mrPixel

How does honesty and kindness factor into you value system? No worries, it's something I do on the regular, I may have been projecting my shit onto you. Cheers

Being consistent with health commitments and taking action into a more meaningful career.

Most people aren't going to see things your way so trying to change someone's mind is not going to be fruitful. I share my perspective and my experience and if the other person can't relate then I leave them alone. I might challenge them, but I'm not interested in changing their mind. Peoples' views don't change until they get enough life experience to see the fault in their thinking. You have no control over what they experience. Kindness and acceptance is a sign of spiritual maturity. Be curious about how people came to see things the way they do, be kind, and appreciate them for who they are. If you have 5 minutes check out this video. Neuroscientist Tali Sharot shares some wisdom as to why you can't change someone's mind: Be on the look out for thoughts like this: Humility is the key to growth. Stop assuming you're superior and try to learn from everyone you meet. Everyone has something that you don't.

Drinking too much, people pleasing, not following my heart out of fear

@BipolarGrowth You are making conclusions based on symptoms. Quite frankly, based on what the OP's description is sounds more like a comedown from a high. In dark night territory you have become aware of the following truths: nothing lasts, nothing will ever match up to your ideals, you have limited control in life, the future is uncertain, safety is an illusion. The OP didn't mention any of this. @Arje You say that you can't explain, but you need to get real clear on how your mind is operating. Life feels meaningless for a reason. How come? Look at your thoughts.

Most people only thrive in certain social environments. Fun people do well in fun social environments. Deep thinkers do well with other deep thinkers. Extroverts like larger social gatherings, introverts prefer smaller ones. I think you are underestimating your abilities because you aren't in the right environments and aren't around the right people. You need to get clear on the type of environments you like and the type of people you do well with. This whole spiritual path is not about changing, it's about getting clear on your values and accepting. Stop trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. I am an introvert and would not consider myself an exciting person. I am not boring by any means, I crack jokes and what not, but I don't do the party thing and I don't like environments where there are a lot of people. I feel like a fish out of water. I used to try to fit in, but eventually realized it wasn't going to happen. Then I realized I prefer to hang out with smaller groups of people who enjoy deeper conversation. So, that's what I do. Problem solved. But to answer your original question, you become more skilled socially by socializing with people you like. Find people who you like, and who appreciate you for who you are, and just hang out and talk.

@Galyna f you are in dark night you will feel manic one moment and depressed the next. These oscillations can be scary and confusing. You are starting to realize that you have no solid ground. Nothing is certain, all of life is unsatisfactory, and nothing lasts. Dark night is about acceptance. You will have to accept yourself as you are and embrace all of life's challenges. Meditate and learn to breathe properly, the breath will soothe the mind and make this process much easier. If you can afford a therapist get one. They can help a lot with this particular stage. Take care of your life and your health. Don't throw it all away. All is well.

We are never going back to normal. We'll just adapt and learn to cope. This is a transformational time in our history.

I personally like to be direct and subtle. I'll say, "Are you single? I'd like to take you out sometime." There are also times when I find myself with a girl and I haven't expressed my intention and I'll just say, "Do you just want to be friends, or do you want something more with me?" The key is to be honest and direct without being creepy. Look them in the eye, speak clearly and confidently, and don't waiver. Avoid the friend-zone at all cost. I highly suggest that you read the book Models by Mark Manson. That will put you on the right track.

Hey all, I went to the dentist this week and they found a spot in my mouth. I have an appointment to get a biopsy on Sunday to find out if it's cancer. Let's just say that it does not look good. I have no idea how this slipped passed me because I brush and floss daily, I just didn't notice it despite all the time I spend in the mirror. I take care of my health. The spot is right where my bottom wisdom tooth used to be, which is basically just scar tissue. That said... I have been practicing self-inquiry and meditation for quite some time. I'm at a point in my journey where it's quite clear that there is no self and that reality is just a bunch of "stuff". I see everything as arisings, coming and going at this point. Nothing lasts, even myself. I am beginning to feel like a more advanced practitioner, but please don't mistake this for arrogance. Whatever this is, it may take me out. I am ready to die, but before I do, I want to know myself. I have decided that 5-MeO is probably the best route for me to go. Unfortunately, I live in the US and the substance isn't very accessible. I wish I lived in Canada. For those of you that have tried a ceremony, I am looking for advice. I don't care if the substance is Bufo or synthetic, however, I would prefer synthetic. Where can I go, and who can I trust for an epic 5-MeO ceremony? It is time, I just want to know the truth.

I disagree with the premise of this thread, that you should alter your state of mind to meditate better. Meditation is about seeing things AS THEY ARE, regardless of condition or content.

You are afraid because you don't have the skills. Get a book or two on assertiveness written by a reputable source.