WelcometoReality

I have a mobile phone in the left front pocket on my jeans. What's the effects?

That was awesome! Thank you sincerly from the bottom of my heart. ❤

@cetus56 There been 2 major realizations that has altered experience. First there was a recognition of being consciousness and not the person. Still alot of identity left with being consciosness and there was still being consciosness looking out from the body. The second realization smashed the boundries of inside and outside. There was one. Alot of identity was removed during the realization and has been falling away ever since. But there is still identity left to fall away. Even if there is still identity left the experience is still being nothing amd everything. Am I making sense?

That's the experience. No separate I that is having the experience.. just alot of fear arising and resistances to the fear. I don't know what the reactions would be. Probably fear and resistance. Yes I can see that there still is ego here. I'm not saying that there's been total ego death.

Thank you! I don't have a sense of being in a fixed location. No boundries. Just space and everything in it (which is the space). What does come up is an emotional separation that is like a knot in the stomach. That's what is causing separation in the form of a no to experience.

I know what's going to happen. I'm going to die, but I'm not addicted. ?

A fascination for what's true.

You don't think the way is watching tv series and playing video games?

I haven't noticed that.

Thanks. I'll just die first and then you can welcome me for real. I don't believe you. Now tell me the secret!?! ? If you only knew.. oh right you do know. ?

That's the funny thing. It's not the resistance that's feeding it like it has been with other negative feelings. It seems like the resistance to it makes it stop. Or maybe I'm deluding myself.

When the fear comes up I surrender to it. Allow it to be. It gradually gets stronger and stronger. The heartbeat raises with it. I continue to surrender then at some point it gets so strong it feels like I'm going to die. I start to resist and then it disappears.

@John Lula thx. I'll contemplate them this evening. @Robi Steel I hope braveness arises next time it happens. @Matt8800 mm I can see that it could open up life in a whole new way. I know I'll have to face it sometime. No one gets out of this alive. You make it sound easy. What's the secret?

I thought I had overcome it but apparently not. I have to know the truth. I don't really know why but it's been a burning desire for quite some time. But for now.. tv series and video games... I want an upgrade with missile launchers on my forearm. Yes this is definetly the real deal. Big contraction in the gut/upper groin area. I never thought I'd be this scared when facing death.

When I watch series or play video games the fear doesn't come up so I do those thing intentionally to distract myself.

@Truth Addict Thank you for those beautiful words. @cetus56 Yeah I guess these experiences are great for priming my DMN. Final liberation?

After the realization there has been a deepening of it. An embodyment of the realization. The ego continues but slowly fades away. I can see that it's becoming more and more subtle but it's still there. It has many similarities to panic attacks. I feel like I'm in a very stable emotional balance. I have no stress or control issues which makes me think that it's not panic attacks.

Have you ever had fear arise when there is a sudden loud noise?

I've had thought-based fears before and it's not of that nature. This comes from the stomach-groin area.

@Natasha @Anna1 @cetus56

This is not a thought induced fear, it's more primal than that.

But that's what brought me here.

No. I have already realized what I truly am. I can't say it's a fear that is related to anything specific other than a fear of death. It can come up when I'm working, trying to sleep or taking a shit. It seems to relate to my intuition somehow. I'm running from it and I can't seem to face that fear at all even if I want to.

@Peter124 I haven't reached full enlightenment but as the awakening goes deeper and deeper the voice, ego thinking, comes up less and less. You won't lose the ability to use your mind as a tool.

The goal to stop thought come from thought itself. Awareness has no goal to end any experience. It is open to any experience and also doesn't cling to any of it. If you try to stop thought it will only lead to more thoughts.