Natasha Tori Maru

I couldn't find any external Instagram links (or cross pposts) to the clip on a general website trawl - but after looking chatGPT came up with the below:

To be clear sex isn't just penis in vagina. And none of what I express has anything to do with relationships being centred around sex. It is one element of a healthy whole (even none at all, if both individuals are asexual or prefer it that way). Like everything, sex fades. Connection has to remain though.

Haha, I imagine him leaving the house and dry retching at 90% of the social domain

Hahaha the mortarboards? With the tassle shit? 😭

@Joseph Maynor we aren't trying to date each other in this thread... We are describing real face to face relationships.

What is for you? It is quite individual, this is my own experience of myself, my past, and dynamics that have enriched me and worked ( that I speak from ).

For me it is both. Emotional and physical connection. Communication is always essential but this comes down to listening and paying attention. It isn't hard to remain connected with those two elements in play. Maturity & negotiation skills. Someone who doesn't freak out at the first sign of conflict. Can calmly assess, remove themselves when too charged up. Understands their own needs - this is huge. If you don't understand yourself you won't be able to communicate shit because you will just transmit all the wrong shit to your partner. Sex is sacred. I can't personally go without it. And I won't ever lie to placate a mans ego. I'll tell them when it aint' right. And I want to know that the man is satisfied also. Negotiate what we can and meet in the middle. Compromise and invest. If the sex dies there is something wrong with the emotional and cerebral connection. I view it like a barometer for the relationship. Quality over quantity. When women do not want sex, outside of a physiological issue or genuine asexuality - something is amiss. I speak in general here. Tiredness, just not in the mood etc are genuine reasons not to want to fuck - I am not saying to give it up no matter what. It's about the overall pattern. It is if there is a change in her. Suddenly wanting no sex. Not ever getting turned on like she used to etc. I recognize we age. We slow down. Things change. I accept and change with them. Always checking in on myself, my man, and the relationship. All three need to thrive. Sometimes one of us needs to take on more work. Sometimes less. Good times, hard times - as long as what we create together is worth it and the trajectory is up. When one person gives up on themselves, me or the relationship - doom.

@AION Some more attention for you - here

I mean fuck - I think we learned different social dynamics and play because of a different environment. 3rd spaces are disappearing, drinking is on the decline, everything can be delivered. We are atomized in our tiny environments with entertainment on tap. Getting out of the house for to something to do was more common. I mean how often was it we were bored and chilling, sex would fill up a whole afternoon! Distractions are everywhere now, lowering our quality of attention. We can get food delivered - groceries. All of these missing elements were situations where you could potentially meet that someone.... All opportunities. These are growing less and less for future generations. So, they learn through the savage world of dating apps that bring out poor behavior to try to get ahead. It isn't like this for everyone - but it is for many. It is only logical than men go for PUA / cold approach and all manner of cerebral methods to try to understand. And they end up learning the wrong thing because the world of social media and dating apps is nothing like navigating a real man or woman. It creates a weird as fuck gamified artificial dynamic that leads to poor conclusions for both sexes.

I just think a lot of the guys here are under-socialized and haven't had a really quality, deep and healthy long term attachment with a strong and put together woman with healthy love attachment. I also think dating apps are horrible and fucked up a whole generation. And many of the younger crowd have this dynamic they have grown and learned through.

My fan is back! Always popping in JUST to pay me some attention. Didn't contribute in any way but to talk to me This was how I understood the framing of the thread. Not to capture or try to use force. But to have her be so seduced by the thought of you she will come willingly - through healthy dynamics (and for the man to be so seduced by the dance also). I answered the question not from any sort of low consciousness perspective, where one might leverage a woman via attachment issue exploitation, codependency etc. But from the perspective of two highly conscious agentic individuals, mature with their shit in order - coming together to create something beautiful between them. Being able to physically please a woman (body and soul) relies on fully listening to her and willingly taking direction - especially in bed. So it can be a proxy for a good man who pays attention. Quality of attention. That matters. Listening is a challenge for everyone.

