Moon

generalizing but Italian men embrace their femininity but are still seen as sexy (often because they are more feminine/romantic)...and that's the kinda vibe you are

Yeah so maybe in that case you didn't have the right balance, including being assertive with what you wanted for your own pleasure too (which in itself is a masculine trait) If you were getting what you wanted, would you have enjoyed eating her out? Or were you not as attracted to her as you thought you were, or just don't enjoy the act? Do you have a low sex drive or low testosterone? That's quite unfair that you were willing to change and try out what she wanted but she wouldn't do the same It's a difficult one...I'd say either stay how you are and find girls like your first girlfriend OR find a balance between asserting your own needs and wants but also developing yourself through research and practice to be more masculine in bed?

Amazing Enlightenment is the end of seeking...

I was just going through my youtube history... I searched "Leo" in Dec 2014 lmao, I also searched "anxiety meditation" a dozen times before this but from my memory I found Actualized.org a year or two earlier than that when I was dealing more intensely with depression and negative thought cycles, maybe watched vids on and off during these years, can't remember precisely But when I was around 18 or 19 I realized how much Actualized.org had helped me and how valuable it was compared to other channels I'd come across

@Akemrelax yeah very good points, ah I guess you probably are best described by a couple of them? not to blow my own horn but my strengths are both of the INFJ and INTP (after a decent amount of personal development work) but yeah I'm finding this 16P quite limiting @Himanshu Ooh yeah was wondering what people meant by those letters, so it's good you brought up the judging axes stuff. Well I come from an introverted childhood so I'd be finding my extroverted side if that's who I am @electroBeam Thanks. Yeah so I thought I had some idea of who I was with regards to my past shaping me to do certain things etc, but I guess I've just been doing personal development on myself without *truly* knowing who I am I think I will begin contemplating myself about my "true" nature before I consider these other theories then and try to be aware of my own biases and motives too Yeah good point about burnout... I've had studying burnout before but because socializing felt fun- I didn't even think about needing "breaks"/time for myself until the evenings, that was probably one of my mistakes

@Akemrelax thanks! I will defo have a look into the theories deeper and good tips after spending more time thinking about it today...I think I was being delusional whilst answering the questions and an INFJ-A fits me much better (one of its weaknesses was also easily burning out lol) but yeah I don't really know my true self, I think I was projecting who I wanted to be like the stuff the site says about INFJs are kinda scarily accurate for me, and the idea of them being thought of as "quiet extraverted personality types" due to the ability to make connections with others (despite being intraverted) really makes sense to me

IMO, key things such as open mindedness, and being into self development (consciously or not) are key things in a long term relationship partner If they are stage blue but open minded to other ideas and growth, it could perhaps work... But I personally think "opposite attracts" works more in the context of different personality types or a few different interests rather than something like huge differences in spiral dynamics stages

Yeah, I don't know much about pickup but the most attractive/confident/funny guys I've seen are able to socialize well with anyone and aren't trying hard to "pick up" but they'll end up getting girls effortlessly just by being social and putting themselves out there without desperate neediness of wanting sex as the outcome

Why aren't enlightened people omniscient and omnipotent then too...if we are all "One"

@JayG84 @Serotoninluv Love the analogies! V helpful

Yess I remember it as omnibenevolent instead of morally perfect ofc we're not talking about the Judeo-Christian God, but is this idea of love seen as "morally perfect" then? or is God neither omnipotent, omniscient and morally perfect? and just "Love"

Fictional, but a mostly stage red land being taken over by stage blue religion, getting rid of all "sin" Especially when arresting the gay prince: - "Ser Loras Tyrell, you have broken the laws of Gods and Men" ~ 'Who do you think you are?' - "Justice"

I don't know who this woman is but saw this video a few weeks ago, but her dad seems like a sociopath? Smirking? Whilst she talks about the fucked up abuse...stage red? (Man walked in like Freddy Krueger LOOOL ffs) Another example of Red is most of the places in Game of Thrones, pretty much everyone is a murderer in it- but there is still a distinction between "good" and "bad" red. For example, Arya Stark is a character who has a list of people she wants to kill and frequently repeats the list to herself- very stage red? But she is loved by fans as a "hero" for her great fighting skills and for her "justified" killing - killing off the bad people basically. (There are also great examples of stage purple and beige within in it too- since there are so many different groups/locations within the series)

