Lucasxp64

Those family disputes are so energy draining. My mother literally tells me she wants to kill me with a knife, and I can't speak of what she truly is out loud when I do sometimes: A vengeful old person full of inner built up hate. Fortunately I know she isn't so deranged, she only ever once pointed a knife at me which I neutralized immediately. But be careful with crazy family members, if it gets too heated get the heck away temporarily, go take a walk.

She feels to me the female version of Rupert Spira. Nice soothing southern american accent.

I just talk away for hours like talking to a friend in private audios, then I dump the last week or so of audios it to an AI like notebookLM and ask it questions. I use Syncthing on my phone to Sync to my computer, so it's easier to dump it there. I talk to myself in those recordings, extremely unstructured rambles, I try to dump as many of my insights as possible. Sometimes I pick my phone at random during the day and I speak away my insights, my worries, concerns, solutions to my problems, etc. So I can always pick it up later by asking this AI about what I spoke about.

I think this can also even be a workflow for creating things. Most of the times my best ideas and insights comes from being in the flow of talking four several minutes, a lot of it will be pure repetitive ramble where you end up saying the same thing but slightly differently, but then at some point, it just clicks. The key point here, is that it just FEELS DIFFERENT TO TALK, than to write. Doing journaling by writing feels more dry, when I speak I'm able to be much more emotional and there is a certain energy. It also makes me feel better, I pretty much do that even when I'm feeling alone and I don't wanna dump to somebody all of my quirky specific problems, I just speak into the mic, or I make long pauses of several minutes to think deeply, with no pressure to respond to somebody at the other end, or getting my train of thought disrupted by some real time voice AI or a person on the other end. (just regular audio, none of that tap-to-talk bullshit specific AI interfaces will use, that makes me feel anxious).

Applied Intelligence is definitely the most important for success, pretty obvious.

Types of intelligence by Serge Faguet (He is a very goal-oriented entrepreneur, so he sought to improve those types in himself):

It's so funny to see the philosopher's conclusions to be basically a mirror of their personal lives. Like, Jordan Peterson is a good example. He is a guy with so much of that pent-up moralistic rage energy. And it translates so well with the ideas he is most enamorated about. Gabor Maté is right about him.

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I think high quality men and women is definitely a murky terminology, that brings the halo effect into it, or the opposite of halo effect. And people get all mentally confused. But I think in general the regular talk you can do that is politically correct of good men and woman is ETHICS/MORAL (How ethically Good are they as a person, a citizen, a father figure, a figure in their community, etc.). It doesn't include attractiveness, attractiveness or lack of it is generally politically incorrect to talk about. --- Like, I had some neurosis some time ago, and I had this weird thought experiment: Some girl that I loved, FELT TO ME, too attractive for me (I was having some low self-esteem thoughts), and thought that I had to tell her she was too beautiful for a guy like me... But what would she do? She was in love with me. Would she just introduce me to one of her less attractive friends? 😂 "Hey darling... So I know you love me, but you're too high value for a low value (average looking and broke) guy like me. I think I need to be with a lower value, less attractive woman instead. Maybe you introduce me to an ugly friend of yours, or maybe I wait until you gain a lot of weight or until you're old as heck" If I told this to her, this would be basically suicide of the relationship LMAO. It is so politically incorrect in so many ways, yet it is somehow too true in some ways. But at the same time, it is absolutely against my personal interests, it's an absolutely bomb of self-destruction that does nothing good. Or maybe I can do the opposite, if she said she was too pretty for me, I could say: Don't worry, I will wait for the inevitable decay of your beauty, and my inevitable gain in status and success so we can met each other half-way. --- There is a book on conscious relationships (Integral Relationships), and it has written the PRIMARY and SECONDARY fantasies men and woman have, and correlated to their spiral dynamics level. The primary is the obvious stuff This user had posted it before: ---- When it comes to the epistemology in general when it comes to dealing with humans, and stuff we are very biased about: We really don't know precisely people, people can be very random. Religion tried many times to describe what they are and what we are supposed to do, and how supposedly we would be happy this or that way, or political ideology, or internet "gurus". We try to sell to each other ideas of certainty, and meanwhile there are the ones that are all so very full of their certainty (The "Pervert" philosophically speaking) and we have "Hysteria" (Doubt)

