PureRogueQ

Was thinking about problem of time and continuity today, then again it comes to what you define as time. What I found was that continuity is just change in experience , but if we look at time and do not go by standard measure, which if you really think about it can't be really measured, it is just objective marker of experience that in a sense could not even mean that markers are at exact same distance , or that there is distance to begin with. Anyhow it is pretty clear to everyone that one moment can feel like forever and 1 hour can feel like it went past in a moment . Which reminds me of movie Lucy where they present screen of highway and car driving on it , what happens if you make car drive faster and faster and then increase it to infinity, car will disappear. Now if we think of the screen as a time and continuity as car it makes sense.

Well, I did some tests based on my previous posts about involvement, I am far from conclusions and there is lot more to be done to clarify stuff, know how it works and how to get there in easy way and it for sure will not fix your ego problems. Don't want to make any claims and will just put it as I understand it at this moment. There are things like overlays of experience that encompass rest of things that happen in experience, might be just brain chemical but who cares, main thing is it changes how you connect to same behaviours ,actions, ego talk and so on. So this involvement, or love changes this overlay of experience and encompass you with different energy, thing with this energy is that it does not care what you do it is sorta like bliss, you are good no matter what, but , it is also dangerous to navigate for reasons. And yes it is completely sustainable, not 1 h, 1 day thing.

I don't want to even try, it is really pointless, but lets call it your home maybe that is far far away.

Sounds like what I mean by true awareness for most part, but it is not what I would imply as Nothingness.

I don't want to say what you can and can't do, for certain you can become true awareness it self, after that can actually go beyond your limitation of logic, can you fully grasp it, or even become it I don't know, I did not went all the way in with it as it was breaking point for me and it is better for you to dive in yourself if you really want to see.

Unknowing and rising awareness simultaneously

Nothingness is not nothing, it is simply something you can't really put in words or even make concept of , because it is beyond our logical capacity.

Yes, it is there you just skim trough it like something you don't want to see, like when you argue and know that you are wrong, but still continue to argue, or when something happens and you convince yourself that it is not what happened because you would never hold such beliefs, so you just turn blind eye to it, or you could just as well be so used to doing something that gets registered in subliminal level , so you kinda do and kinda don't notice it, because you have to be present to notice such changes, or else you will have to recall from memory, but how can you recall something like that from memory. K you are always present, more present then present.

That is not true , you can feel no lack or incompleteness, disappointment or your experience not being not good enough, you can have most deep and beautiful encounters in life , just as you can have terrible time, in my opinion it is because humans simply do not know much about them self, what they are capable of and how to properly use what they have.

Funny, so have been trying lots of stuff lately, well as usual and came to conclusion no matter what I do there is some problem when it comes to elevate wellbeing as it does not hold together as well as you might want it to , so I have come to new idea, I know idea, but idea is that life requires for you to be involved in it, involved is not even the right word for it , misleading. It is just main building block of happiness, I know my explanation of this idea here is really vague and there is lots more to really say to it, but I think this is where love comes in, as it is one thing that can express involvement in anything , in so many different ways, because I know there will people out there who will think that love is like Conor Murphy style thing, I guess it can , but there are is way more to it and does not have to be like that at all. And I am not by no means saying that it is all you need, involvement can be painful, there are lots of people who are involved , their suffering does not come from lack of involvement, my point of this post was really to point out that life requires involvement, without it, there is nothing to be happy about. Maybe word love is not right word because of how misunderstood it can be, but who cares , just wanted to share for fellow explores alike.

Just close eyes feel the peace , relaxation it brings, merge with it, that is at least what I have been doing for a while, people should know the difference between body relaxation and hearth & mind relaxation, you can be relaxed with non relaxed body and vice verse.

Just like everything, without eyes there will be no sight, without tongue there will be no taste, should I gouge my eyes out?

I am just trying to figure this stuff out at the moment, because it is very counterintuitive, first you must know which part is that is responsible, then you have memory that we probably can't escape, it is there and then there is game of what was first action or reaction and how to change something that is already true.

I think you have twisted understanding of what ego is, it seems you think actions = ego, non action = ego. It might be true that when you transcend ego you just move up a ladder , but it is just ladder of human form, but it does not disqualify lose of ego you had before.

