Gianna

Amazing! This was very helpful to read. Thank you for sharing ☺️?

Settle off into open waters All alone, you’re the only author Take apart everything they taught ya’ And go live like there’s no one other than you

I love that! Especially 2 & 3. I, personally, would change 1. to AND Consciousness (both instead of balance). Balance feels a bit limiting to me. We need not limit in an abundant life.

We die to be born. We abandon ourselves to find ourselves. We find ourselves to know ourselves. And we forget ourselves to remember ourselves. Why must we go through so much pain to find love? Why must we be in so much denial to find change? To finally understand? If I understand you, I can understand me. If I understand me, I can understand you. And yet, our survival blinds us to each other. Our fear blinds us to ourselves. And our grief blinds us to reconciliation. Let us unite in separation. Let us love in grief. Let us hold our fear and fear our love. For our love feels like risk, and our risk is our deepest sign of bravery.

Great inquiry! I think this is spot on! Nice analysis ?

@Javfly33 that is very possible. if you are telling yourself that then it is most likely true for you. Why else would this thought be in your experience?

You are living this life because you were once curious about the experience of this life. Reconnect with the curiosity within you and you will inevitably reconnect with your curiosity about life. This curiosity about life was the initial question and your life is the answer. If you are over it, then it is time to come up with a new question. What do you want to know about yourself? How do you want to experience yourself?

You need to get rid of your resistance to victim mentality. It is only through allowing victimhood into your experience that you can transcend it. It is not until you accept both the perpetrator and the victim within you that you will cease to experience it in reality.

A home is belonging. Belonging is a feeling state that is so inherent to our being that when you lose it I believe it can be one of the most debilitating traumas. I would do inner journey work into when you lost your feeling of belonging. And maybe see if it was around the time that you had left that house. You can do visualization to reintegrate aspects of you that were lost or left in that house. Regardless, you do not need to physically go back or be back in that house to reconnect with the feeling place of belonging. Belonging is so inherent to our being that it is not something that can actually ever leave you or be lost or taken away. It is literally equivalent to trying to take the paper out of paper– no matter if you shred it up into tiny pieces, each piece still holds the inherent 'paper' within it– just as you inherently hold yourself within you. It can never not be with you.

Shyness is about not allowing yourself to be fully expressed. I would self-inquire into which aspects of yourself you are suppressing/not allowing. I would then try to find a way to love these parts genuinely. I would also find ways to authentically express these parts in your own comfortable way/safe place. Practicing to allow these parts might help with the shyness over time because you will not be in as much resistance towards them.

When we want to do bad things to people it is because we are wanting to create empathy. Only from a place of chronic isolation, rejection, or ostracization do we want to harm others to create a place of connection and understanding. In other words, we think that if we hurt others they will then be able to see and understand our pain and that will cause them not only to connect with us but to also not be able to continue to hurt us/cause us pain. Of course, there is a more aligned/harmonious way to create connection and understanding with others. If I were you, I would figure out what it is that you really need (usually it is an emotional need) and then I would introduce a solution to meet that need to the part of you that wants to harm others. I would then work to get that need met from a conscious/intentional state.

It can be hard to tell the difference between when we are resisting and when our emotions are actually trying to guide us, point us in a direction, and thus, communicate with us. For instance, in this scenario, maybe your anxiety was trying to tell you to not go in that direction, to not take action, or that taking action would lead to a negative result. Any time we take action out of a negative feeling state we are inviting a negative result. This is because negative emotion is often an indicator that we are out of alignment with ourselves/ with our being. And so any subsequent action taken from an unaligned place (i.e a negative thought place or emotional state) will lead to an unaligned or negative outcome. We cannot expect to take action out of a negative/unaligned state and receive a positive/aligned outcome. So if your emotional response to the thought, "I should go out there" was negative (like anxiety) then that was your cue to not go in the direction of that thought (to not go out there). Let's say instead of anxiety, as a result to that thought you felt excitement– then that would be an indicator that you should follow through with that thought (act on it; go out there). Your anxiety was telling you what you need to do, but often times we instead bulldoze our own emotional guidance system because we think we need to overcome our resistance. Our resistance does not need to be bulldozed/overcome, it needs to be understood. Only through understanding can we come back into alignment with our core selves/being. Also recognize that if you get an emotional response– like anxiety– following a thought like, "you should go out there," that means that a part of you is not on board and is potentially afraid to go out there. In other words, you had a part of you that didn't want to go out there but you forced it to go out there anyway. If you force yourself to do something that a part of you doesn't want to do, then that not only leads to self-trust issues it also leads to low-self esteem and self-confidence issues. Only when we act out of a place of complete and total 100% alignment with all of our being it is possible to have both a positive result and a positive relationship with ourselves. I think this experience is a great learning opportunity to always have your own back, to act only when you are in alignment, and to trust your emotional guidance system and discern between when you feel resistance and when your incredible body is offering you guidance (it is– after all– connected to everything that is and therefore has access to insight unavailable to the logical mind).

