Loba

@Leo Gura Maybe in the future this would be an option, I have bipolar 1 and am on medication for it and am stable at the moment and would not want to mess that up, I'd have to go off the meds - but for those who are not on meds and are mentally healthy that would probably work, I have tried shrooms in the past and did notice that they arranged my psyche more holistically while I was on them but was too young at the time and knew nothing of spirituality to really use them right. Someday I'll try again but that won't be for a few years at least. How does a psychedelic heal bonding traumas?

Hello, I am a woman but I have commitment anxiety, and a fearful-ambivalent personality/bonding type. It isn't easy getting someone commitment phobic to get into a relationship. Therapy can help with it, I've been thinking of trying it for my phobias, but I can't afford a good therapist right now. I don't know how you would broach that topic, though. Do you think it is just that he is this way with everyone or just doesn't want to commit to you?

Seth Speaks notes and examples for chapter one: I do not have a physical body, yet I am writing this book: You have heard of ghost hunters, I can quite literally be called a ghost writer, though I do not approve of the term "ghost". Names are not important. I am quite independent of a physical image, and so are you. Consciousness creates form. It is not the other way around. All personalities are not physical. It is only because you are so busily concerned with daily matters that you do not realize that there is a portion of you who knows that its own powers are far superior to those shown by the ordinary self. You have each lives other existences, and that knowledge is within you though you are not consciously aware of it. You would be much better off in reading this book if you asked yourself who you are rather than asked who I am, for you cannot understand what I am unless you understand the nature of personality and the characteristics of consciousness. If you believe firmly that your consciousness is locked up somewhere inside your skull and is powerless to escape it, if you feel that your consciousness ends at the boundary of your body, then you sell yourself short, and you will think that I am a delusion. I am no more a delusion than you are, and that may be a loaded sentence. I am an energy personality essence, no longer focused in physical matter. You are not stuck in time like a fly in a closed bottle, whose wings are therefore useless. You cannot trust your physical senses to give you a true picture of reality. They are lovely liars, which such a fantastic tale to tell that you believe it without question. You are sometimes wiser, more creative, and far more knowledgeable when you are dreaming than when you are awake. What I will tell you has been told before throughout the centuries, and given again when it was forgotten. I hope to clarify many points that have been distorted through the years. And I offer my original interpretation of others, for no knowledge exists in a vacuum, and all information must be coloured by the personality who holds it and passes it on. Therefore I describe reality as I know it, and my experience in many layers and dimensions. This is not to say that other realities do not exist. I adopt from my own bank of past personalities those characteristics that seem appropriate. There are many of us, personalities like myself, unfocused in the physical matter or time. Our existence seems strange to you only because you do not realize the true potentials of personality, and you are hypnotized by your own limited concepts. You create the world that you know. You have been given perhaps the most awesome gift of all: the ability to project your thoughts outwards into physical form. The fact is that each of you create your own physical reality, and en masse, you create both the glories and the terrors that exist within your earthly experience. Until you realize that you are the creators, you will refuse to accept this responsibility. You have grown "ego-bound" instead, held in a spiritual rigidity, with the intuitive portions of the self either denied or distorted beyond any recognition. Since we have mentioned animals, let me say here that they do possess a kind of consciousness that does not allow them as many freedoms as your own. Yet at the same time, they are not hampered in its use by certain characteristics that often impede the practical potential of human consciousness. Consciousness is a way of perceiving the various dimensions of reality. Consciousness as you know it is highly specialized. The physical senses allow you to perceive the three-dimensional world, and yet by their very nature they inhibit the perception of other equally valid dimensions. Most of you identify with your daily physically oriented self. You would not think of identifying with one portion of your body and ignoring all other parts, and yet you are doing the same thing when you imagine that the egotistical self carries the burden of your identity. I am telling you that you are not a cosmic bag of bones and flesh, thrown together through some mixture of chemicals and elements. I am telling you that your consciousness is not some fiery products formed merely accidentally through the interworkings of chemical components. You form the physical body that you know at a deeply unconscious level with great discrimination, miraculous clarity and intimate unconscious knowledge of each minute cell that composes it. This is not meant symbolically. Now because of your conscious mind, as you think it, is not aware of these activities, you do not identify with this inner portion of yourselves. But this seemingly unconscious portion of yourself is far more knowledgeable, and upon its smooth functioning your entire physical existence depends. This portion is conscious, aware, alert. It is you, who do not listen to it's voice. I call this seemingly unconscious the "inner ego", for it directs inner activities. It correlates information that is perceived not through the physical senses, but through other inner channels. It is the inner perceiver of reality that exists beyond the three-dimensional. It carries with