Water by the River

Don't worry, the Filibusters will be back when required. People who are too serious probably take also the dream too serious. It needs a balance between full engagement and the lightness of the realization of the dreamlike nature of all appearances & worlds. Sometimes Solipsism-aficionados tend to take it all a bit serious... Who or what is all possible shows again? Who or what is trying to convince who or what of Solipsism? If that ain't a cosmic joke delivered by Maya herself I don't know what is. Smiling with Snoopey & Charlie Brown by the River “TRANSCENDENCE RESTORES HUMOR. Spirit restores humor. Suddenly smiling returns. Too many representatives of too many movements – even many very good movements, such as feminism, environmentalism, meditation, spiritual studies [Solipsism, SWbtR] – seem to lack humor altogether. In other words, they lack lightness, they lack a distance from themselves, a distance from the ego and its grim game of forcing others to conform to its contours... They should all trade two pounds of ego for one ounce of laughter”(Ken Wilber. 1999. One Taste: The Journals of Ken Wilber. December 7).

Relaxing & retired with Snoopy by the River

Sitting with Snoopy & Charlie Brown by the River

I know. Good god, now I will not get your lovely nonviolent metaphor out my system for a looong time, everytime I will look at a screwdriver. Razard had certain Awakenings that he probably will continue to interpret and express in his own ways. Everbody can judge for himself how holistic, logical and coherent and loving that ends up. I personally would "unpack" or interpret these awakenings a bit more carefully, more impersonal, more like Indras Net, but who am I to spoil or judge the gig. I am quite happy that you do the debating, then I don't have to . Been there, dont that, and of course less than successful. But there is for sure development to be seen in his content & style of writing, less ego and such, so thumbs up & bon voyage! Besides, talking/writing to "others" trying to convince them of "Absolute" Solipsism is the ultimate joke. Whats the point, besides hallucinating & falling for a very serious & determined "convincer"-illusion? So chapeau to all appearing actors in the mighty River, of the mighty River, for the mighty River. PS: All of ya don't exist, only I do. Whadda say? Answer: Not today darling...

Actualized Quotes '094: "God, Truth, Consciousness, Love cannot be defined because they are everything - Totality." "But the totality of existence has nothing against which it can be defined". "If you could define God, it wouldn't be God". "The technical answer is: Consciousness is Undefined". "Being undefined is what makes Consciousness divine". Very good! Especially something for the Absolute Solipsism Aficionados, which are still banging their heads against the conceptual walls hiding the above mentioned undefineable (but realizeable) nonconceptual Absolute Truth. Admittedly, not exactly a new insight. A guy called Nagarjuna had the exact same realizations, which resulted in Mahayana Buddhism and the Middle Way: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madhyamaka "Its character is neither existent, nor nonexistent, / Nor both existent and nonexistent, nor neither. / Centrists should know true reality / That is free from these four possibilities." But definitely correct. And everbody having had Full Enlightenment of course also had that realization, by definition. So then, ladies and gentlemen, how can consciousness be higher or lower, especially considering Awakening n+1, if "being undefined is what makes Consciousness divine"? Of course, it can't, only the "outer" appearances or the "inner" appearance of understanding (understander/separate-self-illusion) can be "higher or lower". Which, after having understood what Infinite Reality and ones True Being truly is, is only relative appearance, happening within ones Infinite Being. And that appearance (or if one is inclined to call that [higher/lower] consciousness/Awakening/whatever, which is a slippery slope, because see the "undefineablity" mentioned by Leo above) can be "higher" or "lower". True Being/Infinite Consciousness, which never appeared, changed, disappeared/disappears (nor could) but IS and only can be right here right now, covered normally by lots of ignorant and illusory concepts and feelings of separation and duality. That what every being truly is is never changed by anything, any realization, understanding, Awakening n+1 or whatever. "IT" has change and appearance ("external" world and "internal" "mindstream") and understanding/understander and Awakening/Awakener APPEARING WITHIN ITSELF. "Itself", which has no outside, hence infinite. But once one has truly realized ones own non-conceptual always already here Infinite Reality, its game over on the Absolute Side, and continuing game on on the relative side of appearance. Which, btw., never truly touches ones True Being, which remains eternally unchanging silent (potentially) aware Infinite Reality. Which is exactly this undefinable unchanging silent undefinable Infinite Absolute Opening of Reality that Leo is talking about. Stabilizing the access to this Realization in daily life is the Summum Bonum, not the rock-gig: But the rock thing is of course also fun. Until it isn't. Who is telling these little conceptual stories to other perspectives of his/hers/its True Infinite Being by the River?

