WelcometoReality

Should and shouldn't comes from the conditioned mind. If you think that you shouldn't be staying up late you can inquire into the thought like this. 1. "I shouldn't be staying up late" 2. Is this true? Why shouldn't I stay up late? 3. Because I should go up early and I'll be tired if I stay up all night. 4. Question those statements. Are they true? 5. Do I need to go up early? 6. Yes I have work tomorrow. 7. Is there something wrong with being tired? 8. No, but I don't like being tired at work. I don't perform as well when I'm tired. 9. So if I dont want to be tired at work I also want to go to bed early. Just an example but you conclude what you want rather than what you should or shouldn't do.

Being arises from non-being. So being is experienced and non-being is a non-experience. I am can also be identified with but yes I agree that it's good to be on the lookout for any identification.

@playdoh I would say that how you speak is a reflection of the the world you've already created (your beliefs). "Is it bad to talk about other people?" If you believed that you wouldn't talk about other people or you would feel guilty when talking about other people. "Is it good to talk about other people?" Maybe it's not good or bad? Maybe the more relevant question is what you're saying about these people true or is it distorted by your beliefs about them.

Yeah, that's the meaning of the word so logically you're correct. Experientially it means being aware of the nothing in which every "thing" is arising. Personally I wouldn't say that "nothing is happening" but everything is happening within stillness/nothing. Something is opposed to nothing until it's realized that something isn't opposed to nothing but the same thing. Nothing is always present but yes it does not exist. Rather it is that which make it possible for existence to exist.

She's talking from a state of self-love and from that state it's easy to self-love. ? She doesn't talk about how to get there which can be triggering. If you're in a state of self-hatred you can't just snap your fingers and suddenly switch your state. What you can do is ask yourself what's keeping you from loving yourself? Meet it and question if it's actually true.

I still went to work during that time. You don't have to let your life fall completely apart. ?

Then it impossible to define it as a thing. Yeah, what is it then? It can only be sensed or non-sensed directly. ?

Yes desire and struggle seem to be closely linked. Struggle to get a certain object or to achieve something that you desire. Do you struggle to breath or getting water and food from the refrigerator? Or even struggle to go to work? Some things one do is effortless. I would even say that most things are effortless but maybe that's based of how I function now. I have definitely struggled alot in the past. Fighting as defend myself? Yes if that's what is needed. Fight to get somewhere and achieve things? No, there is no struggle without desires. The ability to push yourself disappears. It's all happening effortlessly and genuinely. Learning can be effortless as well. I love to learn. Read books. Learn to paint, woodworking, brew beer. But I do it because that's what I like to do not because I need to learn it in order to achieve something. Don't get me wrong, Desire is great to achieve big things. Where would Elon Musk be without desire? Maybe work at walmart. Or maybe the universe would have some other great plan for him, who knows. My guess is that he would be happier without desires.

To me it seems like that wasn't the case. You can't know what happens once you let of desires. Life moves on it's own but there might not be much going for a while. It sorta falls apart only to fall together again. Nothing extraordinary but it's beautiful.

?? Seems like desire falls away after awakening has happened and then one's content with being. Doing the small things. Living an ordinary life. It's beautiful thing. There is no way to get rid of desire only to see that they don't lead to happiness. Happiness is already here underneath the desire.

@Phoenix11 Yes, being aware of the present moment is important for anyone on the path imo. ?

Yes it seems like all interpretations of experiences are just that. What is it that wants to label the interpretation "accurate" or "not accurate". Isn't that more interpretation? Is there actually an accurate way to interpret?

You let the feelings be just as they are and you feel them fully. It's not a complex process but it can be hard to feel 'negative' feelings' fully as the body is conditioned to do something about them. Yeah, it's totally normal to forget and identify with the feelings to get some sort of release. Just recognize that it has happened and start letting go again. The more you do this the easier it will become.

@Someone here Very nice. ? Could you explain what you mean by this?

That's good work. You're observing your own experience and making your own conclusions based on it. It's also good to not believe anyone else dogmatically but also be open to the possibilty that there's more to it than how you're currently experiencing it. When you meditate can you observe your thoughts and feelings, seeing them come and go?

Yes, desire seem to have a "feeling of lack" component to it. Do you feel this lack because you desire or do you desire because you feel lack? Well do you ever become truly satisfied once you achieved your goals? To me it seems like the satisfaction is short lived and you start setting new goals to achieve. Detach from outcome is to detach from your desire which in turn is to let go of the feeling of lack/anxiety. Does the anxiety serve you? What if you could still do whatever you do to make a profit without feeling anxious?

?

Beautiful. There was actually tears in my eyes while reading it. ? Dying into this. It's such a beautiful thing once you can let it happen.

Here's a worksheet to deal with these types of situations. https://thework.com/resources/ Download and write down your answers. It's for the part in you that feels hurt, angry and saddened by your fathers behaviour. Once it has been allowed to come up and felt it will be easier to release it. Hope it helps. ?

If that's what you believe then yeah you should stay. Is there also a belief that they shouldn't make fun of you and if so is it true?

Truth likes to give a good slapping every now and then. ? Has there been something "falling away" after the realization happened?

I don't know. I'd be honest about my feelings and if they wouldn't care I'd seriously consider if I want them in my life or not. So you believe you're in debt to him because of it. Is that actually true? Yes it will.

Yeah it's funny isn't it? ? Or very fearful when it's realized. ? At least it was for me. ?

If you don't like that they are doing it then it's probably best to tell them that you don't like it. We can only theorize about what he/she would do. My guess is that that person would leave such circumstances and find a better one to live his or hers life. Just focusing on "I do not exist" is spiritual bypassing, it surpresses feelings. The better thing to do is to see what thought and feeling that come up when these situations come up. Then start to question those thought, are they actually true? Allow the feelings to come up fully and feel them.

Yeah, there wasn't even a puzzle there to begin with. ? Yeah, it all falls away until nothing is opposed to truth.