it the memory of each of your past existences. It looks into subjective dimensions that are literally infinite, and from those subjective realities all objective realities flow. This portion of your identity is quite natively clairvoyant and telepathic. The "outer ego" and the inner ego operate together, the one to enable you to manipulate in the world that you know, the other to bring you those delicate inner perceptions without physical existence could not be maintained. There is however a portion of you, the deeper identity who forms both the inner ego and the outer ego, who decided that you would be a physical being in this place and in this time. This is the core of your identity, the psychic seed from which you sprang, the multidimensional personality of which you are a part. Where I place the subconscious, imagine it as a meeting place between the outer and inner egos, there are no real divisions to the self, however, so we speak of carious portions only to make the basic idea clear. You cannot understand yourselves until you rid yourself of the notion that personality is a "here and now" attribute of consciousness. The self that you know is but one fragment of your entire identity. These fragment selves are not strung together, however like beads of a string. They are more like the various skins of an onion or segments of an orange, all connected through the one vitality and growing out into various realities while springing from the same source. I want to emphasize that as these things grow from within outward, so does each fragment of the entire self. You observe the outside aspect of objects. You physical senses permit you to perceive the exterior forms to which you then react, but your physical senses to come extend force you to perceive reality in this manner, and the inside vitality within matter and form is not so apparent. Nothing exists, neither rock, mineral, plant, animal or air, that is not filled with consciousness of its own kind. There is no such thing as dead matter. There is no object that was not formed by consciousness, and each consciousness, regardless of its degree, rejoices in sensation and creativity. You cannot understand what you are unless you understand such matters. There are no limitations to the self. There are no limitations to its potentials. You can adopt artificial limitations through your own ignorance, however. You can identify, for example, with your outer ego alone, and cut yourself off from abilities that are a part of you. The personality is multidimensional. Now at times I will be using the term "camouflage", referring to the physical world to which the outer ego relates, for physical form is one of the camouflages that reality adopts. The camouflage is real, and yet there is a much greater reality within it - the vitality that gave it form. Your physical senses then allow you to perceive this camouflage, for they are attuned to it in a highly specialized manner. But to sense the reality within the form requires a different sort of attention, and the more delicate manipulations than the physical senses provide. The ego is a jealous god, and it wants its interests served. It does not want to admit the reality of any dimensions except those within which is feels comfortable and can understand. It is not natively as rigid as it seems. Its curiosity can be of great value. If you have a limited conception of the nature of reality, then your ego will do its best to keep you in the small enclosed area of your accepted reality. If, on the other hand, your intuitions and creative instincts are allowed freedom, then they communicate some knowledge of greater dimensions to this most physically oriented portion of your personality. Personality is a gestalt of ever-changing perception. It is the part of the identity which perceives. I do not force my perceptions upon the woman through whom I speak, nor is her consciousness blotted out during our communications. Instead there is an expansion of her consciousness and a projection of energy that is directed away from three-dimensional reality. This concentration away from the physical system may make it appear as if her consciousness is blotted out. Instead, more is added to it. Now from my own field of reality I focus my attention toward the woman, but the words she speaks, these words upon the pages, are not initially verbal at all. In the first place, language as you know it is a slow affair: letter by letter strung out to make a word, and words to make a sentence, that result of linear thought pattern. Language as you know it is partially and grammatically the end product of your physical time, and your language structure is not given to the communication of intricate, simultaneous experience. I am aware of a different kind of experience, not linear, and can focus upon and react to an infinite variety of simultaneous events. This ability to perceive and to react to unlimited simultaneous events is a basic characteristic of each whole self or entity. Each reader, being presently ensconced within a physical form knows only a small portion of himself. The entity is the overall identity of which his personality is one manifestation. All knowledge or information bears the stamp of the personality who holds it or passes it on. There is within this personality a rather unique facility that makes our communications possible. I will put this as simply as possible: There is within this psyche what amounts to a transparent dimensional warp that serves almost like an open window through which other realities can be perceived, a multidimensional opening that has to some extend escaped being clouded over by the shade of physical focus. The physical senses usually blind you to these open channels, for they perceive reality only in their own image. To some extent, then, I enter your reality through a psychological warp in your space and time. In a manner of speaking, such an open channel serves much as a pathway between the author's personality and my own, so that communication is possible between. Such psychological and psychic warps between dimensions of existence are not infrequent. They are merely recognized as such infrequently, and utilized even less so.

