caspex

I appreciate the replies. I have decided to integrate and go deeper with these current states instead of suspecting any further leaps of consciousness. I might make a similar post next year. @Someone hereThat's a good point. I forgot that model was a thing. I'll rewatch that video as well. Thank you.

@Karla That's why I asked you all

I appreciate the replies. But I feel like there is something more. @Leo Gura I'd appreciate it if you have anything to say. I don't know who else to tag... Should I start taking psychedelics? I still think it's too early for me. I am sure they would open a new dimension of depth for me but I'd have to invest time and money to get some which is relatively high for me right now. Plus after watching the dangers of psychedelics video I want to work on my shadow more. Or maybe I should stop being such a pussy about it and get some, I am confused.

Hey so this is sort of a continuation of this post I made a year ago: I have now successfully internalized that state somewhat. I do not feel empty and lonely by being the only one, my heart feels full and complete. I am happy, I feel joy, but strangely I am still curious. A feeling that I can go further. The very fact I feel this way, that I need to make this post, means I am missing something, but I don't get it. I need help. Here's how my state is for context: I don't exist and my chest feels full. Existence including my body is filled with joy. We are all one, so there's no we. Existence is perfect and unfolding as it should. It's unfolding and absolutely still at the same time. I feel like a video game playing itself. I am God. Aham Brahmasmi. There's no doubt about it. This joy of being eternal and immortal brings immense joy, but since nobody experiences it, it only multiplies and increases. Here's the problem: This joy brings with itself satisfaction, but I push it away. That's because I once heard somebody talk about how satisfaction on the spiritual path will stagnate you from going further. Is the next step to just let that principle go and be satisfied? How can I then ensure I progress? I don't even know what's next. Do I just deepen this feeling as God?

It's in the phrase, you're making it up.

You're description seems the most accurate to me. This would explain why achieving enlightenment before physical death completely circumvents heaven and hell straight to moksha. But yeah you know, you're still gonna come back. This is why I like Bhakti yoga because if your version is right, that means those who do Bhakti might go to a made up world of their deity instead of heaven and hell, and before they eventually reincarnate, they might get to enjoy eternity with their favorite idol. I don't know.

From what I can gather, once you truly die you become pure potential, which is what nothingness is. But pure potential cannot help but become something eventually. This is why I think reincarnation is the most likely. But we must also consider whether there exists other layers of this living being that might continue after physical death. Either way, whatever happens after death would not be permanent, like everything else. I think you should rather be relieved to know your existence is eternal. What's terrifying is that you'd be eternal as well, which I don't see to be the case.

It means u r on the forumz to much touch grass

If the physical layer was out of sync with the energetic layer they wouldn't stick together for so long and the body would die. You might be misidentifying a fabricated aspect of your being with the energetic layer. From what I can gather, when you don't feel like you're in sync, that's mostly activity on the mental/emotional plane largely concerned with survival. I think there's great insight in it when you say we're not humans and actually metaphysical beings however the feeling of 'you' such as a unicorn, baby or a velociraptor is not part of that metaphysical being in any objective sense. It's rather a survival oriented fabrication by the emotional/mental layer of your being. That changes overtime and therefore what feels like 'being you'. It's not great practice to put so much emphasis on 'feeling'. Energy is mostly becomed not felt; then it becomes really hard to see through that it's still not you. The energetic layer, when experienced is overwhelmingly intense, at least for me. It's not a mere feeling or emotion.

I don't think you need to think that much about it. Solipsism in the sense Leo said, iirc, is about stuff being made up as you go. Since you don't exist, it's wrong to attribute this creation to your finite self, because that's only a part of the creation. When observed carefully, there's only this creation, which has to be 'you' because there's nothing else (not like there could be). I mean, there's an innate sense that the entirety of existence is you, which arises sometime after dissolving the self. But the story, regardless of seeing everything as yourself, continues of an existence beyond this right here. I think such solipsism arises when you completely let go all stories, and be the truth that has always been here. When you feel this state, after having already realized everything as yourself, it combines to form this sense of 'Completeness'. At least that's what I can gather. There's no controller, and there's no logic outside the logic that is already a part of the existence. The why to how things are is how things are. The reason I say all this is because when we focus on such truth, we focus on letting go of stories we're so fond of holding onto. So when you worry about those questions you asked in the post, you're creating more stories which defeats the purpose. 'Different Solipsistic Universes' 'Vast Void of creativity' 'Subconscious' Hear yourself, aren't these all just more stories? What you're asking feels like practical insights as to how to not go mad and berserk once you're in solipsism, but that doesn't happen in the first place.