Well it depends on what kinds of suffering you have, but really , just breathwork helps to relax your system, another thing you can try is to loosen up your resistances, it need certain degree of will to let go and understanding of your own actions, actions are that which come in form of reflection of inner and outer space, although it is always taking place in inner space. One of things lately discussed is time, you do not even have to let it go completely, just understanding how much suffering constant inner clock causes can let you loosen its grip on you, making it possible to just enjoy present moment without thinking about how great you will feel after 8h when your shift ends and how bad it is now , how much time is left till break because you can rest then, how you still need to drive 2h to get to destination where something good is going to wait you and lots of other stuff. You get stuck in waiting for better making your present moment unbearable, often you will not even noticed it, it will be just spinning your mind. Second thing is your actions , or rather reactions and it is really very deep topic , I am not sure how to formulate it right now, but I will try to explain as I can, because there is difference between inner reflection and outer reflection, as much as you can ignore your thoughts , you can't ignore your actions, or rather you can ignore them, but ignoring them will not stop actions from happening, where with thoughts in my opinion it is not that important, I would rather have thoughts that I do not care about then have actions that I do not care about , but they can get me jobless , or in jail for example. To make it more clear actions can range from, how you act with certain people in certain scenario, to how you walk, open doors, basically do anything. Most important for this I would say just being honest, loving with yourself, which just means having clear vision of what is happening and you do not need to be observer state , or anything like that, just see what you are reflecting on yourself, which means first there is reflection then there is action. Try to really see why you do things you do, very often you might seem confused, it makes no sense, but trust me , you can tell what is reason behind most if not all of it and it is not really hidden anywhere, it is just very egoistic ignorance of it, when ignorance is seen it can be healed. There is to much to write about this topic to make more sense of it, sorry if it is not enough , maybe there are people less lazy then me.

Well as J. Krishnamurti says you have to give up time, while realizing that no matter what you do, you are the same thing that you try to escape while trying to escape, which leads to endless pointless trying in time. At least that is what I got whit my 1 digit brain cells I put together to try and understand this genius. Seems legit if you ask me, for me personally I am still trying to understand if mirror is problem, or certain aspects it reflects cause problem, do we really have to throw it all away because if you do you lose some aspects of potential in you, maybe I am just being stubborn.

I guess it depend on your goal, for example if you want to help to build better understanding for sake of everyone you will have to suffer ,it is inevitable but to go trough suffering with such interests, you have to fall over and over again to build better understanding from such places, it is ridiculously funny how many times you think you really got it just to realize it is just reflection of what is true , but not actual picture of what is true, well I guess it is reflection either way, but you can make this picture more clear. There are great teachings all over the place, unfortunately they are so easy to misunderstand that it is like reading Bible, just as Leo said, Spirituality at current time is that of a stone age, misunderstood and lacking any proper structure.

suffering of thought is really no different of suffering without thought, if you can sway suffering that comes in form of thought you can do the same with no thought. Not to say that you can't have thought

Maybe problem is in you thinking that thinking is only dimension in control of your experience, do you need to think to move your body, have more awareness, clarity, energy or just general feeling ?

Problem is that you completely misunderstand what it means, it doesn't mean do nothing and live as you lived , what is the point to give such pointless practice that changes nothing, might as well have said nothing. You are controlling anyway, difference is do you know what you are doing , or you just act impulsively on your experience, doing nothing is doing too. What not controlling anything and letting go means is that you observe and are aware of your experience, but at the same time you do not identify , cling to what is arising, it means for example thought "that guy over there is looking at me like he wants me to punch his teeth out" arises, what you don't do is identify with this thought , identifying will make you angry at the poor guy and more thoughts will come , or you don't make counterarguments in your head like, it is wrong to think like that , why am I thinking like that , just observe without any identification , if thought persists it means that you are doing something wrong, if you feel anger , or anything related to that thought you are doing it wrong.

connect on what?

You do not need to mediate, just like you are now, do you need to mediate to see what is going on in your experience now?

Continuity has nothing to do with objective time probably, from my experience at least, losing objective time means just that you do not feel time, you are not concerned by time as if there is no better or worse time, because for you there is no difference in this matter, but it does not mean that you do not recognize continuity, change in experience, or you do not know conceptual meaning of time as for example, at this time I need to be there, or do that.

You are doing it anyway, when it comes to thoughts, feelings, actions. what you can do is recognise that it is true, it is there without judgement or anything really, if you will try to work trough it you will just create more story out of what is arising. It is good place to start, but it is just one dimension of your experience.

Who said you don't go insane, after you have cut yourself to pieces, doubted, believed , experienced so much different stuff you will hardly remember what you were about when you started. Most people are used to live with their personality for all of their life, even changes is characteristic is big deal for them, now comes mediation and first state of bliss, insights and their are big deal for you, then comes many different states from flow, to observer and so on and again it is a big deal, at certain point constant new stuff and changes are nothing special , I mean they are just that, something different. It is probably wiser to keep to one teaching if you want to be more sane.