something_else

@Karmadhi I mean, there are literally infinite ways of sparking emotion. It's difficult to learn how to emotionally stimulate by having a logical discussion about how to do it, or by giving logical advice. It's something you just need to learn by practice. Broadly all of the well known attractive traits generate emotional stimulation: leadership - makes her feel like she's on an adventure with you, confidence - makes her feel safe around you, humour - removes negative emotion like tension, and so on

I made a cringy comment about going upstairs. In hindsight I should have just kissed her then and there and let things unfold naturally. Suggesting going upstairs was clunky and awkward and the exact wording I used (which is remaining secret ) was cringy af. But nonetheless it worked because there was tension and attraction, and low expectation because we were both young and nervous. Point is, you don't need to think too much about what you're actually gonna do beyond the initial escalation if there's already clear attraction. If there's attraction and you make _some_ move things will start to happen. After the initial escalation and things get even a little heated let your instinct take over and things will just sort themselves out

If you're both a little inexperienced/nervous you can get away with some cheesy and awkward moves Dear god one of my cringiest memories is how I escalated on my first date with my first GF, very similar situation, watching a movie at hers, was a first time for both of us. The movie ended and I had no idea what to say, but there was attraction and both of us were nervous as hell so it just kind of sorted itself out, even though I wasn't the slightest bit smooth lol. Got a 2 and a half year relationship from that

@ertopolice As in emotional stimulation? Guys who can stimulate emotions in women usually have a lot more success with women

@Karmadhi I mean, there's no reason you couldn't make that style work for you you. It's far more to do with how you say something than the actual content. Which has been said a million times, for good reason

@Karmadhi Why is an intellectually stimulating conversation any more valuable? Like 95% of the intellectually stimulating conversations I've had with my close guy friends has been lost to the void by now. It's completely pointless too Guys just happen to be able to extract more emotional stimulation out of an intellectual conversation than girls do (on average ofc), but it's still all about the emotion rather than intellectual content But being able to influence people's emotional state is unbelievably powerful which is why girls find it attractive. It's also incredibly fun for guys too if you get some good rapport going

Would be nice. Having said that this dynamic forces quiet guys to develop their social skills which is no bad thing

A few people here saying that wanting to regress into red is bad, well yea. But you can still learn valuable lessons from it. What you want to take from red is individual strength and independence. There are tons of healthy ways to do that. Face some of your biggest fears, go travelling/exploring to new places by yourself, climb mountains, go on treks, lift weights, learn a martial art. Basically you want to do things that stop you from becoming a total softie. But you have the advantage of being developed to a higher stage so you can find expressions of red that are healthy and balanced.

This is a trait shared by pretty much every dude on here looking for dating advice, myself included hehe

@Marcel I legit think this is one of the most important things to learn to notice, especially when it comes to any kind of socialising. It's soooo soooo easy to start overthinking and overanalysing everything and it can start to destroy your mental state and waste a lot of your time

Viewing yourself as superior, too good and too 'deep' for others is no way to make friends I used that tactic to cope with being shitty at socialising in school for years, it's not healthy. The average person has far more depth than you give them credit for, what you lack are the social skills to bring that out. As do most people, myself included Learning to deeply relate to people who you feel are superficial will grow you enormously, but it requires you accepting that you're no better than they are

Basically, you just have to deal with it and move on, yea. Kinda feels a bit shit but you'll get numbed to it after a while. It's very difficult to come back from being left on read without seeming needy unless you already have some kind of rapport

@hamedsf do you not see the irony here

@Kel Varnsen Kind of yes. I suppose it depends on your reasoning. The argument of 'don't take the vaccine because it's got technology implanted by the elites to control you' or some other similar levels of wackiness is definitely paranoid conspiracy theory stuff. Denying that the vaccine is relatively speaking safe also inherently requires you to claim you know better than the tens of thousands of experts who were involved in designing/testing it which is approaching conspiracy thinking too. I can see a good argument for not taking the vaccine if you're young since it could potentially be riskier than COVID itself to you, that was my opinion originally, but I changed my mind and got it because it just didn't seem like something worth sticking my heels into the mud for. If it wasn't safe then there would be some real indication of that by now beyond some rare side effects which are to be expected. If I saw some evidence of the danger of taking it I'd reconsider. Why don't you think it's safe to take?

