Jon_Bundesen

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About Jon_Bundesen

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  1. Life purpose advice niche
    difficulty finding my niche
    In this case a realistic path forward would involve you first working on commercial videos to build up your skills, experience, and reputation. Then you could branch off and start a company/service where you specifically target more artsy clients who can appreciate what you offer.
    When you start business you usually have to send some years cutting your teeth on commercial work.
    In fact many filmmakers began their careers working literally on TV commercials. Working on artsy projects is usually something you have to earn.
    There are niches for artsy work but you'll have to figure out who those clients would be and what kind of services they need.
    But also, don't get too attached to your medium. You should be somewhat flexible about your medium. The medium should ultimately serve your highest impact. If your medium is too limiting, consider upgrading to something which more directly serves your impact statement. Why are you so attached to editing being the way for raising collective consciousness. There might be more direct ways of raising collective consciousness than splicing videos.
    Or maybe then you don't really care about raising collective consciousness? Maybe you care more about video? In which case you need to re-think your impact statement.

  2. Being funny is also about people valueing you
    On becoming funny
    Also status has to do with you being considered funny or not. 
    Laughing at someones joke is like a bonding experience. People want to bond with people that they value/have high status. 
    For example: Almost nobody laughs at the sharp joke the nerdy kid at school makes. Almost everyone laughs at the dumb comment the most popular kid in class makes. 
    Also with girls. When a girl likes you she will giggle at all the dumb shit that comes out of your mouth. When she doesn't like you, not so much. 
     
    The real art is in the stuff I described in my first post though. 
     

  3. Dealing with toxic friends
    Be Alone Or To Hang Out With "toxic People"?
    Neither being alone or being with your friends is the answer. Sure, you shouldn't spend all of your time submerged in negativity, but there is probably a lot you can learn from them. A way that you can go a little deeper within yourself is to try to remain completely aware of the situation you're in, the people you're around, and realize the bliss of the moment. I think a good balance between solitude and socializing (no matter who it is) is necessary, as with anything. It's almost like two realties at once. Your inner reality where you are content and aware with everything happening around you and open to new experience, and the outer reality of your environment where your oblivious friends are playing in. 
    I find that when I categorize people as negative, I'm cutting myself off from experience that I need. Keep in mind, I say negative as in people who aren't aware as you, or have bad mental habits. If they are engaging in illegal or detrimental acts, by all means stay far away. 
    I too have no friends who I consider aware, but that has no effect on my own awareness. I continue to grow myself regardless of the people around me. I know it may be impossible with some people, but maybe suggest doing something with your friends like spending time in nature, or slowly introduce them to subjects (psychological, spiritual, scientific etc.) that might help them to get on the same path as you. 

  4. Implating progress to the subconscious
    Difficulty finishing the life purpose course
    When it came to stuff I had to study that I had a lot of resistance to, I would use the Pomodoro technique. (25 minutes studying with absolutely NO distractions and 5 minutes break) 
    AND I would track my progress my moving physical objects like magnets, or objects in glass jars, that way my subconscious could see me making progress. I would also give myself big checkmarks on a Calander every day I put time in. 
     
    Scheduling very specific times to get on it is very important too. This will mitigate procrastination. 
     
    FORCE YOURSELF to set a goal, to set a time. 
     
    Most of the resistance in just in starting the practice. 

  5. Get interested about your life purpose
    Stuck in Life Purpose Course
    @Meretagh If you don't know your life purpose yet, your life purpose should be to find your life purpose.
    Which should be enough to get you seriously interested in reading books about LP and doing research.
    Do you want to live a passionate life?
    Yes?
    Then how can you not be passionate about reading a few books about how to create a passionate life???
    That's like wanting to be a millionaire but then saying, "Oh man... I don't want to read these books about becoming a millionaire."
    Think it through. Connect the dots.
    As I said in the Life Is A Maze video, you're in a maze whether you like it or not. So you might as well get curious and passionate about doing research to figure this maze out. You got something more important to do?
    To be successful at life you gotta love learning about how life works. Why don't you love learning about life?

