people doing things to prove their capability is one of the key things they need to do. That's why I gave that perspective instead of other perspectives I could have said. I don't dissagree on your method, but just tried show where people should start this thing.

@Ulax Usually the best way to overcome trauma is to prove your trauma wrong showing yourself that you're very capable. There are lot of other methods and some approaches work for some and different to others. So people should contemplate what makes them feel that they're weak and then do things needed to change that picture of themself. Whatever it takes you should do it. And like @Nilsi said you don't necessarily need to do that work solely using stage green perspective. What I am talking about is what works for majority of the cases.

@Tyler Robinson Thanks and your laugh makes me smile <3 -joNi-

@Ulax There is lot to this thing and having long voice conversation about this is needed to explain it to make justice to my point, but I could give brief explanation about it. To be confident you need something to be confident about. That means you have to work on something, have dreams and achieve them. To be clear you need to know your values, passions and have knowledge to pursue those listed. To be strong you have to do that which you say, always. It doesn't matter if your hand falls to the ground you have to complete your task that you started.

@Ulax All the ways, but maybe the most important thing is to have strong, confident and clear mindset.

@Ulax When you obtain something that you lacked you're going to feel somehow fulfilled and because nowadays men lack lot of masculine side, there has been this masculine movement if it could be phrased like that. I see fulfillment and feeling whole as synonyms and that's why I also think that if you want to be fulfilled you need to train all areas in your life. You should work on the things that you suck the most to make greatest change overall and from that perspective most of men should build themselves to be stronger, because it seems that this quality is missing from majority of men.

The problem people are making when they judge some men qualities to be orange/red or whatever is that they assosiate those things to something negative that they have in their mind. There really is no downsides of having status, being sharp intellectually and being charismatic for example. Yeah it could be cool to have more other qualities as well, but those listed aren't bad. Why not have all good qualities of all spiral dynamic stages? Instead people should see that stages in spiral dynamics build top of each others and the whole building collapses if the level in under fails.