Striving for more

Isn't it obvious ... Girls in today's society have a disproportionate amount of power and options compared to men, like remarkably disproportionate. Covid, social media & dating apps have made this phenomenon far far worse. Essentially girls are spoilt for choice ... Not just beautiful women but even a female 6, has far superior choice and social prowess than a male 7.5. Nice guys aren't good looking enough, high value enough, rich enough and especially aren't good looking enough. The dickheads are most likely good looking, or supremely high value in some other way + good looking enough beyond a minimum threshold. P.s : I am not complaining or playing victim or crying about this, I accept reality & basic market economics 100% .... BUT, what is disturbing is the complete contempt & disregard many women actually have to "nice guys", "Incels", or guys they are unattracted to. The term "Incel" itself has a negative connotation & IMO is nearly similar (but obviously nowhere near as comparably extreme or damaging as) dating equivalent of N***** It's one thing to reject but to do so with contempt shows that many of these women are just spoilt and have no empathy for all the struggling guys, who are struggling purely due to their genetic disadvantage, they try to overide that but are met with ridicule and discontempt. I recently swallowed the black pill .... It has it's flaws, but it gets a lot of stuff right I think. (I dunno challenge me I am open minded, minds always changing).

Thanks... I know sleep is important but I thought I could make it with multiple sets of 2-3 hours. Clearly if you need long cycles then not. It would be way more evolutionarily convenient if sleep was like charging up a phone battery & you could just see "ohh I'm at 70%. let me just recharge to 100 with a 1 hour nap & then get going again". ^ I wish humans were designed this way.

It depends what stage of life & maturity they're at. I pumping girls I didn't find attractive either physically or psychologically & even one time I fucked a prostitute. But every time it was painfully obvious that I'd completely wasted my energy & I felt pissed I hadn't woken up early to study or workout instead. I decided from then it's either my minimum standards or it's my hand & a tissue. No sex or even masturbating is actually better than undesirable sex. Masturbating is like eating a tasty ice cream. Undesirable sex is like drinking you're own pee whilst momentarily deluding urself into it "tasting good", only after to spit it out with a bitter taste like dam "why did I do that dude, I could've just had some water?"

Looolz he's the most un masculine youtuber & a disgrace to da vinci. Most of the greatest minds & creatives in history used power naps. It would take me a lot of rewiring & perseverance to pull this off, I really struggle to nap but perhaps it can be trained like instant muscle memory & yeah, the challenge be wid you sir! The quest comes with thee, the chosen one.

I have a PDF File of Act.org Textbook (As shortcut on my windows wallpaper background) You can highlight it straight away >> but when I exit the shortcut & reload it the highlights are gone What should I do? Is there a microsoft app for this where the highlights & notes are kept? Second tech question : When I read an article on brave browser, safari or google >> How do I instantly highlight & take notes of key points?

@asifarahim Is that called EpubReader Calibre on mic store & u have to buy it $5-10 ?

I just had vision for the kind of women I want to meet for myself. (I don't want a monogamous girlfriend ... But I want to regularly sleep with a women like this) : Beautiful in an Mediterranean exotic way speaks 3 + languages, sexy accent (especially Hispanic or Italian, but I am not rigid in what would turn me on) Feminine, likes dance, yoga, Intuitive High sex drive, loves sex, (No stage blue repression) Loves being a "slut", likes dancing sexy & dressing sexy Adventurous, outgoing Fun, risk taking Likes extreme sports, would hop on a motorbike or a quadbike with me, would go drag racing with me, Likes weird parties, likes dress up, "pimps & hoes" parties, Likes art & grand displays, fireworks & nature, would go tripping in the forest with me. Infinite freedom, deep connections with multiple beautiful women, living the Island life. Ibeza, Mexico, Portugal, Canary Islands, Columbia. Italy. I know what lifestyle I desire, & it isn't "stage orange" or crafted by movies or some shit. I was born for this. I wasn't born for the Monk life, but I am spiritual, spiritual is subjective to you always.

