something_else

I don’t mind the music at all, in fact I like it. But I hate the dress style and how popular it is here

Getting broken up with for sure, I know I’m capable of handling it but the other person’s reaction is unpredictable I usually struggle to have the balls to break up with girls, I often end up just becoming distant or letting things start to fizzle out which is very unhealthy and often crueler Though my first GF was heavily suicidal and threatened (and sort of attempted) to kill herself after we broke up so I definitely have some trauma there

It sounds like you were being very clingy A lot of girls find it very claustrophobic and get repelled by it heavily I don't really think this is anything to do with keeping your word. That sounds like a very bizarre way to justify the clinginess to me. It's time for you to move on and find someone else, my dude

Sounds like it could be a shit club, try somewhere else. In my experience people had a great time in every single club I’ve ever been to unless it was either dead or it was a sausage fest Though I would also be careful that you aren’t projecting out your own dislike of the place onto others If you have a busy club tightly packed with drunk people in my experience it’s hard for no one to be having a good time If you have that many high and drunk people, exciting shit’s always going down somewhere in the room The way to enjoy clubs is to embrace the chaos, that’s what makes them fun. Anything can happen. Don’t leave every 10 minutes, embrace the chaos head on, go right into the centre of the dance floor, that’s where a lot of the fun people are And learning to approach girls and have them be receptive in busy clubs is a really different skill set to talking to girls in day to day life, which might be why you felt they weren’t receptive Also, numbers (or snap in my case) from a club have never worked well for me. I’ve always aimed for something that night. I think almost every girl I’ve ever snapped after meeting on a night out has blanked me super quick

Sorry, I wasn’t that clear. I wasn’t trying to say mechanical sex was important, I was saying that the mechanics of sex are important Of course you flirt first and have space for foreplay, both of those are super important But so are the actual mechanics of penetration

I switched to MacOS recently for work, and it's fucking amazing by comparison to Linux and Windows I was a Linux user previously. MacOS feels like a much more reliable and polished version of Linux. You can do all the same stuff you can do on Linux, but it doesn't break once a year for no discernable reason requiring a full reinstall Basically, it has the best parts of both of Windows and Linux It does have some quirkiness that is designed to make you use Apple peripherals, but other than that I love it

Yea, I do agree that deciding to move on if sex hasn't happened after one date is definitely a bit much. I would say if it hasn't happened after two dates, that's when I'd start to seriously consider moving on. If she can't work out whether she wants to have sex by the second date, we're probably not going to be compatible. I want to go for girls who are immediately very attracted to me after just one or two dates, I want the attraction to be raw, pure, obvious and passionate. If it's taking her three or more dates to get attracted, then IMO the attraction is not strong enough and I'd feel like I'm wasting both our time by pursuing it any further I know that girls who connect with me quickly like that are out there, so I go looking for them instead of girls who can't make their mind up about me I think this is the essence of what @Knowledge Hoarder was getting at

You can research good places in your city online. Or even just walk through your city on a Friday and Saturday night and see which places are busy, filled with people in your age range Or, you can use my strategy, tell her: "let's meetup and walk about till we find somewhere for a drink" You could then have somewhere in mind and walk her there, or just actually explore the city together and look for a place that you both like The other plus side of this is that there's usually less tension when you walk and talk than when you sit across a table from each other, so walking a bit is a nice way to start a date

I agree with you, but your thinking is too black and white. You're talking like there are only two options: mechanical sex or intimate sex. Why not just get good at both? That's what good sex is, the blending of two people's psyche and bodies into one. There is a mental and a physical component and you need both

Follow the "show don't tell" rule: don't tell her she's pretty, show that you're attracted to her with your body language and tone. Think about it, would you rather a girl just told you that she thought you were cute, or would you rather see her dialed pupils staring lustfully at you, her leaning in close to you across the table, playing with her hair, giggling at everything you say? What creates a stronger emotional response in you? Or compliment something unique about her that she won't get a lot of compliments about. People love compliments about things they've worked hard on but they feel don't get appreciated Or you be playfully super sexually direct with your compliments Those are some options, but I think generic compliments often come across quite inauthentic and boring

I think the point being made was that if a man values sex highly, then he doesn't want a girl who's going to use sex as a tool, withhold it, and play games around it. If I were going on dates with a girl and she didn't want to have sex after three dates I know we're not compatible based upon that alone, I want her to be burning with the desire to fuck me and it shouldn't take more than a date or two at most for that chemistry to be built It isn't wrong or disgusting for men to value and prioritise sex when dating

