WelcometoReality

@Nadosa if possible do several 20 minutes meditation sessions through out the day. When you start feeling like you are going unconscious do some meditation to ground yourself. It might be hard to do depending on work etc. Look into some mindfulness exercises that can be done at any time.

@cetus56 You have? I'd never dare that. And why complicate things?

@cetus56 Maybe a 2 week dark room retreat?

@Principium Nexus Yes, I experience the same thing. It started with distant sounds like a far away train feeling like it happened inside me. It developed later to all sound and then sight. I think you are right. Less identification with the body makes it appear like that.

Yeah it can be illusiory if it is done to get somewhere. True practice gets you closer to right now. Closing the gap as they say.. I'd ransack myself to see what intentions are there. Or maybe these doubts of yours bubble up because your practice is working and ego is feeling threatened?

@Voyager @cetus56 This post also has some great information on this topic.

You're not making up a concept. That's the real deal. Something observing something else is separation. Reality has no boundries, it is one, so if there is experience of separation that is still not the truth.

You think it's understanding what's happening that will get you out of it but it's letting go of that which want to know and want to get out of it that will get you out of it. In other words let yourself be stuck in it. Allow yourself to be completely lost. Don't try to fight it or get out of it. Experience it fully. It can't hurt that which you truly are.

Is there seem any distance between the observer and the observed?

This is ego separating itself from parts of itself. Is the observing state a "doing"? Is there something favoring this observing state from any other state?

Yes it's easy to have these wonderful open moments to experience. First of all recognize that that is what's going on. That your mind is spewing out these thoughts. Why is it doing that? Hint: Past conditioning. It's been taught to spew it out. Don't hate it for that, it is just doing what it's been programmed to do. Now when you recognize that is what's going on you don't need to listen to it. I advice you not to. Do something that takes your attention of your mind and into reality. Meaning your senses. Workout, go for a walk, do the dishes any physical activity. And when the mind has stopped spewing give yourself a good pat on the back for doing the activity and breaking the cycle of negative thoughts, say it out loud. Good work! The last part is important to do even if it might feel silly to. But it only feels silly because your mind has been taught not to give itself credit. To not accept compliments. So give it some time to adjust to this new way.

Do you want to know what the truth is or do you want to believe what others are saying? If it's the later then that's fine, you can just continue with your life as usual. Nothing wrong with that because it's all one, even being stuck in illusion.

Do you really know that? It's not as much something you do, it's more a giving up the knowing. You see it's futility. You can't know anything and you can't do anything and you surrender to that. Or more accurately surrender happens when the gift of not knowing is presented to you.

This YOU that you talk about.. What would you call yourself? What is experiencing? Is there any distance between the thing you are experiencing and yourself? You say that it starts to exist out of nowhere but where is this nowhere?

@Thisisit I've had social anxiety and depression from my mid teen years mid twenties. Great that you have taken your first steps toward resolving your problems. The recipe for success is rather simple but also very hard to do. That is facing your fears, go out in public, have conversations with people. Feel awkward and judged. Do this daily and in a way that triggers light to moderate amounts of fear and anxiety. Make sure to reward yourself for the effort you put into this. You can message me if you have any questions or just want to talk to someone whos been in your situation. Cheers

Confusion is good because it shows that you are open for truth. Embrace the confusion instead of searching for answers because what is it that wants to know? Just let the fear of not knowing and the confusion be, they are not problems you need to fix.

It's only frightening if you think about it isn't it? Yes be in that state always and see what happens imo.

@faith That's a great question to contemplate! Can you actually do it?

@How to be wise The ego will be trancended at first so that will not matter, but before it is trancended wouldn't you rather have high self esteem than low self esteem?

@Mert The love is always there. You just need to listen. This is where the mind wants to ask "how do I listen?". But it can never listen. All it does is produce noise and one always listen to that noise because it is the loudest. I started to listen to bhajans which a menber here posted to me. The mind was really critical to that "cult like" expression of love but it really did wonders to me.

@Not a shaolin monk You are free to do anything you want!!! And it's all predetermined...

@Joseph Maynor the thoughts come and go as they please. No need to stop them, just don't believe them. See them as a dvd with a movie on it. The dvd is there, it is real. The content, the movie, of the dvd is not real.

@Emre Observing something is distancing yourself from it. It's me over here observing something over there. It's separation. So observing is not the end goal. It's a step toward not identifying with thoughts and feelings but there is more.

Careful. Mind really likes to grasp these experiences and create stories around them. Best to see them for what they are. A story. It's all new to you so of course it is frightening, no need to worry. You will get accostumed to it eventually. And about the "forgetting" part. It's good to have daily meditation practice to "ground" yourself in 'being'. Preferebly in the morning. 20 minutes or so is enough. The pendulum between the personal state and the non-personal state is totally normal. Just let it happen.

Like @eputkonen said, the ego is thought so it can't create another thought. There might be thought patterns though. These can be spotted by setting up a mindfullness practice noting the thought and feeling sensations. Also if the senses and thoughts are all we experience what is an emotion like sadness?