Yes fair enough, good points but agree to disagree

I used to agree with this Very unpopular opinion: but SOMETIMES (v rarely) a relationship can thrive after such an incident...there's a big difference between a serial cheater and a terrible mistake The decision comes from evidence that the person is both willing to change and is taking actual action to prevent such situations again and amazing open, honest communication from then on has to be a major component of the relationship

I'm so sorry that you're in this situation, it sounds very extreme and I can't imagine how many inner struggles you guys must have gone through by being exposed to this toxic environment My dad had some anger issues whilst I was growing up but nothing as bad as this and did often apologize- but he continues to be angry sometimes, especially to my mum- and she definitely has issues because of it, but I'm working on them with her (and hopefully I'll be able to speak to my dad about his soon) However, in your situation it just sounds like he would need professional help- but he doesn't sound like he wants to change. So if he doesn't, imo the best thing would be for the sake of you, your mum and sister would be for you guys to try to get financially independent from him or help from the government if possible? I'm not sure how much help you can get in Canada Honestly, I don't know your full story but maybe your mum could try to work if she's able to? I know this can be difficult if she's always been dependent on her husband or he hasn't let her work or whatever. There's many free online courses and qualifications available online right now because of the COVID-19 situation- so maybe that could help her with getting certain jobs?

What do you mean by this? Like being completely open minded to this new reality?

I like this part especially. I think pure love also enables us to tackle problems for the root cause, e.g. "What help do police truly need to be able to reform?" *Saves quote* I'd say I'm mostly stage green but I've started to understand the idea of higher Self-Love *in theory* better which has helped me solve some of my own problems without fully *experiencing* it... @Leo Gura are you constantly immersed in this Love now? or do you have more work to do?

Go for it if it's bothering you that much I considered changing my name once, since having an "Islamic" name leaves more room for discrimination...but decided to keep it. I thought If I ever lose out on a job over something like this, isn't that a blessing in disguise? Avoided a toxic work environment hehe

but WHY would that happen? That sounds terrifying to me lol... like the higher stages just makes everyone in society mentally insane or something, because surely moving up the spiral would allow us to save the planet and society etc? like is Leo just crazy? idk? is it actually the truth? I'm a bit ignorant perhaps with spiritually cos I do have some fear but off topic Interesting though...

Exactly. The same way stage blue Muslims aren't green for not wanting Islamophobia. @IJB063 I suggest watching this video that was recently posted on the stage yellow spiral dynamics thread, although I still saw the riots as somewhat "understandable", the video gave a better perspective of why it's happening (Also just an assumption- I'm seeing you as a "logical" guy @IJB063 so I can see why you're resisting stage green...you can go through stage green without being an overly angry SJW though- empathy is what you're lacking- meditation grew mine more but psychs are probs a better way)

https://news.sky.com/story/george-floyd-family-urge-people-to-do-this-another-way-and-vote-rather-than-cause-violence-11998827 (have a look at the video) For less privileged folk (due to race or class etc), even if stage blue are more likely to vote more "consciously" (even if for "selfish" reasons) but often don't because of lack of education or interest in politics. Love this response to counteract the impulsive but understandable rioting! Edit: an underprivileged person in today's society in the US is likely to still have access to the internet- a stark advantage to the rioters from the previous century,a movement spreading the notion of education over violence would be truly impactful (e.g. how Cardi B's collab with Bernie Sanders introduced politics to a whole new crowd)

Edit: you said 5 skills: -a good studying habit and studying skills (non formal learning- for reading books or working on a project like coding) -social/interpersonal skills -visualization and strategic thinking -emotional "mastery" and understanding your psychology -financial literacy (will give you the freedom to live by those values) and to aid you with such things and more, looking after your health (good sleep, diet, meditation, exercise etc) I have a lot of work to do though haha

Amazing. Empathy without being overly emotional or "triggered", interesting

Yes of course but baby steps... As you say it's complex so how are these rioters supposed to turn from this violence to the grand "solution" At least this alternative is a better trajectory imo and gives these people a "voice" instead of burning down businesses of their own people. If "green" + politicians gain more power, this is closer to the reformation of the US police and prison systems becoming a priority rather than more of the "When the looting starts, the shooting starts" mentality. They should be punished with psychedelics