Natasha Tori Maru

I'm surprised he's not all over it. He may be, I haven't checked. I am not subscribed to him. Don't want to pollute my algorithms to that extent 🥹

William McCasland missing Retired US Airforce General tied to UFO programs disappearance.

Heya ❤️ I lost my grandfather in hospice - I stayed by his side for his passing. It was confronting. He was the predominant male figure in my life. A fine artist who trained me in oils, watercolour, acrylic, pen on paper, pencil and charcoal. I had a creative bond with him in a way I will never have with another man. His death was the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed - only met by seeing the birth of my brother, in majesty. There is so much stigma around death. It wasn't negative. He was purifying before my eyes at the end. The nurses in the hospice made sure he was comfortable. He came into such an intense state of being. He was vibrating as he passed. I don't know any other way to describe it. As much as his loss was a strike to my heart, I wouldn't have missed it for anything. He responded to me right up until the end. He seemed to hear all. Your grandmother will love you being present. Love your warm hands on hers. Love the timber of your voice. I don't share my grandfather's passing to detract from your challenging time; merely to emphasis just how much this moment will be cemented as a gift in time for you and her to share. Much love

It's supposedly very nutritious 🤤

Earthlings was the reason I stopped consuming industrial farmed animal products - as much as possible.

Probably the forum platform more than anything. In real life I have a lot more at my disposal to communicate with

I wish there was a full on breakdown in-depth interview that went into Blizzards history (and the Activision merge). Jeff Kaplan goes into how turd operations and marketing people eat the soul of good game designers and creators, and guts out a business. I really enjoy interviews with the guys behind Blizzard (I am a huge Chris Metzen fangirl huehue). NGL I hate Lex Friedman

Yeah, my casual everyday routine. Because it's never, ever the same. There's always a surprise. Always novelty. Most people just fail to see it.

It's totally the sneaky ego, humbleness, ain't it? Slinky slippery sly 👀 Little bastard self, always squirming into a new form!

Rofl, that's more like it! 🤣 @theleelajoker I think it's when I am answering a question that is more nebulous; where what I present could be any number of potential answers and I do not consider any one to be THE one. I am not so firm in my opinions and observations and very open to changing them. I change them all the time. Suffice it to say it is not insecurity - more my personal desire to keep things open. I do like to be polite and respectful. But humble? Heh heh. I do not think I am humble. And all politeness and respect can switch off in a flash if there is a transgression. I can be pretty harsh with tongue lashings. Especially if you are a naughty little shit user who needs to have their head pushed in 😈

Could be just the way this is phrased but it sounds hella avoidant. 'Get' inside your mind sounds like an intrusion. If I feel like someone is intruding something isn't right with the relationship, me, or them. But yeah, funny choice of words

@bazera killer yep yep yep agree 🙏 I view it as: this is my teammate on my side. We got each other's backs. We help each other achieve our goals. And have a hell of a fun time doing it 😁 I like to let people open up naturally. And working with men, I have found, professionally and just in life: when you support them in their lifes work their openness and investment in the relationship is enhanced tenfold. They just naturally express emotions. And they also end up leaning on me to understand some feelings/emotions themselves. And due to that the intimacy naturally flourishes. No probing or pushing for emotional expression needed. This is just in general though, general temperament is unique. Some men just never open up emotionally, same with some women. Rolls back again to nothing being simple. Cannot be reductionist. Which is really challenging because I see men always wanting step 1 2 3 to apply to get it right. Which is the masculine way. But one method doesn't work across the unique spectrum of people and personality. And generally leads to wild generalisations and things like red pill etc

This last passage catches me. I cannot ever totally know another person or their story. But if you were in any sort of circumstances when young where your sense of self was encroached on by another. If you were ever made to feel responsible for someone else's large emotional reaction, it can cause a less stable sense of self to arise. It could be because you have so much openness and empathy the boundaries where you start and end, and where your partner starts and ends, can merge. If a woman isn't ready for that it can feel like their sense of self is merging so, intensly they are losing themselves. This can feel like a death of sorts, of the individual. As much as I think relationships are about dissolving the boundaries between us; they still need to remain to truly experience love - because love exists in the space between. It just might be you have not been with a women who was very very aware of exactly who she was. You might just benefit from the sort of dynamic where one partner is more grounded and resiliant. I do think though, you are on the higher sensitivity and receptivity scale; which has its own unique challenges. You mentioned you have had a hard year. Maybe this has been a big rattle up from the universe to steer you to do a lot of inner work? I bet you there are a serious of questions your year has prompted that keep arising. Overall I love relationships for growth. Ain't nothing else that can pull up your unconscious and show it to you like a romantic partner. It's a different domain for consciousness work. I don't think I answered you or even that this is right on the mark. Just what came out

Gotcha I think your point is more nuanced than the title suggests - which was slightly misleading. I think it's a mystery isn't it? Codependent arising of experience.