Women that are more shallow they tend to want guys that are good at signaling status (ostentatiousness), meanwhile women that are more educated I noticed they tend to look a little deeper to read through their bullshit, even dig if they can afford that stupid car they own or they are deep into debt into for that crap. I mean, that different people will analyze status of others in different ways. Some of it is much more obvious and primal, like display of images.

By fakery I meant actual fakery. There are people that are actually wealthy and their instagram is shit. And people that are broke as heck but spent half a year's salary on the latest iPhone, or their instagram shows outtings but it's mostly staged and they don't even go that often. It is not trustworthy to the extent of a official bank statement backed legally, there are degrees to which it can be faked. But obviously, certain types of faking by themselves already signal resources to fake it to begin with. Like giving a diamond ring, even if you had to sell your used car to buy it. What doesn't matter to me are SIGNALS of status as a trustworthiness metric, from the point of view I don't take it as actual certain proof, not actual competence, unless that competence is the signaling itself. Actual competence can't be faked. This could be that people are looking for signaling of status itself, as the competence they look in a partner. Does she want to appear like she dates a guy that knows how to signal status? Is the signaling a competence? Of course signaling is a type of competence. I appreciate good images, great copywriting. Would I think I'm buying a course from a guy that is actually wealthy by simply looking at his rented house and cars? I wanna know the actual companies he built, this is how I can trust he is competent or not. It's because it's unrealiable. When I look at a hot woman she can't fake it. When I look at an instagram of some dude, that car could be rented, the clothing and jewelry actually cheap knock offs. But of course, some good well-fitted clothing always will look good. That is honest. But the fakery lies in the context behind it.

THIS. I feel like I'd fucking explode with high self-esteem. I had a girl that was a 8/10 in looks into me (I also had sexted with some others for briefer moments), but lived too far away for me to met. There is some type of woman I like, I get absolutely bonkers for, she was just that type. She could feel it, I was being so fucking creative and witty and funny with everything I was telling her, my tone of voice was deeper... It just did flow. Which doesn't happen when she isn't my type, or she doesn't show affection back. That was online. I wish I could bottle up that feeling and keep tapping into it at will. If I could be in that state with every interaction I got into. I felt like I was high on some sort of drug of how high motivation I had become, the rush of serotonin. If I had actually met her and we did the stuff we sexted about, I feel like I'd have literally become a new person. All of my little low self esteem personal stories would be all erased. Sometimes I try to brainwash myself into thinking: "What if I have had her already and just forgot?" So I can get that feeling again. It doesn't work, I can't trick my brain into seeing signals of high status that aren't there. Like if I had actually 10M USD in my bank account (or easily liquidable assets), and I knew it, I'd literally do stuff and behave in ways I wouldn't otherwise just by the knowledge of it. (This would be great copywriting for Leo Gura's new course on subconscious reprogramming): Feel like you have 100M in your bank account and had the most attractive and loving partner you could imagine, without actually having them. I believe this what I described is the Winner Effect (a term in biology and psychology describing how experiencing success, even in small ways, can lead to a heightened likelihood of future victories). --- If I can keep tapping on that, oh gosh, so sweet. I don't ever want to get used to beautiful woman.

