something_else

This^^^

This sounds almost murderous. Pickup is good but when you start sounding a bit like a serial killer take a step back Discussing strategies to 'isolate a girl from her friends' is approaching that territory... You actually sound like a psychopath here. Of course girls are going to be 'attached to security' when they're physically at risk of so much danger, especially in a club It would be weirder if they weren't concerned with their safety If a girl trusts you then she'll follow you. You don't need magical words to counteract the 'i want to go back to my friends' because by that time you've already failed Her being super concerned about going back to her friends is basically her telling you that you haven't built enough trust yet for whatever you're asking her to do, or she just isn't attracted. Either way it's a rejection

It's probably one of the fields with the most abundantly available jobs that there is right now I work as a web developer now btw, sort of full stack so I do frontend and backend. It's not something I want to do forever but it's a fantastic starting point. Good money, usually pretty chill companies, often remote or hybrid working You also learn a lot of the basics of online marketing and design which is great if you want to start your own business in the future In regards to online courses, I've never taken one. But I did do CS at uni and it taught me nothing about web development Having a good portfolio of personal projects was what made me stand out when applying for my first web dev job. If online courses expose you to the job market and let you build up a decent portfolio of projects, then they're probably worth it

I get the sense you think this is a bad thing Often a POV based on intuition and feeling can be correct even if you can't necessarily find the logic to spell it out

How is this different? Owning your frame, displaying confidence are indicators that you're in fact not a loser or a virgin. If you delivered that line confidently I guarantee you 95%+ of girls would assume you were joking

You're being too literal By confidently proclaiming that you're a shy virgin you actually give the impression that you're the exact opposite It's not about the literal words you say, it's how they're said

Just do that material stuff while you're young and you can Figuratively, you want to be the rich person who understands that money can't make them happy rather than the poor person coping with the fact they don't have money by saying money can't make you happy Replace money with most material pursuits you desire and this still works

Depending on what media you consume, it's not all bad. For example if you watch a whole bunch of YouTube or social media you can end up being exposed to a lot of new ideas Although this is less the case now because these algorithms are designed to feed you more and more of the same They also help you keep up to date with current trends Back when I was 15-16 (6-7 years ago) YT + video games ended up being the motivation for me to learn programming and now I work as a software engineer. Between aged 15-18 almost all the code I wrote was mods for video games that me and my virtual friends played. Frankly these were some of the best years of my life thus far and I gained many invaluable lessons from these years, yet they felt like pure fun Having said that, such a path at my current age would likely just be time wasted. It's tricky to balance

Yes. Don't pester women going about their day in environments that aren't normally that sociable like a street or a mall At least don't make a habit of it, do it if you're out naturally and see a girl you find attractive If you wanna spam approach girls go to a club, it's basically why they exist

Note that I said no such thing. I simply suggested that you could if you wish and may be happier as a result Speak to many traditional, conservative old people and they will often tell you that they regret how rigid they were in earlier life and wished they'd explored more before settling down in like their early twenties. That is essentially them regretting not developing to a more orangey lifestyle when they were younger. I'm pretty sure the two bits of advice I've had from most of the older generation I know is 'go explore the world' and 'dont settle down too early' Uhm. There can be. If you're a pedophile that's an incredibly toxic preference I know what you mean, but if you have unhealthy preferences it can be very toxic for you and those around you Marriage is a dying concept. I have no plans of getting married. Why the fuck do I need the government in my relationship? I'll settle down with someone I love but I'm not getting married, I find the whole idea of marriage dumb as shit, especially if you're a dude If you actually love the person you are with you can make it work without involving the government. Problem is if your partner is chosen for you or you settle down early there's a very very high chance that you aren't suited and thus you need the government to introduce barriers to prevent you from separating. Pickup exists to allow men to sort through partners until they find one they truly match with. Women don't really need pickup for this, they just need to explore and find the best man they can

