Ken Lecoq

Real Truth... Not the scientific truth, or all the stories one can belive ; I'm just talking about the truth that is always in front of us. For enlightenment if you prefer. But from an enlightened perspective, in harmony with truth, death is pointless, so... But It's an interesting question to ask yourself, it can show you the most important values you hold now in your life

@shouldnt My thoughts are starting to be confused...And that's great... Let's do self-inquiry. One part of me is saying that this discussion is ridiculous because you are trying to convince me that you are right an me wrong, and that if I give you a reply, I would be doing the same thing. For this part of me, that's total chimpery. Another part of me is questionning the sexual life that I have (well, I don't have any sexual life, that's what i'm questionning)... Because in the inside, I feel that I need to have sexual experiences before transcending the ego and achieving enlightenment. Why don't I feel any need for sex ? It's difficult to answer that... I never did masturbation, so I never really felt the pleasure of it, that might be why I feel I don't need it, that's because I don't know it, I never experienced it. Now, on the other hand, I have a fear... I'm afraid of the pleasure I could get from it. What if I like it too much ? What if I become addict to it ? I don't want to waste time doing that because I feel that it would be a waste of time... But woult it really be a waste of time ? I don't know... I am proud of what I belive I am... Proud of me because I never did masturbation; i feel diferent, out of the mainstream, and I'm proud of that. Now, I see that this pride and this fear are bullshit. I think I need to try. Why I am even talking on this forum if I never had any experience ? I really have to question myself more and to try masturbation... At least I will fight my so precious self image that I have now. It might be a necessary step toward enlightenment. Now... all your questions x) I don't take any mediaction, and when I'm sick, I take medicinal plants. I don't have mental disorder... I don't feel like having one at all. My diet is so strange... I was fat till 14, I constructed a low self image, peoples were judging me a lot because of my weight at school; I decided to loose weight, and I lost 20 kg at the age of 15, My diet was almost 0% fat. Afterward, I understood that I was wrong again, and now I eat kind of normal... kind of, I still eat too much sugar, mostly when I'm tired, It might be because of a lack of affection (might be related to sex as well). I exercise everyday, I walk a lot, while reading, or listening to Leo's videos, or while meditating. My body image... Normal 63 kg for 1.70m, I don't feel bad about it at all. I can walk during hours and hours, that's great, and I feel quite good looking (yes, another judgement I have on myself image). I might be demisexual or not, I just don't know. I think I lack experience and for now I'm like a little child, I can only tell you that womens are attractive from my point of view. I will try masturbation this week or the next one, and the way I feel about myself might change, or not, I don't know. But it seems disgusting fo me to do that, I don't know why. I have to overcome it... But I think that there are a lot of hidden causes that I'm not aware of for now. Well, thanks @shouldnt what you said encouraged me to do self inquiry about me and my sexuality.

@shouldnt If there is a need for me, I don't feel it... It might be an unconscious need... I don't know. I don't feel like I need it, and I'm not feeling that I'm denying myself from pleasure at all. The day I have a girlfriend, I will learn this aspect of myself, great ; but If a don't have any girlfriend in this life, that's great too, I will accept whatever is coming to me. Now... Me and @Sigma are trying to demonstrate you the we are right and you wrong ; and you are trying to demonstrate us that you are right and us wrong... That's pointless... Maybe we should accept and respect the point of view of everyone. Everybody is right in the end, there is nothing wrong. Now, thanks @Dhana Choko That's true. Now, if some of you have question about how is the life without the feeling of a need for sex or masturbation, feel free to ask.

Saitama, stoping masturbation doesn't necessarily means holding everything always... Well, for me, sometimes, I do ejaculate at night, maybe once every week or two weeks. I don't feel any problem, and I'm healthy. If it's the main reason for what you do it, it's based on fear... Maybe you think about it... If you feel like it's not right for you, stop it... If you feel that you need it, keep doing ^^ Some of my friends are telling me the same thing "Once you start it, tou won't be able to stop"... But I don't know, I just don't feel any need or desire to masturbate... And sometimes I go watch porn (once a month maybe), but after 10/15minutes, my interest and desire go away... I don't feel any need for now, is it healthy, is it unhealthy, is it good, is it bad, I don't know, I just feel very good the way I am now, and that's all.