Did my "first" approach today. Approached chick in supermarket, spoke to her, made eye contact & asked for her number. I've done approaches before, but this is the first real approach + ask for number I've done in ages, if ever. She had a boyfriend, but it felt good anyway. My standard is now minimum 1 approach a day, every day from now on, to just build up the habit. Just 1 approach per day, ideally ask at least 1 phone number per day. Mayn I can't wait to not have "9-5" (6-8) anymore & to be self - employed, so I can do more PD stuff. Just so much to focus on, I need better energy & cognition so I can study for self - employment skills on the side, maybe I'm overwhelming myself, maybe I want too much at once.

Today I went to the post office. This woman accidentally pushed in front of me & I politely pointed it out to her. In fact, she was exceptionally hot. Age roughly 34 - 38 In workout / Yoga clothes, toned Tanned, radiant, glowing face & soft cheeks, Friendly, feminine energy We laughed a bit about the que. Then I went to post my items. As I did this, I kept thinking about how I would approach her ... But my mind kept making excuses why I shouldn't. (the unconscious automatic acceptance of these excuses just killed my courage in the moment). "She's probably married" "Girls only like older guys" We walked out at the same time & there was my chance. Then she walked fast ahead (Why not just run up to her in the rain?) I saw the bus. I just walked on the bus home. On the bus, I felt this common empty feeling of regret & cowardice. A long overdue feeling that I won't stand no more. She seemed so perfect. So dam hot! She was just everything, physically & energetically. It was at this painful moment on the bus that I realized ... I need pickup ... and pickup needs me. It is a spiritual need. And amongst the hollowness of society & my life & tinder, what I need is pickup. I have approached sometimes these past few months ... But I notice a pattern. I only seem to approach when the situation is "reasonable", "appropriate". It's only when no one is looking, the girls exactly my age & it "makes sense" that I would approach. If there's any "reasonable" excuse not to, or imagined embarrassment, I coward away. I need to step up to the challenge. I need to be willing to approach that super hot older feminine, yoga girl, who seems too mature & out of my league. Basically, I need to approach any women I feel attracted to, regardless of the situation, her age, the location or what excuses my mind generates. No bullshit Religious commitment to the approach. Why only resign myself to dumb innocent & confused looking 19 year olds? (I probably approach them more because they seem easier). I am destined to express my sexual desire, It is part of my being, It's time to have the courage to be authentic.

Started to lose my head a bit before. Have done a lot today. Slept better too. Have listed many of my clothing items & taken photos of items I don't need anymore. Have tidied my room completely & I worked out for the first time in months. I also meditated in the morning & I plan to keep this habit for life. It took me a while to convince myself that it's even worth it but recently I realised like ooh shit there's probably nothing more important. I will need more direct experience to see if I benefit from it. But my gut & the reddit anecdotal reports tell me that it's well fucking worth it. No I am not competing with anyone. I can empathise with others but no need to compete or compare myself, that is just a stupid mind trick to get me back into old neurotic patterns. It's been a very productive 2 days, apart from some short - lasting psychological backlash. Been listening to pick up theory every time I clean up or do chores & it's starting to make sense. I believe in myself & that I can become a social butterfly this year, with great networking, social & dating skills. It just takes experience. I don't have to be a loner or a moody guy anymore, I do not deserve that. I deserve whatever I desire in every area of life, I will just need patience, perseverance & clear intentions & my intentions are already clear. So to patience & perseverance. I can really feel my creativitiy muscle strengthening too. The ideas & interconnections just don't stop, it's like a waterful of creative ideas. I just need to get better at storing & integrating them. Voice notes, voice to text google keep, 1 note & microsoft whiteboard, tools like these will help. I need to not forget about my idea to create a course, it's a great idea with a good outlined plan, but I must incubate it whenever I have time or it will fade away & I'll lose interest. I don't feel good mentally right now at all, but there is still a sense of optimism & gratitude. I thank god for my oppurtunities, for the goldmine of information available & for the awareness of how precious these oppurtunities are. I thank god that I I've built myself out of a life long rut in the last 2 years, and although I have long way to go, I can really feel the positive grooves starting to carve. I don't want to waste time so I cba to journal much for the next couple weeks. I'm off on the heroes journey, maybe I'll die along the way. I don't care. I'm taking the risks.