Koan: Who or what again is having these minor conceptual disagreements appearing within "it"self? Smiling at overflowing cups by the River

Instead of Indras Net as a metaphor of the One without a second looking through the eyes of all appearing beings (which is actually what all spiritual traditions say), gently embracing the Infinite Totality of Infinite Being in its infinite nature imagining infinite perspectives/beings/Holons, we get something served more like: As gentle as one agent Smith is to the other: Indras Net my friend, not "When you play the character [is] the entirety of the frame is all that exists". https://www.actualized.org/forum/search/?&q=Indras Net&author=Water by the River Selling "me too" by the River

Exactly. Which is the last thing any separate ego wants... A little less conversation, a little more action, please All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me A little more bite and a little less bark A little less fight and a little more spark meditation ... Come on, baby, I'm tired of talking Grab your coat and let's start walking Come on, come on (come on, come on) Come on, come on (come on, come on) Come on, come on (come on, come on)

Who could disagree?

Welcome back, and good that you are well. You seem to have had quite an interesting ride lately. One doesn't need a psychotic break for realization by the way, and if one is not so inclined, better avoids risking or having one.... I assume the food in the places where one ends up after having psychotic breaks can be a bit questionable?

Very good, Not to you specifically, but to the Ego=God solipsist aficinonados: "And God said: Thou shalt not be able to see my face; for no man shall see my face, and live." - Exodus 33:20 "Do not rely on any other remedy. Have I not already quoted to you: “Find the subject which casts the shadows, it is the very source of all Buddhas”? Your Buddha-nature is like the jewel-sword of the Vajara king: whoever touches it is killed. Or is it like a massive, raging fire: everything within reach loses its life. Once you realize your True-nature, all evil bent of mind arising from karma extending over innumerable years past is instantly annihilated, like snow put into a roaring furnace. No thought of Buddha or Truth remains. ... If you push forward with your last ounce of strength at the very point where the path of your thinking has been blocked, and then, completely stymied, leap with hands high in the air into the tremendous abyss of fire confronting you—into the ever-burning flame of your own primordial nature—all ego-consciousness, all delusive feelings and thoughts and perceptions will perish with your ego-root and the true source of your Self-nature will appear. You will feel resurrected, all sickness having completely vanished, and will experience genuine peace and joy. You will be entirely free" - Bassui, in: Kapleau, Three Pillars of Zen YOU are indeed alone. Luckily, there is no separate"you/I" anywhere. Solipsism is just a illusionary thought-concept arising IN Infinite boundless You. Arising like mist, disappearing like mist, temporary, a dream, a illusion, a mirage in a dream. Where was it before your parents were born? Koan: Who is thinking for about Solipsism again? What is the dreamer and the dream again? Selling "I am eternally absolutely all alone, but luckily that is no problem since there is no small separte I-anything (nor ever was, besides an illusion-arising) but only the Infinite (River)" t-shirts by the River