  6. Why girls are indirect
    How to get let in clubs solo
    Yeah, they will say they want a chill sweet girl but in practice they end up having sex with the hottest girl even if is a crazy spoiled twat.
    There is truth to this. Because most girls are not thinking about attraction or sex at all, their logical paradigm is about how to land a committed guy.
    Girls cannot be as honest as guys because they will look like sluts and this will lower their value.
    A girl is not allowed to say, "I just want to be fucked by the baddest player tonight", even if she craves that. She also tends to believe that she can get the best of both worlds: a super attractive guy who will also treat her like a princess. This is the girl's fantasy. She is not thinking about how that super attractive guy is super attractive precisely because he is banging 5 other girls each week who are hotter than her. All she feels is that he's hot.
    Since guys are logical they can be more straight forward. Girls do not sit down and logically analyze their sex life. They run more on feelings, which tend to be fickle and less consistent than logical analysis.

  7. Ideal Medium
    help me Find my Ideal medium !
    Lots of different ways to do that. Podcasts, videos, blog, tutoring, writing books,  and you can do it on any level locally with different groups and such. You could also do some sort of website or similar where you can blend the perspectives and studies together. A lot of it will come down how you enjoy to express yourself. You might already find that you are engaging in one of these too. Those are what come to mind, when I think about expressing and sharing that type of stuff. 

  8. Healthy ways to have fun 1
    How do you relax, how you having fun?
    My Personal Favorites. Enjoy
    -reading is a fantastic one: don't just read something that will improve your life as well. Those are good. But also read books that you are just curious about the subject for the sake of learning about that thing. 
    -spending time with quality people
    -contemplating/ reflecting on life
    -Try to explore life a bit and find something your passionate about like writing, or photography, or art, or music etc. Once you find that one thing you really want to sink hours into and see value and joy in, you'll naturally gravitate toward that
    -doing nothing can actually be a profound experience sometimes. Especially if your lifestyle is fast-paced and involves a lot of stimulation on the nervous system like eating lots of different types of foods, electronics, multitasking, using the mind a lot etc.
    -meditation is a fantastic habit
    -Think about doing something just for the sake of doing it rather than having to get something out of the experience. Like if your gonna read, don't just read for what the content in the book can do to improve your life. Read for the sake of the joy of reading! Of course, in the beginning, reading might seem difficult for the mind to adjust to and be a pain in the ass. But as you read more and more, it becomes a flow experience more effortlessly. But reading is just one example.
    -Reflecting on past memories and how far you've come on your journey can be inspiring and fun.
    I played this pc game called starcraft 2 at a really high level for a few years. Long story short I got really passionate about the game and involved in the community. Despite it being just a video game, I learned profound life lessons about myself and the world. I overcame challenges and broke through many of my inner demons in the effort to climb the ladder rankings in that game. After I had outgrown the game and decided it was time to move on, I made a gigantic montage of all my favorite moments in my favorite pro matches with my favorite music in the background. I'm really into video editing so making the thing was just such an expression of pure love and joy and creativity for me.
    now whenever I watch the video again, every time I smile and laugh at all of those good times. Often times I even tear up in joy.

  9. Control your cravings - Leo Gura
    I read a book about Pornography, it left me thinking: Why it's even legal?
    And what about people who eat 20 hot dogs per day and 1 gallon of ice cream and a 6-pack of Coke? Should we ban hot dogs and ice cream and Coke?
    There are far too many juicy things in the world to ban them all. Learn to control your cravings.
    You can install a porn filter on your computer if you really can't hold yourself back.

