Yesterday I came into work and sat at my desk and started running reports. As I sat there, I started to get anxious, like I forgot to do something. The feeling didn't go away. I tried playing relaxing music. Didn't help. I ended up putting on the song "Back Down" by Bob Moses on repeat. Still no change. As the morning progressed, I kept getting more and more nervous. My chest started to get tight and I thought maybe my blood sugar was dropping. I ate my entire lunch by 10am. I was suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to leave the building. I mean straight out flee. At 11am I found my administrator and told him, "I feel like absolute shit and I need to go home." I reminded him that it was a remote day and my room did not need coverage. And I did. I sped the entire way home with my windows open and music blaring and feeling like I was being chased. The feeling didn't abate until I sat in my backyard in the sun for an hour with my dogs.
My fellow educators, I had my first full blown anxiety attack due to teaching.
UPDATE: thank you all for the incredible support and ideas you have all offered. I find it terrible that this is such a common thing among educators. It's just been a hell of a year for all of us.
