Twenty

When you know everything. Basically knowing.

raid ? And I just found out in my sister's book she misspelled 'EMERAID' This is back in 2010

It kinda is. Or else someone else are gonna take their state.

Idk from what I remember, understanding is not preferable , it is at the end of the state. I'd rather be in it than understand it from outside the (mental) state. Either way the thing that I'm going to do would be the same anyway. If you could choose to do something A state can move you to action. Understanding would be just understanding. Back then I would say - God will be the Witness , but now it is just between you and me. They would do as they wishes. 12:38 okay so now look, they changed it again. They have access to what I've wrote this earlier and was talking what I've written here.

I wasn't into paranormal. But more to like the whole c is against me. We are all in oneness. They are spreading ideologies /picking up a fight with a loud speaker. This is what had been happening. And when my mind would stop thinking they'd too would stop. This is the kind of situation I've been in. And the people next door can intrude into my mind/dream. Emptying my mind. I know, I know wht to do. But now I hv regained my mind. Okay now it was particularly a messed up thing. It felt like Friday evening at a Sunday night. I wake up a little bit just now. I don't feel good because they seemed short lived. And I felt like it was a borrowed culture not a local. Kinda ugly. I don't wanna have those here. This had always been a problem. When they want to provide you

What have changed between yesterday and today? I got to know what was supposed to be Before this, when I was God I was driven by intuition. Eventhough I didn't know why or understand nothing , I know that it is not right. Or wrong. I will have hatred love and everything in between. Simply know what to do. Is a given. But now as I understand what was supposed to be .

I don't love life I love Reality.

Death

I know of my sins eating is my sins

Having the highest Omniscient. (I can say this because I've just lost it) My day goes by , day by day getting worser.

For me when I started my life purpose is a given

There is only an authentic self

Of (everything) how it happened.

The people of the past. The previous me is more superior than I am now.

It is good to divide yourself based on race and skin colours / regions. 11/1/22

Where you will go to after you die will be ascary place I think. I have a bad experience with someone who had Hindus roots. Totally fucked up. Yes. I remember having a lot of dreams. India is the scariest. When you wanna get inside a home, wash your feet (my mom was dropping me here) and I see a lot of visuals/rituals that are unlike what im used to. So it was a scary experience.

This. And my fam. I don't know how dangerous it could be, I can only see.

Yes. I purposefully did not watch horror movies or the news (high school & below) no blood or car accident that I witnessed. But in the end I think you'd have to face it too I guess.

Getting into the third page, "Who's father figure?" , which mother figure? I could barely answer some questions as it is something that I never think about. But mine was dismissive/avoidant I had a few stages growin up that it wasn't all just one phase. I could barely remember by now...

Stuck with my fam's idiocy/city fight and now I end up having a bad sight.

Not an obligation but a responsbility. For something previously unknown to you.

Back then, my neighbours are two guys in a gym room lifting weight. Now it was an orphanage. There had been some burning happening, demolishing house and a renovated house. .... I don't wanna bring my experience from another place here... The vast things that have happened..

Mother, father, and a good night sleep

Fear is a very real thing. The only thing that make you not fear is that you forgot.

@Someone here I learned about life and death. How and why people died. Learning history, the world history got directly downloaded in my consciousness I am the third daughter and I got two younger brothers. Knowing that my first sister had been feeding me poisons. And that I shouldn't accept anything that my mother gave me. (Back then)