Natasha Tori Maru

I should have worded it better - unhealthy types perceive those dudes as 'boring'. But they aren't, it's just that women with attachment issues cannot recognise healthy love so they dismiss it. This is also a heavy function of maturity in general. Young women... These days. I simply don't understand them. They are being brainwashed by extreme feminism in the algorithm just as men are falling into red pill....

Totally cool 😃 I'm so very sorry you suffered that. I have been blessed to never be abused sexually. I can never know the pain it has caused you 🙏🏻

@Rafael Thundercat no one is doing what this transcript suggests.

In general women with attachment issues are attracted to the fun charismatic guy, or men with dark triad traits. It isn't as clear cut as put above. Goes for both sexes. Securly attached women (or people) will be attracted to the 'boring' dude. Other types of women don't have a healthy idea of what love is, so mistake other traits for it and self filter out the best, healthiest men. The same goes for men also. If I am not mistaken approx 30% of the population has secure attachment. A lot of red pill and pickup relies on attraction techniques that only attract women with these trends of issues with attachment. It effectively filters out healthy women - leading to confirmation bias this is 'what women are attacted to'. In reality, it's not as simple or clear cut.

Great read, thanks for sharing. @Basman the longer a cognitive bias is present the more embedded it becomes. The bias is feeding a belief founded on feeling and emotion, repetition & reward. And like you raised, it becomes a cognitive shortcut that never gets challenged. Shame is usually a key driver, but these sorts of thinking patterns also serve a sense of competence, belonging and control. The shame factor comes into it when the belief is tied to an identity that makes being wrong feel being being 'less'. Which is a threat. And threat management is probably the dominant driver once identity is involved like this....

It's gonna be GoDmAXxING and tRiPMaXXiNG next - end me now

@Miguel1 I suspect there could be some jestermaxxing in @Questioning Mark's post

Just because I intellectually and cognitively understand and empathise with a pedophile, does not mean I risk my own morals of the matter. It is a detached understanding . Different to affective and feeling empathy - where we feel for another's suffering without the understating. Real power is mastering the two axis' of empathy, and not getting swept up into moral judgement, but understanding it.

Just because I am putting forth an argument for a topic, does not mean I do not understand the other side of it. I did not state I have no empathy for the one judging the pedophile. I understand this stance also - and I feel and understand greater empathy for those who suffer the acts of pedophiles, and the widespread damage they do to society. I lean on the side of rebuking and feeling disgusted by pedophilia. As I stated at the start of the thread. Careful what assumptions and inferences you make. This is a purely intellectual debate for me, despite the tragedy of the general existence of pedophiles. And the moral consequences. I merely illustrate perspective and want to investigate all sides.

My ex is a fireman - it is well known in the brigades the shit they inhale and are exposed to is lethal. They heavily advocate for fireys who suffer lung damage in the field. Many guys retire with extensive and permanent damage to their airways It's a huge hazard and known risk with the job.

This is my experience. I can understand that if I were transposed into a pedophiles body/consciousness I would suffer my desire. I would feel revulsion at what my body was attracted to. That is not to say all pedophiles suffer their desire. Some may have no morals and not consider the consequences of acting on them. For myself there is an intellectual understanding and cerebral empathy, and there is a direct feeling based intuitive empathy. This nuance is important as it is a split many gloss over. Affective felt empathy vs intellectual cognitive empathy. You can understand someone perfectly and feel nothing. You can feel someone’s pain deeply and have no idea why it’s happening.

Unhinged levels of play

Used to straight bulldoze wisdom and advice into people when all they wanted to do was vent. They didn't actually want a solution. Used truth as a weapon to justify my own lack of tact and grace. Now I only bulldoze when other methods don't work huehuehue Projected my own aptitude and capability onto others. When they displayed ineptitude or weakness I refused to accept it because *I* could do it. Golden shadow. Now I accept others are limited without resentment or holding it against them. Used to overshare a lot when I went through CPTSD. Openly spoke about being assaulted, tortured and psychologically abused. Couldn't read the room when others reacted strangely. Thank fuck I have healed all these issues! Used to judge others for engaging in society and capitalism. Used to straight judge a lot more. Now I discern more and try remove my own moral feelings from matters. Work in progress 👠🚀❤️

Oh nah, nah I do not feel attacked at all. Just how it appeared with responses back and forth between everyone contributing. Both sides aren't very willing to concede points - and that is because discussions like this suffer from domain and category errors all parties cannot get past. It is good to see a huge variety of perspectives and you contribute to that! All G 🙏

Understood. My point was simply to express how much being an attractive female affects so much of our lives, and in a positive way that we are completely blind to, because we have no other direct experience to measure against. The statements I make do not mean I am not aware of downsides. I merely illustrate potential gaps in understanding.