Miguel1

You need to date a normie and talk about all sorts of random crap you have no care about, yet have to act like you care. Then you’ll realize what you had

Noooooo don’t go pick up girls in retreats and spiritual workshops. I literally can’t fall in love with a normie. It’s so dry! And I would have to be constantly on my toes so as to not say, imply or express something too radical. A normie wouldnt feel very loved in a relationship with me, simply because I am not so enthuastic about most things they are.

What exactly are you curious about?

I don’t think I am finding one like that in a realllly long time tbh There are a ton of ”spiritual people” out there. Most of these people if you actually dive deep with them, you would notice they are not that spiritual. Their spirituality is to enhance their survival. For the longest time, this was me as well. Now, I have to say that I am by no means anywhere near perfect myself. But at least I am quite aware of it, and try my best to do something about it. As far as dance communities / circles, most of them are confirmity, run by commercial agendas. The reason my dancing is very different to most dancing, and there really is no other like me, is because I hated conformity from the very beginning and went on my own. Similarly to how Peter Ralston did with martial arts. So to answer you, the dance circles I am in, are mostly stage orange, and I am in there as part of my social circle that I have built. There definitely is no one potential to date seriously in my dance circle. Trust me, I wouldn’t feel so hopeless it I had not exhausted most, if not all options. Literally the only one option I have left is to build a whole conscious community (which I would do for its own sake), just to meet potential people. The issue with that is that as a leader of a community, it can get very unhealthy really fast if you start dating your members / followers.

Exactly! And communicating this here vulnerably, I got accused of too many bad things I lost count Now she definitely doesn’t need to be a ”9” or a ”10”. I think I would be fully satisfied with an ”8”. The youth is the bigger problem, I would prefer her to be on the younger side as I am fairly young still, and when she loses her looks after I already love her deeply, then it won’t matter. She also doesn’t need to be hardcore intellectual or philosopher by any means. But openminded to explore metaphysics, consciousness, Truth, the nature of reality, Love — wow this would be sexy. Our life purposes doesn’t definitely need to match, but it would be lovely if it’s fairly similar, as then we could discuss it too. Is it even possible to have this kind of an intimate relationship? Or would it lack polarity too much? Why would 2 integrated beings need polarities so much? I guess the main things I am looking for is divine levels of Integrity, Empathy and Love.

I did that with my ex girlfriend, ended up wasting years of my life. She became interested in it, for me, but when it was actually time to put things into action, there was a ton of resistance. And of course, sunk cost fallacy from both ends. So it just turned toxic. I learned so many painful lessons. This is an area where we need to be very careful because a girl will do a lot of things for you, when she likes you, and loves you. Doesn’t mean she actually values them. Also, having a teacher-student relationship in a romantic relationship is not healthy, due to the imbalance in power. Finally, this work takes years and decades. You don’t just take someone under your wings, hoping they will grow to your level in any decent time, that it would be worth it.

Brother. I am burned out from looking for her, that’s why this thread.

It’s not sexy nerd. There are plenty, yes. It’s sexy witch that is the issue.

Watch this at 1.5x speed guys. It came out at the right time. But imagine the gap to be way bigger as we are talking about real spiritual connection.

Your text is not the easiest to read. So what I struggle with is that I am wired for human intimacy. But I am also wired for depth and truth. And the underline issue is that I can’t find a person I am both sexually attracted to, but also emotionally, psychologically, spiritually — because I also crave depth in intimacy. What makes it trickier is that I am fairly young, and I am used to dating really youthful and beautiful girls. These girls are not the most deep people internally, because they never had to work on themselves. I’m sure I would find more mature and conscious people in the opposite part of the spectrum. Hope this cleared out your confusion.

Via social circle you get the 9s and 10s the easiest, but you can only really date one of them at a time. Also, building and maintaining a social circle takes enormous amount of time and energy. To get an 8, cold approaching is way more efficient. There are plenty of 8s out there. If your skills are really good, even the 9s and 10s are pullable with cold approaching. With social circle, it’s easier but takes way more time. I don’t have a definitive answer for you. Both has pros and cons. I would do both at the same time, since they work in harmony. And tbh, I’ve been doing that the past few months but it’s coming crashing down as I am quite burned out from the social games and fakery.

