Natasha Tori Maru

Weakness makes Humility I really enjoyed this. It will be a good slow burner for many. Long enduring and intermittently resonant. The implied reversal of the usual moral hierarchy is very well done. A strong person may be less developed in one respect than the vulnerable person; strength is doing the work to insulate them from realities they have not yet to to confront.

Low dose mushrooms seem to be okay on me. I seem to reach some threshold very easily where I lose it. Repeated experiences of losing all my teeth, regrowing them from strange locations (knuckles, between toes, from my forehead), and people turning into incorporeal wraiths with huge, floating red orbs for eyes. The eyes are particularly demonic. Sometimes they fall out of the faces I see, or burst. The variance of drug effects across individuals depending on physiology is crazy. LSD isn't too bad on my system!

@Olaf yes, children mostly cry as a way to signal distress. Regardless of if that "distress" is warranted or not 😁

@Olaf I've always been like this. If anything, becoming more conscious increased my crying! I feel my emotions much more authentically, in a much wider range and with more depth. They are more transient now though. Intense, then done. Back to baseline. I don't feel the need to act on them or solve them any longer. 'Solving' emotions isn't quite right. They are there to be felt, or inspected as a pointer toward an interpretation of meaning,

@Olaf A romantic relationship? Based on history, very little. I tend to cry from sadness or distress mostly when overwhelmingly frustrated (not often, as I am a very capable person with enormous capacity for stress & pressure) or after a breakup. The men I have been with have cried more than myself - and it is not a turnoff for me to witness. I don't experience crying from movies or touching moments. I have cried more in relationship for the happiness of my partner in jubilation than out of distress. I cry very, very often because of music that touches me. This is my biggest "cry" release. Often it is because I am so moved to joy. The tears are happy for me. Based on feedback from people I know, I do not have a common pattern of emotional display

Gotta agree with this. Phenomenology of AI - no reliable basis for claiming it does. Awareness of itself - no reliable basis for claiming it does. Does AI experience itself as a subject? On the flip side, there isn't evidence for any absence of these capacities. 'I don't know" seems to be the only reasonable stance.

You do realise there are many, many other possible explanations for tears, right?

Oh, fuck! I heard he passed and was dismayed to see he was 34yo - I didn't know it was suicide. My heart is broken for victims of suicide

I went HAM with that shit. Also mushrooms. Every time I have had a fucked up trip on mushrooms it was too high a dose. I don't react like this to LSD, weed, DMT or MDMA though. Just seems to be salvia and mushrooms. Way too easy for me to OD. Probably doesn't help I took doses based on my mates capacity (who are men) - and I am a 48kg girl.

Caffeine, Creatine, L-Theanine - all work for me But many of these additional supplements don't move the needle as much as sleep, morning light, hydration, cardio, resistance training and high quality nutrition. Maintaining a healthy body composition. The problem is, no one is really attending to the basics. The basics do most of the work. Supplements just give a slight edge. Even caffeine has pretty big rebound dips in focus

Prior to the salvia trip - I did salvia because I didn't give a fuck. I didn't care if the trip was good or bad. I was trying to escape everything. Seemed like a good escape. WRONG. Nihilism was from trauma prior. I think I wanted to die for a long time.

I expected the replies here to be: 1) health 2) health 3) health... 10) truth Most people aren't wise enough to prevent health issues. They just live with regret. It is one part of suffering that feel I have little control over - especially when our poor health is chronic and presents no solution. Health issues will recalibrate all values like nothing else. My auntie is deep into end stages of MND. After seeing this disease, I am heavily for assisted dying. I hope you have been going alright lately (´｡•_•｡`) ♡

Exercise

I'm on it (after I submit this fucking work tender!!)

@Schizophonia why is crying hurting yourself? Problematic? It's behaviour not character?