Gesundheit2

Always have been a hero, and will remain. I will only die a hero

@Something Funny Lol.

Indeed, I was hoping that it won't come to this. But I might be forced to take some drastic measures to get myself out of here.

Some bad changes are likely to happen next Friday. Lack of fuel will basically remove most electric power supply, and we will be living in the dark. I have a connection that can help me with this personally, but the entire country will probably be suffering darkness at least for this entire winter. I hope I will still be able to reach here and give updates on my situation. I will likely be able to, because the connection I know has infinite supply and is willing to let me stay with him for however long I need.

Okay, what's happening here? God bless multiple tabs.

For those suggesting a karma system:

Oh, poor slaves running the event. -- sent from not made by slaves iPhone.

666-666-666

I am garbage.

@Carl-Richard That sounds super cool! Will be waiting for your final analysis.

@Someone here Lol okay.

Don't assume that so-called "direct experience" alone can lead to truth. Maybe it can, but also maybe it can't. Consider both sides of the equation.

SP makes even the hippies look cool.

Interesting. It basically looks like percentages of stages Blue, Green, Orange, and Yellow (respectively from left to right) among scientists, which kinda makes sense. The lacking voting option is whether they actually know what God is. The thing they're voting on is rather a distant idea/belief/theory/speculation, not the actual thing that the word refers to.

Shamanic breathing has worked for me.

The earth is flat. The universe is finite. There is up and down. The sky is the ceiling. God is watching from above, and the devil is burning in hell.

@Barbara Alright, great! In this case, I would say start small. Don't overthink it or plan too much ahead. Start simple, by engaging in simple tasks (maybe just one or two per day) that don't take much time or energy but still are part of the greater goal, and the snowball will start rolling automatically and grow bigger in time. Your mind might start asking what should I start with? That doesn't matter. You're not trying to accomplish anything big just yet, rather you're just trying to get into the routine of work and to initialize the snowball. Don't judge your performance too highly, and of course don't forget to reward yourself afterwards.

Alien God Language: OMAG: Oh, my alien God. etc.

Nahm did not meditate for me, and he certainly did not contemplate instead of me. Not only that, but he also didn't jump out of the screen and give me instant enlightenment for free. I have proper, realistic expectations, but he's such an asshole for not following through them, even after accompanying me in my sad, lonely times.

@Barbara Sounds like you've experienced trauma that now needs to be resolved, which probably means vacation/retreat/inspection time. If that's not possible, then just focusing on the fundamentals for now with minimal effort. I would say you need to be absolutely honest with yourself about your current ability to pull through this (whether right now or after vacation). Do you think you can? If not, then you probably need to take some more time off and let yourself breathe a little bit before trying again. That means no books or anything that takes from your mind space and/or is related to stress. Keep in mind that you've already learned a lot and done a lot, so you won't need to start from square one when you come back later. Your knowledge is earned, and your progress is saved. I think you also need to understand that what happened is perfectly fine and normal. Too much work without enough rest is not ideal in the long run, and it will eventually backfire. That doesn't mean you can't work hard anymore or that any time you put in some effort you will return to that same nightmare. No, not at all. It just means that you need breathing spaces and a rewards system instead of being too hard on yourself and beating yourself up unnecessarily. I wouldn't worry about overcoming this fear just yet. When you're finally ready, you will know with absolute clarity the difference between being lazy/procrastinating vs. being exhausted/burned-out. As long as you can't tell the difference, then you're probably still tired and simply need more rest. As well, "too much work" is a relative thing. What might feel like too much at your current level will feel like nothing when you advance. So pace yourself at that. Use your feelings as a compass instead of your thoughts. No more workaholism, regardless of ambitions. Think of it like learning a new language. At first, you will struggle to create one sentence. Then later, it will become an integrated part of you, you will be able to write essays without even having to put any effort or think about it anymore. The process of mastery is always hardest in the beginnings, and you've probably already finished the hardest part. Also, consider trying to delegate micro-management to someone else. Your main focus should be on the bigger fish, not on the smaller distractive, and energy-consuming activities. Think of a family member to help you with this, could be a parent or a younger relative. That shouldn't cost a lot, and the returned value should be immense. I think what you probably need the most right now is comfort. So you might want to consider saving this post for later, while focusing only on the comforting parts for now and skimming through the practical parts. Take care, and good luck!

Because time is money.

Asking "why?" is useless in this context, because you really don't have a choice.