I’ve had my fair share of sexual experiences Purely mechanical sex can still be stimulating, but emotional, lovey-dovey sex without good mechanics is always awful It doesn’t matter how much you love a girl, if you cum in 15 seconds, or don’t hit the right spots, the sex isn’t gonna be good

As I said, there’s a mechanical and emotional component to sex Good sex needs both

I mean ideally it’s both, there’s a mechanical and an emotional component to good sex

Good. Drop that shit, you are worth way more than that just by being on a forum like this

Kind of, the idea of an influencer is very narcissistic and it’s what a surprisingly large number of kids aspire to now But I actually don’t think that’s a bad thing. Aspiring to be someone who provides value to others isn’t bad, but a lot of influencers really just want cold hard cash And they’re often willing to convert your self esteem into said cold hard cash

Findom is like one of the most degenerate communities there is, I hope you’re not actually paying girls money for nothing

Apparently the deal is now on hold pending twitter lying about user counts

Is it? I’d disagree, but that’s my preference Most porn is designed to be addicting, it’s mass appealing, it’s what most dudes want to see. But the average dude is prob like a 35-40 year old, so most mainstream porn is designed for that demographic Younger people will find that inauthentic and fake and search for amateur instead Some mainstream porn is really good, but generally I’d say most younger audiences go for slightly more amateurish content, hence the popularity of OnlyFans

It sounds like you have a lot of very chaotic thoughts Three things I noticed: You look like a fairly young guy, and many of the things you have tried are not quick fixes. They take time to work. Often years. You've tried a lot of different things. It's usually better to focus deep on one or two things that are most important to you for several years, rather than jumping around. You clearly want to be better with girls, I'd start with that. Talk to tons of girls Spirituality isn't so great for curing insecurity on its own, you will probably need to cure that with more traditional means before you start spitirual work The best antidote to insecurity from being bullied by other dudes is surrounding yourself with dudes stronger (physically and mentally) than the ones that bullied you and seeing how they live their life. This is one way to develop masculinity. Something like martial arts or any kind of beginner friendly sport is great for that In school, I was pathetic, introverted, kinda lonely, bullied, etc. but I feel much more confident in myself now The three things that helped me most: Moving into my own place Going out every weekend and hardcore socialising BJJ (Braziliian Jiu Jitsu)

Oh my sweet summer child Seriously, get off dating apps. They will crumble your self-esteem as you fight and struggle for scraps of low-quality women You could prob get yourself a decent profile that gets you some matches, but it will take a lot of work that's better spent in the real world If you want honest feedback on your profile, go to r/tinder and post your profile in the weekly review. Or put your pics on photofeeler

hypnogram.xyz is another one of these. It often even understands pop-culture references, lol

My man, you're overcomplicating things. Go outside, talk to girls, and stop thinking about weird or obscure stuff relating to attracting girls. You're being too theoretical, practice is king

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure your body continually produces semen regardless of whether or not you ejaculate? So surely it makes no difference to energy levels?

No one hates you for no reason. The default stance most people take when meeting new people is to like them You have to do something to make people hate you Being socially awkward isn't usually enough to make people hate you, but your anxiety/insecurity convinces you it is "I hate me, so of course they hate me" I have a similar loop of thinking and it's very annoying. A few practical things that helped me realise how bullshit that thinking is: Going to the same social places everyday: coffee shop is a great example. I'm socially awkward as fuck sometimes, so I've done plenty of weird things when small talking with the people at the local coffee shop. But I'm a regular, I go every day, and they are all still super nice to me. They even asked me to write a note in a card for one of their staff members when they were leaving, which shocked me because I was dead certain they thought I was a creepy weirdo who they had to put up with coming to work in their coffee shop and pretend to be nice to. And then I was convinced the note I wrote would be weird, and they'd hate me for it. And they were still lovely to me. The hatred was in my head Going to some kind of sport with lots of people regularly. In my case, jiu-jitsu. Every time I trained with someone, I was convinced they hated me if they weren't super nice to me. Again, I'm awkward as fuck and I'm not really a typical sporty athlete so I don't fit in there. But again just by sheer chance of being there enough, I've met several people who are super friendly towards me for no reason other than we've been in close proximity. Even though I was super awkward I think the main thing for you to realise is that being introverted, shy and awkward does not make people hate you. It won't make people like you, but it won't make them hate you either