SM-OConnor

Thank you for the thoughtful responses. Tulpamancy looks interesting. I had no idea that was a thing. On some of my trips, entities would communicate with me. They felt more like additional streams of consciousness inside my own mind more than external beings. Might be a good starting point. This is quite overwhelming, and I am struggling to process it. Perhaps I just need some time. Ego reaction is likely the case, but damn I don't know how to let it go. I feel like all of my comprehension is torn apart, and nothing makes sense any longer. Surrendering the ego during the come up on a trip is easy, but not so much during the aftermath for me. As Inliytened1 said, I think being in that transitional state between God and human is challenging. Probably worth mentioning, I trip completely alone in the dark. As someone with Asperger's Syndrome, it's always been difficult to make friends. There is no one in my life I can speak to about such matters. This I imagine is even a problem for many other enlightenment seekers with large social circles. Simply engaging with all of you here has helped with the feeling of loneliness, so I thank you for that.

Extreme sadness, loneliness, and existential dread. These seem to be the results of my psychedelic trips and introspection. I understand I am God, and this reality is my own manifestation. During the peak of my trips I even felt the extraordinary bliss and pleasure of it. Yet, I cannot help but be haunted by the very dark implications of being utterly alone... and accepting that everything and everyone I ever loved are just figments of my imagination. Some guidance on how to deal with this, would be very much appreciated. My sincere thanks.