  10. Porn is a technology - Leo Gura
    I read a book about Pornography, it left me thinking: Why it's even legal?
    Of course it's possible.
    And it's possible to walk to the grocery store rather than using a car.
    But we are technological creatures.
    Once a technology is out, you can't put the toothpaste back in the tube.
    Most guys are NOT going to be satisfied with just their imaginations. Especially now that they've seen porn their whole life.

  11. Dirty feeling - Leo Gura
    I read a book about Pornography, it left me thinking: Why it's even legal?
    That's on you. Don't blame the porn for your personal shortcummings.

  12. Porns use - Leo Gura
    I read a book about Pornography, it left me thinking: Why it's even legal?
    You have no idea the complexity of the issue.
    You can't just ban porn. The ban would be less enforceable than a ban on alcohol or weed.
    You can't ban a thing which 99% of people want and love.
    By banning porn you think it would make society healthier, but actually it would do the opposite as now men will have no way of releasing their sexual energy in a safe & healthy way. So now it will manifest in really toxic ways such as rape, violence, abuse, bullying, theft, mass shootings, and terrorism.
    Repressing the sex drive makes it worse, not better.
    If you outgrow porn, good for you. But 99% of society is not ready for that yet and they will come after you with pitchforks for trying to boss them around.
    Porn serves a crucial function in society. You can think of porn stars as essential workers. As essential as farmers.
    There is a very big difference between abstaining from porn by your own free choice vs some authority figure forcing you to abstain from porn when you are not ready for that yet.
    It's foolish to try to legislate peoples' sexual cravings.

  13. Setting boundaries
    How do you deal with bullies?
    Look within yourself. Bullies have a 6th sense for detecting weakness in others. This is usually some emotional vulnerability which they then exploit. How are you vulnerable? Are you passive? Lack of assertiveness? Having difficulty setting boundaries?
    These bullies are showing you exactly what you need to face within yourself.
    Getting jacked, learning martial arts and standing up to them may work, but if you will feel the same inside, I don't think that will deal with the underlying cause.

  14. Bullying - Leo Gura
    How do you deal with bullies?
    I'm a lone wolf type guy so I avoid these issues simply by keep to myself and following my life purpose.
    If someone is being an ass to you, leave their company. If it's a boss or coworker, then that's more challenging but that's basically turning into workplace harassment. You should be able to speak to HR about that and get them to stop. If it's a friend, change friends. If it's a family member, move away from your family or confront them about it. If it's happening at school, just ignore the person and stay away from them.

  15. Sex drive - Leo Gura
    I'll never watch porn again
    Your craving for sex isn't transcended simply by withholding from sex.
    Denial of your sex drive only doubles your problem by adding on an additional layer of guilt and self-hatred.
    The sex drive is not an addiction in the same way smoking is. The sex drive is still there even if you stop. It's more similar to hunger. It's also not unhealthy, like hunger, unless you take it overboard. The sperm your body generates is going to leave your body regardless, so you certainly aren't "saving it".

  16. Fix club anxiety
    Drinking all night at a club was the most soul-cleansing experience I've ever had
    No, it's not that simple. It's just one brute force method that tends to work well for clubbing.
    It does not necessarily address the root issue of your anxiety. But you gotta start somewhere. Sometimes problems auto-correct simply through exposure and practice. If you've been living in your mother's basement, going  out to lots of clubs and socializing will auto-correct much of your social awkwardness, since most of it simply comes from inexperience. Practice builds competence and confidence.