The thing is that woman/people in general will respond to "honest" signals of wealth and status because their brains are wired for that. The societal stuff you mention, yeah, I mean... It is societal to recognize a expensive car, expensive clothing, high-status places, etc. But what matters it gets back to their limbic system and fires up the little spark in their cute brains. ("He is worthy of not being ghosted! Such a cutie! Oh gosh, look he even reads books and is into spirituality like I'm") I'm not stupid to fall for that shit, but my limbic brain still sees some dude in an expensive car as superior to me socially (But then, I won't get in debt for that.), emotionally we are just like the monkeys in the experiments, that will pay with their bananas to see pictures of the hot female monkeys and the photos of the competitors so they can watch out for the competition. And it is really fucked up, I agree. That we are so emotionally dumb like that. Now with AI Generated images, idk, this social media fakery will collapse, everyone will have high quality instagrams once it becomes indistinguable from reality those status signaling through digital images.

Btw, the low quality vs high quality stuff is basically already defined by Sexual Market Value. And I know, there is a philosophical point behind "Good" vs "Bad" (Same thing for low value vs high value) as in (Good is morally good peasant, and Bad is the morally bad but mighty war lord. Or... The opposite subversion of the words: Bad is the poor peasant that is unskilful and lacks power, Good is the war lord that is mighty with the sword and his conquest, even if unethical). You're getting tripped up on the semantics our society uses for bullshitting itself, and of course, it is a very serious problem. But relationships are about shallow survival mostly. But within that, I can have a girlfriend that finds me hot and attractive enough to discuss about this kind of stuff, as long as she is happy enough with me. This guy here has the best most well equilibrated view on it, he isn't doing it out of the bias of a pick-up artist trying to get laid: His book "The value of others" is amazing.

Bro, since most of your point is high quality AI generated research. I used my own machiavelian results-oriented system prompt/"gpt" to answer to your question/research. Stop using research/AI to get balls deep into theory, use it to rewire your subconscious to be more results-oriented, please. Think of this perspective: Everything is probabilistic, you get to actually collapse into reality the probabilistic distribution upon interaction. The theory you got yourself into is useless for getting results, and I'd say, even for getting more happy and having a deeper understanding of reality it is also bad, because it is coming from this sort of politicized/historical view-point, and that stuff is ripe for intellectual masturbation. I got to understand women better by actually chatting with them online than any kind of intellectual work, because your subconscious will just absorb them like a sponge. I used this GPT/SYSTEM prompt : (I edited its output to remove useless crap)

I use with Google Gemini Pro 2.5 inside of AI Studio: https://aistudio.google.com/app/library Copy and paste it into the SYSTEM PROMPT window at the top. Select the model at the RIGHT panel. This has some jailbreak capability too.

Every year that goes by and I don't have a woman to give all of that romantic love, I feel like it was a year that was devoid of a medium of expression that I feel pulsating very strongly inside. It's like... Why do we listen to music or look at the birds fly? it feels like if music and birds were gone. Some people couldn't care less about birds or music.

That's why cold messages on regulat social media is superior. Woman expect too little of men in those apps. Those apps were absolutely useless to me... Use them to scoop up their Instagrams and DM them instead. Also I have no idea if most of those woman even uninstalled the dating app already or will be online there long enough to talk. on Instagram at least they got that thing basically embedded into their phone, like, the equivalent of the clock app for men to keep themselves on time. 😂 I never saw a woman without Instagram. They are addicted to that thing, since they are superior social creatures to the average cave-man monk mode enjoyer meditating for the 6th time in the day after relapsing his no-fap streak.

I just wanted connection with an enlightened being, and she turned me down even after acknowledging each other as being part of the same fabric of existence (I still love her, and always will, she's an amazing human being)

I have this (perhaps weird) fantasy, that if I had a good girlfriend (ergg, and lived in my own place, and was financially secure), I'd become this beacon of high energy, basically have good self-esteem and keep conquering my goals back-to back, including spiritual. But I guess it's probably a pipe dream, if she is at least mentally stable I'd be extremely grateful already. Amen! But there is plenty of guys that have girlfriends (The so called unicorns), that actually have low self-esteem and are full of self-doubt, and it blows my brains off. Point being... Both people have to be very in sync to improve on each other. Otherwise it's just a fuck fest (literally).