If you need to lay in bed all day, then lay in bed all day. Your judgement towards what you should/shouldn't be doing is the only problem here. When we judge we are not allowing the natural unfolding of being. Maybe being in bed is exactly what you need to realign with yourself, to re-enlighten. Maybe your body is trying to communicate something to you. You do not need to take antidepressants to numb out the incredible wisdom your body is communicating to you. You need to listen to it and you need to trust yourself. Trust your body and stop telling yourself that you should or shouldn't be living a certain way. Antidepressants are not the answer.

When you give something meaning you reject what it is. When you label something you reject what it is. You reject what it is because what it is is not what you label it. It is not what you make it mean. The label is the label and the meaning is the meaning. And neither of these things are what that something is. And so you are making that something into something it is not; which is to say you are not accepting it for what it is. If you call a tree a tree, it will say back to you, "Why are you refusing to love me?" It will ask, "Can't you just love me for what I am?" You dishonor something by labeling it. You dishonor something making it mean something. You would think that giving something meaning is honoring it. But you are only explaining it away. Why must it have meaning for you to love it? To accept it? To honor it? What is so wrong with it prior to anything you assign it? When you make something mean something, it is almost like you are stripping it away from its nature. You are confining something that does not need to be confined nor want to be confined because its nature is unconfining. And so you are not accepting its nature which means you are not accepting it. It will wonder why you can't accept it. Why you can't sit with it, be it, unite with it, for simply what it is and not for what it is not. It will wonder why you have to remain separate from it by adding something in between you. Am I really that unlovable? It will wonder. Am I really that unworthy?

@RickyFitts @Raptorsin7 Hehe, yes I think what Ricky wrote is perfect!!! He has so much knowledge in this area. I often turn to him for advice on the matter! hehe. I would agree with him, becoming intimate with those feelings is everything. Become the feeling itself. Let yourself be the feeling without trying to do anything. Simply reside in it, even though it's scary and uncomfortable. With enough of your consciousness attending it– as ricky suggests– it will release in its own time. Still trying to work on these things myself though!! hehe.

let us know what you find!! I would love it if you made a thread on it with your findings and contemplations related to PTSD! I think it would be super helpful for those of us with ptsd.

@RickyFitts Glad you find it useful Ricky

Dissociation. Dissociation ranges on a scale from 'dozing off' or 'zoning out' all the way to complete dissociation from experience like a 'black out' you get when you reach a certain level of drunk.

On 10/22/2021 at 6:27 AM, aetheroar said: The emotion is like solidity in the body...it’s connected to a dualistic mindset about the emotion which is in the form of a belief system in the mind. On 10/22/2021 at 6:27 AM, aetheroar said: Imagine the emotional system as a sort of AI machine that primes the body with hormones that correspond to whatever one believes the emotion means. On 10/22/2021 at 6:27 AM, aetheroar said: The way out is to recognize the emotions are a complete non-duality, that they are simply energy moving in its various flavors, and maintain mindfulness during the experience so that the original mindset can be overwritten.

- Suppressed emotions are contractions; energetic held-ness. - When you continuously suppress an emotion it becomes 'a part of you'; a part of your 'personality' (energetic vibration); when you resist an emotion you're resisting yourself, rejecting yourself. - Rejection leads to hate. Self-rejection leads to self-hate. It is also self-abandonment.

Cover emotions Hate: Rejection, Hurt Anger: Powerlessness, Entrapment, Fear Rage: Helplessness, Rejection, Hurt Sadness: Disappointment, Hurt Desperation: Despair Numbness: Shock, Confusion

Love is bringing something in (union). Fear is pushing something away (rejection). Shame is pushing yourself away (internal fragmentation).