  17. Removing awkardness without alcohol - Leo advise
    Drinking all night at a club was the most soul-cleansing experience I've ever had
    You can certainly go out sober and pump up your state in the club so much that you will feel intoxicated simply on fun. I've done this. It feels like being drunk. Dancing is a great way to pump up your state, as is approaching girls. Lots of approaches will pump your state up to crazy levels. Having good friends with you will also pump your state up.
    The best way to become socially uninhibited it to go out to nightclubs very often and push your comfort zone in the club with dancing, flirting, talking, having fun, etc.
    Hell, you can even fuck in the club! That will pump up your state for sure

  18. Why you get awkard in social situations
    Social Awkwardness since doing this work
    Oh, ive experienced the *exact* same thing. Your thinking too much. notice what you do when you notice it happening...you try to fix it yeah. whats happening is this, your thinking too much, you notice that your thinking too much so you tighten your grip on it so to restrain it with your mind, however this is just implementing more thoughts. 
    What your looking for is to become thoughtless...like a child. anxiety is what it is. you gotta learn the language of silence when it comes. not trying to fix it. also, whatever you look at, is what you are literally creating. By looking at something you cause it to become larger in the eye of your consciousness. By trying to fix your anxiety, as you notice it arise...you cause it to arise further. its like me telling you not to think of the pink elephant...the better thing to do would be to stop reading my reply lol
    Also, look for any possible physical causes of your anxiety. weed makes your anxiety go mad. 
    when the anxiety arises either...*silence*                   .................................................................................  
    ...or get up and dance, look at something else. you are creating it my friend

  19. Effects of dropping out of high school
    Dropping Out Of High-school.
    @Lorcan
    A high-school dropout is ineligible for 90% of jobs in America.
    A high-school graduate’s lifetime income is 50 to 100% higher than a non-graduate’s.
    Until you get even close to your goal, what are you gonna do? Do you have a 1 month, 5 month, 12 month, 1 year, 5 year, 10 year plan for what you are gonna do after you drop out?
    Ok, so barely anyone will hire you. Now what? Start a business? Let's hope you get enough to sustain yourself before investing at least 2 years of time and money into it, while not considering the fact that your business has a very high (90%) chance of falling flat on it's face (look up the numbers, I'm not saying these from the top of my head).
    Or do you think your parents will care for all your needs once you drop out? They will most likely send you to work and guess what? You don't even have a high school degree and nobody will hire you.
    You are free to do what you want. You are just looking here for permission and validation. If that's what you really wanna do, do it, but you won't have the right to complain later if it doesn't work out.

  20. View on dropping out
    Dropping Out Of High-school.
    Here is how I see it. 
    I have a choice, a choice to spend 2 years of my life preparing for a test. This tests gets me points. With these points I can get a "college degree". A College degree "raises" your employment prospects , certain degrees are more in demand then others, especially STEM subjects (Anything in the field of Science, Technology, Engineering and Medicine). The degree ALONE will not get you a job, often A LOT of other work also needs to be put in to get a job with a company. (Some companies do not even require you to have a degree and are more interested in what results you can generate and less about you sat in college for 4 years and passed the exams). Then if I end I get a job , it is almost guaranteed , to be absolutely nothing to with my life purpose.
    Or I could spend those 2 years of my life actually LEARNING practical stuff (theory, that if applied correctly, generates results). I am not looking to be "employed". What my life-purposes entails makes the only use of degrees is for attaining knowledge to do relating my life purpose, and why would I take a college degree for that purpose when I could learn more more effectively or equally as effectively myself?
    I do not like mentioning my life purpose because is sound egotistically ambitious, and perhaps foolish because of how a gargantuan of a task it is.(But then, so is gargantuan the desire for paradise from mankind) I want to Highly Reduce Government corruption (especially in 1st world countries where the corruption is not totalitarian like in North Korea, but more subtle such as in the banking sector and conduct/methods of governing the country) and create a better society, to create as close as you can get to a Utopian society. To make the best society possible  that actually works and that is not some sort of "fantasy", where in for example, Robots do all the Work and everyone is on vacation 24/7
     

  21. Productive free time 1
    Productive free time
    Spend time in nature, read a book, build a concentration practice, do self inquiry, contemplate using a journal, build your One Note, watch a documentary, study spiral dynamics, organize your room, minimize your room, reduce your distractions, clean up your diet, clean up your closet, throw away all the non essential things, reduce your information intake, make a list of goals, fix your morning routine, fix your night routine, meditate. 

