Miguel1

Ideally this is done with your presence, eye contact, tone of voice and body language. Playing these word games can get yourself too heavily in your head.

Don’t you think you are basing such strong statement simply in blief? You have no real proof that it actually is inevitable for most people. In theory it does make sense. For example, if I keep on focusing on building my conscious business and art, I am WAY more likely to find what I am looking for, than in the general socializing spaces of the mainstream culture.

I think this is too reductionist. Plenty of being wait their whole lives, and nothing happens. On the other hand, my natural extrovertness makes it very hard for me to just be passive and wait patiently.

Can you make this simpler to understand? What are you trying to say?

There are plenty of mature and older women out there that I meet and want to pursue dating with me. I can’t find them attractive, no matter how much I try (not assuming your wife is older).

Yes of course. This is just not supposed to be a fix-it-all thread. Just a place to be a bit more vulnerable and open, than usual.

For me, dating is extremely hard because I am used to the best looking girls. And for the past 5 years that I was in a relationship (and did hardcore actualized work), I grew my emotional and psychological age like 10-20 years at least. Now that I am single, you could say that my emotional and psychological age is of an 40-50 years old’s. Yet, I don’t get attracted to older people, nor younger ones that are not that physically attractive (I am used to the best). So, not only my emtional age is way higher than the girls’ I am attracted to, but also the girls that I am attracted most likely haven’t had to develop themselves psychologically too much (due to being spoiled). Despite all this, my brain is wired for deep intimacy and human connections. And like Natasha said the other day (paraphasing): she needs someone with whom she can have meaningful conversations with. For me to have a proper connection and intimacy with a girl, I need to be attracted to her physically, but also intellectually (to a certain degree). So as a 31 years old, I am looking to find someone who is 24-28 (ideally 24-26), is emotionally relatively mature, doesn’t have much baggage and traumas at all, has secure attachment style, is overall a good human being with a good heart, is capable of relaxing into her feminine with me, and also is wise and intelligent enough to have some meaningful conversations with me here and there — and oh yeah, is also physically quite attractive. If I find a girl who has all these qualities and is ”8/10” attractive, it would be a dream. But it feels like trying to find a unicorn. What makes it harder is how do you attract such a girl? Do you apply your best game to her? Or do you lower your game as much as possible to screen for this girl, because a girl like this would appreciate mature, conscious behaviour, right? At this point in my spiritual and psychological development, applying hard game is exhausting as hell because it is purely dishonesty. My brain chemistry is so wired for honesty and being truthful that going against it feels like pushing a huge rock forward. - - - - - Sorry this turned out to be my release thread. But please, this is not just about me. Feel free to share how is it going with you all? Are you aligned in life? Get in touch with your heart and me know.

Human games. You have been on this forum for over 5 years, you should know. There is a reason, attracting girls is called ”game”. Because you are playing mind games, rather than being truthful and honest. There is a reason why the wisest and most conscious sages are alone. They are not interested in playing human games.

And assumptions ”You seem like you are a squirrel”

@LordFall The problem is that life is too hard to maintain frame all the time. If you date a superficial girl, you cannot offer her perfect life and perfect frame 24/7. A mature girl understands this, and she will appreciate the human in you. Immature ones will only like you for your surface.

Well said. I am happy to see the maturity you express. Dating a woman that is stuck in hypergamy is exhausting and a short-term game. What happens when a ”higher value” than you comes along? And there will be plenty of them. Wasted energy and time.

Hahaha what in the world am I reading. You talk like it’s your first week on actualized.org.

This. Turning girls in finance/crypto spaces into serious consciousness work? We can do better than that with our understanding of human mind.

As Jith pointed out, I am talking purely looks, not personality. I couldn’t even appreciate real beauty by girls, before I matured, and got more abundant with girls.

They are more rare than unicorns. But my God if I had a genius conscious hottie as my girlfriend, escape to live in the middle of nowhere, raise a family and practice spirituality together. Tantra at night. Now this is happiness.

MY GOD, someone fucking said it! Whenever I bring up the topic of me needing my partner to be able to discuss some depth, guys here be like: aS lOnG As sHe iS femIninE, WhT doEs iT mAtTer!!!!!

That’s quite the plot

My requirements for beauty and hotness changed all the time. As I got more and more results with girls in my youth, I constantly remember realizing ”that one girl 6 months ago wasn’t hot at all, what was I thinking”. Also, simply maturity has changed my taste for looks. The more I mature, the more I like natural beauty, elegant, and classy. But I also like artsy and different looking girls, as long as it’s done with taste, and not gone overboard. So yes, my taste definitely has changed a lot throughout the years.

This is a much better place to discuss them more in-depth than the comment section on the platform, naturally. But let us not forget to comment and like the posts so that the algorithm pushes his posts. And for the sake of your own algorithm. I suggest we start the discussions here by first naming the Reel (Leo titles them in the thumbnails in a very cute way), and perhaps even link it, cuz it seems like there will be plenty!

@UnbornTao Alright brother. I’m gonna move on. Cheers Hope ya’ll have kept the quality of the forum going on. Be civil! I won’t be able to be too active the upcoming weeks. Will just mostly read the blog.

I am not sure if Tarion is talking about intelligence here when he talks about smart (haven’t watched the video), but try becoming so intelligent that despite being charismatic as hell and having lots of people in your life, yet feeling more lonely than you have ever felt in your life, because people feel like alien species to you that don’t even speak the same language. Try develoing such emotional and empathetic intelligence that you feel the pain that other people’s unconsciousness creates for themselves.

@UnbornTao Where do you want to lead me to? I am lost.

You are a fool if you don’t see the immense, priceless value of the work here. I haven’t been following what you guys have discussed about cult, as I have been busy with life. So I am out of context, but your comment sounded like it’s shit thrown at Leo’s work.

I’m in tears. The amount of pain I have had to go through since doing Leo’s work seriously (from 2020 onwards), and from facing so much of my own self-deceptions, lies, devilry, manipulation, selfishness. Facing how much pain and hurt I’ve caused in others. In people I loved and held dear. It’s been absolutely devastating. I don’t know if there is a word to describe the pain. And it is still going on. I don’t know if it ever even stops. Every year the quality of the pain deepens. Not only that. My mind is wired to be a people person. I can see how people will get themselves in so much pain because of their unconsciousness and lack of this work. I can meet a girl romantically, be safe for her to be vulnerable to the point she open up to me — and me being vulnerable to her — her crying in my arms.. then leaves me for an unsafe, exciting fuckboy. I can see (and feel) how much pain that will cause her. How badly she will be used and dumped, how worthless she will feel, and how badly she will be hurt. All that makes me feel extremely sad for her. And she is just one of many. And finally, the loneliness this work creates is.. agonizing. Deep.. existencial, pain. I want great people around me. I am the total opposite of an introvert.. Nonetheless, all this deep pain is worth it. It is what is True. It is what will eventually take humanity to a better place. Thank you Leo for the work you do. Without it, I would still be a full-blown spiritual devil. I would probably just have doubled and tripled down on it throughout the years.

I was 17 when I did my first serious mediation retreat. I remember being physically in school but always just meditating. Going home, meditating. Meditating while taking a shit. Meditating to fall asleep. 3 months. I don’t think I’ve ever been anywhere near as happy (blissful) as I was during that time. Eventually my youthful desires and urges took over as I had repressed them for too long, and then went on to conquer those. Ever since then, I’ve had a few of those phases like for example, during covid (it was half-forced tho). I am looking forward for the next phase of that. Perhaps this time I will be able to push it to 6-12 months.