LOL. Makes me remember of this female friend that I have online (She is not in the forum). She is pretty conscious and accepting, like, even does nude art and stuff. But I had been so lonely, I'd always send her emails to her as an outlet, I'd creatively sprinkle my sexual desire there in long texts I'd write to her in form of... creative writing. Again, she was very spiritual. And my devil lil desperate hungry ghost mind would cling to it. One day she thought it was too personal, and told me to get a real girlfriend and she was getting uncomfortable lol. I thought it would be a funny post to write about this story.

I think anything about humans are never precise. It's always probabilistic. It's perfectly within possibility for a homeless guy to marry an attractive woman. It's just unlikely. If a homeless guy tried enough, with enough woman, and he developed himself emotionally, he could definitely make a woman have uncontrollable pity for him, if he really gets into her mind. Like, I get this idea that if we took an average guy and gave him a lot of fame, he would get lady. But the average guy isn't famous by definition, therefore he isn't average anymore.

I'm the opposite, I think about what they want even before approaching, and I think, there is no way any woman would want a broke hobo like me, but somehow they fall in love. What could I give her? Basically just wrap her up with a ton of love. On wait, I had just wasted years doing exactly that, but I did bite the "Blue Pill" too hard back then and I did that hundreds of times for a single woman, perhaps, I'm on to something here... What if I had instead of being dumb doing it online with a single woman... I had done it locally, and kept going for a new woman whenever the current woman is unsatisfied with me after the initial attraction wears off. I might have been so much happier, perhaps my self-esteem would have been so much higher of getting this out of my system that I'd have had further progress economically and spiritually by not being tied down by this like a hungry ghost eating be from the inside. I did so much selfless stuff for love, it feels retarded. But wasn't really selfless, it was just coming from fear and low self-esteem, and maybe 40% of actually wanting to dive heads deep into that kind of love. Some say men or women are incapable of that. But I think, it's people doing the right things with the wrong people. Maybe, it might have that I get involved in an accident or acquire a disease and just physically become actually really ugly, then all of those fantasies I have about love would be thrown out of the window. I remember seeing a lady with her face with lots of burn scars, and I could see that she would have been so gorgeous without all of those scars, maybe that kind of woman would be my type if I had some facial accident.

It's all survival. Even the niceness and romance is survival, that need to feel emotionally accepted by somebody. A hardcore, spiritually independent person from sensorial experience is just fine with eating insects to survive and living in a literal cave. I'm the weak one that craves companionship. Unable to suppress latent instinctual desires or desires built through meaning. Even the want for food is weakness that makes you move yourself to chew it, so you don't die. By weakness, I mean, anything that keeps you from being able to just sit down and chill in complete contentment. But even the Buddha was against extreme asceticism (deemed unnecessary for the practices to lead to his kind of enlightenment), he said "the middle path" where you keep just essentials (what you need to keep practicing daily the dhamma), but don't torture yourself on purpose is the best. Personally I just embraced the reality, and how I can build my fantasies within it if I put the right resources in place. i.e: Give a mentally stable woman that I find attractive what they want and I'll mostly get what I want reciprocally. The woman I like also want to delude themselves like me to live the romantic fantasy within the confines of relationship where we exchange other kinds of value. We like tucking that stuff away, it's a turn off and emotionally messed up. For the woman that I'd get emotionally close enough to get involved like that, they already perceived at that moment enough value, then, poof, of course, next moment it could be they see that I can't provide all the value they want, so they simply break out of the fantasy and go have it with somebody else and simply forget what has happened. Paradoxically, the illusion of love in a relationship always comes with affirmations we would only reserve for gods, despite the truth being the opposite, we want even for a moment to play pretend our adoration as if we were gods. I feel utterly worshiped and adored, the words of affirmation of being told I'll be loved by them until the day we die, the way they say they want to cuddle and caress me, and to sexually satisfy me, be sexually playful in bed, as opposed to the slightly depressing opposite of cuming on a paper and flushing it down after beating one off for some random image on the internet in a random day, like some animal alone in a cage.