  22. Socializing fundamental
    Difficulty Socializing & Making Friends
    Sounds to me like you just need much more experience socializing.
    Socialization is just like tennis. To get good at it you must have many opportunities to practice.
    So very practically you need to change your life around so that you have more socialization opportunities on a regular basis. The rest will mostly auto-correct.
    You can't get good at socializing if you're alone most of the time.
    There is no specific way that you must be when you socialize. You can basically be totally natural unless you're some kind of psycho, in which case you'll have to reign that in. Be chill, friendly, pleasant, playful, honest, expressive, and relaxed. That usually works best.
    You'll be amazed at how often people just accept you exactly for how you are. Perhaps the biggest mistake of learning to socialize is to try to act a certain way to please people or meet their expectations. Just be you. Not everyone will jive with you, but that doesn't matter.
    Be comfortable in your own skin. Act with strangers the same way you'd act with close family. Assume everyone already knows each other. Don't try to act cool or impressive.
    As simple as all these things are, it can take years to learn. Especially if you've developed bad habits.

  23. trouble socializing and making friends
    Difficulty Socializing & Making Friends
    I find it difficult to maintain friendships with people, it is as if though they lose interest after a while. Around people, I don't know which way to act to make them like me, I usually try being funny, doing spontaneous things or asking them questions, all the while they are distant and don't want anything to do with me. Usually, I am the one that always has to ask and make plans, I basically never get invited out anywhere. I am in my late teens, this meaning that I probably am better off than if I were in my twenties when it comes to this problem.
     
    I have watched a multitude of different videos including Leos "How To Be Attractive" and I have trouble understanding how that theory is implemented and manifested in day to day social interaction. I often find myself in awkward pauses and not knowing what to say. Should I be polite? Should I be disagreeable? Should I ask them questions about them? Should I talk about me? Should I run away from speaking about abstract topics? Should I be optimistic about everything? I don't know which way to behave, they all seem to not work. I also don't want to appear as a loner (which I very much am).
     
    Fundamentally I would like to reach a point where I could make friends and have a friend group, where I could play the leader. I often find myself overthinking about who I am being and whether they like me or not.
     
    I have read Nathaniel Brandon's work and a multitude of other books on emotional stability as well as assertivity but the problem persists to be part of my life.
     
    My question to the reader:
    What is it that is making people not want anything to do with me? What behavior traits should I start to embody so that I can have friends? Which places is it best to go to meet people?

  24. Keep going cold turkey!
    How To Stop An Hard Addiction
    1) Uninstalling games, deleting accounts, selling hardware, and blocking all video game blogs/review websites from your browser works very well.
    2) Find some alternative means of relaxation/fun. You need some outlet.
    3) If you do end up playing a game, as you play very mindfully observe how it doesn't really feel satisfying. It's always disappointing in some way. Try to really SEE that. That will help break your attachment.
    Going cold turkey works pretty well for video games. Just don't expect never to backslide. You will. That's okay. Just keep going cold turkey, and each time you will break a bit more of the attachment until you finally get sick of this whole cycle.

  25. Don't be a jerk
    Best pickup courses and forums?
    Noooo, don't go down the path of being a jerk just because you think it'll get you more girls. (Link removed by moderator) and I really regret it.
    Don't be a pushover - and don't be a doormat.  But you can be a genuinely nice dude and get laid - I'm ridiculously nice to girls. (I'm just not a pushover - I have my own boundaries and I'm not afraid to walk away if a girl does something that's a dealbreaker to me).
    Ever read the book "No More Mr Nice Guy"? Start with that if you haven't.
    Usually when a guy says "I feel like I'm too much of a nice guy" what he really means is "I never stand up for myself" or "I try too hard to please girls" or "I have difficulty putting my needs first."
    But again, you definitely don't need to be a jerk in order to get laid/keep girls around.