@Terell Kirby Thanks a lot, it would certainly be cool if it happens!

Not yet, maybe in this lifetime I will, maybe not. I get what it takes, but I am afraid of ego death tbh.

@Lyubov Happens to me all the time, I need to learn to start saving posts because of this.

Sign a prenup. Also, not all women are after money if things fall through. I inherit a home from my family and have family/financial support, the last thing on my mind would be, "Something failed let's screw them over." My mind would just be on how to leave the situation with as little work as possible on my end and as little emotional volatility. As long as I don't get screwed over, usually it's me in relationships paying for shit, idk why it ends up that way; I gotta screen better. You can get certainty in other ways, too, you don't have to follow a ritual that other people have created, you can make your own. Commitment is a choice, if you make it your own, then I feel that increases the chances that the other person understands what it means more than getting married, because it was better thought out and customized for who those people are. Marriage doesn't have that. It's a paper cut-out ritual. I would want to make my own ritual that meant what marriage was for originally. I'd have to have a lot of time to think about what it meant to me. Certainty is nice, though. It would have to be a psychedelic's ritual then; chipping away slowly at differences, inconsistencies and things like that. Gaining more ideas during the trip and adding to it each year, like a holiday or something. That would be actually fun instead of standing in front of a bunch of people and making it a spectacle.

I don't know, it used to get to me, it gets to me less and less the more I focus on my own shit. Maybe you're just not focused enough on things you wanna do that feel better than worrying about a toxic forum? That's just my opinion, I thought about it, quite a lot. And went full circle on how I feel about this place. The more I focus on my own life and less on how I want things to be, the less anything seems to matter, and by proxy the less toxic it seems to be. The point is: It can be. And if you are a person where atmosphere affects you strongly, then distance yourself from it.

Not my cup of tea, it doesn't reflect what it should nowadays; wanna be free; could end up a total disaster.

Such an amazing music video ^

^ The process Echoes start as a cross in you Trembling noises that come to soon Spatial movement which seems to you Resonating your mask or feud Hollow talking and hollow girl Force it up from the root of pain Never said it was good, never said it was near Shadow rises and you are here And then you cut You cut it out And everything Goes back to the beginning Silence seizes a cluttered room Light is shed not a breath too soon Darkness rises in all you do Standing and drawn across the room Spatial movements are butterflies Shadows scatter without a fire There's never been bad, there has always been truth Muted whisper of the things she'll move And then you cut You cut it out And everything Goes back to the beginning Never said it was good, never said it was new Muted whisper of the things you feel

Home ^

Algorithm's choice.

Weed/caffeine/internet addiction; hard time sticking to a spiritual practice. Listen to too much music, also.