Your questions are Koans. Only Full Enlightenment will answer them. That will become clear once you wake up. Some pointers: You are not the "I AM". That perceiver-illusion ("I am") is an illusion arising within the Real You, Infinite Reality itself, before which the states (of waking, dreaming or deep sleep, as human, or as animal with no "I Am", or ET, and ETs n+1) "roll" before. That "I am", or the perceiver, or awareness of awareness, is the last illusion before "the" Totality realizes itself. Real You HAS to be constant. Who would witness Real You popping into existence if it was not constant? Right, Real You, Infinite Reality/Consciousness. And same with the (imagined) dis-appearance of you, or "death". Anything changing is just a modulation of your own Infinite Being, but not YOU. And in Deep Sleep, no I am, no (self-) consciousness (only the potential for sentience if something arises again) is arising. So "I am" is not Real You. Just the first illusion. https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=prior+to+consciousness Really understanding/realizing that is (final) Enlightenment, and a deep deep Identity shift or loss of illusion. Can't get more infinite than infinite. Only be aware of different n+1 arisings. So what is that Reality that sees, hears and understands? Who or what is reading and understanding these lines right now? Good news: YOU are always here, never not here, already eternal and immortal. Bad news: Its not "I am". Since YOU are (also) looking through the eyes of an ant, and that ant doesn't have self-consciousness (or any feeling/arising of "I am") , that I am is already too much self-consciousness, and not just awareness (which can also be mere perception perceiving itself, or potentially unaware of nothing arises, but with the potential for sentience). But there is also no Awareness besides perceptions perceiving itself. Making "Awareness" a noun is already a mistake. And what is trying to wake up, only to realize while doing so that it was always awake/aware/right here right now? What is seeing these lines right now? What is "the" Infinite Totality/Being, perceiving itself, cosplaying to be separate and lost and trying to realize something? What is that Being which has to check every false identity, including the "one" who tries to wake, only then to see it has always been itself, believing its own illusion-arisings, including "I am"? What is "I am" if there is only INFINITE YOU, and nothing else could ever be? A pointer pointing to an arising (apparently separate) illusion within yourself... But before Infinite Being realizes itself, it has to be fast enough to spot all these illusions arising real-time within itself. Aka as meditation mastery to not get hypnotized by the illusion-arisings. And much more precise than all this pointing above: What was your face before your parents were born. There is a totally clear answer for that, and its right here. Once that "answer" is always accessible or obvious, life becomes playful. Koan: Who is (not) Selling Water by the River? PS: How to get "there" in the waking state: Some quotes: "Cluster of Sensations taking ownership or thinking being in control of other sensations" "Awareness of awareness is just more sensations no different from objects of awareness" "Actually the final path is all about dissolving any sense of “awareness” apart from object or phenomenons" "SNEAKING UP CLUSTERS OF FEELING OF BEING IN CONTROL-You sneak up on any cluster of sensation that feels like it's in control, of another cluster of sensation, then you sneak up on THAT which is doing the sneaking" "You keep going meta until the circuit closes on itself and there's no more duality between the subject and object" "No cluster of sensation “takes credit”, “owns”, “grasp”, “perceives”, “interferes” with any other sensation because any sense of entanglement is still a form of clinging" "Eliminate the “arrow of attention”, or “Awareness/Consciousness” as a stand alone substrate/Truth because even “Aware of awareness” still presupposes a very subtle sense of self who is trying to pay attention" "Actually the final path is all about dissolving any sense of “awareness” apart from object or phenomenons" QUICKNESS ATTENTION TO CLOSE LOOP CLUSTERS. Stay ahead of THAT sensation and ad infinite until you close the loop_ for that you got to be QUICK with attention "Awareness of awareness is just more sensations no different from objects of awareness" That is how it works in practice on the final stages towards Enlightenment Some quotes: "my last the last epiphany that I had was there's no one here to be enlightened and then that last speck of solidity was gone" " there's no one here do be enlightened the ego never expressed anything it's all just cause and effect of the universe there was no never anybody here since the beginning" "No more delay, after getting faster and faster, NO MORE DELAY BETWEEN MEDITATOR AND OBJECT, JUST ONE SENSE DOOR OF SENSATIONS PERCEIVING THEMSELVES" "then you do that faster and faster and more efficiently efficiently until there's gonna be a point where everything just syncs up into one it's"

At work, at rest, never stop trying to realize who it is that hears. Even though your questioning penetrates the unconscious, you won‘t find the one who hears, and all your efforts will come to naught. Yet sounds can be heard, so question yourself to an even profounder level. At last every vestige of self-awareness will disappear and you will feel like a cloudless sky. Within yourself you will find no “I,” nor will you discover anyone who hears. This Mind is like the void, yet it hasn‘t a single spot that can be called empty. Do not mistake this state for Self-realization, but continue to ask yourself even more intensely, “Now who is it that hears?” If you bore and bore into this question, oblivious to anything else, even this feeling of voidness will vanish and you won’t be aware of anything—total darkness will prevail. [Don’t stop here, but] keep asking with all your strength, “What is it that hears?” Only when you have completely exhausted the questioning will the question burst; now you will feel like someone who has come back from the dead. This is true realization. You will see the Buddhas of all the universes face-to-face and the Dharma Ancestors past and present. Bassui Kapleau, Three Pillars of Zen

