goldpower123

Yeah, and it's easier to externalize it than to see how I can take responsibility for it I haven't looked into the life purpose course, to be honest I have negative beliefs around them. What helps me is just remembering I'm way more than where I work, so I don't identify with my external day to day life and what I do on a regular basis and the emotions I feel, I'm way more than any of that. So I can kinda put my game hat on when doing worldly things then put my God hat on when working on myself or doing spirituality or anything personal.

Anyone know of good ways to replace PMO and transmute sexual energy? And any recommended practices?

Porn fucked me right up. I'm a normal guy, but it turned me into this really weak, timid, awkward feminine guy. Nothing wrong with that, except when I decided to get on "No Fap" I found myself identifying with my sexuality as a real Man. I was really more masculine and it feels authentic. I'd love to thank No Fap, but really I think it's just porn that's messed up

I used to be a chronic jack-offer. The last year I've really cut it down heaps and barely do it anymore, working towards a real relationship. I feel like my state of mind and consciousness is returning to it's natural state like when I was a kid. It bought me back full circle. I have a deeper understanding on life issues as they come and I am much calmer internally. Childhood memories are flooding back slowly as I continue doing this and I'm starting to identify with that. The Ego is loosening it's grip on my life and I feel like a more pressurized soul within. I know it's the Truth.

I'm interested in seeing if anyone knows a good website, person, book etc. that has a great case for explaining paranormal phenomena. I personally think this kind of thing does exist and life is actually far more meaningful and fun when the realm of Soul, energy etc. opens up. Like for example the movie the conjuring, as much as it is hollywood programming do you think there is truth to that movie even symbolically?

When I look around, I see a lot of people are like zombies. They chase their egos. It's all that exists to them, no deeper truth. It's like they're slugging around in the mud all lazy, complaining, competing, surviving, fighting for any bit of control they can grip on to. Instead of being who they are, they be who they superficially want to be. I find it a major disrespect to myself to surrender to the comforts and trappings society offers me. It is my ego and your ego. I hold your head under to keep mine afloat. How social media, puppet rappers and modern news outlets sneakily condition you through egoic agendas to think how they think. Yet no one ever talks about it. I mean duh why would they, they have to preserve their fake selves. My family is included, completely severed and vulnerable to these forces. Although my father is the most conscious one of all and I cherish our deep relationship. He understands the matrix system. Every day I must stomach in that I share this life with entities and robot humans that's only job is to deter me from my path... They say nothing and don't show you any authentic attention, but when you slip up, oh boy, they're there for THAT. In their animalistic minds they secretly want you to fail so they feel better about themselves! I don't 'hate' the world, and it's not their fault, and I'm sure if I was an enlightened guru I would love accept and welcome it all. But this is just how I feel sometimes like I have this light in me, and because of that light, the devil is trying to get rid of me