I watched Leo's video on a commonplace book a few years ago and decided to use Obsidian to make one, I ended up getting really far in with Journals, notes and other stuff. But at some point I realized that I wasn't gaining any value from the commonplace book, I was only trying to parrot the idea of a commonplace book. I think it is necessary for you to first consider whether you really need a commonplace book or not. For me at this point, it's mainly academic stuff like storing notes and other important resources I have created or compiled inside my Google Drive. Sometimes I open a new Google Doc for writing plans or ideas, but I have never actually needed to link stuff together. You can call that my commonplace book in that there are different sections for fitness, projects and academics. Considering that I am pursuing many academic pursuits the google drive is quite vast. I prefer Google Drive despite the lack of interlinking and other features Obsidian or other note taking apps provide. This is mostly because I need to store data in a wide variety of file formats that gets quite cumbersome with Obsidian. If you're writing a book, doing research or doing elaborate planning then I feel Obsidian works the best. But for my daily life, I have never needed a commonplace book to store insights or other stuff. Maybe it's because I was never really serious about spirituality or contemplation, or maybe it is because I am not at that stage yet. I am mostly Orange right now. All I can say is that I tried it and it was too complex for my needs, and I feel you should consider that too before starting this stuff.

Prolly not aliens. I imagine a bunch of rishis got together in what would be the leading group of scholars around the land at that time and decided to standardize the already existing language.

I know maybe 10% sanskrit from all the shastras I have read. I have done a lot of mantra chanting and here's what I know about sanskrit. Sanskrit sticks incredibly fast to memory. Maybe it is just me but I can memorize a page of sanskrit 10 times faster than any other language i know (english and hindi). It just works so well together there is no way Sanskrit is a naturally occurring language, it is most definitely a constructed one. In fact, you don't have even to know the meaning of the words, there is something about how the syllables go together that make it easy to remember. No wonder there's a school of hinduism where people memorize the entire vedas (about 20000 mantras). As for mantras, they won't work if you don't do the correct sadhna along with the mantra. Even within the sadhna, you need to visualise things correctly. Baseless parroting doesn't get you anywhere.

Update The last few weeks have been very emotionally challenging for me. I don't want to share the cause here, but it has been filled with suffering. I have tried to continue the practice multiple times but failed to make it past 3 days a few times due to the said cause. I feel good enough to properly start again now. I'll update tomorrow. @Carl-Richard Thanks for the tips!

Day 2 31 Minutes. Even though I get proper sleep at proper times I fell into a hypnagogic haze, where my thoughts made very little sense. I was sitting upright and cross legged, so it was not like I had any support to my back that made me sleepy. I think I caught myself from falling back about 3 times. Honestly I am having no problems with pain at all. It's not pleasant but it's alright. I understand that half an hour is not a long time and it is probably why I am having an easier time. I am planning on 40 minutes tomorrow. 30 minutes is like the very edge of when the real pain starts. By the last few minutes I always feel like giving up, so I am expecting tomorrow to be hard. One thing's clear now, my mind is so overstimulated it keeps me entertained through random thoughts even in SDS. I try not to engage in these thoughts and just observe them, being a rock myself, but that's probably why I fell asleep. I didn't want to stop my mind from running amok as that counts as doing something. I get the impression that my focus should also remain inwards. It's honestly kind of disgusting, it's like my mind has eaten too much and is shitting itself all the time. Most of the thoughts make no sense unless I intentionally engage with me. This is classic monkey mind and there are a lot of resources for dealing with this. I know what I have to do, which is to cut off a lot of the source of stimulation to make these SDS higher in quality. Without acting on these realizations there's no point in continuing the sits or increasing their time. From now on I'll keep my phone in a drawer till 6PM, which is when I am done studying, only using it for stuff like picking up calls. I don't want to go cold turkey on it.