Natasha Tori Maru

But that isn't what he asked. That is your interpretation to try to validate your points. Status re-enforcement. The aura points argument is more likely to say more about the person claiming it - namely that they aren't secure in themselves. Comparison based. Inter-male dominance hierarchy stuff. It reads as low status to me from here. In addition "that CAN come across". Yes - it can - it relies on interpretation. One possible interpretation of many. Many dudes won't interpret it in the way you did. Just as insecure guys will see threat. You seem very confused and upset about this topic. Based on the rhetoric you engage in.

Killing two birds there - developing yourself and attracting some ladies at the same time I find men who engage in a passion and share it very attractive. I think this applies to many people in general.

I didn't explicitly state the working mechanisms for healthy, genuine relational connection I experience & prefer. I just chose to answer OP's question around cold approach only (how I prefer it to be done, not if I do or do not want it etc). I read @Emerald's response and agreed with the mechanics as described. I just didn't explicitly make my agreement there clear I didn't mean to appear to be hedging or anything. I felt she nailed it and I had nothing else to add. I tend toward the conclusion that the sort of women to generate instant attraction (or just deeper feelings in a rapid manner) may be responding to some sort of internal, unconscious version of love learned from childhood that may not be healthy. I suppose my non-aversion to cold approach dovetails in well with my little project of resisting Ni compression/closure we have been touching on. I definitely compress and spearhead for closure as a default. I am going the opposite way as a method of meta mind exploration - and I feel like this insane experiment might appeal to you, haha! So far it has lead me down some unusual growth paths - namely in being able to cross pollenate and merge different frameworks together. Feeling and emotional based stuff. @Olaf If your goal is a secure, long term, healthy and mature connection with a women - in my opinion this is the optimal path. Connection through third spaces (or even second, but this has inherent risk, although it is time tested!) is great method.

I think I am open to novelty and new experience to a high degree. But at the same time, I am extremely discerning and know what I want. Someone approaches and I have a snap, intuitive read. I don't often roll with it, just to test it's ability and to ensure I am not needlessly misreading and losing an opportunity. But there is definitely a boundary there, if a guy is signalling any sort of disrespect, charged anger or violence it's an instant no. I suppose it's me testing my gut intuition by remaining open to collecting more data? Most often, the men who are more likely to approach are less patient. And although I might be okay with being approached, I am slow to build genuine feelings of deep attraction and emotional connection. There appears to be a hidden assumption with cold approach that making your intentions (sexually) prominent from the outset, that sexual contact is guaranteed quickly (or quicker). This has just been my experience. I've never had a successful connection develop from any man who cold approached me. All my relationships were vetted through social circle, or some other relationship that didn't involve romance initially (work etc). So the mechanics of attraction as Emerald described are very similar to my own experience. I chose to answer the question differently. Thanks for asking (or prompting) 😁

Even needing to ask what the point of this thread is (in the manner it has been done here) potentially points to a much deeper and concerning issue within these users.

Yes. Misandry. It often gets smuggled into the feminism rhetoric.

It definitely doesn't intentionally teach it. Or guarantee it. Not at all. But the movement did act to give women agency - which freed them to select. That in no way guarantees the selection is of higher quality or better. It does push women to evaluate mens behaviour. But because feminism isnt intended as a female dating strategy, there isn't a guarantee women would learn from it in the way described.

@ElvisN no low quality posts like that, thanks. Inappropriate.

Too much truth for some people 😃

Depends. Did I complete my assigned tasks, to be so rewarded with this confectionery?

My sister is like that 😬 Sorry for semi-derailing there. You provoked some insights for me. And reframes. Cheers for the tag !

Forgot to add to my points above this sort of dovetails with feminism. Some men's negative reaction to feminism may be (partly) explained by feminism changing women's mate-selection in ways that reduce mens control. It increases women's selectivity/sorting/screening through increased agency and make men's behaviour more subject to evaluation. The mechanisms behind feminism act to empower/teach women to screen more effectively, but as a byproduct.

I think ultimately with game/pickup everyone eventually moves on from dedicated, concerted practice due to it becoming (ideally) naturally incorporated into their habits and reflexes. I just view it in the most charitable way as men learning confidence through technique (there is more to it, I am simplifying heavily). That's not to say there aren't crude and exploitative forms of pickup. I don't view it as cringe. In general mens challenges are access and attraction generation; women's are screening, filtering and relationship calibration. This is just in general, as the more high value one is, these challenges can flip and change. Pickup is a structured method to teach the tools for attraction generation and access. Men use these tools. It is transparent. You can learn this also with social circle game. Women also need to learn screening and selection. But because women have access to different tools, how they learn to screen can be different. Therapy can be a way women learn screening, and we don't shitcan that - despite it addressing their challenges (and it isn't marketed as such, but it could viewed as addressing this issue). There are also mate selection training courses, books and coaches for women. There is a legitimate gap in the market here to assist women to select/screen better. Women in general have larger social reach than men, so they essentially have the opportunity to learn via social circle, just like men. This would be an intuitive learning. At the very highest level, both sexes are sort of heading toward "Can I perceive another human being, with accuracy, without projecting my fantasies, fears, desires and stereotypes onto them?" You can also break it down into symmetries for both sexes (again this is in general and can flip with high value mates): Men - Approaching women, Women - Recognising and allowing access to good men Men Creating attraction, Women - Evaluating attraction, not confusing it with compatibility Men - Flirting/charisma, Women - Reading men's intentions, character, social behaviour Men - Handling rejection, Women - Handling abundance without becoming indiscriminately cynical Men - Escalating, Women - Setting boundaries and observing how he responds Men - Getting dates, Women - Filtering dates efficiently Men - Game, Women - Discernment Men - Avoiding the friendzone, Women - Avoiding the manipulator/player Men - Learning female psychology, Women - Learning male psychology Men - Screening for attraction, Women - Screening for character, stability, compatibility I suppose I am attempting to reframe pickup and flesh out a female equivalent here! And just as pickup can give women the ick, I can perceive how the above dating points/advice/training for women can give men the ick also. Imagine a female dating course taking into account the above points - it could sound viscerally gross to men! Some men do not learn well how to attract and get access to women via social circle, so game provides a structural frame to apply. Some women do not learn to filter and select well through social circle also. They might end up in therapy which can, although not it's primary mechanism, assist here. Women are probably less likely to reach out for a structured training method to select, though.