Good good. To whom does the perceiver arise? Who or what is still there when the perceiver does not arise, such as before birth, in deep sleep, or after death? THAT is the True You, before which all states, lifes, beings, humans & ETs and realms appear and "roll through". Never being more than a temporary transparent mirage. Not real. THAT on the other side is real. The only actual (non-) "thing" that is real. So what is THAT? Mumbling Koans by the River & letting the Keisaku swim downsteam & smiling at dream-mirage-crocodiles and their dream-dinner frolicking in the Infinite River

Good good. There is only True You. No us. No Water by the River. No Xonas Pitfall. No God, Gods, Infinity of whatever and what not, besides that which eternally IS. Find out what that is. Or daddy & Leos crocodiles gotta spank & bite

Who or what is truly having all these conceptual ideas again? Sure that there really is an "us", a "he", "a" "God", "Gods"? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keisaku ?

There is no "it" or "the". Impersonal it is... Yet, "it" is YOU. True You. Reality. Infinite Being. And yet in "that" Reality, there are many directors of the orchestra. As many as there are realms, and more. Other perspectives of your Infinite Being "containing" (with no outside) and manifesting Indras Net, that you just forget in real time. Reality/manifestation creating and maintaining archetypes/divinities containing whole universes. Holons upon Holons upon Holons, up to Infinity. Chris Bache has some nice descriptions of these reality creating/manifesting archetypes, but you find that in any spiritual traditions ("Divine beings, Gods, Archetypes...") And yet, all of these are also just appearances, mirage, dreams... True You are these realm-manifesting beings/perspectives right now also, and also Leos Aliens, you just forget them... Who is thinking these concepts right now? Who is understanding these words?

The answer in a drama with 9 acts: Act 1: Whats up in town? What is "the" "Absolute" True You doing? It is playing evolution on its appearance-side. Atoms to molecules to basic life to complex life. What is evolution doing on this planet? Racing the Spiral Dynamics ladder upwards, towards transcendence. Chris Baches Diamond Souls. Or: The Fermi Paradoxon. So far, no failure. We are not digging up the remnants of the 27th failed industrial civilization before ours. Think about it, that is pretty strange in itself, isn't it? No complete reset-button-failure so far... And "It" is pretty busy getting somewhere... Although there are no guarantees. Act 2: "Who" pulls the trigger of liberation/Enlightenment when there is no separate-self? What is "granting" or allowing Realization/Enlightenment/insight into True Being to happen? The Totality of Indras Net, infinitely intelligent, birthing, maintaining and destroying the illusion-appearance of this vast universe moment to moment. The Totality of Impersonal True You looking through all beings and holons. What does this Totality of Indras Net (Manifest appearing "God", not the Absolute, but the sum total of manifestation-appearance) want? Liberated beings that have a Boddhisattva-"hangover" or inclination, or liberated "do-nothing-anymores"? Act 3: Love & Compassion: The Big Gate Keeper of sobre Awakened States in daily life So which being stabilizes faster in liberation? The one with the apparent boddhisattva-show-hangover-inclinations, or the ones without? There have been both variants. But my best guess is that the do-nothing-fraction has some lections in this or the next life ahead. And compassion and love is that which stabilizes awakened nondual states in daily life. The big Gate-Keeper. How is that love & compassion & patience possible without going nuts in this sometimes pretty violent kindergarten-stage of humanity? The Boddhisattva-Mindset of course. Act 4: Don't be the stupid grasping egoic Boddhisattva Of course, all of these boddhisattva-inclinations can not be done in a grasping and ego-driven-way, that would kill the awakened states. It has to be done with some humour on the seemlingly winding and paradoxical nature of (human-) evolution, and with total freedom of outcome. How to do that, that is the real trick, and it takes wisdom and experience. If you honestly commit to that path, yours truly believes that the Infinite Intelligence of Reality has a much clearer channel to help with good intuition, intelligence and growing wisdom. And synchronicities. That is at least my experience and deep intuition. Next aspect is: Sat-Chit-Ananda IS love and compassion. Literally. Acting then spontaneously tends to happen in a compassionate and loving way. Act 5: "They are still a young species with much to learn..." Act 6: The Boddhisattva-Mindset driving the way back home after a certain stage, and also stabilizing Awakening. "What´s your take on this? How would then Bodhisattva, which is a concept depending on a not completely developed sense of (TRUE Identity, which is no Identity or everything there is, infinite. WbtR) Identity be the key factor to open gates to higher realms? Wouldn´t that imply the irony that it takes forgetfulness of our Absolute Identity as the motor that keeps manifestation going subtler and subtler?" Of course . Where there is not THIS, there is only fear (Upanishads). That, and some other motivations coming from the illusory separation, drives the bus back home. Act 7: Selling "Even in their darkest days, I have seen goodness in them. I have seen their capacity for compassion, wisdom, courage, honour, love and truth" by the River Rumour has it that some prominent members of this lovely forum are hating humans a bit because its not primarily about truth but survival. That is a classic trap of the dream-illusion. I mean, how would humanity have made it so far without absolute priority on survival? How could it be different? And "who" apparently wanted that game in the first place? Blaming the acorn to not be an oak yet just leads to suffering and non-awakened-states in daily life. Act 8: So... may it be that the non-grasping-Boddhisattva-lifestyle is maybe the nicest way to live this earthly dream-existence? Act 9: Leaving the Boddhisattva-dream-show behind: Who is actually imagining this story of "beings" needing saving by boddhisattvas? Who is looking through all eyes? And what would a "being" having realized that "it" is literally the only being in existence do? Who are you again?