Got it. Feel free to explore my mind and situation further. We can also hop on a call if you want. I think we chatted once a few years ago!

We are all different, eh? And yes, after 50k approaches, I acknowledge I am looking for something super rare. Hence the internal struggle. But they do exist. Imagine a young Teal Swan. Now, you won’t find them in clubs. That’s for sure

Leo’s ”the enemy of great is good” IG post: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DaPW1-POJxH/?igsh=ZGd5czgyZjlpbzlp This is what I ultimately need to accept in my situation. Socializing with normies and getting results with them is good, but it holds me back badly from what is actually Great.

This is too black and white. There are plenty of intelligent women out there. And again, I don’t expect a hardcore philosopher and an intellect. I am not necessarily one myself. Also, my own brain is wired differently. I am wired for depth. Having a ”shallow” minded relationship is not very fulfilling for me. Plenty of spiritual female public figures out there, so it would make sense that offline there is even more. But it’s still a minority, and hard to find them, especially if you look for them in clubs lol.

Thank you for your contribution. We have only discussed this for 9 pages

Do I sense that you want me to ask you further questions? Or am I reading you wrong? Yes, getting a girl to fall into my ”normie” frame is easy. What’s much harder is to get her to following me in spirituality, and anyway, that would be getting close to cult practices. The way cults works is kinda the same way: the leader and the environment is so strong in their ideals, that people (weak frame, normies, most people) get hypnotized into it, don’t question, and just follow blindly — because the frame of the leader is so strong and certain. Basically most of society to be honest. Just on more socially acceptable frames. And hence, this is what most of socialization also is.

Well, first of all I need to stop wasting so much time on empty socializing, and put that time into real work. In practice, I should make some higher conscious content. And come up with a creative way to get good views for it. But more importantly, I need to use my dancing, as that would separate me from most conscious content out there. It’s such a not-known thing here in Finland that I might hit the news, if I actively go to the public to dance and to share love. I do want to mix higher conscious content in my dancing heavily tho, so I will probably be giving speeches on healing, love, empathy etc. Using dancing as a form of inspirating others, rather than as a performance. Also, using dancing to heal others in the form of dance therapy, and letting go. Here’s a few practical steps. I still have many many decades left in my life to leave a bigger impact. Hitting the news etc. would be nice to get my name out there, so I can find my tribe to connect with, and to help.

I would love it to be natural. But which normie is going to fall into my metaphysical frame naturally, unless I hard manuever and seduce her into it? And even then it’s most likely not going to happen.

The positive side to this is that it is also peak time to dancing in public and to spread love. During winter it is very hard to do so. Focusing my time doing this would be way more aligned.

What I have forgotten to mention in my situation is the following pain: Taking a real liking to a girl, her taking a real liking to me. Then having to break both of our hearts, due to incompatibility. But not only that, as an empathetic person, I not only get my own heart broken, but I feel the pain of her heartbreak. Do this a few times in a row, and knowing very well that no matter how many times I do this in a row, it won’t work out because I’m in the wrong environment — exhaustion is the end result. It is also exhausting to seduce her into liking me. But if I was fully authentic and genuine from the get go, we would not build anything to begin with. All this games is just exhausting.

In Integral’s example, he is not surrounded by hot girls.

You miss the point of the strategy. The idea is to have short interactions with everyone in the venue, making friends, generating attraction then bouncing. All this gives you massive social proof, and opportunity to reapproach later in the night.

I find it so hard to let go of socializing with normies. Or socializing altogether. Yet I find it exhausting to be so fake with people. What makes it all worse is that it’s peak summer here. And summer lasts 3 months. In an ideal world, we would have people like us in this community almost everywhere. The world would be way more beautiful, and socializing would be way more genuine.

Yes, this is ultimately the problem. But to take it further, it’s more like: Better McDonalds than starving to death. Where in the world can I find healthy food to eat?