Yes you do get grumpy and prone to stress when you don't masturbate... Does that means that I should get grumpy and stressfull as well ? I never did masturbation, and I am one of the most quiet and patient person you could possibly imagine. It's like what @Naviy explained. That's right, I'm attracted to peoples with whom I have an emotional bound. Or other kind of bond, maybe spiritual bond or whatever. "Demisexuality" looks like another box you put people in... That might be right, and that might be wrong, I really don't know. I never had sex. Maybe I'm gonna be sex addict after trying; Maybe I won't like it, I don't know. I just know that I let life guide me and that I'm on the path toward spiritual enlightenment. Thansk for your reply anyway

Thanks for explaining your point of view. You are right, and adding an important aspect. I do agree, and if I encounter a girl who is clear about that, and just want to have sex for entertainement, not necessarily in name of "true love", well I won't hesitate a second... If she is clear about it. It's just that the girls I encounter don't think like that, they are also looking for "the one". I see that there are a lot of lies involved in the realtionships today. Few peoples are being 100% honest ; they lie to the other one and to themselves. If I try to seduce a girl just for fun, if it's a superficial kind of girl, I have to lie to her and to myself. I just want to be honest and truth, I don't want to tell her stuff I don't really think. I don't want to lie to anybody. I do have desires, but if I need to lie in order to fulfill them, that's ridiculous for me. I'm sure life is going to giving me the posibility to live sex while being truth with her and myself. It can be in name of true love, or in name of simple entertainement, but truthfully.

Well, MonikaBcn... The truth for me is that I don't really know what to think about sex, and I don't really want to think about it. What I meant is that I don't feel that I need sex, so I won't go outside and seduce a girl just in order to have sex. For exemple, last november, I went to Balaguer's Fiesta mayor (Lleida, ES), and I spend the night with a couple of attractive girls; the girls in spain are much more open than french girls, and they seemed much easier to seduce... But they were all too superficial... I had a lot of fun, because I don't have fears anymore (thanks to the beautiful teachings of "simple-pick-up" and "simple sexy stupid")... But I didn't felt il love... at all... Well, it's kind of frustrating, because I'm 19, and all the girls I meet when I go out seems so blind to me... I know this is just judgements my ego is making... But I'm just not falling in love with girls who seems so blind to my ego. One of my friends told me that when he had sex with someone he didn't really love, just in order to fulfill the need, he felt very bad abou it... that it didn't fulfilled him at all, and he feld disgusted about himself afterward, because it wans't truth for him. This discussion I had wit him impacted me. That's what i meant by "I would feel like a lier". For now, I didn't felt in love for now, and I never had any opportunity to have sex (I mean, with someone I love)... And I totally accept it, I feel very good about it, and appart from the desire I have wen looking at a sexy girl, I don't feel any need. If one day I fall in love, I wont reject it, I will allow myself to fully live this experience. But if I don't, well, I will fully accept it as well, because I feel that's not a need for me. Just accepting whatever life give me, and follow the flow. The discovering of truth ann enlightenment is the most important for me... It sex is on this path, I will accept it, great, if not, i will accept the absence of sex, great as well.

Thanks a lot @Leo Gura . I have a friend who have a cabin in the woods... I will ask him After I do it, I'm gonna post the result on the forum ^^

It's not that easy ... Well, it's easy to talk... But there are thousands miles between saying "just become enlightened and that will be resolved" and actually discovering enlightenment for real... You talk about enlightenement as if it was as easy as buying a bagette in bakery x) Well, the only thing I could advise you,Frankie , woud be : Keep studying personal development and spiritual enlightenment, and meditate.

You really should do that, this book list is worth the money leo ask for it. If you truly want to learn about spiritual enlightenment, that might be a great decision. Leo talks about more than 10 excellent books about this topic, and I'm sure he is gonna expand this list with more books about enlightenment. Well, I can only tell you that I did and I don't regret this decision at all !!! Moreover, you can encounter some of the books leo talks about for free on gen.lib.rus.ec. ^^

And if you are truly honest with yourself, Jip, how do you feel in the inside ? Did you really transcended your desires ? Or are you just repeating what leo told you ? What kinds of thoughts do you have when seeing a girl like this one (yes, I know, that correspond to the feminin ideal society sold us, but that's the one I have, because I grew up in this society) : I feel like that you are just repeating what leo told you to be seen as superior... Be carefull, superiority is a trap on the path of spiritual enlightenment. If you do feel sexual desires (for mens or womens), the best solution isn't necessarily to hide them just because someone told you it was unnessary. If the desire is here, there might be a reason, and you might need to live a relationship before transcending the desire (well, I talk for myself at the same time, cause that's the way I feel). Well, just be truth and honest with yourself, and don't deny your fellings, some things might necessary for you to live before totally discovering enlightenment.

I personnally never did masturbation, and i'm virgin for now. But I feel very good. If I don't do masturbation, that's just because I don't want to, and I absolutely don't feel this need at all. I do have desires, but for now, i didn't feld in love, and I won't have sex with a girl a don't really love, cause it would be just for pleasure, and I would feel like a lier. Should sex be a need ? Why is it a need for almost everybody ? Who told me that I needed to have sex in order to be happy ? You can perfectly live without sex, and very happy. It depends on each person. Be honest and truth with yourself. If you decide to stop sex in order to pursue enlightenment because Leo told you it was chimpery, but in the inside you are craving so much for it, you aren't aligned with the truth. You have to be honest with yourself, and do what is right for you right now. Accept what is. At some point, if you keep doing spiritual enlightenment work, you will transcend the need for sex. But let things happend when they need to happend. If you feel like you really need sex now, well, have some, but keep your self actualization work.

