Miguel1

Thank you! The last part was quite pessimistic, I admit it. Sorry. And thank you for calling it out. It’s just after approaching 50k+ people and not seeing much depth and many beautiful souls at all, it’s hard to believe I will bump into them. But you are right! Trying to find conscious souls in unconscious clubs and nightlife is bound to fail. It’s time to be live more aligned, so I can also let aligned people in, when I eventually bump into them.

Thank you brother. It’s a beautiful experience to practice True Authenticity and Alignment. Here are couple songs for you. I will record some dance for you guys sometimes. Grief the past and let go: https://on.soundcloud.com/55BY3z7Wjy2wSWEer5 Welcoming the new: https://on.soundcloud.com/tbpPTPO96cfLIsao17 What a beautiful build up to a majestic drop. - - - - - Honestly I’ve wanted to live this life for so long. It brings tears to my eyes. Faking myself to the world not only fucks me inside, but also doesn’t bear the fruit I want, which is to find beautiful souls. So might as well live Authentically, at least. Even if it doesn’t attract beautiful people.

Thank you! I want to do and inspire something completely new in the world. I know dance therapy has existed since the beginning of time. But I want to somehow take it up to a level / place, it has never been in before. Here in Finland especially, it’s not a known phenomenon at all. Also, we are a very shy and reserved people. Dancing and being authentic in public like this is not something done before. I would like to bring something transformative here, and to the world. I have danced for 20 years. I have a completely dance unique style to myself. I have a deep history of 20 years in self-development, spirituality, healing and inner work. I have also exhausted socializing and pickup to the point I have mastered them, and want to let them go. I do want to transfer the skills I learned from it to my next journey tho: Courage, Confidence, Bravery, Not caring about what others think, Strenght, Leadership. It’s time for something completely new.

This place will be my first step to my new journey to being more aligned and in touch with who I really am, and my highest values. I feel quite ready to lose almost everything, just so I can be more genuine and authentic. And to possibly find people that I really align with. I am so sick of living in inauthentic life. It goes directly against my highest values. And it is not sustainable, so what even is the point? Of course I am aware that as a wage slave, I can’t completely be free to do just whatever.

Genes play the biggest part. Most people do not have a single care about the work that we do here, yet many of us here, view this work as more important than anything else in life, by far. Why do some people care so much about pure understanding and truth, but most people do not? As for whether I have reflected in solitude on my extroversion or not, I have done multiple solitude retreats in my life. I’ve done a couple 3 month retreats. It is very clear to me that I am way more in my natural element being around people. Solitude is very beautiful too, and I want to practice it more. Just not right now.

@integral I’m definitely ENFJ based on this. Ti, Fe, Ni, Se My natural main function in any given social situation is to make sure everyone is good and the group has harmony.

Yep, it works with extroversion too. Are you actually an extrovert, or are you just scared of being alone, and with yourself?

I remember you typed INFJ. What did you type after that? I also remember saying you remind me of an ENFJ, like a true chameleon

@Natasha Tori Maru Your personality type changes every 6 months

@bazera Yes! I got some great advice here on ways to shift my extroversion from directly talking to people in the form of socializing, to for example, public speaking or expressing myself outwards. As for going all the way to solitude, I completely agree that it is way easier to go all in (or even the only option), rather than half-half. But I am not ready to go all in. As for practical application, I truly just need to build my life and lifestyle around something that is way more aligned and authentic. Socializing with random ”normies” is fun for a bit but gets unaligned and fake really fast, if I do it too much.

@bazera Yes, Finland joined Nato recently after Russia attacked Ukraine. That being said, Trump on the other side, Putin on the other side.. Not the most secure place to be in. But life goes on. - - - - - It seems like you are in a good place. As for you dating the spiritual girl, traumas are a huge pain to deal with in a relationship. Also, if you are not growing together, then the relatiobship becomes stagnant, and boring. To me, dating a normie / non-spiritual girl is very uninteresting because I have no idea how I would spend most of my time with them, outside of sex. I find exploring our minds and thoughts together to be extremely fulfilling and romantic with my intimate partner. - - - - - As for spiritual work and me working on changing my psyche, I have tried to be happy alone ever since I got into spirituality. It works for a while but I find out afterwards that it’s mostly just repression. I do think that more spiritual work (or rather, authenticity and radical honesty work) would be good for me. I think I need to just reflect and change my lifestyle on a core level: Way less social games, way more authenticity in the way I relate to others and in my work. I think I want to push my dancing in the form of pure expression and healing, way more out to the public, and possibly turn it into a career. For example, if I go to the city / streets / parks to dance, to exprees, and to heal and to inspire others to heal — and as an audience gathers around me, I could give me some talks to about authenticity, empathy, and healing etc. I think this wouod be really beautiful and would be a way more aligned lifestyle to my heart, than how I am currently living. This way I am also way more likely to find my tribe of people too, instead of going clubbing. It’s so obvious when I say it out loud like this. Thank you for your support, means alot to me. Thank you so much.