I'm so fucking shit & useless. Trying to package items to sell & other items to get refund. I can't even do it. I'm fucking retarded. wht would take most people 2 minutes, it takes me hours. so fucking useless. I've lost so much life to jus tbeing slow & dumb. I hating myself again. I said I wouldn't write but now I am here again, because I actually tried to do stuff but I'm fucking slow. I broke the fucking packaging & ripped the bubble wrap. I can't even understand instructions. I hate myself again. I leave the forum stilll & become introverted because when I hate myself, I fucking hate everyone els.e

Stage red Energy. Been procrastinating this evening, "because my mind's tired" ... Excuses. I'm being a little fucking bitch. I use anger now. No time for forum for a few days, internet addiction, thinking addictions, hyperstimulation. The enemy is coming for me. Litterally has a gun to my fucking head. If i don't succeed big this year I fucking die. I will kill myself at least. High stakes. 0 procrastination tomorrow, let's get away from this place. lets go, feeling competitive as fuck. With myself & the world PICK UP, TECHNOLOGY, MILLIONS IN THE BANK, INFNITE ENERGY, MEDITATION, HOLISTIC PEAK PHYSICAL HEALTH, SUSTAINED INTO "OLD AGE", LIVE TILL 200, WILL LOOK 30 WHEN I'M 100. INFNITE CREATIVITY. INFITIE SEX WITH FUCKING GODESSES, 3 MEXICAN GIRLS, 10/1O SUCKING MY DICK. MILLIONS IN THE BANK. FREEDOM. INFINITE CREATIVITY, JOY & SUCCESS. POWER. PERSONAL POWER. STAGE RED TIME. TIME TO FIGHT. TIME TO GET DIRTY. DIRTY WITH MY DESIRES. I WANT 3 MEXICAN GIRLS ON MY DICK. IF U CATCH ME ON THIS FORUM AGAIN THIS WEEK. PUNCH ME IN THE FUCKING FACE & SHOOT MY FUCKING DICK OFF.

My god I just forgot how important music is. I just love music. It's so fucking useful. I was stuck in a ocd thought loop, addicted to thinking, wasting my precious life thinking in loops ... Then I heard Johnny Cash. I forgot how much I like Johnny Cash. Everytime I bore myself with overthinking & get out of the present moment, I listen to music. But good music, real music. Modern music just isn't cutting it for me, sometimes it does, but it's like 1 song out 50 songs is great & moves me, amongst all the trash. But the timeless classics, they will always be there, bringing me back out of my head, in to my body, my intution & hopefully the present moment.

What's it like being an INFP? (Biggest strengths & weaknesses) I really never understood this "F" vs "P" distinction... Almost All humans think & feel a lot? , & you clearly think through even the subtlest of details & observations.

To anyone who likes reading my journal : I am making a new Journal By having some readers it creates this imaginary sense of accountability & duty to not fuck up anymore & conquer my life so I can inspire others who have suffered (& so I can make my ego happy ) Why new journal & what will change? I want a fresh start I want to write less often, write more concisely & say more with less This has multiple positive benefits : If I am concise, I build up my communication skills ("What am I really trying to say here" (Leo Gura) ) I get straight to the point > therefore it's easier to pick out the lessons & insights within my posts I waste less time waffling & stuck in thought loops (Better to meditate) It's more neat > easier to read back through my journal & see the progress, reflect & remind myself of the lesson /Insights & Most importantly > Mental Clarity >... Take a step back, think about why I am doing this, the vison ... How I should strucutre it ... and then let the "high yield technique" do it's thing for a year or 2. .. (Structure > Content)

Yes ... me too. Need the highest quality teacher/program, who has positive results & reviews & a style that resonates with me, so I know it's not a waste. I've been listening to "The unapologetic man podcast" recently : Don't agree with everything he says ... (seems bit too hung up on gender roles) but his NLP stuff is decent.