Hunting and killing „Buddhas“ on the road. 🎃🙈 Preferably together with UnbornTao and Leo… … by the River And having done that, chilling in Sat Chit Ananda

👍

Hey Leo, its You. YOU. You that is manifesting all this Buddhism-crap and the Human-crap and I-don't-know-what-other-crap. Because there is only YOU. Real You. Not Leo. Ah, ok, got it. As soon as there is something to dislike, to "crap", to "rat", the separate "Leo"-gig continues a bit longer before it finally dies (or is finally seen as illusion that never really existed) somewhen in the imagined future. The Raison d'être (Raison d'être /ˌreɪzɒ̃ ˈdɛtrə/ is a French expression commonly used in English, meaning "reason for being" or "reason to be.") for the separate self is to dislike parts of its own True Being instead of basking in Sat Chit Ananda. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raison_d'être You already know all of that? Uhum. Yes you do. Then why this auto-immune allergic reactions on your own dream? Ah, only know it part-time? Ok, so must be huge fun the rest of the time . Rodents, Buddhist, Buddhist crap, let's feed em to the crocodiles. Who designed all of that Human biased and untruthful "crap" again? And all the crocodiles? And now lets kill all Buddhas and all of Buddhism (seriously, they all must go. There is no Buddha, no Buddhism. Only YOU fooling yourself). Who exactly is reading these words right now? Selling Iconoclasm by the River and killing the Buddha by the river (together with @UnbornTao and Ken) "won't accept any answer expect as your direct awareness of THAT Reality". PS: Ok ok, after so much irresponsible bubble from the Absolute Side of the street: Eat the veggies, do the meditation, brush the teeth, feed the cats. Until it is realized beyond any doubt that all of that has the same reality as last nights dream. And even then, brushing the teeth continues. By itself. "Though the view should be as vast as the sky, keep your conduct as fine as barley flour." - Padmasambhava

Interesting. For those who like it more boring: The Boddhisattva-attitude does a similiar job of opening the gates to certain (and most important) higher realms. And there ain't no stabilized realization without an open heart... That is why in Mahayana-Buddhism and onwards the two things to train in are wisdom (or speed & strength of Awakened Awareness) and compassion/love (open heart). Which Mahayana-Buddhism also postulates as the two main attributes (among others) that the soul learns and which are taken from life to life. Even the chaps hunting Buddhist rodents with shotguns will get that at some point, after having been broken by suffering sufficiently often. Or by wising up, who knows.... Because these two gates of constant nondual realization are guarded by mechanisms of Reality that don't let the "its all human crap" - crew pass.