Shit like this breaks my heart

Fuck, he's got that recurring shit going STRAIGHT to infinity

Oh you boys! Trying to reach God through a woman! 😋 I love men, can't lie 😍

@Inliytened1 Goldeneye. The golden gun 🔫

Not gonna lie - I have had such intense, single pointed focus meditation sessions where all is so married in union it was the bliss of orgasm. After I really considered orgasm; it is a pure state of absolute being. Total single pointed focus. Irrefutable. A total inability to seperate mind in that state. It makes sense the deepest state of focussed meditation feel like orgasm, somehow. I shit you not, the feeling was the same. And so utterly shocking. It is a practice to reach those states though. I cannot get there without a lot of dedicated time. A purge of modern life does it. Isolation. It is no wander sex and orgasm is a huge drive for humanity if this is what we touch on. Who knows ...

If you want a real, emotional and intellectual connection with a woman, where you are each defined individuals with true connection to yourselves, but want to dissolve all the things that might be in the way - safety will always be necessary. Cannot have real connection without safety. After all, union, connection, infinity are Love - fear is the corruption, safety is the salve ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 hearts on fire !

For whatever reason, and maybe I am delulu - I don't view fantasy so negatively. Not like I did when younger. I think after having my heart slaughtered 4/5 times in various deep, long term relationships I learned to trust I will recover from heartbreak. So I'm willing to risk all because I know I'll always be okay after, even though the pain and suffering can be nigh unbearable. Romantic fantasy is okay because I trust myself with it now. My relationship to it changed compared to when I was more innocent.

You can disagree and it could also be correct - which is why I added all people are different. This is just how I work with being hooked into obsessive thoughts. The idea of the kind of life you could have by being with a man is the seed. What you can co-create. It's a fantasy about the future. It isn't about the future being set in stone and laid out perfectly on a timeline, it's about potential

I wish I had a magic formula! But like with men, all people are different. All women are different. For me? 1) show me your mind, and illustrate what sort of life and future you want. Show me where I can be in that future. A sum greater than it's parts we can tap into with more power than any single one of us could ever grasp... And then water that seed gradually over time until the thought is a giant weed I can't uproot from my mind. 2) listen, connect. so I can not only feel you intellectually, but emotionally. Feelings are how we make value judgements and therefore, decisions 3) touch me, soothe me, hold me, love me 4) make sex not about penetration or touch, fuck your woman with your mind and emotions - in a good way! 😁 Building tension with desire is it. Don't be afraid of healthy distance with reassurance connection remains. I can't think of anymore and I don't think this answered you with a lot of precision! Because right as I sat posting this on my rooftop, I had a visit from 3 beauties:

Yes. Something to consider at length if it is not obvious.

I'll add @Leo Gura popped in earlier to truly listen also. Notice Leo also didn't just jump in and try to tell anyone. He didn't make judgements or assessments of character. He just asked and took the information to integrate it and assess. Which I think carries a lot of weight. Many philosophers and masters of the past had extremely sexist views. Amazing spiritual insights and masters who were totally backwards in the domain of sex, desire and women. Even today this issue persists - awakening cannot overcome biology and incentive structures. Maybe we, as a community behind Leo, can break that theme of sexism that threads through the masters of the past.

Fear of ones own desire and it's control. Fear of the women who represent that loss of control & desire. Inability to understand the women due to conditioning and beliefs. Fear of what is misunderstood. Truly listening is the way to connect. Connection is the source of all goodness ❤️

@Valach it's interesting because when you think on it - it's blocking all potential for genuine connection ... 😢

I see Miguel as being one of the few to want to simply hear what the women of the forum think/have to say. Earnestly want to hear and try to understand. Not try to listen then prove a point. Others - including yourself - seem to want to tell us how it is. Just comes across that way.