Get that stick out of your ass

What is it about loud music settings you don't like? If you really hate these then your other options are to make some friends, go do activities you enjoy, meet girls that way If you can't go to busy sociable places and you can't build a social circle then yea celibacy is probably your only option lol. But I'd recommend you instead try pushing your comfort zones and see what happens You sound a little bit like you have the "I'm above partying and socialising" attitude that I used to have when I was in high school to justify myself being kind of a loner. Holy fuck I'm glad I got over that

The part about your argument that I find weird is that you're dead set on the stage blue ideal while acknowledging that there are stages above, or other perspectives that are generally more developed Are you planning on creating the perfect stage blue life? Sure, by all means try to do that. But you're acknowledging that there are perhaps better ways to live and rather than trying to develop towards those you are digging your heels in the mud with family values ideology. And that heel-digging goes against what most people in this forum are here for which is development I refuse to accept that there are not orange, green and yellow people or relationships in India. Why not construct such a relationship? It sounds like the girl you're with is certainly beyond blue, why not rise with her? Or why not move to a country where such a thing is more mainstream? That is the advice you will receive here because this is a forum about development! Or you can stick your heels in the mud at blue if that's where you feel like you should be. Of course there's nothing wrong with it, you can live your life however you please. But why not aspire to further development?

I think this is a good exercise. I struggle with eye contact sometimes and doing this has helped a lot

It also fucks over hospitality venues financially as well. I live in Scotland in the UK and Scotland decided to close nightclubs and sports events for the past three weeks while England did not, so it's been a good test of how impactful closing nightclubs is as almost everything else about our cultures is very similar In the past three weeks there has been almost no difference at all in covid rates between Scotland and England, which suggests that closing these venues has had little effect at all If you close nightclubs people will just go to big house parties instead where you can't even enforce vaccine passports to get in

Yea it's really cool to see some real life Leo But I'm also jealous because all our nightclubs here have been shut again

Pretty much universally out of insecurity Look at huge male celebrities or other high value men, do you think they give a single fuck about whether the 10/10 model they're sleeping with or dating has slept with 20+ other dudes? No because they've slept with more girls You only have to try and control your girls' sexuality if you feel like you're inadequate for her

I know that's what you were doing, thank you I'm just particularly bitter about this topic hahaha

Or I could have more friends and far better social skills Like 90%+ of people who party in uni don't end up addicted to anything or ruining their lives, they have a great time, make friends and let loose Also who takes opiates at a party? Is that a thing anywhere? It's mostly coke + weed I see and neither appeal to me at all really

Not taking advantage of any social opportunities in university/college I spent ~3 years of it in a mediocre relationship doing nothing socially, and the remaining year was fucked up by covid I ended up leaving having not connected with a single new person at uni in 4 years. Don't be like me

I'm sure there are some valid points here but capitalising every word makes my brain immediately not want to read any of this fyi I struggle to imagine how fapping twice a month can hurt your mental health, but hey, each to their own. Going from twice a month to zero is a much easier road than a lot of dudes who jerk off twice a day would have at least

I agree. I don't like calling it pickup, there are many bad connotations. Viewing it as learning to socialise, attract girls and develop your masculinity is a healthier frame. And of course a guy should absolutely have other things going on in their life besides trying to attract girls, and should not move to a city solely for picking up girls. We agree on that. My only remaining question to you then is: What is the alternative to something like pickup? Should the guys who can't attract girls just accept their fait and rot away in their own loneliness?

This is the dating section, what do you expect? The other sections don't talk about this kinda stuff, there's plenty of spirituality there What do you suggest guys do, repress and deny their sexual urges? Sit at home alone for the rest of their lives? Of course I have other things I want in life, I imagine almost every guy here does. But for many, lack of relationships and contact with girls is a huge problem that stops them from doing other things in their life

You're either a girl or you're a dude with a low sex drive Good luck doing anything productive as a guy if you don't have sex at least semi-regularly Having said that I agree that moving to a place solely for pickup is bad, you want to choose a place that has all round good qualities. Great nightlife, decent population, good prices, good people. But girls are always gonna be high on the priority list for guys

The metroplex includes the population around the city that the big city still serves. For example all the people who live 10 miles out of a city who want to go on a night out should also be included in population estimate for something like pickup since they'll all commute into the big city for it