Why the heck is the drama like it is? A drama in 10 Acts. Act 1: God IS. Infinite Being/Consciousness/Reality IS. Always. Eternal. I am that I am. Nowhere else to go for "It", because It would and is already be there. (True) You can't have an outside. (True) YOU are. I am that I am. The Being speaking to Moses had realized that: "One day he ventured farafield while pasturing his sheep and ended up on the slopes of Mount Horeb, the “Mountain of God.”70 There, as everyone knows, he saw a strange sight: a plant that appeared to have a flame burning in its center, though it was not consumed by the fire. When he drew closer to get a better look at this marvel, he heard the plant call him by name. “I am here,” Moses answered, whereupon the burning plant told him to take off his shoes, “ … for the place on which you stand is holy ground. I am the God of your fathers…” (Figure 30). The god-plant [aka psychedelic plant,WbtR], then told Moses that he had a task for him." Carl Ruck, The Apples of Apollo. Act 2: Any separate-self has as main building block resistance to what is. When you truly empty out your relative arising self (the illusion), boredom gets cut off (its a negative resistance + a conceptual interpretation on top, all of that are appearances happening within Infinite True You). And all the other interpretations and reactions also, and they get replaced by the Sat Chit Ananda bliss of True Being. Which is also just fact. The True Being of God is Sat Chit Ananda. Any resistance and suffering is just the illusion of the ignorant ego. That becomes totally clear when these awakened states have become accessible in a stable way. Act 3: Indras Net, and the One (Infinite) without a second Apparently, other perspectives of YOUR Infinite Net of perspectives/holons/being (Indras Net), which YOU forget in real-time (you need just one more dimension for these other beings you forget in real-time), manifest this whole show (the so called Archetypes (in former times Gods/Deities or Platos Archetypes, nowadays Leos Aliens of various kinds, see Bache, LSD and the Mind of the Universe: Diamonds from Heaven, or the books of Stan Grof). These beings/perspectives have an Intelligence which makes a human appear very limited. Some like to call it alien. Some divine. Some archetypal. Yet, its all True You at the same time. How all of that has to be necessarily ones own True Being is paradoxical from the un-enlightened perspective, yet no problem when "other" falls away in Enlightenment as just a conceptual-arising. Or more precisely, I-feelings and I-thoughts and projecting "other-feeling" and "other-concepts" on "something" arising in ones True Nondual Infinite Being drops away. Act 4: Chris Bache, LSD and the Mind of the Universe: Diamonds from Heaven: “Just to put this into perspective,” I was in a condition of consciousness that might best be described as “ancient.” Surveying what had been unfolding through billions of years of evolution and what would be emerging in humanity’s future, I was not so much in the material domain as in a domain that was responsible for generating material reality. Matter always exists at a specific time, but I was encompassing many time-moments simultaneously and so was stretched across time. The experience carried with it a sense of being “timefilled” or “ancient.” In the middle of this grand tour, it was as if something said, “Just to put this into perspective,” and then the most extraordinary thing happened. The physical universe began to be folded up and put away. It was as simple as that, like one puts away Christmas decorations after the holidays. The physical universe, planets surging with vitality, whole galaxies teeming with life, started to be folded up and slipped into a background of total EMPTINESS. I immediately recognized that this was the Primal Void. I was being shown that matter and time are not ultimately real, that they emerge from and are at every moment sustained by something that is more real, something completely without form. As the universe got smaller with each fold, I could feel billions of life-forms being slipped into the folds of the Void, and a protest rose within me. I did not want to let go of all this exquisitely beautiful form, everything that had been so painstakingly crafted through billions of years of evolution. Indeed, it was my love for the physical universe that seemed to precipitate this extreme lesson—as if to break the spell that physical creation had on me, seen as I had seen it in the broad sweep of its evolutionary glory. My protests changed nothing, however, and the universe’s bursting vitality became fainter with each fold. As the universe continued to shrink, my experience began to shift to what was swallowing it. What had been background was becoming foreground and capturing my attention. It was SILENCE like I had never experienced silence before. It was STILLNESS more still than I had ever known. And most strange of all, I experienced its emergence as a REMEMBERING. I was remembering something that it seemed I had lost contact with billions of years ago. The shock of remembering