Miguel1

If you have trauma(s), work with a therapist On top of that, work seriously and passionately towards a life you love. For example, your life purpose, finances, health, hobbies, passions, art, socializing etc. And finally, everything Leo teaches which is the whole domain of metaphysics and spirituality.

And this is an unconscious behaviour in the sense that you are intentionally playing the mysterious archetype in order to manipualte her fantasies to go wild.

@Valach Leo has made great episodes on this. But as a practical pointer, truly it comes down to finding your true values and living in alignment with them. If pursuing sex is not your top value, stop doing it.

@Natasha Tori Maru I see, you make a good point in how some people type INFJ not because they truly are but because of other reasons, especially trauma. I can see how they are linked. And I can see her being an healthy INFJ too. Can @Emerald confirm? 😊

@Natasha Tori Maru I see! Yeah I have a couple fairly close INFJ friends and they are in many ways complete opposite to me, it’s mind buggling. But these people did have a tough childhood that they haven’t processed. I am yet to bump into a healthy INFJ.

I am almost certain you have mentioned that you type as INFJ, the introvert version of me

@Emerald Unconscious behaviour attracts unconscious people. Conscious behaviour works as a mirror and no person wants to see how much of a devil they are. Having integrous and truthful conversations with women is the surest way to lose them. The more you feed them fantasies, the better. Trust me, you aint gettig laid a lot if you behave very consciously and mature, even if you are physically attractive. I am speaking from a ton of personal experience. Also, there’s a lot of good looking extroverts teaching dating out there. I find that more common (and more of a true issue), unless you are talking about behavioural attractiveness in which case toxic unconscious behaviour is a turn off for a conscious woman like you but a big turn on for majority of women. That’s the black pill reality of dating. I get almost proportionally better results with women, the more unconscious I behave. It is sickening, and heart breaking. And probably not something I am willing to put up with for long anymore.

Brother, stop conforming to nonsense, and use critical thinking for yourself. I am the same age as you, and I stopped casual hook ups long time ago. Nothing turns me off more than shallow BS. Learn to love yourself, and the ability to properly masturbate. Masturbation done right satisfies you so much than random hook up with an unconscious being.

This will be wild. Excited

@Leo Gura Pick up brainwashing

@WonderSeeker Yup. I am definitely very picky with whom I decide to even go on a date with. I will screen quite hard for their ability for more maturity. Edit: btw: have you heard of demi sexuality? I have been considering whether I have developed it in recent years.

@Zenterus Oh, my bad! It’s good to have others who are in the same stage of the journey with the whole sex game. Can get very lonely with all the unconsciousness around it, and as you said, the pick up programming.

@Emerald Thank you for the insights, they are a great reminder for myself to keep grounded and in integrity, now that I’m entering the dating market again after many years.

Since you only have 7 post, I’m gonna assume you are fairly new here and havent bumped into this post: I was reminded of this, so I thought I would share it for you. You are not alone in feeling like this. At least me and OJ shared our experience with this on the thread. Check it out brother.

Man, this is like hell in every possible way lol I wouldn’t even be able to get an erection if sex became this mechanical and robotic.

Go straight to studying Josh Lyons’ Actualized Selling. The most honest, authentic yet effective stage orange way you can possibly sell.

Bro is old-school

I have completely given up on finding a girl my age group, that is into spirituality in the purest sense, and not new-age BS. I will be happy to have a solid stage green girlfriend with relatively good integrity. So in that sense, instead of looking for a girl into spirituality, I am more looking for a girl who is more honest, truthful and integrous. Spirituality is basically Truth anyways.

Yup, I am similar in the sense that I am attracted to the same age group. That means women around the age 24-30, but in practice more like 24-28. How many of these are conscious and mature enough for a healthy relationship based on truth! But you make a good point about the upside of my extrovertness, I didn’t even think about it! I guess it is a double edged sword, as many things in life are. On one hand, it makes meeting new people, in volume, much easier. But on the other hand, it means I crave connection and socialization much more than an introvert.

I have been having a crisis from this for a long time, and still haven’t moved on from it. Especially as a young man who isn’t attracted to the older women yet, finding a young mature and conscious woman is virtually impossible. It’s just that I happen to be an extrovert who values deep intimate companionship.

@Leo Gura Wow, this is very well articulated. This is what I am trying to put into words for myself when I date now vs 5 years ago when I was much more corrupt.

Thanks for sharing. Good self-awareness! For me, it must be dating as I recentl started going out to meet people and date again. And good riddance! It’s an unconscious and conformity-filled cesspool! It is almost perfectly correlated that the more conscious and mature you behave, the less results you get. And vice versa. My God, I have matured too much in the past 5 years to be playing this game for long.

I almost choked on my food

https://www.vogue.com/article/is-having-a-boyfriend-embarrassing-now Articles like this fueling the girls’ side of things.

Great points here already, and definitely great question too. Basically how I see it is that girls getting more power through the empowerement movements taking over, making them more entitled and picky. While at the same time guys getting disempowered by the same movements, society and culture, and thus being way more afraid of being a proper masculine, attractive man. Being more afraid of actually learning social skills with the girls and the art of approaching and seduction. Finally, add in the fact that more girls enter universities than guys, they enter the work force more, make more money etc. and the whole old school traditional protect & provide don’t really work anymore. What this means tho, is that the girls now go more for the really top attractive guys (who dont want to commit, cuz they dont have to and are driven by having lots of sex with different women), and are more willing to be in their harem, especially as slut shaming also is getting much less than in the past. So for the top guys, it is just getting easier. So girls get their needs met by the attractive people they really wanna have sex with, but can provide for themselves better than most guys. And the top guys get their needs met without having to commit to just one girl. This is the case for the majority of girls, and the top guys. The rest struggles to even enter the game - hence the whole male loneliness pandemic. Oh, and of course social media and endless options just throws gasoline on fire. Personally, I find this lifestyle extremely shallow and unsatisfying. I prefer an intimate relationship, but my standards are perhaps too high. Or just really hard to find someone compatible with me. Compatibility is key in making relationships work.