@bazera I’ll answer you a bit later in the day. But I wanted to just express to everyone, who contributed constructively, whether via criticism or support, that I am deeply grateful. I am quite lonely in my life, despite having lots of people around me. I am able to start a conversation wherever I go, make friends right there and then, get invited to parties, attract girls, go on dates, Yet I am deep down very lonely. And I often at the end of my day, feel into the pain deeper, and cry. As ENFJ, our mind works in such a way that in the day, we are in our extraverted feeling (dominant function), very social, very outgoing.. then in the night, we relax into our intraverted intuition, where we become reflective, philosophical, and question things. The more we mature, the more this intraverted intuition comes online. During the times of my intraverted intuition, it often hits me that despite having so many people around me, nobody knows me more than 5-10% of who I really am. And if I showed a little bit more of myself, I would very fast lose everyone. The contrast of having so many people like me, so many people around me, yet being so alone in it, being so shallow and fake with them, pains me so deeply. What makes it way worse is that, I am a natural extrovert and crave socializing, human contact and intimacy very very much. Real genuine intimacy. Most of you here are introverts, so you can’t really know how this feels. I have struggled with this for my whole adult life. The only thing is that it gets worse every year, as I keep growing exponentially, and so does the gap between me and other people. This is the only place I can be myself the most, by far. Oftentimes 100% myself. But you are just words in a screen. It is not the same at all. I wish I could make many of you my real life friends. I know that would give me so much happiness. I wish I could shower you with real love. And provide safety and containment for you to be fully yourselves, and we could explore real genuine friendship, spirituality, healing, and pure understanding together. I have so much love to give. True, deep love. Yet I have no one to give love to, because most people are stuck in their egos and true love would be an ego death for them. I am burdened with so much love gathered inside me, it turns heavy. Thank you guys for being in this community. And thank you Leo for hosting this for us.

Interesting / good question. My high school friend. We were friends for like 10-15 years. It worked out because we both got into spirituality together. It went downhill fast once I started doing Leo’s work seriously 5 years ago. Then I started noticing too many lies, biases, bullshits, self-deceptions. All of which I had kinda noticed but had repressed / ignored. After Leo’s work, it became too obvious. So I ourgrew him and no longer had much mutual stuff / passions to stay in touch with. We chat once in a while for few sentences on whatsapp. I don’t know about why most don’t last, but for me they don’t last because 1. Not enough mutual interests and passions 2. Our developmental level are just too different. Even now in my social circle (with complete normies) that I have been building for the past few months, it’s falling apart because I simply just don’t care about social games and what people think of me, nearly as much as them, and this gets me to behave in such a way that hurts them. I rather lose them, than start micromanaging every social move I make, because it’s quite fragile, the whole game. If people were more conscious, were able to laugh at themselves, and didn’t take things too seriously, having a social circle wouldn’t necessarily be too bad. - - - - - What about you?

I appreciate Dr. Ana’s work.

Born and raised here. I love this country with my heart. I don’t think I’ll ever find another place I feel at home at nearly as much as I feel here. Especially when this is my view: https://www.instagram.com/s/aGlnaGxpZ2h0OjE4MDU2NTIzMDk4NzU0MjA3?story_media_id=3912508033867072451&igsh=MTBpOXk4a3VzNGJrbQ== One of the only big downsides is that Russia is our neighbour, and you never know what they decide to do.

There is one spiritual festival here in Finland. It’s relatively popular. It’s literally just conformity. You can’t talk with them about anything authentic, cuz they are all high on their conformity bliss. The more we niche down into serious spiritual events and retreats, the creepier it gets to go there to approach people romantically. And finally, in these more serious spaces, there is virtually no one I find attractive.

@zurew It is as obvious as day, that an average 25 year old isn’t nearly as capable of being as unbiased, as objective, as selfless, as truthful and honest, as mature in their behaviour, as empathetic, as capable of thinking big picture, systems, nature of reality as me. It is obvious that an average 25 year old is way more stuck in ego survival than I am. It is straight up disrespectful to state otherwise. I have been doing this work for 15 years, as one my top priorities. A normie cannot compare. Don’t take this work for granted. Actually go out and talk to people, you will notice that most people are simply unconscious survival zombies. It will make you realize how alone you are in this world.

You look like the secret lover who ruined my marriage from the past life

Wow, thank you.

@zurew I have not said I am tier 2. There are other ways to measure development, than just Spiral Dynamics. But certainly I have some tier 2 traits in me.

Thank you so much. The truth is, it is painful to keep building a relationship with a girl, taking a real liking to her, then having to drop her due to incompatibility. And grieving it. Over and over again. This is so painful. If I didn’t have the right music and my dancing to process and release the grieving, I would not be able to keep going. I would become cold and closed off.

To deny that my psychological and spiritual development is miles ahead of an average 25 year old girl in the mainstream space, would be untruthful. Why would we be interested in that?

All I did was, I had a low moment, was vulnerable, and expressed here, hoping to have some support and mutual thoughts. Instead, I got labelled a bunch of times as egotistical, superior, and now victimhood. But a few people showed me real support. The people who actually goes out, has done the work and the approaches, and actually knows how empty it can become to meet so many people, yet connecting with none; just pushing their unconscious buttons to get reactions out of them.

@zurew When you approach 50 000 people, and still don’t find your people, perhaps you’ll know what I mean then.

@integral I agree with you that one of the main functions of a relationship is to grow together. I notice that I get bored the moment I am no longer challenged in the relationship. The issue is then you will make your partner feel extremely unloved, when you push them to grow. This is not sustainable and I learned it the hard way. The real solution is to find a partner who has a natural desire to grow, and to explore the topics and to do the work we do here. But this is extremely rare, if you also need them to be youthful and fairly physically attractive. I am still quite young and very youthful, so I find it hard to be attracted to older people, where it would be easier to find what I am looking for. One of the downsides of this work is you outgrow everyone around you, by miles. And no, this is not being egotistical. It is being truthful, if you actually do this work seriously.