something so ancient left me stunned. In one second, it completely transformed my sense of what I was. Our memories define the boundaries of our being. In one sudden movement, I was remembering a sea of Infinite Formlessness that was the source of all Form, including my own form, and I knew that this was what “I” at root was. Act 5. Chris Bache,. LSD and the Mind of the Universe: Diamonds from Heaven: Then “God” asked me, “Is it all for nothing? Have we not learned anything? The Jolts of Non-Being Flowing on the energy of the universe, suddenly everything was turned off and then on again. Everything that is, suddenly was not—POW—then was again. This happened repeatedly. The universe kept vanishing. The jolts were the winking out of Being into Non-Being. In the cessation of the universe, all the world’s striving, yearning, and suffering was suddenly thrown into a new perspective. This was the substance of God. The question is not “Why are we doing it?” The question is “Why is God doing it?” Why is God unfolding himself/herself/itself as the universe? What is it for? In this burgeoning of life, God seemed to be knowing himself. “Either it’s this teaming mass of life or it’s this!”—POW—Nothingness. Either the One becoming our infinitely rich universe, or the Void. Then “God” asked me, “Is it all for nothing? Have we not learned anything?” and he turned as if to ponder his failure. This shattered me and I wept. Non-Being and Being were two different modes of God. In the choice of Being, there unfolded the entirety of life as it is, with all its mysteries, pains, and pleasures. It all seemed to be about learning. “Have we not learned anything?” I felt shattered by the vastness of God’s adventure in knowing himself. All the galaxies had continued to turn while I was in hell today. Suns flared into supernovas, and all this was him. Nothing was not him. “Have we not learned anything?” I was silenced. Act 6: Chris Bache, LSD and the Mind of the Universe: Diamonds from Heaven: “Have we not learned anything?” This time it carried overtones of: “Has it not been worthwhile? Has it not been an adventure? Look what would not exist if we had not chosen to create.” This mysterious progression repeated itself many times and in many variations. It continued for hours. I would be at one level of reality far beyond physical diversity, and as I sought to know this reality more deeply, I would experience a kind of dying, a falling away, and would slip into a new level where I would discover that this duality too was but another facet of Myself. Over and over again, in detailed progressions, I was led to the same fundamental encounter. No matter how many times I died or how many different forms I was when I died, I kept being caught by this massive SOMETHING, this IT. I could not leave IT, could not escape IT, could not not be IT. No matter how many adventures I had been on, I had never stepped outside IT, never stopped being IT. There simply was no outside to My Being. There was no other in existence. As I moved into these levels of increasing ontological simplicity, I entered a profound stillness that reawakened a distant, vague memory. “Where have I known this before?” By following this stillness, I was guided back to what seemed like a time before creation, back to the ontological fount of creation. In this stillness, I was “with Myself” in ways that I had been long ago, but not for billions of years. It was a time of reunion, a time of being whole after a terribly long separation. From this extraordinary position, I began to actually be able to conceive of the possibility of the physical universe not having been created. The alternatives stood starkly before me. On one side was all the planning, all the work, all the confusion and uncertainty, and especially all the terrible suffering that was so fresh in my mind from earlier in the session. On the other side was the profound stillness and richness that was my current state. Why do it? Why manifest the universe if at such a cost? An answer rose that was the same as I had been given before, in session 15: “Have we not learned anything?” This time it carried overtones of: “Has it not been worthwhile? Has it not been an adventure? Look what would not exist if we had not chosen to create.” This time I was not shattered, for the choice of creation seemed profoundly good. The thought that the entire physical universe might not have existed carried with it a terrible sadness. From this perspective, I was also able to feel that there was no fundamental flaw in the manifest order of creation. Despite all the suffering, everything was moving along fine—though it is profoundly unfinished. I continued to ask my questions: “What is happening here?” “How does this work?” “What has it been like for you?” With each question, my experiential field changed, opening me to one cosmic process after another. I cannot describe these experiences adequately because the categories of thought derived from space-time do not lend themselves to remembering clearly or translating into words experiences of realities that lie outside