This entire channel, not well known, is all about learning self love, on the physical, mental and spiritual levels - as being the most important part of spiritual practice. I've posted some of her stuff below - she is about green/yellow and her videos are very informative for someone who needs help in this area. Check out her channel if you have the time, she's quite "real", which is refreshing. Good luck! Notes: Why self-love and nourishing who you are today (learning how to show up for yourself, internal self love) is the foundation for everything: You must learn how to become your own safe place. Everything is built on top of self-love and it will be very hard to fix yourself and change your habits if you do not love yourself - but with this tool everything else will naturally come. We don't need to force ourselves to become something and it does not work. Go slow on this path, this is the fastest route. Embrace it. Your subconscious has been programmed for a certain action and it can unlearn it and learn a new skill. There is a reason for why we do what we do and none of it is that we are bad or wrong or stupid, incapable or self sabotaging or self hating - every reason comes down to this is what we learned in childhood, and if we want something different then figuring out what we need to do instead and get the body and brain on board with the new thing is difficult. If you just do this one thing - making yourself your own safe place, everything you are capable of; progress comes from this. Without doing this, your nervous system will not let you do the other things. Results will not be quick. It will be the same thing over and over again. Deal with your guilt and shame before working on other skills because if you try to fix yourself without this foundation then the other tools will not work. If we don't understand where the lack of self love came from and if we have confusion on what is good for us, where if we do things in the moment that feel good that have bad outcomes, if we do not understand why this is happening then none of this will make sense and will look somewhere else thinking that it is just a bad part of you. Everyone thinks they are an exception to the rule and the horrible thing inside of them must be fixed because of the negative outcomes, however this is not the case. There is no quick solution and you are not the exception. This applies to everyone because although we are all different, we are not all that different. So listen up! In our childhoods we are in a temporary reality, a codependent reality where we are not capable of understanding or meeting our needs and are completely dependent on our caregivers to meet them for us. That which is supporting our growth leads to pleasure. That which does not support our growth causes pain - all living things share this in common, we want to grow and humans are very complex and so is life - it wants to express its potential and live. In order to live, we must be continually growing. In order to be continually growing, we have to be taking in new information; feedback loops, cause and effect. We are all evolving here on Earth. This is the fundamental element of pain and pleasure. When we are children we are being programmed about how reality works. Children have a good connection to their instincts - pain and pleasure - because they have not been programmed yet, so their connection is stronger, but they are not more knowledgeable. Caregivers are meant to teach their children how reality works, and to show us how to meet, to understand our needs. We only have control over our expression of pain and pleasure in this lifetime. Our caregiver's approval means survival for us so from day one we are programmed not to pay attention to what our bodies are saying to us - when caregivers "go away", I don't get my needs met. Needs get met from someone understanding me and meeting my needs. When I am rejected I am at risk. That is our first program. Approval. What should happen in a healthy environment, we start to develop autonomy, we are given tools by our caregivers for understanding when we are in pain that a need is not being met, and to identify why there is pain and to be able to change it - pain and pleasure experienced in a neutral way. When we experience true pleasure there is no negative backlash, this is the different between real and fake pleasure. What actually happens is because humanity doesn't understand itself or how reality works - struggling to survive - and creating systems based on misunderstanding on how to survive, this complex web has created a consensus reality, which is "this is how you have to be, what you have to do, good, bad, ect. and through our growth process we begin to experience something called guilt, shame, abandonment and rejection. So as we are expressing ourselves, as we are growing and going through the learning process, we did things where we expressed and were told we were bad. Or we were in pain and were abandoned or rescued and did not learn why we got hurt. This triggers the nervous system, "I am not going to get my needs met, I am rejected, so what do I need to do to to get back in their good graces?" So now we don't know what the original pain was in the first place. "Who do I need to be, what do I need to do to alter my behaviour so that I am approved of again?" So now we are two layers removed from real reality. An appropriate response, "I still love you, you are still loved and safe, how does it feel to have hit the other child for the toy?" Children would tell you that it does not feel good and would learn that hitting and taking the toy is a negative action. "You hit because that was your instinct." Then you can teach them to share once they learn the source of the bad feeling, if it is not covered up by shame, fear, guilt, ect - their nervous systems can learn to enjoy sharing. This is real learning, the child then becomes more complex through that interaction. Most interactions do not go this way - this takes away the empathy because all they feel is fear from the situation and freeze. What looks like self sabotage in adulthood is actually your body doing what it learned in childhood over and over again, now as an adult. Most of us as adults do not learn to be autonomous and to meet our own needs, with or without acceptance or approval of others. We take the codependent approach and think others hold the keys to what we need. So rather than becoming an adult and communicating and understanding our needs we become codependent with everyone around us, and when we are in pain because we learned in our childhoods that pain is wrong and bad, we connect to consensus reality, which is made up of stories and fantasies. "We are wrong or reality is wrong." That is how we learn to interact with pain. The shame and guilt always comes from "I am in pain because I am bad and did something wrong." Why do we do that? Because in childhood we only have control over our behaviour and nothing else, so if something goes wrong we assume it is our behaviour that caused it. So we all collectively move and act from the false assumption that pain makes us bad and wrong and so we project it onto ourselves or others. Self help, spirituality and self-improvement come into play with this because they are riding on the idea that the pain is your fault. Something broken and wrong about you because you are in pain - it all plays on your insecurities. We want to believe it is true because it makes it simple. "If I just do this, just fix this, then everything will be better." There is no questioning of the system. "You are deficient and here is the fix." And that feels good because it is familiar conditioning. Adaptation. This creates a learning trauma. Real reality is: it's either supporting your growth or it is not, and some of the things we are doing to cope are because we exist in a system that doesn't work for people, the rat race does not align with who most people really are. We are disconnected from our true selves. Being. Instincts. Pain and pleasure. We don't have the tools to learn what we need to learn from the instincts we are born with. We were trained to disconnect from the instinct to fit in, so people will meet your needs, so you feel safer. It becomes a loop of trying to fit in. The internet creates echo chambers where people who only interact with those who have ideas like theirs because we are so afraid, we don't want new information, we don't want to believe that the way we are seeing things is wrong because if we are wrong then we are bad and this is shameful and we don't know how to learn from that because we then have to learn to change and our bodies don't want that so we join echo chambers, and the world just keeps getting more divided because we are all stuck in nervous system trauma. The more we operate from, "How do I show up for myself right now?" and "What do I need to feel safe?" and "Why am I doing what I am doing?" and assume innocence and a good reason and it is not always my fault. Most of humanity is taught the wrong way. Pain = shame. Half the people = I am bad. Codependent. Half the people = you are bad/at fault. Pain really means something is out of alignment and what do I need to do to get into alignment. This is a long process to learn what these things mean to you. Reprogramming base nervous system programming from childhood takes a lot of time and it is hard to do, and is the foundation on which you have built ALL your other behaviours. Everything that you resist comes from not questioning your reality. If you were to accept yourself as who you are right now as loveable and good enough, that is what takes your nervous system out of fear and then you can start the process of learning from your experience. When we don't have this foundation, all the tools do nothing because we are triggered into a state of fear that forces us to do the same thing over and over and over again. This is why becoming your own "safe space" is so essential. It is not one and done. It is a continual practice of learning to show up for yourself when in pain, pleasure and be in the moment and as, "What do I need right now?" Start with self compassion. This gets rid of fight or flight, and then we can learn but it takes time to learn to stop abandoning yourself when you are in pain, so be patient. Investigate. See that you don't die. Be there for yourself. Do it again and again. Investigate, investigate, investigate. Assume innocence within yourself. If a program is stimulating your nervous system and disconnecting you from yourself, it is not for you - esp. if it is based on "There is something wrong with you." "What did you learn?" "Why am I in pain?" "Take as much responsibility for myself as I can." Self help can keep you stuck in a state of self-obsession, so try and use your time to contribute towards better things. You feel safe when you feel loved, so love yourself. It is a lot of work. But it all comes down to showing up for yourself with compassion and curiosity and assuming innocence. This is all you need.

It's also really amazing, without the slug's sacrifice, none of this could be, everything is the way it is for a great plan that we are a part of.

I don't really watch him and have not in years - once people start talking about antivax or fake moon landings or flat earth and things like that - I sort of tune them out and don't watch again.

@Tyler Durden Yeah, it looks like clay. Reality looks hyper-real, too. You dis-identify with what you expect the shapes to be and to mean altogether and it creates this effect. I've seen beings before as well.