When a girl falls in love with you, she's falling specifically in love with YOU, not just "a guy". She wants you, not anyone else. The idea of finding better guys is not even in her mind because she already sees you as the one for her.
Girls are loyal to a fault.
Stop making up victim narratives and go approach girls. You will see that at least 1/20 girls will be attracted to you if you develop a bit of game.

Yes, commitment is emotionally challenging because commitment only makes sense from the POV of an attractive guy with many options if the girl is exceptional. There is little desire to commit to an average girl.
For commitment to make sense she has to be really amazing. But most girls are not that.
Also, commitment means losing years not developing one's game. And the longer a guy wait to development one's game, the harder it becomes. Also the sex and even the relationship will start to get stale after some years unless special measures are taken. So there is a fear that commitment will lead to mediocrity.
Having very high standards makes commitment very challenging. In a sense commitment requires surrendering or lowering one's standards.
From the male POV, sex is a daily requirement but commitment requires something exceptional. Which is why guys tend to have sex but not commit. If a guy waited to only have sex with girls he was willing to commit to, he would be starving like a homeless dog waiting for years for the right girl to come along. And then he would fuck that up with neediness.
So ironically girls are attracted to the guys who are least likely to commit. These are the guys who have so many options that commitment makes little sense. Because a guy who doesn't have all those options will be super needy and repel most girls. You girls are attracted to the most detached guys, and then you wonder why he won't commit.
The guy who would commit to you, you have no interest in sleeping with. He doesn't make you wet or emotional. And your sleeping decisions are purely emotional, not logical. Hence you keep hooking up with guys who won't commit.
The more arousing the guy the less likely he is to commit. That's how this game works. You have to find some sort of balancing point. You can't just chase the highest arousal. You have to make sacrifices. You can't get it all unless you are bringing massive value to the negotiating table.
Sex is a value exchange. And everyone is trying to leech maximum value. Everyone is trying to get something for nothing. And then suffering ensues of course because leeching and theft are self-undermining.
In a sense, when you are dating you are trying to steal sexual value. You aren't doing this consciously, but subconsciously that's exactly what all your arousal and emotions are doing. Your emotions precisely motivate behaviors which steal sexual value. This survival mechanic is so deep that you aren't even aware it's happening. To you it just feels like romance. When you get super attracted to a guy so much that you can't stop daydreaming about him, that's because you know he has more value than you, and that locking him down would be a really good deal for you. It's like walking into a car dealership and seeing your favorite car 50% off. You are giddy with joy at the bargain you just found and you want to pounce on it immediately before someone else does. But of course no quality car is ever 50% off unless there is something seriously wrong with it.
Bottom line: If you want the best car in the dealership you should expect to work hard and pay a lot for it. If you don't want to pay a lot, then expect a mediocre car. Madness is expecting the best car for dirt cheap.
Men's commitment phobia is their emotional way of maximizing sexual value.