space-time. Though my ordinary waking consciousness is being gradually changed by these experiences, it is still too cognitively restricted to be able to hold on to them in sufficient detail. What I experienced, however, repeatedly swept me into ecstasy. “Amazing!” “So that’s how that works!” “Oh, goodness!” “How much do you want to see?” I was asked. “More!” I answered, and always more would unfold. It kept unfolding for hours. Act 7: Chris Bache, LSD and the Mind of the Universe: Diamonds from Heaven: “Go and create, My Children.” Let me backtrack to another layer of the experience. As I was re-assimilating my lives and ascending through various levels, I was also entering into intimate dialogue with a Presence that addressed me. It communed with me and “spoke” to me in messages that were only sometimes put into words. It was explaining to me what I was experiencing not so much with words but with direct illumination. When I reached the point of Diamond Light, I was lifted beyond physical existence and beyond the bardo echoes of physical existence. It felt like I had reassimilated all my incarnations on Earth, that I had brought back into one all my experiences in duality. From this point, which carried the flavor of both before and after physical existence, the Presence illumined for me the human project. With the deepest, most tender words of a divine parent, It said: “Go and create, My Children.” It was setting us loose in a cosmos that contained many realms. The one I had just reemerged from was only one among many universes, some of which were physical, others not. We were small aspects of this Being, truly Its children, of the same type, only smaller in size and capacity. Act 8. Water by the River sits in Sat Chit Ananda on a park bench, relaxes the self-contraction of his former character-gig into Infinite Liberation of True Being, looking at all beings who believe in their separation and whose suffering and resistance keeps the whole gig going. He remembers quoting from Chris Baches incredible journey told in "LSD and the Mind of the Universe: Diamonds from Heaven", and how he had to pass the Ocean of Suffering on his high-dose-LSD-journey before any of these higher realms which detailed the Karmic mechanisms and the reasons for manifestation (even if it means initial suffering) were disclosed for him. This time, however, I was refusing to surrender to the pain and rejected everything that was happening to me. Eventually, I was backed up against a psychological wall and was told that if I persisted in rejecting the suffering, I would be turning my back on humanity, on life itself. To not care seemed to be the ultimate existential withdrawal from life. With multiple scenarios echoing this refrain, I was being confronted with an absolute choice of whether to open to this pain or not. At this point, my “No” changed to a “Yes.” This transition felt like a conversion in the deepest religious sense. In the middle of terrible suffering I found myself saying, “Yes! I can make a difference. Yes! I accept responsibility.” I was accepting responsibility for the anguish and for trying to make a difference in the lives surrounding me. This shift was fundamental. It reached to depths I cannot now fathom and impacted me in ways I cannot summarize. It seemed a free choice on the most basic of questions. With this acceptance, the torment suddenly changed to positive themes. Themes of young children—happy excitement, delighted play, self-abandoned joy. Many scenarios of childhood wonder and adventure. This was the beginning of a “new way.” It contrasted with the former negative way in every respect. It was simple instead of chaotic, shared instead of individual, fresh instead of repetitive. I felt cleansed and made new. (S 17) Apparently, the high-dose LSD psychedelic journey seemed to demand something like a Bodhisattva-Comittment in order to open these divine-realms and the mechanics of archetypal creation-realms, Karma & reincarnation, which apparently don't get opened so much (if at all) with other psychedelic like 5-MeO. Maybe God has left some safety-elements in place so that Liberation from the egoic separate-self-contraction can not so easily be achieved if it all is done only for the separate-self gig and its curiosity in "understanding". Act 9: Where there is not THIS, there is only suffering Act 10: Harada-Roshi to Yaeoko, in Three Pillars of Zen, Kapleau: Now for the first time. "Now for the first time you have found the Way—fully realized your Mind. You have been delivered from delusion, which has no abiding root. Wonderful! Wonderful! There is neither Ox [God/Reality as object out there]nor man [separate self]." So who exactly is reading these words again? Who is reading these lines? Which is that silent Awareness having it all appearing in its Infinite and eternal Being? And did it all ever truly happen? And who said to Chris Bache “Go and create, My Children”? Selling the drama by the River

Where else? Please allow me to introduce myself…

How do you want to pull this off when True You is already Infinity, the whole shebang? just askin…