This is your ingrained subconscious trying to keep you stuck, the mind doesn't want you to change your life & identity.... But your soul does, side with the soul. Go & approach many other women, abundance. Try & forget about her & act like you don't give a shit for now. These negative sensations are just a trick. Also, it proves nothing. There could a thousand reasons why she flakes, it's not about you. (BTW, I feel a huge lack of integrity when I give you this advice ... because I am way further behind you on the journey, it's easier to say than to embody yourself of course).

Perhaps it's because the mind tends to hold on to negative experiences & thoughts & ignore the positive? Or an incel's mind ... , that's certainly how it is with me. It's like you're stuck with Incel OS & you want to boot to windows or mac. ** No, boot to CHAD OS LOL (Not that you necessarily need it, perhaps raw action will solve everything for you) but perhaps NLP & Affirmations will help. I've started an NLP / Affirmations / LOA practice ... Not that it can replace approaching of course. But maybe it helps.

But isn't this guy just saying that you have to be good looking. Isn't this video just telling average & below people to quit? How this video helpful? He's basically saying bad boys are just good looking & I don't think that makes sense, there's plenty of good looking "nice guys" or shy guys

She gave me her Instagram name because of she "left her phone at home". won't even bother. I feel that I convey the opposite look, desperation, no options, I wish there was a way I could hypnotise myself into thinking I have options - in order to convey a better look, shortcut the process. Dude you've clearly come so far. I've only really skimmed through this but I'm going to read it start to finish because it's inspiring. (I'm the only British guy who likes using American language, lol).

@Roy Thanks buddy. The problem is it's like a feedback loop > I start feeling shaky > she sees this & I see her see me shake, then I am lost for words for 5 seconds. Then from that point it feels impossible for me to recover energetically or conversationally.

@StarStruck Bro I beg you elaborate on this means !! (tbf probably hard to explain without showing but is there a name for the technique I can look up?) I feel like if I rush in to it as newbie I might come off as a creep though

@StarStruck Do you think meditation sped up your progress in becoming confident? I did an approach today, she was friendly & wanted the attention, showing interest, but I was stuck with this shakiness in my body & I couldn't think of much to say. It's like the conversation deserved to be really uplifting & flirtatious but I just don't know how to pull it off in the moment, my body just ruins it for me & I only have time to aproach 1-3 times a day right now.

Suffering : I am still suffering Physical pain in the body Body is not healed teeth hurt, teeth needs more fixing, expensive procedures again Severe allergies, severe allergies to cure Disrupted sleep - Struggling with the heat & noisy atmospher Too much chemicals today - Enough I used shampoo today ("It will be different this time") no, I never learn from my lessons Headaches, slow mind, blocked nose, sneezing, coughing, pain, rash on the back, runny nose, sleep deprivation But I still maintain FAITH. I will solve all of my problems, needs & voids & go above & Beyond, quickly & sustainably. To ongoing growth, to progress, to infinite knowledge & infinite growth. My goals have been slowed down by factors seeming "out of my control", but tbh most of these were preventable, I just wasn't a "strategic motherfucker" I desire to become a "time master", the Mythical god with eagle eyes, who can see into the future & direct the present towards the future, considering all possibilities, contingencies, & probabilities.... Never losing sight of priorities, time & discipline always contained by sustainable tools, & living constantly with a sense of purpose ... never falling back into sloth, or addictions (SUBTLE ADDICTIONS, OH YEH, THOSE ARE SCARY AINT THEY? MMM YEH THEY ARE SCARY AS FUCK, NEVER FORGET THE SUBTLE ADDICTIONS, COS I WON'T EVEN NOTICE I HAVE THEM WITHOUT AWARENESS) My major 3 self help habits to build & maintain : Daily to do list + top 3 priorities list Weekly & Monthly Google calendar Daily journal > Reflections, lessons, Insights WITHOUT THESE 3 ... I WILL FAIL. TO DO LIST SCHEDULLING JOURNAL

INTJ = Architect, not logician. @diamondpenguin I wouldn't compare personalities off a couple comments on some forum. Personality is way more complex than 4 symbols (applied erroneously). My personality is fluid, I am every personality simultaneously, no limits mofo.