You'll have to elaborate here because I have no idea what you mean I respect you for that. Unfortunately what you're claiming can hurt people. When asked to justify it you claim you have some evidence but can't be bothered sharing. And then you blame others for not being open minded towards your idea.

Speaking of 'out of window', do you also believe that you can fly if you jump out of one? Willing to try it? No? So closed minded. Unacceptable. *sarcasm*

@Leo Gura Hahahaha, sorry, I was being sarcastic. The real crime was wasting my time mocking someone for having those beliefs in the first place, it isn't worth it, but it is fun

Because Google, of course, is controlled by the same small group of elites looking to make sure you never find out about the mRNA body modifications we're all being injected with designed to destroy our bodies so that we can no longer effectively produce value for them. Obviously. Now there's a good idea for a Gru meme

Jumping off a cliff = certain death Taking COVID-19 vaccine = ???

Beliefs determine your reality. If you believe wholeheartedly in the blackpill, the blackpill will seem like pure truth to you. And the problem is that blackpill reinforces everything that makes you unattractive. So it's self-fulfilling as well. As a guy you have a lot more control over your value than a girl does, the cost for this is that you start with on-average lower value and increasing it requires time and effort. Sure if you're born lucky the effort required is lower, but this applies to literally everything in life. Even if blackpill was 'true' the kind of people drawn into these communities are not people that are going to increase the quality of your life, stay the fuck away

What you will typically see is a lot of guys saying "I wouldn't fuck a fat chick" while girls will say "I want to date a confident charming successful man". If a girl was going about saying "I would never date some nerdy little weakling with no confidence" she probably wouldn't be that well received either. This is pure speculation on my part, but from my general impression on average girls will talk more about finding positive qualities while guys will talk about avoiding negative ones, and that framing on the whole is what creates the dynamic you experience here. I doubt many people would want to chop your head off for saying you want to date girls you're attracted to or who are skinny or in good shape. The one exception to this is when it comes to height perhaps, I'll give you that. But hey, life's not fair. Does this issue really matter that much in the grand scheme? Double standard are everywhere, you're not gonna make them go away.

I mean, sort of. When it comes to money I would pick it, because money has value to me. But the analogy of a bunch of random salespeople peddling shit you don't want or already have is a good one. Like if I was getting messages from a bunch of girls I really wasn't attracted to every day is that really privilege? Sort of, I suppose. I'd rather have that than nothing. But it wouldn't feel all that great. I don't disagree with you, I just don't think it's worth thinking about really. It's not worth your mental energy. That's my overarching point and the only reason I decided to contribute to this thread in the first place

Lol, she isn't attractive before or after. But I suppose that's my own taste. I mean, yea, the majority of guys only have the requirement that a girl is not overweight. But weigh-loss and maintaining a healthy and fit body are not easy tasks for a lot of girls either. Probably pretty equivalent in difficulty to developing an attractive personality as a guy. There's a lot of weird mental shit and insecurity involved in that as well. How would you know it's easier to develop? This is more of that super theoretical and subtly negative thinking shit that doesn't help anyone. There's a good phrase "Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die". Like I don't disagree with you on this point necessarily, but it really doesn't help you to think about this extensively This argument shit is honestly the biggest waste of time, and I think it's the biggest trap that incel type guys fall into. Why the fuck do you want to sit and argue about what girls want/like/are attracted to? How does that help you? The irony isn't lost on me, I know that's exactly what I'm doing and really it would be more valuable for me to go and do literally anything else. But I do feel that this highly theoretical thought process about dating is a trap I've fallen into and am starting to escape, which is why I feel compelled to share my experience about this

Yes. But is the rich person wrong when they say that money doesn't make you happy? Not necessarily, it's just a different kind of problem from the one we have

@Striving for more Yea this dating shit can uncover some demons. Sounds like whatever you just read hit home somehow, I've been there. Wish you the best man, if you ever want to talk about some stuff PM me and I'd be happy to talk with you