@Ramasta9 do you feel you have a stable sense of self, or does it feel as if you are very 'airy' and transient, able to shift perspectives so well you can lose yourself?

I've never encountered that dynamic, now I think on it. I have always had men naturally open up around me. I never put pressure on a man to open up before they are comfortable. It has always naturally happened as a result of an intense shared experience, or when recounting past or history. Many times the most intense emotional sharing happened when roley-poley playing in bed after sex. Not saying I am super special, but I think I come across as a non-threat. Or I do not probe at a mans emotions, unless I feel they are responding to my questions in some way. I naturally like to find out what sort of purpose a man has and figure out how I can best support him in that purpose. I've always been that way, naturally. That's not to say they are the main character for me - I have my own career and extensive hobbies. But when it comes to relationships I am very flexible with how I live. I enjoy to merge my lifestyle with a man's to support him and work out how I can flex my time. I like to push my limits. I grow a lot from pressure. So I put energy into helping my man achieve what his goals are, as well as having the privilege to see into his emotional world behind the scenes. Self sufficient guys are great! It's all about connection for me. I have been in long term relationships where we were very independent. But the emotional connection, intellectual connection and sex was really high quality. Quality over time for me. I've been in LTR (3/4 years) living apart the whole time. I've also been in LTR living together (7years). Every dynamic is different. Being open emotionally has a lot of factors. Timing is a big one. Many people are so starved of connection they can heap it all onto the first person who shows authentic intimacy. I am very open and non-judgemental. But very honest. Not all people are like this; there are so many reasons a girl might be turned off by emotional intimacy. Maybe it's too soon. Maybe they feel smothered. Maybe they do not have the resiliency to hold space for intense emotions. Most of it, in my view, is immaturity from a woman. Some chicks want too much emotion of from their men. In general most guys open up emotionally with me when looking for a solution. Women share emotions just to share. So there are women who will claim their man isn't emotional or intimate with them. Often this is just a misunderstanding as a lot of guys I have met don't talk about shit like that unless they are looking for a solution or advice. Having said that, there are also dudes who are always open emotionally. And that's chill for me too. It's all about what's normal and baseline for their temperament. Really complex topic - you can't reduce it down to 'opening up turns women off'. That's simply way too reductionist.

Gotcha - so resonance and vibration, for you, is not part of Infinity, or infinite consciousness? I think I do not understand how your claim holds under the term infinity. Infinity encompasses vibration and resonance, no?

I've never withdrawn from a man displaying emotional depth. Or opening up. It's usually when neediness or dependency is transmitted that I perceive the potential for a negative dynamic to emerge.

I'll check this out - really appreciate the link

@Monster Energy It is my understanding you think Leo's model of reality does not include vibration and resonance?

@Leo Gura EverQuest? We going back 🫠 You were probably into Vidya around the same time I was - my Dad and I used to build PCs and I recall MS-DOS os nshit. 8-bit PC games were my first introduction

@Jannes I don't think anyone is contesting you can live for 40 days without food 💀 It's definitely Conner's authenticity that is up for debate. Dude is sly.

I did some PvP - totally different ballgame! I only ever got to dualist rank though. Classes are way too homogeneous now with 6 different solutions for every combo. Needless complexity and trying to cater to every player. Only did twos in arena and battlegrounds

I was big on Diablo 2 prior to going hard into WoW.

Gotta agree WoTLK was peak for me. Ulduar Hardmode unlocks and Algalon were sick. I healed and tanked the black hole explosions as a priest/spriest against that dual wielding fuckdumpster of a boss. I have the feat of strength and a few really hard to obtain titles like Immortal and Undying. I played through BC as well, but WoTLK surpassed it imo. I went vanilla > BFA and raided with top oceanic guilds (no 1/2 guilds). Back then revealing you were a chick was drama central. Even applying to those guilds. Fuck I had a full resume, stat sheets and logs of play to submit to get in. I remember Not Steamboat putting me through the most toxic elitist sledging to see if I could handle how brutal it was. They thought they were so hardcore. It is its own little status hierarchy world. Tbh WoW is just one of those games where it grabs you or it doesnt. I can see why people just don't get into it. I had a group of IRL mates who played with me which made it special, then I met like 7-8 more good mates through the game.