Well... Paranormal experiences does exist, for sure, and the experiences you had are interesting, thanks for sharing I personally don't really "belive" in paranormal stuff, but i don't reject it neither. I'm just open to the possibility that everything is always possible. As I'm learning about spiritual enlightenment and personal development, I start to know some people open to the spirits world, and it's very interesting (peoples with medium abilities, able to contact spirits). I'm taking a course about that (well, it will be in march), named "clair ressenti" (in France), basically, it's about learning how to feel presences (spirits, or whatever) around us, and communicate with them. One of my friend (she is very advanced on the path toward enlightenment) alreadt started this course, she told me that it was very interesting, because a lot of stff you need to learn in order to be able to contact those spirits are very similar to the teachings about enlightenment. My mother also told me paranormal experiences she had. 20 years ago, my parents lived in a appartment, and one night, a couple in the appartment had a intense quarrel, and the man of this couple killed himself as a result (he jumped from the appartement, and died on the floor). My mother went to rescue him, and saw him dead on the floor. My mother was buddhist at that time (and never stopped buddhism), and she pronounced a mantra near him, in order to help his spirit (namu myo ho renge kyo). As she did that, she literally felt the spirit of this guy going into her body, the spirit was trying to possess my mother. My mother decided to go in front of the altar she had at that time and to pronounce some chapters of the "lotus sutra". At a certain point, she felt the spirit of the guy going out of her body, and that was done. She told me that it was a very intense experience for her. She had other experiences with spirits, and i know more friends who had a lot of experiences. The paranormal and the spirits world are very interesting tipics. That's why I want to learn about that, and learn to contact spirits, in order to help others. In the chapter 13 of "the end of your world", Adyashanti talk about an paranormal experience he had during an enlightenment experience, he saw a lot of his past lives... But while he did so, he didn't had any concept about space, time or anything, he had to forgot everything he belived in order to see that. I think that we are goint to talk more and more about the paranormal on this forum, because as we are doing spiritual enlightenement work, we naturally open ourself to those experiences. It's much better not to belive in anything, but to be open to any possibility, and accept everything you encounter.

Yes it is 19 years old. I'm quite surprised, there are quite a lot of teenagers, that's great ^^ And that's great as well to have middled aged and old peoples

I don't know what kind of "explanation" you are waiting for... Another voice explaining you what you are ? What you are can't be explained... It can't be articulated with words. If you are concerned about this absence of response, you must be mistaken. Who is waiting for the response ? Who is concerned ? Who is the I who wants an explaination ? That's what you should be asking yourself. When I read what you are asking, Saitama, I see that the "I" who is waiting for an explaination is your illusory self image. You have to go deeper and forget everything you belive about yourself. The cup must be empty before reciving the experience of your true self.

It's trickier... Focusing on sensations is great, but you need to go beyond if you really want to keep your mind still, without thoughts. When I focus on a sensory perception (like breathing for example), my thoughts are filled with conceptions about the perception; "the voice" of the thoughts is much more quite, but I'm still thinking about the sensation I'm focusing on, those thoughts aren't "voices" but ideas and images about the sensation. For example, if I'm focusing on my breathing, I'm having more thoughts about the breathing process (the lungs, the air mouvements...). It's very subtle, those thoughts aren't "voices", they are ideas, concepts, images. As well as you need to calm down "the voices", you also need to let those more subtle thoughts go away. Here is what I do when I meditate : I'm sitting or walking, eyes closed or open, doesn't matter (well, you may want to start meditating sitting with the eyes closed), and I just forgot everything I know about reality... I let everything go. "Voices" are coming (and that's normal), but I just let them fly away, I don't focus or speculate on them. While I'm calming down the "voices" this way, I'm much more aware of the sensory perceptions I've got (the breathing, the sensations of my body position); and I'm tring to become aware of those subtle thoughts (the concepts and ideas about the sensations). When I grasp a concept or an idea I've got about the sensation, I tell myself "that's just a concept, just forget it, let it go"... and I let it go. What helps me as well is "acceptance". Acceptance is a very important key in spirituality. I just accept whatever is that I'm living right now, right here; this is the the way it is, that's it, I just accept that, and forget everything I belive about the perceptions I've got. It's easy to talk about it this way, but when you are meditating, you see that's not that easy, that you have a lot of conceptions, belifs, and ideas about every single one of your perceptions. You might need to practice quite a lot before achiving a real quiteness. Good luck, and keep meditating ^^